do cruise ships have balconies

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Everything to Know about Balcony Cabins on a Cruise (Read Before Booking)

Think of a cruise, and you might picture sitting on a cabin balcony, sipping a drink, and watching the waves go by. It’s a classic staple of taking a cruise.

Cruise ship balcony cabins are popular, and for good reason. They provide your own little oasis, away from the rest of the ship, along with million-dollar views that you simply can’t get on land. 

But before you drop the money to book that balcony, there are some things you’ll want to know about sailing in this type of cabin. 

Note: This article contains links to our partner, Cruise Critic. We earn a commission for clicks made on their website, at no charge to you.

Balcony Cabins Are Often Larger (Even Without the Outdoor Space)

Of course the biggest perk of a balcony cabin is having the outdoor space; that’s no argument. But one thing you might not realize is another perk — balcony cabins are normally larger than non-balcony rooms.

For instance, an interior cabin on a ship might be 140 square feet in space, while a balcony cabin might be 170 square feet, plus the additional outdoor space. Of course, the figures will change from ship to ship, but you can expect to see the trend on many cruise lines.

For example, you can see the difference on this Royal Caribbean cruise aboard Navigator of the Seas where the balcony room is considerably larger than an interior even before the balcony space is added in:

The Rooms Are More Expensive (50%-100% Over Interior)

We all understand that a balcony cabin is also going to come with a higher price tag. What you might not realize is that the increase  can vary widely. Pricing will vary ship by ship and even down to the specific cruise.

Instead, you should just anticipate the price difference between a basic bare-bones interior cabin and a balcony room. In our estimation, it seems to run between 50%-100% more for a balcony cabin.

So if a 7-day cruise for an interior cabin is $500 per person, expect a balcony to be between $750 and $1,000.

You can check prices for balconies versus interior cabins for specific cruises with our partner Cruise Critic, here .

You’ll Likely Use the Balcony Less Than You Think (But It’s Still Wonderful to Have)

If you are considering booking a balcony cabin, you might picture yourself sitting out and taking in the view for hours on end each day. The reality is a bit different.

Yes, you definitely can do that if you want to, but you might be surprised at how little time overall you actually spend there. Between activities around the ship, mealtimes, and being out in ports of call, the amount of time to actually just sit and do nothing is less than you think, unless you make it a priority. 

All you have to do is take a look at a ship in port and see how few people are actually out on the balcony. It seems what’s more common is to sit occasionally and other times simply popping out for a few minutes to take in the view before heading off to do something else.

Even so, being able to have that outdoor access to take in some fresh air and a view is still a great thing to enjoy, even for a short bit.

Balconies Themselves May Not Be That Large

When you think of your balcony, maybe you think of a large area where you can lay out and get some sun, or enjoy a meal sitting at a table. The reality is somewhat different. Balconies will vary in size, but for the most part they are relatively small.

While they are the width of the cabin — usually around 8-10 feet, the typical balcony doesn’t offer much depth. We’d estimate about 4-5 feet. There’s enough space for a couple of chairs and a small table between, but that’s about it.

That’s not to say you can’t find larger balconies on the ship — there are some large enough in some high-end cabins to have their own hot tub — but in general the space is modest.

These Rooms Are Great for Longer Trips (6+ Days)

We’re strong believers that on a short cruise of five days or fewer, you can get by without having a balcony cabin. On a short trip, between everything to do on board and being in ports of call, the amount of time you’ll take advantage of the balcony is relatively small. It’s nice to have, but not a must.

On trips longer than that, the amount of “downtime” you have increases. That means more time to take advantage of the balcony space. As well, on longer trips simply having access to some fresh air and natural light in the cabin is a major benefit. ( See cruise offers for trips of 6 days and longer here .)

Light/Late Sleepers Might Have Issues

If you’re a light sleeper — or you like to sleep in — then a balcony room actually might have a disadvantage. You see, with one of these cabins the end of your room is essentially a wall of windows with a glass door that leads out. It’s wonderful for views, but can also be bright.

There is a blackout curtain that you can pull to close off the light coming in, but even then there will normally be light around the edges on the sides, top and bottom. The result is that even if you try to make it as dark as possible, there’s going to be some light entering the room in the mornings. So if you had a late night and want to sleep in, it could be enough to disturb you.

Infinite Balconies Are a New Style on Some Ships

As of now, most balcony cabins are a traditional style where you have the cabin, and then a door that leads out to the outdoor balcony. But some newer ships are changing that style with a few rooms.

Dubbed an “infinite balcony,” this style makes the balcony and the cabin one space. At the end of the cabin you’ll have a full window wall instead of a door leading outdoors. The top half of this wall slides down, essentially like a large horizontal window. With the window up, you have all the space of the cabin and balcony to enjoy indoors. With the window down, it’s as if your entire cabin is now the balcony as it’s open to the outside air.

Your Balcony May Not Be Private

To be sure, there is a lot of privacy to your own balcony. Traditionally, there are dividers on either side of you, meaning that you won’t have your neighbor staring at you if you both decide to sit outside at the same time.

But don’t think it’s completely private. For one, any sound will travel. So if you and your neighbors are both sitting outside, you will hear each other talking.

Meanwhile, the dividers usually leave gaps around the bottom and the edges, so just passing in and out you might catch sight of someone else, similar to a stall in a restroom.

All that’s to say if you were thinking about getting some sunshine where the sun don’t shine or maybe getting frisky with your significant other in the fresh air… you might want to be careful that others don’t catch a glimpse.

To search for a deal a balcony cabin, you can find the latest offers with Cruise Critic, here .

More on choosing a cabin:

• Should I Book an Interior or Balcony Cabin on my Cruise?
• Everything to Know About Interior Cruise Cabins
• Why You Should Never Go Nude On Your Cruise Balcony

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With the infinite balcony keep in mind that the air automatically shuts off when the window is down. Even with the dividers closed.

We had a balcony on our cabin for the last cruise and it ended up that we could barely use it because we had noisy neighbors on both sides that would go out on the balcony and Blair loud music at all hours of the day and night

All true but we will not cruise without one. They are great but be sure to book ABOVE THE OBSTRUCTIONS such as lifeboats corners etc.

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When Is a Cruise Ship Balcony Worth It and When Is It Not?

When is a cruise-ship balcony worth the splurge?   Sometimes booking a private veranda is a no-brainer for the vistas, the quick access to fresh air, lots of light, and the extra real estate. But sometimes, because of weather or your itinerary, a balcony may not be worth the extra cost.

I’ve sailed on 300 different cruises, from luxury ocean crossings to European river journeys to an expedition ship in Antarctica , and here’s how I weigh the pros and cons of private balconies on three common styles of small-to-mid-sized vessels.

River Ships

What to Expect: On European rivers, there are two types of balconies: The traditional, step-out space with chairs, and a “French Veranda”—essentially, a wall of glass (via windows that can be lowered with a push of a button or patio-style sliders) that is framed by railings.

The traditional balconies are smaller than what you’d find on an ocean ship because river vessels must fit through narrow locks. Still, there’s room for a couple of chairs and a small cocktail table.

In the priciest suites on a few ships, the balconies are much roomier.   Viking River Cruises’ Explorer Suites, for instance, have balconies that are almost as spacious as those of ocean-going ships, and their aft-facing view is relaxing while traveling on a river.

Explorer Suites on Viking’s Longships have relatively spacious balconies. Photo: Viking Cruises

Some river cruise lines, including Uniworld and Avalon, have only French verandas. This offers access to fresh air and views (on Avalon, if you push a chair up to the rail, it’s almost a real balcony experience) and, because there’s not a separate, defined outdoor area, cabins tend to be more spacious.

Staterooms with French verandas or private balconies are typically located on the top decks of a river-cruise vessel.  The low deck offers window-only cabins, usually with no view—just a bit of light. These windows are typically long and narrow and located high up on the wall.

Avalon Waterways’ Panorama Suite has “French balconies.” Photo: Avalon Waterways

Know this: The challenge with any type of balcony on a river ship—particularly on a cruise along the Rhine or the Danube—is that during the day, in port, ships may have to tie up to one another; this can completely block not just your view but also your light and privacy. Also, on river cruises you typically spend a lot of time off the ship in river towns; as many balcony cabins as I’ve had, there was never much time to enjoy them.

My Take: Cruising on rivers is all about the landscapes you’re passing through. If you stick to your balcony, you limit your view to just one side of the river. You’ll likely want to head up to the observation deck for 360-degree vistas instead. But since the only other room option—a window-only cabin on a low deck—can feel a bit claustrophobic, I’d prefer a balcony of any kind. Just don’t assume you’ll be using it for hours every day.

Ocean Ships

What to Expect: Balconies are a no-brainer on an ocean cruise—everyone wants one. The good news is that cruise lines have dramatically increased the percentage of balconied staterooms on ships built since about 2010 (the newer, the better). That means balconies are easier to snag and are a better value. On larger vessels—such as those of Celebrity, Holland America, and Oceania—all verandas are comfortable, but the best belong to the highest-level suites and can come with extras such as whirlpools and dining tables.

On a trip around the Greek Isles, coffee on the balcony was a wonderful morning ritual. Photo: Carolyn Spencer Brown

On smaller ships, and particularly on luxury lines, verandas are a wonderful place to dine al fresco or simply stretch out on a lounger in your own private space. Even cruise lines with slightly older small ships, like Windstar with its intimate power yachts, have added French verandas to standard-sized cabins; these vessels have a handful of actual sit-out spaces in top suites too.

Know This: Location can matter! One of the best spots for a balconied cabin (or suite) is on a ship’s aft deck, facing backward over the wake. It’s an incredibly soothing sight ,and often these verandas (even with a standard-category cabin) are deeper and roomier than usual. By contrast, forward-facing balconies are more subject to winds, movement, and sea spray. You also will want to avoid any forward-facing balcony cabin that’s directly under the bridge (the key navigational area of the ship): At night you may be limited in their use, as the light can hamper operations.

A forward-facing balcony on Windstar Cruises’ Star Breeze in Tahiti. Photo: Wendy Perrin

My Take: The bigger the ship, the more crowded the public spaces can be, so it’s nice to have a private slice of the outdoors to relax in from time to time. Breakfast on your veranda is a perfect vacation indulgence (and room service is typically free). At sea, the ocean view is lovely and even in most ports, ships don’t dock too close to each other, so you have nice vistas there too.

Even on smaller, more luxurious ships that don’t feel crowded, a balcony is desirable; if the weather is such that you can spend a lot of time on your balcony, it’s like having an additional room.

Expedition Ships

What to Expect: The hottest new trend in expedition cruising—itineraries to the most remote destinations on earth—is vessels that have all the comforts of small luxury ships, including private balconies. Expedition vessels built since 2014 increasingly have more spacious accommodations that include verandas. Cruise lines whose newest expedition ships have private balconies include Ponant, Scenic, Seabourn, and Silversea. In other cases, lines such as Lindblad offer balconies only in top suite categories.

On Silversea’s Galapagos-based Silver Origin, a temperate climate offers lots of opportunities for enjoying your balcony; this one’s part of the Royal Suite. Photo: Silversea

You may even have a choice of French verandas or traditional ones. On Viking’s Octantis and Polaris expedition vessels, a handful of top suites have normal balconies, while the standard accommodations have “Nordic balconies” that are similar to French verandas, with windows that open halfway.

Know This: How much you actually use a balcony on an expedition cruise is highly affected by your itinerary and the weather. On a cruise to the polar regions, where conditions can be cold and stormy, a private veranda is nice if you want to be able to jump outside to capture a photo, but you likely won’t be spending time lounging or dining there. If you’re headed to a tropical destination, such as the Galapagos, verandas are a wonderful indulgence—and much in demand.

On Silversea Cruises’ Silver Endeavour in Antarctica, a private balcony may be great for capturing photos but not for dining. Photo: Carolyn Spencer Brown

My Take: On my Antarctica cruise last year , my balcony was a nice extra but not a necessity. We loved dashing outside to admire a passing glacier or penguins wobbling up an icy hill, but the weather was too cold to enjoy a meal or a cocktail there. And, as is common on expedition vessels, the best vantage points in such dramatic locales were the upper decks where, both inside and out, we could see the view from 360 degrees.

The cruise specialists on our WOW List of Trusted Travel Experts can help you weigh the pros and cons of a balcony on any ocean, river, or expedition cruise. Not sure which cruise or expert is right for you? Ask for our advice via the black button below.

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I would also add, in particular with respect to river cruising, and having recently come back from an enjoyable one on the Danube, another consideration would be how much daylight cruising you will be doing. On our cruise I figure there was only about 3 hours of daylight cruising so our nice French Balcony on the top deck was not as “cost-effective” as it might have been on some other route(s) and/or at some other time of year. As we were cruising late in the fall season it was darker later in the morning and earlier in the afternoon, affecting this equation as well. Nothing is simple. You have to do your homework.

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Are There Cameras On Cruise Ship Balconies? (Privacy Concerns Answered!)

I remember the first cruise I booked with a balcony! I felt like it was my own slice of privacy on a packed boat.

But, how private are cruise balconies? Do they have cameras?

And (we’re all thinking it) can you have sex on your balcony? Let’s dive deep (pun intended) and find out…

Table of Contents

Are There Cameras On Cruise Ship Balconies?

While there won’t be a camera specifically monitoring your individual balcony, cruise ships have cameras installed throughout the ship for passenger safety. This means that even a “private balcony” can be monitored. It’s important to note that without these cameras, cruise ships would have no way of knowing if someone went overboard.

Their primary purpose is to ensure the safety and security of passengers, crew members, and the vessel itself.

The placement and visibility of these cameras can vary depending on the cruise line and the ship.

On some ships, cameras might be visible, while on others, they may blend in with the design of the ship to be more discreet.

Remember, these cameras are primarily intended for security purposes and not to intrude on your privacy.

The cruise ship staff and security personnel are bound by strict policies and guidelines to respect your privacy while ensuring everyone’s safety on board.

When you are out on your balcony, you may still have some semblance of privacy. While an occasional camera may be angled in such a way that it could capture your balcony, it is highly unlikely that it is actively monitored unless there is a specific concern or potential issue.

Plus, your balcony light can be controlled by you until 2:00 am, with the Bridge having the ability to override and turn off the lights on the balconies after that time for safety reasons.

So while it is true that cameras are present on cruise ships, the likelihood of them specifically pointing at your balcony or intruding on your privacy is quite low.

However, you should always be mindful of your surroundings and take necessary precautions to ensure your privacy, such as drawing the curtains when changing clothes or engaging in any personal activities in your stateroom.

Cruise Ship Balcony Privacy

Typical Balcony Layout

Typically, cruise ship balconies are designed with your privacy in mind.

They are separated from neighboring balconies by partitions and usually have high enough railings to obscure the view from other passengers walking below your balcony.

The setup helps keep you comfortably out of sight of your neighbors and most public areas.

However, despite this focus on privacy, there have been concerns and rumors about cameras on cruise ship balconies.

Some cruise ships do, however, have balconies that have views of the balconies below them.

It’s important to be mindful of your cabin balcony as not all cruise ships are the same.

Cruise ship security won’t be using the installed cameras to peer into your balcony door, but there can be the chance you are in sight of it.

Security cameras are common on cruise ships but are generally concentrated in public spaces to help ensure the safety of passengers and crew members.

These cameras are not used for surveillance purposes of individual cabins and are not continuously monitored.

Obstructed Views

The design and positioning of cruise ship balconies can sometimes lead to obstructed views, which may help preserve your privacy even further.

For example, some balconies may have lifeboats just below them, partially blocking the view from the lower decks .

Additionally, the ship’s architecture and various on-board equipment can also aid in concealing your balcony, making it difficult for others to spot you.

It is important to note that obstructed views may vary depending on the location and layout of your specific balcony, but you can rest assured that most cruise ships put a significant amount of thought into ensuring both the privacy and enjoyment of their passengers.

Camera Surveillance on Ships

Security Measures

When you’re on a cruise ship, your safety and security are taken very seriously. Cruise ships have extensive camera surveillance systems in place, helping to ensure a safe environment for both passengers and crew members.

These systems not only help to prevent crime but also enable quick response in case of emergencies.

There is a mixture of visible and covert cameras in various public areas throughout your cruise.

While there are cameras located throughout the ship, it is important to remember that not every corner is monitored.

Security personnel will check back tapes when necessary but it is unlikely they are monitoring surveillance cameras 24/7.

Public Areas

In the public areas of the ship, surveillance cameras are more common.

Areas such as the main deck, dining rooms, entertainment venues, and activity centers are often monitored to ensure a secure and enjoyable experience for all passengers.

However, it’s important to understand that while camera surveillance is an essential security measure on cruise ships, it should not substitute for personal vigilance and common sense.

Always remain aware of your surroundings and take necessary precautions, such as:

• Locking your cabin and balcony doors when not in use
• Not leaving personal belongings unattended in public areas
• Avoiding discussing personal travel plans with strangers

Remember, camera surveillance is there to enhance your safety and security on the cruise ship, and while having security cameras on balconies might seem intrusive, they are ultimately intended to protect you and your fellow passengers.

Cruise Line Policies

When it comes to safety and privacy on your cruise ship balcony, different cruise lines have their own set of policies.

Some cruise lines do, in fact, have cameras on their balconies, but these cameras aren’t used for recording or monitoring passengers’ activities or looking through your balcony door.

Instead, they’re utilized to keep an eye on the outdoor areas of the ship for security purposes.

Regardless of whether there are cameras on the balconies, each cruise line has specific rules to follow.

These rules are in place to ensure the safety and comfort of all passengers onboard.

One notable rule to consider is the ban on smoking on most cruise ship balconies . This policy was introduced due to safety concerns, and taking it lightly may result in hefty fines and even the risk of disembarkation.

Another aspect to keep in mind while enjoying your cruise ship balcony is that your privacy may not be as guaranteed as it seems.

This is because passengers from neighboring balconies or even from higher decks might be able to see your balcony. It’s important to be aware of your surroundings and act responsibly to avoid any potential issues.

Ensuring Privacy On A Cruise Balcony

Using Curtains

One easy and effective way to maintain your privacy in your cabin is by utilizing curtains. Most cruise ship balconies come with curtains that completely cover the sliding glass doors leading out to the balcony.

By closing these curtains, you’re creating a barrier between your cabin and the outside world.

Whenever you are changing or engaging in adult activities, you may want to close the blinds.

Experts advise that you should always close your curtains on a cruise ship, as nearby surveillance cameras may have a wider view than you think.

Avoid Changing or Sunbathing Nude

Unless you’re on a nudist cruise , you will want to avoid changing or sunbathing naked on the balcony.

Although tempting, you can easily be seen if you sunbathe nude. Whether by the surveillance cameras or other passengers.

Even if you’re on a balcony with privacy walls or curtains, there’s still a chance that someone may be able to catch a glimpse of you.

Plus, some cruise ships have strict policies against nudity or indecent exposure, and you could face disciplinary action if you’re caught breaking these rules.

To avoid any potential embarrassment or legal issues, it’s best to wear appropriate clothing when you’re on your balcony.

If you need to change clothes, use the cabin’s bathroom instead of the balcony. And if you want to sunbathe, wear a swimsuit or other appropriate clothing that covers your private areas.

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Carnival Cruise Cove Balconies: Everything You Should Know

On my last Carnival cruise, I was checking out Cove Balconies, and guess what? I went for it because these rooms have some cool perks. Regular balconies don’t. 

Cove Balconies give you extra privacy and are super close to the water. They’re a smart choice for budget-savvy travelers who still want a private outdoor spot. 

So, hang on, fellow cruisers. In this guide, I’ve discussed everything you need to know about Cove Balconies and why I think they’re better than the standard ones. Also, in the end, I’ll help you make a great decision for your cruise.

So let’s get started.

Table of Contents

What Is A Cove Balcony on Carnival?

A Cove Balcony on Carnival Cruise ships is a unique type of balcony stateroom located on the ship’s lower decks and is more enclosed than a standard balcony.

These balconies have a cove-like enclosure, and the bottom half of the balcony rail has a solid steel panel.

Due to their presence at the lower decks, cove balconies provide a great view of the ocean and the ship’s wake, making them a center of attention among the cruisers.

Which Decks Have Cove Balconies?

On a Carnival Cruises the Cove Balconies are on the lower decks, like Deck 2 or Deck 5, depending on the ship. You’ll find them in category 7C staterooms on Carnival’s Excel-class, Vista-class, and Dream-class ships. Every ship built since 2009 has them.

If you’re sailing on Excel-class ships like Mardi Gras, Carnival Celebration, or Carnival Jubilee, there are also some Cloud 9 Spa Cove Balcony rooms (category 7S). These are close to the spa and include a pass for unlimited use of the thermal suite facilities.

For families cruising on Vista-class ships like Carnival Vista, Carnival Horizon, and Carnival Panorama, there’s also the option of a cove balcony with the FM and FS categories of Family Harbor Suites.

How Are Cove Balconies Different From Standard Balconies?

The major difference lies in the shape of both balconies. Cove balconies are more enclosed, with small openings and more solid walls between you and your neighbor.

Below are other unique features of Cove Balcony:

1- The Privacy

Cove Balconies are surprisingly more private than the standard ones on Deck 2, below the hanging lifeboats.

So you won’t have to worry about nosy neighbors peeking around the divider into your balcony.

And don’t think people can look down and watch you enjoying your morning coffee. You won’t have any of these issues with a Cove Balcony stateroom because they’re above Deck 1 oceanview cabins, giving you privacy from below, too.

I was so surprised by the quiet environment; I didn’t hear any neighbor voices, thanks to the sound of water. 

2- The Extra Balcony Space

Cove Balconies are 10 square feet bigger than regular balconies, giving you more space to relax and enjoy the breeze and views.

Despite being enclosed partially, a cove balcony is 45ft² whereas a regular balcony is 35ft². That’s 28% larger than a regular balcony, giving you more space to enjoy.

3- The Coverage

As well as offering extra space, Carnival’s Cove balconies also provide more shade and coverage for sitting in on rainy and sunny days.

If you have a rainy sea day , the lifeboats cover your balcony well, so you can still sit outside and enjoy the breeze.

This also comes in handy when you want to enjoy the sea views on a sunny day and want shade. 

However, it’s important to note that the time of the day and direction of travel will impact this.

As mentioned above, cove balconies are on Deck 2 or 5, depending on the ship, meaning you are just feet from the water and the ocean’s roar.

Honestly, sometimes I could even feel the spray of the water. And if that beautiful, close-up, 180-degree view isn’t enough to convince you to book a Cove Balcony.

Some neighbors say they’ve seen dolphins swimming alongside the ship from their Cove Balconies.

However, due to the distance from the ocean, they can get wet at times and have a hatch that can be closed during bad weather and rough seas.

I suggest booking a cabin not too close to the front of the ship; that way, you won’t have to deal with as much spray from the ship’s movement.

5- Getting On And Off The Ship

Because it’s lower on the ship, getting on and off at ports is a breeze—you’re right near the gangway. This is also great if you or yours are prone to seasickness in rough seas .

Which Carnival Ships Have Cove Balconies?

Cove balconies are in category 7C staterooms on Carnival’s Excel-class, Vista-class, and Dream-class ships. That’s every ship that has been built since 2009.

• Carnival Breeze Cove Balcony
• Carnival Celebration Cove Balcony and Cloud 9 Spa Cove Balcony
• Carnival Dream Cove Balcony
• Carnival Horizon Cove Balcony and Family Harbor Suite Cove Balcony
• Carnival Jubilee Cove Balcony and Cloud 9 Spa Cove Balcony
• Carnival Vista Cove Balcony and Family Harbor Suite Cove Balcony
• Mardi Gras Cove Balcony and Cloud 9 Spa Cove Balcony
• Carnival Magic Cove Balcony
• Carnival Panorama Cove Balcony and Family Harbor Suite Cove Balcony

How Much Do Cove Balconies Cost?

Cove Balconies are cheaper than regular ones. Regular balconies usually cost more because of their location on the ship.

However, the actual price of Cove Balcony cabins depends on the ship, the cruise length, and the booking time.

I recommend checking the Carnival Cruise website to get the most updated and accurate information on the prices of the Cove balcony.

Carnival Cruise Latest Deals

With cove balconies, should you choose cove balcony cabins.

Choosing a cabin type on Carnival depends on your needs and preferences. To make your decisions easy, I’ve compiled a list of the pros and cons of these balconies. Have a look.

• Larger in size
• Provide more coverage and shade
• Best for people who have seasickness
• More private due to lifeboats
• Gives you more close-up vibes of the sea
• Super easy to get on and off the ship
• It can be less expensive than normal balconies
• Enclosed nature and smaller openings might be issues for some people
• It can get wet and salty
• Some people might not like the shade and coverage
• Further from the action on-ship
• Balconies may be off-limits in bad weather and rough sea

Now it’s your call. If you like the pros, go for the Cove Balconies; otherwise, stick with the standard ones.

Does Cove Balconies Have WiFi?

Yes, Cove Balconies provide WiFi, but their location might affect internet speed since they’re on lower decks. 

The strength depends on the ship’s design and technology, so if internet speed matters to you and yours, check with Carnival to confirm before deciding.

When To Choose Cove Balconies?

Choosing Cove Balconies is all about personal preference. If you’re after a cozy, private, shady, and close space to the sea, Cove balcony rooms are your best bet. 

Just keep in mind that these balconies might be off-limits in bad weather and rough seas. I’d suggest avoiding Cove Balconies on cruises during hurricane season.

Do Cove Balconies Cost Less Than Regular Ones?

Yes, Cove Balconies are less expensive than standard balconies.

Is There A Risk Of Cove Balconies Being Off-Limits In Bad Weather?

Yes, access to Cove Balconies may be restricted in bad weather or rough seas for safety reasons.

Are Cove Balconies More Private Than Standard Balconies?

Cove Balconies offer extra privacy due to their lower deck location and steel railing.

Final Words

Cove Balconies are favored for being quieter, private, shady, and close to the ocean, making them a popular choice among people while planning their cruise.

However, the only thing that you must consider before booking is the weather conditions because these balconies may be off-limit during rough seas and bad weather. 

But if you’re looking for more private, shady, and cozy options, Cove Balconies are your go-to option.

I am Zoe Grace, a passionate enthusiast of cruise ships. With a decade of firsthand experience in the cruising industry, I have developed a deep understanding of the intricacies and wonders that these majestic vessels hold.

Now, I am excited to embark on a new journey as an author, sharing my knowledge and insights with readers who share my fascination for the world of cruising.

Join me as we explore the captivating world of cruise ships together.

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Home » Cruise » Windstar Cruises » Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite Review

Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite Review

We share all the details of a newly transformed Star Plus Class cabin in this Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite Review.

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During our recent Dreams of Tahiti cruise on Star Breeze, we stayed in a SBS1 suite on deck 6. How did this cabin measure up to the contemporary cruise lines? Well, we share all the details in our Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite Review.

Since we were guests of the cruise line on this sailing, our Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite, 631, was assigned to us. Reviewing the deck plans, this starboard side balcony cabin is located midship on deck 6, in the newly added block of the ship.

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While we have sailed with Windstar Cruises once before, it was on a Wind Class ship. Also, Star Breeze recently underwent a complete transformation as part of the $250 million Star Plus Initiative. This process included inserting a new 84 foot section to the ship.

This update added several behind the scenes upgrades as well as two new restaurants, a new pool, a re-imagined spa and fitness center, and 50 new suites.

So, as you can imagine, we were anxious to see this new Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite, our home away from home for the week.

Since Star Breeze only has six passenger decks (decks 3-8), our room was in close proximity to most public venues. With the main dining room on deck 3, the Compass Rose lounge on deck 6, and the outdoor areas including the pool on decks 7&8, we were never too far from the action.

While we didn’t need it much, our suite was also located very close to an elevator.

According to the cruise line’s website a Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite is 277 square feet in size. It also includes a French balcony. This is larger than most standard cabins on contemporary cruise lines and on par with our suite from a previous Viking cruise .

Further, all Windstar Cruises accommodations feature a queen-sized bed with luxury linens, an interactive TV, and premium L’Occitane bath amenities.

WATCH OUR STAR BALCONY CABIN TOUR AND REVIEW!

Layout of the Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite

At first glance, we were pleasantly surprised by this cabin. The suite offered an inviting seating area as you entered the room with the bed situated in the distance near the balcony.

Immediately upon entering this Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite, we were greeted by a large sitting area. This area contained two chairs with a small table in between as well as a loveseat and coffee table. The generously sized walk-in closet and bathroom were off to the right as well as the mini-bar.

Continuing through the sitting area, the bed area is separated by a curtain. Our queen-sized bed was on the aft wall (facing forward). On each side of the bed, there was a nightstand with 3 drawers, 2 outlets, and 2 USB outlets.

Across from the bed, there was the TV, three more large drawers for storage, and the vanity/desk area.

Finally, there was our balcony. While not the traditional mega-ship balcony with chairs and a table, this French balcony still allowed for fresh air and beautiful scenery.

Related Post: Why You Should Take Advantage of Windstar’s All-Inclusive Pricing

Inside Our Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite

The bathroom in our Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite was modern and elegant. While still a cruise ship bathroom, it was larger than typical.

The vanity area included double sinks with storage shelves below. There were also three small shelves off to one side for additional toiletries. The one item that is usually missing in cruise cabin bathrooms, and was also missing in this Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite, was liquid hand soap. Thankfully, we always bring our own now.

The shower, again, was larger in size than we have come to expect on a cruise ship. The elegant design continued with a glass door, neutral colored tiles, and stainless steel finishes.

There were large bottles of shampoo, conditioner, and body wash mounted to the wall; however, there was no shave bar. Most women appreciate cruise showers that have this bar.

Main Cabin Area

The walk-in closet offered more than enough storage for a week-long cruise. It consisted of 6 small shelves, a clothes bar with hangers, 3 drawers, and the safe. This is certainly an upgrade to your typical cruise ship closet.

In addition, Windstar Cruises provides bathrobes and slippers for all guests in their staterooms. 

In terms of the mini-bar, there were complimentary pitchers of water that were refilled daily by the stateroom attendant. Further, the mini-fridge is included in the Captain’s Exclusive drink package . This is a nice perk that is not typically the case on contemporary cruise lines.

There is also a cabinet above the mini-bar for glassware and some additional storage.

The sitting area was quite large, offering ample seating for 4 adults. There was also plenty of room to walk between the chairs on one side and the loveseat with coffee table on the other side.

The bed offered plenty of comfort during our trip. We had no issues falling asleep at night. The upgraded bedding and linens meant we were able to unwind each evening in comfort.

The desk and dresser area had plenty of counter space as well as a mirror. Admittedly, the desk did mostly serve as my vanity area for getting ready.

There were also 2 European outlets, 2 standard outlets, and 2 USB outlets. We are always thankful when a cruise cabin offers adequate outlets for charging all our devices!

Unfortunately, the balconies on Star Breeze are not your typical cruise cabin balcony. Rather, it is a French balcony. It does still provide access to fresh air and beautiful scenery. Further, there is enough room for one person to step out to take photos and such.

However, you will not find chairs or a table on this balcony. There is no space to enjoy a morning cup of coffee or breakfast on the balcony. Though, with a room as luxurious as this Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite, there is plenty of interior space to enjoy.

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Recap of Our Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite Review

Our suite on deck 6 was the ideal accommodations for our 7-day Tahiti cruise on the line’s newly transformed Star Breeze.

The bed was comfortable, and the suite itself was spacious. We particularly liked the upgraded bathroom, the walk-in closet, and the large seating area. There was also plenty of storage, and we appreciated the number of power outlets.

The cabin certainly had a more modern and upscale feel with a neutral color palette, subtle blue accents, and beachy wood tones.

Overall, we would highly recommend this Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite regardless of the cruise itinerary.

Have you sailed in a Windstar Cruises Star Balcony Suite? What is your preferred stateroom category when you cruise? Drop us an anchor below with your review of the cabins on Windstar Cruises Star Plus Class ships.

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DB & The Princess

Welcome Aboard! We are Don and Heidi, the husband and wife travel team behind EatSleepCruise.com. We took our first cruise vacation together 13 years ago and have been hooked ever since. Follow along as we share our travel tips, cruise reviews, information on ports of call, and the latest cruise news to help you plan the ultimate cruise vacation. Are you ready to embark on your journey to “sea the world, one port at a time”?

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What Do Cruise Ship Balconies Require to Be Child Safe?

Want to ensure your kid’s safety on a cruise ship balcony? Read on to know more about ways you can do so.

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Balcony staterooms are considered to be the best for families. The absolute pleasure of spotting marine wildlife and watching sunsets from the comfort of your balcony is an exclusive experience. The balconies also add an extra advantage if you’re traveling with kids since they open up spaces for them to play and spend time. While you may enjoy all the joys of booking a balcony cabin or stateroom , you may find yourself in a constant fear of your kid facing possible risks. 

The following points must be kept in mind to ensure the safety of your kids while booking a stateroom with a balcony:

A) Check for necessary arrangements in your balcony stateroom:

While booking a balcony stateroom , make sure that it is equipped with safety precautions that may curb any accidents or mishaps. Kid-friendly cruise lines prioritize the safety of their younger guests by adding safety elements to the cruise ship balconies.

• Heavy balcony doors: Balcony staterooms in most luxury cruise lines have heavy sliding glass doors in steel frames. The doors are usually hard to open. This prevents toddlers and younger children from having access to balconies without the presence of adults. 
• Child safety lock feature: The doors to the balcony in a stateroom often come with two locks; one of them is a child safety lock located at the top of the glass door. 
• Tall railings and walls: The walls and railings on most of the cruise ship balconies are at least 42 inches high. The height makes it a challenge for kids to climb over the railings. The railings are also sturdy enough to avoid any damage inflicted by people.

B) Precautions for adults with kids in a balcony stateroom:

While booking accommodation with balcony access on a cruise ship, adults also must follow certain precautions to keep their kids safe.

• Keep your kids under close supervision: You must keep a close check on kids when they’re playing on the balcony. Accompany toddlers and younger children on the balcony as they tend to climb over raised platforms. Adults must explain to kids about their safety and list out certain rules while on a cruise ship balcony. 
• Keep balcony furniture at a safe distance: Cruise ship balconies are usually furnished with sitting areas. If you’re concerned with your kid climbing the furniture, ask stateroom attendants to remove them from the balcony railing. 

C) Choosing the right cruise line with secure balconies:

Some of the respected cruise lines worldwide include suitable staterooms to accommodate families. They also incorporate arrangements for balconies that are safe for kids .

• Disney Cruise Line: The cruise line is known for providing a range of kid-friendly entertainment and activities. The balcony rooms at Disney Cruises feature private balcony doors with kid-proof locks and plexiglass railings. The exclusive Family Verandah Rooms of the cruise line include expanded balconies that are exceptionally spacious for kids.
• MSC Cruises: MSC Cruises are known to provide a range of accommodations, which include cabins, duplex, and studio rooms. The family cabin of MSC Cruises majorly includes two balconies, completed with elements to ensure child safety. You can choose from various family cabins on these cruise ships according to your preferences.
• Royal Caribbean International: The cruise line offers various types of luxurious staterooms that are equally safe for kids. You can find options from standard cabins to suites that feature balconies. Each balcony at a Royal Caribbean cruise is built with safety elements. The balcony doors contain a manual lock at a satisfactory height, away from younger kids.
• Carnival Cruise Line: Carnival Cruises are highly preferred by families. The cruise ships offer exciting programs that allow kids to socialize and learn new skills. It also offers a range of accommodations that are kid-friendly. The balcony staterooms feature childproof balcony doors, along with solid, thick walls.

Also Read:  What are kid activities on a cruise?

Conclusion: 

Balcony staterooms on a cruise ship allow parents to spend great quality time with their kids. The privacy of these balconies allows kids to play and interact with their families freely. Both parents and the cruise line must ensure the safety of kids on a cruise ship balcony. You must look for cruise lines that provide kid-friendly balconies , which may include sturdy balcony doors, child safety locks, and sturdy railings.

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Everything you need to know about MSC Cruises cabins and suites

A relative newcomer in the North American market, MSC Cruises is equal parts elegant and kitschy. The line tends to appeal to a wide swath of cruisers, from Europeans who like to party into the wee hours of the morning to American families who book because of affordable fares and "kids sail free" pricing.

To satisfy its diverse passenger base, MSC offers accommodations to fit all types of travelers. Rooms include inexpensive inside cabins that sleep two people, midlevel staterooms with windows and balconies, and high-end suites that offer cruisers with larger budgets a private oasis in the form of the MSC Yacht Club .

A variety of connecting rooms and cabins with extra bunks accommodate larger groups and families who wish to share space.

Because your cruise cabin will be your home away from home for several days, it's important to book one that fits your needs. That's especially true if you're sharing it with several people.

Whether you're looking at an inside cabin for a cruise with friends, balcony accommodations for you and your significant other or a suite for your family, here TPG breaks down what you can expect when you book a room on one of MSC's ships.

For more cruise news, reviews and tips, sign up for TPG's cruise newsletter .

MSC Cruises cabin primer

MSC Cruises has become one of the fastest-growing lines in the cruise industry, with about two dozen ships in its fleet. The vessels fall into six classes : Lirica, Musica, Fantasia, Meraviglia, Seaside and World.

Although cabin offerings can vary from ship to ship and class to class, the standard types remain the same: inside, outside, balcony and suite.

Additionally, you'll find the same basic amenities in each room, unless otherwise noted below. They include two twin beds that can be joined to form a queen- or king-size bed; an in-cabin bathroom with a shower, a sink, a toilet and basic soap, shower gel and shampoo; a couple of nightstands; a chair or sofa; a desk/vanity; a closet; a safe; a hair dryer; a minifridge; a phone; USB outlets and a selection of both North American and European outlets.

On all ships except MSC Lirica, MSC Opera, MSC Sinfonia and MSC Armonia, you'll also find an interactive TV that allows you to view the daily schedule, check your onboard account and choose from a selection of live TV programs and movies.

Twice-daily room tidying is provided by a room steward assigned to each cabin, and room service is available throughout the day for an added fee.

One confusing aspect of MSC's bookings is that you'll have to select an experience package in addition to a cabin type. Package tiers determine things like your ability to choose a specific cabin and preferred dining time and whether you'll receive welcome amenities in your room. Certain cabin types are only available in conjunction with certain package experiences and vice versa. Those are noted in each respective section below.

Accessible cabins , including accommodations for wheelchair users, are available on every ship in MSC's fleet. In addition to more space, they feature wider doorways and lowered sinks and toilets in the bathrooms, as well as grab bars.

MSC Cruises' experience packages

Here's what you get when you book each of MSC's three experience packages, which determine the perks you'll receive on your sailing.

• Accommodations
• Complimentary food in the dining room and buffet
• Broadway-style theater entertainment
• Access to the onboard gym, pool and kids club
• MSC Voyagers Club points
• One for-fee change to your cruise booking (with some restrictions)
• Drink package discount at time of booking
• All Bella perks
• Choice of specific cabin and location
• One free change to your cruise booking (with some restrictions)
• Ability to choose between early and late seating for dinner
• Room service (complimentary for breakfast, but fees apply for other meals)
• Discount on pre-cruise specialty dining package
• All Fantastica and Bella perks
• Flexible My Choice dining, which lets you eat at any time you choose between set hours
• Free 24-hour room service delivery
• Pillow menu
• A welcome package, including Prosecco and chocolates
• Complimentary access to your ship's solarium and thermal area
• A 10% discount on all spa treatments purchased on board
• Special Balinese massage offer when booked pre-cruise
• Complimentary use of bathrobe and slippers
• Priority boarding and luggage drop-off

Inside cabins on MSC Cruises ships

Inside cabins — rooms with no windows — are available on all ships in the MSC fleet. Ranging from 140 to 301 square feet (depending on the ship), they make for great sleeping because they're so dark. They're also ideal for passengers who are on a budget.

In addition to the standard amenities mentioned above, they provide room for anywhere from two to four passengers to sleep. (Rooms that sleep more than two feature bunks that pull down from the ceiling.)

These cabins are available with the line's Bella and Fantastica experiences.

If you're sailing solo, some MSC vessels offer cabins for one outfitted with a twin bed that converts into a couch. These interior studio accommodations are only available with the Bella package on MSC Meraviglia , MSC Bellissima and the line's World Class ships.

Ocean-view cabins on MSC Cruises ships

Ocean-view rooms are similar to insides in that they provide basic amenities — but with a view.

Offering 129 to 269 square feet of space (depending on the specific ship and ocean-view category), these staterooms allow you to see outside through a porthole or a window that doesn't open.

MSC's outside cabins are available to passengers who book Bella and Fantastica packages.

Additionally, if you're traveling with your family or another group, several of MSC Cruises' ships — particularly those in the Meraviglia and Seaside classes — feature space for as many as 10 passengers via a series of connecting rooms. Options are available at the ocean-view and balcony levels.

Balcony cabins on MSC Cruises ships

You might be surprised to discover that most of MSC Cruises' balcony cabins provide less interior square footage than what's available in inside or ocean-view staterooms.

Balcony rooms run anywhere from 129 to 205 square feet, but their key feature is, of course, a private balcony, which does add an extra 32 to 129 square feet, depending on the vessel and specific type of balcony room booked. These cabins are bookable in conjunction with MSC's Bella, Fantastica and Aurea experiences.

Although balcony cabins offer upgraded amenities, including MSC's brand of hand lotion and toiletries, they are largely the same as inside and ocean-view accommodations.

MSC's newest ships — including those in the Meraviglia, Seaside and World Classes — house connecting balcony rooms that can sleep up to 10 in the same group traveling together.

Additionally, on its World Class ships, the line has introduced inward-facing balconies, similar to the ones Royal Caribbean pioneered in 2009 with the debut of its Oasis Class vessels . On World Europa, for example, they overlook the ship's promenade, offering views of the activity below, rather than the ocean.

MSC Cruises suites

All ships in MSC's fleet have suites that can be booked as part of the Fantastica and Aurea packages, but it's Aurea that offers the largest number of perks, as outlined above.

The several types of suites vary by ship in terms of size and amenities. Some come with balconies, while others only offer floor-to-ceiling panoramic windows.

Junior Suites

Although this room type is listed as a suite, it's essentially a balcony cabin with a bit more space — 183 square feet of interior accommodation with a balcony that ranges from 140 to 183 square feet.

Standard suites include rooms with huge balconies larger than the cabin's interior space and ones with private whirlpool tubs. They run from 269 to 355 square feet, with balconies measuring 32 to 409 square feet.

Grand Suites

Coming in between 377 and 420 square feet, with balconies spanning from 32 to 495 square feet, Grand Suites — found on Seaside and World Class ships — come in two types. They include standard one-bedroom Grand Suites, as well as two-bedroom varieties.

The latter has one bedroom with a queen-size bed and another with two twins. It sleeps up to five passengers and offers two bathrooms — one with a shower and the other with a bathtub.

While most suites are designed for double occupancy, some suite accommodations on MSC Bellissima, MSC Grandiosa, MSC Virtuosa and MSC Magnifica can sleep up to five people.

MSC Yacht Club suites on MSC ships

All cabins located in the MSC Yacht Club — an exclusive, gated area on select ships — are called suites, even the smallest and least expensive, which don't have windows or balconies.

Yacht Club suite types range from insides to two-deck duplexes, all of which come with butler and concierge services, luxuriously appointed furnishings (such as real marble finishes, memory foam mattresses and Egyptian cotton sheets) and access to members-only restaurants, bars (alcohol is free there), lounges, pools and sun decks.

The Yacht Club features seven different types of rooms. Ships that have the MSC Yacht Club on board include MSC Bellissima, MSC Divina, MSC Fantasia, MSC Grandiosa, MSC Meraviglia, MSC Preziosa, MSC Seaside, MSC Seascape, MSC Seaview, MSC Seashore, MSC Splendida, MSC Virtuosa and MSC World Europa.

Note: Not all Yacht Clubs have the same suite types available.

MSC Yacht Club Interior Suites

Although these 161- to 226-square-foot cabins don't offer a view or fresh air, they are elegantly decorated and include all the Yacht Club benefits mentioned above.

MSC Yacht Club Deluxe Suites

These Yacht Club digs are the equivalent of a balcony cabin — but in a dedicated area that includes all the exclusive perks. They run 236 to 366 square feet and have balconies ranging from 54 to 86 square feet, so they also come with a bit more space, both inside and outdoors.

MSC Yacht Club Deluxe Grand Suites

Similarly, Deluxe Grand Suites are like the Yacht Club equivalent of booking a Grand Suite with more perks. Depending on the ship, they offer anywhere from 269 to 463 square feet of space, plus 65- to 129-square-foot balconies. Some Grand Suites also have two bedrooms instead of one. Further, these rooms on Seaside Class ships include bathrooms with bathtubs, as well as separate living areas.

MSC Yacht Club Duplex Suites

Rising two decks, MSC's duplex staterooms measure 495 to 635 square feet and come with 65- to 334-square-foot balconies. They feature living rooms with two-person sofa beds downstairs and master bedrooms upstairs, which also sleep two passengers.

Each of these accommodations comes complete with two walk-in closets and two bathrooms — one with a bathtub and one with a shower. Most duplexes on Meraviglia and World Class ships also have their own private whirlpool tubs.

MSC Yacht Club Executive and Family Suites

The line's Executive and Family Suites, available only on Fantasia Class vessels, are an excellent choice for anyone who wants to stay in the Yacht Club with a family or other group of more than two people.

This option, which is one type of suite (despite its confusing name), has space for up to five cruisers via a combination of bunk beds, sofa beds and beds that pull down from the ceiling, depending on the ship. The suites clock in at around 431 to 549 square feet, depending on the vessel.

The only drawback is that these staterooms have no balconies and no in-room dining areas, but they do include all the perks you'd find in Yacht Club cabins.

MSC Yacht Club Royal Suites

Although they only occupy one level, at 388 to 667 square feet, MSC's Yacht Club Royal Suites are right up there with the Duplex Suites in terms of space. They offer the second-largest amount of square footage after the Owner's Suites. They come with huge balconies comprising 355 to 753 square feet of outdoor area.

Additionally, bathrooms in these suites offer bathtubs on Fantasia, Meraviglia, Seaside and World Class ships, and the latter three have private whirlpool tubs, as well. All four classes' Royal Suites also include separate living room areas.

MSC Yacht Club Owner's Suites

The largest and most impressive of all MSC's cabins are the Owner's Suites found in the Yacht Club. Offering an impressive 840 to 1,119 square feet — larger than some land-based apartments — plus 269- to 670-square-foot balconies, they're some of the most luxurious rooms afloat.

Specific amenities vary by ship, but as an example, Owner's Suites on MSC World Europa offer floor-to-ceiling windows and walk-in closets. These accommodations on both the line's Seaside and World Class vessels also feature bathrooms with separate showers and bathtubs, as well as private whirlpool tubs and separate living room areas.

Bottom line

Although MSC Cruises' cabin types are straightforward, the line's add-on experiences can complicate things a bit.

Overall, what's key to remember is that MSC Cruises offers a wide variety of rooms and pricing to meet just about any budget or style of cruising. Each ship will offer accommodation choices from the least expensive, bare-bones interior rooms to the priciest suites, which come with butler and concierge services.

When you sail with MSC Cruises, you can expect function, style and comfort, regardless of the cabin type you book.

Planning a cruise? Start with these stories:

• The 5 most desirable cabin locations on any cruise ship
• A beginners guide to picking a cruise line
• The 8 worst cabin locations on any cruise ship
• The ultimate guide to what to pack for a cruise
• A quick guide to the most popular cruise lines
• 21 tips and tricks that will make your cruise go smoothly
• Top ways cruisers waste money
• The ultimate guide to choosing a cruise ship cabin

Editorial disclaimer: Opinions expressed here are the author’s alone, not those of any bank, credit card issuer, airline or hotel chain, and have not been reviewed, approved or otherwise endorsed by any of these entities.

• Ask a Cruise Question

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By bearswife , December 2, 2007 in Ask a Cruise Question

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I know that the ships camera's are all over the place, however, I now hear that they can see you on you private balcony. Is this true? I guess its not that private but it is your own for the week. Are they able to see you? Anyone know? I go out in my pj's etc, I don't want to be watched lol....not a pretty site:D

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I have never heard of nor seen a balcony camera. But I'm not posotive. That would be kind of wrong though.

Yes, I agree. However, with all the stories about flicking cigarettes overboard I might wonder? Maybe other reasons but I would be unfordable.

I can't figure out where they would put the BalconyVision camera where you would not see it. I also have a hard time believing the cruise line would spend the money for such cameras plus the monitors, wiring/transmitters, plus the salaries of people to watch them.

I just want to know if its true or not. Anyone know????:confused:

They probably have cameras that view down the sides of the ship (in case of jumpers) but not directly into your balcony

cruise_lover

  NO it is not true. Another urban legend started by someone who has nothing better to do. There is no place to place a camera that would be directed at a balcony.     Believe only half of what you see and nothing of what you hear.

Thank you. I was upset hearing that. Have a great cruise. P.s. I hope you are correct lol.....thanks again!

They are NOT watching your balcony with cameras--but, your neighbor can certainly "peek" around the divider and see you! Don't do anything out there you don't want someone to see!

And if they can't see you, they can definitely hear you.

Darn, does this mean i shouldnt get "busy" on my Balcony? :eek:

Only if you don't want witnesses.;)

This reminds me of a discussion on the Disney boards a while back when we stayed at Animal Kingdom Lodge, where they have wild animals roaming the grounds. The balconies overlook the savannah in the U-shaped building. Reports were there were cameras on the buildings aimed at the balconies to monitor anybody tossing food or debris that could injure the animals. The advice was "close your drapes" if you planned on doing anything you would not want some security guard to see. Now that's a security camera to worry about!

NO it is not true. Another urban legend started by someone who has nothing better to do. There is no place to place a camera that would be directed at a balcony.

Actually, I'll disagree with this. Now, cameras aren't pointed at individual balconies, and quite frankly, I doubt they could make much detail out on what's going on on the balconies, but at least some of the balconies can indeed be at least partially seen by security cameras. (I've only ever had aft balconies, and I don't think on Princess' Grand class ships the aft cabins have any way to be viewed by cameras, but I *think* the side ones are under observation. However, ships with an aft that slants in as you go up certain can have balconies that are partially observed by cameras (with Princess, I know for a fact that the R-class ships have them, wouldn't surprise me if the Sun class ships do too). Standing on my balcony on the aft of the Royal Princess I could look up the back of the ship and see a camera that clearly would be able to observe where I was standing.

(And of course, side balconies can also be observed from the bridge wings, although the farther back you are the less that would be able to be made out.)

.....you know those signs on trucks that say if you can't see my mirrors.....I can't see you.....;)

well......if you can see the bridge......they can see you....and I would assume there are security cameras (for fire and security) that are not "advertized".....:)

latterdayesther

We took a bridge tour on the Regal and all the side balconies could be and were moinitored 24/7. We assume that this is a safety issue. Don't do anything on your balcony that you wouldn't do in public! ;)

Cameras on YOUR ship aren't the only ones to consider. If you are in port with a Crystal ship, they have WONDERFUL bridge cams, forward, port and starboard. Ships with bridge cams docked behind your ship might see your aft balcony. Also, there are some port cams that can get a good view of your balcony, some are controllable and can be zoomed. they also move around the Panama Canal Miraflores cam, and can get pretty good balcony views. EM

Why would anyone have a presumption of complete privacy on a balcony. Hey.... you are outside.

Now I am the one who is worried :) - I never thought of the corner balconies and the balconies that can see the bridge - like we did on our last cruise.

Guess I better watch out what I am doing on my balcony. No more sun bathing :o for me.

So true, the NSA could be lurking down from one of their spy satellites up in space.

Now I am the one who is worried :) - I never thought of the corner balconies and the balconies that can see the bridge - like we did on our last cruise.   Guess I better watch out what I am doing on my balcony. No more sun bathing :o for me.

Nothing wrong with sun bathing. Now, if it is in the nude...:eek: then some comments may be said up at the bridge.:D

I don't know but I have seen posts of people who had seen their neghbors making whoopee, you know like the balcony below them etc.

I certainly would do nothing I wanted to be private on a balcony.

I do know some people do not care if they are seen.

RetireeWannabee

On my last cruise, we had a clear view of the bridge, so they of course had a clear view of us. I wasn't too worried about it, as i wasn't going to be doing any nude sunbathing in Alaska...

even if there are cameras, they would prob'ly be ALL BALCONIES and even if there was a person monitoring, holy crap, that's a lot to keep track of!!!

so I doubt it, but even if they did it, I wouldn't spend any time worrying about it as I doubt anyone would be zeroing in on my boring activities.

Eh, I figure that anybody monitoring balcony cameras has seen it all before and will see it again. Until you start seeing the videos on YouTube, I wouldn't worry about it. :)

I guess that depends on the person. I don't care if they have "seen it all"-I still do not want them to see me-so no I will not stand around nude or have sex on my balcony- and as far as youtube-if a person is stupid enough to expose themselves then they should not complain it was posted on youtube. They put themselves in that situation.

Only if a person was filmed by hidden camera and they had no knowlege would they have a right to complain.

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Crying Myself to Sleep on the Biggest Cruise Ship Ever

Seven agonizing nights aboard the Icon of the Seas

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Updated at 2:44 p.m. ET on April 6, 2024.

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MY FIRST GLIMPSE of Royal Caribbean’s Icon of the Seas, from the window of an approaching Miami cab, brings on a feeling of vertigo, nausea, amazement, and distress. I shut my eyes in defense, as my brain tells my optic nerve to try again.

The ship makes no sense, vertically or horizontally. It makes no sense on sea, or on land, or in outer space. It looks like a hodgepodge of domes and minarets, tubes and canopies, like Istanbul had it been designed by idiots. Vibrant, oversignifying colors are stacked upon other such colors, decks perched over still more decks; the only comfort is a row of lifeboats ringing its perimeter. There is no imposed order, no cogent thought, and, for those who do not harbor a totalitarian sense of gigantomania, no visual mercy. This is the biggest cruise ship ever built, and I have been tasked with witnessing its inaugural voyage.

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“Author embarks on their first cruise-ship voyage” has been a staple of American essay writing for almost three decades, beginning with David Foster Wallace’s “A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again,” which was first published in 1996 under the title “Shipping Out.” Since then, many admirable writers have widened and diversified the genre. Usually the essayist commissioned to take to the sea is in their first or second flush of youth and is ready to sharpen their wit against the hull of the offending vessel. I am 51, old and tired, having seen much of the world as a former travel journalist, and mostly what I do in both life and prose is shrug while muttering to my imaginary dachshund, “This too shall pass.” But the Icon of the Seas will not countenance a shrug. The Icon of the Seas is the Linda Loman of cruise ships, exclaiming that attention must be paid. And here I am in late January with my one piece of luggage and useless gray winter jacket and passport, zipping through the Port of Miami en route to the gangway that will separate me from the bulk of North America for more than seven days, ready to pay it in full.

The aforementioned gangway opens up directly onto a thriving mall (I will soon learn it is imperiously called the “Royal Promenade”), presently filled with yapping passengers beneath a ceiling studded with balloons ready to drop. Crew members from every part of the global South, as well as a few Balkans, are shepherding us along while pressing flutes of champagne into our hands. By a humming Starbucks, I drink as many of these as I can and prepare to find my cabin. I show my blue Suite Sky SeaPass Card (more on this later, much more) to a smiling woman from the Philippines, and she tells me to go “aft.” Which is where, now? As someone who has rarely sailed on a vessel grander than the Staten Island Ferry, I am confused. It turns out that the aft is the stern of the ship, or, for those of us who don’t know what a stern or an aft are, its ass. The nose of the ship, responsible for separating the waves before it, is also called a bow, and is marked for passengers as the FWD , or forward. The part of the contemporary sailing vessel where the malls are clustered is called the midship. I trust that you have enjoyed this nautical lesson.

I ascend via elevator to my suite on Deck 11. This is where I encounter my first terrible surprise. My suite windows and balcony do not face the ocean. Instead, they look out onto another shopping mall. This mall is the one that’s called Central Park, perhaps in homage to the Olmsted-designed bit of greenery in the middle of my hometown. Although on land I would be delighted to own a suite with Central Park views, here I am deeply depressed. To sail on a ship and not wake up to a vast blue carpet of ocean? Unthinkable.

Allow me a brief preamble here. The story you are reading was commissioned at a moment when most staterooms on the Icon were sold out. In fact, so enthralled by the prospect of this voyage were hard-core mariners that the ship’s entire inventory of guest rooms (the Icon can accommodate up to 7,600 passengers, but its inaugural journey was reduced to 5,000 or so for a less crowded experience) was almost immediately sold out. Hence, this publication was faced with the shocking prospect of paying nearly $19,000 to procure for this solitary passenger an entire suite—not including drinking expenses—all for the privilege of bringing you this article. But the suite in question doesn’t even have a view of the ocean! I sit down hard on my soft bed. Nineteen thousand dollars for this .

The viewless suite does have its pluses. In addition to all the Malin+Goetz products in my dual bathrooms, I am granted use of a dedicated Suite Deck lounge; access to Coastal Kitchen, a superior restaurant for Suites passengers; complimentary VOOM SM Surf & Stream (“the fastest Internet at Sea”) “for one device per person for the whole cruise duration”; a pair of bathrobes (one of which comes prestained with what looks like a large expectoration by the greenest lizard on Earth); and use of the Grove Suite Sun, an area on Decks 18 and 19 with food and deck chairs reserved exclusively for Suite passengers. I also get reserved seating for a performance of The Wizard of Oz , an ice-skating tribute to the periodic table, and similar provocations. The very color of my Suite Sky SeaPass Card, an oceanic blue as opposed to the cloying royal purple of the standard non-Suite passenger, will soon provoke envy and admiration. But as high as my status may be, there are those on board who have much higher status still, and I will soon learn to bow before them.

In preparation for sailing, I have “priced in,” as they say on Wall Street, the possibility that I may come from a somewhat different monde than many of the other cruisers. Without falling into stereotypes or preconceptions, I prepare myself for a friendly outspokenness on the part of my fellow seafarers that may not comply with modern DEI standards. I believe in meeting people halfway, and so the day before flying down to Miami, I visited what remains of Little Italy to purchase a popular T-shirt that reads DADDY’S LITTLE MEATBALL across the breast in the colors of the Italian flag. My wife recommended that I bring one of my many T-shirts featuring Snoopy and the Peanuts gang, as all Americans love the beagle and his friends. But I naively thought that my meatball T-shirt would be more suitable for conversation-starting. “Oh, and who is your ‘daddy’?” some might ask upon seeing it. “And how long have you been his ‘little meatball’?” And so on.

I put on my meatball T-shirt and head for one of the dining rooms to get a late lunch. In the elevator, I stick out my chest for all to read the funny legend upon it, but soon I realize that despite its burnished tricolor letters, no one takes note. More to the point, no one takes note of me. Despite my attempts at bridge building, the very sight of me (small, ethnic, without a cap bearing the name of a football team) elicits no reaction from other passengers. Most often, they will small-talk over me as if I don’t exist. This brings to mind the travails of David Foster Wallace , who felt so ostracized by his fellow passengers that he retreated to his cabin for much of his voyage. And Wallace was raised primarily in the Midwest and was a much larger, more American-looking meatball than I am. If he couldn’t talk to these people, how will I? What if I leave this ship without making any friends at all, despite my T-shirt? I am a social creature, and the prospect of seven days alone and apart is saddening. Wallace’s stateroom, at least, had a view of the ocean, a kind of cheap eternity.

Worse awaits me in the dining room. This is a large, multichandeliered room where I attended my safety training (I was shown how to put on a flotation vest; it is a very simple procedure). But the maître d’ politely refuses me entry in an English that seems to verge on another language. “I’m sorry, this is only for pendejos ,” he seems to be saying. I push back politely and he repeats himself. Pendejos ? Piranhas? There’s some kind of P-word to which I am not attuned. Meanwhile elderly passengers stream right past, powered by their limbs, walkers, and electric wheelchairs. “It is only pendejo dining today, sir.” “But I have a suite!” I say, already starting to catch on to the ship’s class system. He examines my card again. “But you are not a pendejo ,” he confirms. I am wearing a DADDY’S LITTLE MEATBALL T-shirt, I want to say to him. I am the essence of pendejo .

Eventually, I give up and head to the plebeian buffet on Deck 15, which has an aquatic-styled name I have now forgotten. Before gaining entry to this endless cornucopia of reheated food, one passes a washing station of many sinks and soap dispensers, and perhaps the most intriguing character on the entire ship. He is Mr. Washy Washy—or, according to his name tag, Nielbert of the Philippines—and he is dressed as a taco (on other occasions, I’ll see him dressed as a burger). Mr. Washy Washy performs an eponymous song in spirited, indeed flamboyant English: “Washy, washy, wash your hands, WASHY WASHY!” The dangers of norovirus and COVID on a cruise ship this size (a giant fellow ship was stricken with the former right after my voyage) makes Mr. Washy Washy an essential member of the crew. The problem lies with the food at the end of Washy’s rainbow. The buffet is groaning with what sounds like sophisticated dishes—marinated octopus, boiled egg with anchovy, chorizo, lobster claws—but every animal tastes tragically the same, as if there was only one creature available at the market, a “cruisipus” bred specifically for Royal Caribbean dining. The “vegetables” are no better. I pick up a tomato slice and look right through it. It tastes like cellophane. I sit alone, apart from the couples and parents with gaggles of children, as “We Are Family” echoes across the buffet space.

I may have failed to mention that all this time, the Icon of the Seas has not left port. As the fiery mango of the subtropical setting sun makes Miami’s condo skyline even more apocalyptic, the ship shoves off beneath a perfunctory display of fireworks. After the sun sets, in the far, dark distance, another circus-lit cruise ship ruptures the waves before us. We glance at it with pity, because it is by definition a smaller ship than our own. I am on Deck 15, outside the buffet and overlooking a bunch of pools (the Icon has seven of them), drinking a frilly drink that I got from one of the bars (the Icon has 15 of them), still too shy to speak to anyone, despite Sister Sledge’s assertion that all on the ship are somehow related.

Kim Brooks: On failing the family vacation

The ship’s passage away from Ron DeSantis’s Florida provides no frisson, no sense of developing “sea legs,” as the ship is too large to register the presence of waves unless a mighty wind adds significant chop. It is time for me to register the presence of the 5,000 passengers around me, even if they refuse to register mine. My fellow travelers have prepared for this trip with personally decorated T-shirts celebrating the importance of this voyage. The simplest ones say ICON INAUGURAL ’24 on the back and the family name on the front. Others attest to an over-the-top love of cruise ships: WARNING! MAY START TALKING ABOUT CRUISING . Still others are artisanally designed and celebrate lifetimes spent married while cruising (on ships, of course). A couple possibly in their 90s are wearing shirts whose backs feature a drawing of a cruise liner, two flamingos with ostensibly male and female characteristics, and the legend “ HUSBAND AND WIFE Cruising Partners FOR LIFE WE MAY NOT HAVE IT All Together BUT TOGETHER WE HAVE IT ALL .” (The words not in all caps have been written in cursive.) A real journalist or a more intrepid conversationalist would have gone up to the couple and asked them to explain the longevity of their marriage vis-à-vis their love of cruising. But instead I head to my mall suite, take off my meatball T-shirt, and allow the first tears of the cruise to roll down my cheeks slowly enough that I briefly fall asleep amid the moisture and salt.

I WAKE UP with a hangover. Oh God. Right. I cannot believe all of that happened last night. A name floats into my cobwebbed, nauseated brain: “Ayn Rand.” Jesus Christ.

I breakfast alone at the Coastal Kitchen. The coffee tastes fine and the eggs came out of a bird. The ship rolls slightly this morning; I can feel it in my thighs and my schlong, the parts of me that are most receptive to danger.

I had a dangerous conversation last night. After the sun set and we were at least 50 miles from shore (most modern cruise ships sail at about 23 miles an hour), I lay in bed softly hiccupping, my arms stretched out exactly like Jesus on the cross, the sound of the distant waves missing from my mall-facing suite, replaced by the hum of air-conditioning and children shouting in Spanish through the vents of my two bathrooms. I decided this passivity was unacceptable. As an immigrant, I feel duty-bound to complete the tasks I am paid for, which means reaching out and trying to understand my fellow cruisers. So I put on a normal James Perse T-shirt and headed for one of the bars on the Royal Promenade—the Schooner Bar, it was called, if memory serves correctly.

I sat at the bar for a martini and two Negronis. An old man with thick, hairy forearms drank next to me, very silent and Hemingwaylike, while a dreadlocked piano player tinkled out a series of excellent Elton John covers. To my right, a young white couple—he in floral shorts, she in a light, summery miniskirt with a fearsome diamond ring, neither of them in football regalia—chatted with an elderly couple. Do it , I commanded myself. Open your mouth. Speak! Speak without being spoken to. Initiate. A sentence fragment caught my ear from the young woman, “Cherry Hill.” This is a suburb of Philadelphia in New Jersey, and I had once been there for a reading at a synagogue. “Excuse me,” I said gently to her. “Did you just mention Cherry Hill? It’s a lovely place.”

As it turned out, the couple now lived in Fort Lauderdale (the number of Floridians on the cruise surprised me, given that Southern Florida is itself a kind of cruise ship, albeit one slowly sinking), but soon they were talking with me exclusively—the man potbellied, with a chin like a hard-boiled egg; the woman as svelte as if she were one of the many Ukrainian members of the crew—the elderly couple next to them forgotten. This felt as groundbreaking as the first time I dared to address an American in his native tongue, as a child on a bus in Queens (“On my foot you are standing, Mister”).

“I don’t want to talk politics,” the man said. “But they’re going to eighty-six Biden and put Michelle in.”

I considered the contradictions of his opening conversational gambit, but decided to play along. “People like Michelle,” I said, testing the waters. The husband sneered, but the wife charitably put forward that the former first lady was “more personable” than Joe Biden. “They’re gonna eighty-six Biden,” the husband repeated. “He can’t put a sentence together.”

After I mentioned that I was a writer—though I presented myself as a writer of teleplays instead of novels and articles such as this one—the husband told me his favorite writer was Ayn Rand. “Ayn Rand, she came here with nothing,” the husband said. “I work with a lot of Cubans, so …” I wondered if I should mention what I usually do to ingratiate myself with Republicans or libertarians: the fact that my finances improved after pass-through corporations were taxed differently under Donald Trump. Instead, I ordered another drink and the couple did the same, and I told him that Rand and I were born in the same city, St. Petersburg/Leningrad, and that my family also came here with nothing. Now the bonding and drinking began in earnest, and several more rounds appeared. Until it all fell apart.

Read: Gary Shteyngart on watching Russian television for five days straight

My new friend, whom I will refer to as Ayn, called out to a buddy of his across the bar, and suddenly a young couple, both covered in tattoos, appeared next to us. “He fucking punked me,” Ayn’s frat-boy-like friend called out as he put his arm around Ayn, while his sizable partner sizzled up to Mrs. Rand. Both of them had a look I have never seen on land—their eyes projecting absence and enmity in equal measure. In the ’90s, I drank with Russian soldiers fresh from Chechnya and wandered the streets of wartime Zagreb, but I have never seen such undisguised hostility toward both me and perhaps the universe at large. I was briefly introduced to this psychopathic pair, but neither of them wanted to have anything to do with me, and the tattooed woman would not even reveal her Christian name to me (she pretended to have the same first name as Mrs. Rand). To impress his tattooed friends, Ayn made fun of the fact that as a television writer, I’d worked on the series Succession (which, it would turn out, practically nobody on the ship had watched), instead of the far more palatable, in his eyes, zombie drama of last year. And then my new friends drifted away from me into an angry private conversation—“He punked me!”—as I ordered another drink for myself, scared of the dead-eyed arrivals whose gaze never registered in the dim wattage of the Schooner Bar, whose terrifying voices and hollow laughs grated like unoiled gears against the crooning of “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.”

But today is a new day for me and my hangover. After breakfast, I explore the ship’s so-called neighborhoods . There’s the AquaDome, where one can find a food hall and an acrobatic sound-and-light aquatic show. Central Park has a premium steak house, a sushi joint, and a used Rolex that can be bought for $8,000 on land here proudly offered at $17,000. There’s the aforementioned Royal Promenade, where I had drunk with the Rands, and where a pair of dueling pianos duel well into the night. There’s Surfside, a kids’ neighborhood full of sugary garbage, which looks out onto the frothy trail that the behemoth leaves behind itself. Thrill Island refers to the collection of tubes that clutter the ass of the ship and offer passengers six waterslides and a surfing simulation. There’s the Hideaway, an adult zone that plays music from a vomit-slathered, Brit-filled Alicante nightclub circa 1996 and proves a big favorite with groups of young Latin American customers. And, most hurtfully, there’s the Suite Neighborhood.

I say hurtfully because as a Suite passenger I should be here, though my particular suite is far from the others. Whereas I am stuck amid the riffraff of Deck 11, this section is on the highborn Decks 16 and 17, and in passing, I peek into the spacious, tall-ceilinged staterooms from the hallway, dazzled by the glint of the waves and sun. For $75,000, one multifloor suite even comes with its own slide between floors, so that a family may enjoy this particular terror in private. There is a quiet splendor to the Suite Neighborhood. I see fewer stickers and signs and drawings than in my own neighborhood—for example, MIKE AND DIANA PROUDLY SERVED U.S. MARINE CORPS RETIRED . No one here needs to announce their branch of service or rank; they are simply Suites, and this is where they belong. Once again, despite my hard work and perseverance, I have been disallowed from the true American elite. Once again, I am “Not our class, dear.” I am reminded of watching The Love Boat on my grandmother’s Zenith, which either was given to her or we found in the trash (I get our many malfunctioning Zeniths confused) and whose tube got so hot, I would put little chunks of government cheese on a thin tissue atop it to give our welfare treat a pleasant, Reagan-era gooeyness. I could not understand English well enough then to catch the nuances of that seafaring program, but I knew that there were differences in the status of the passengers, and that sometimes those differences made them sad. Still, this ship, this plenty—every few steps, there are complimentary nachos or milkshakes or gyros on offer—was the fatty fuel of my childhood dreams. If only I had remained a child.

I walk around the outdoor decks looking for company. There is a middle-aged African American couple who always seem to be asleep in each other’s arms, probably exhausted from the late capitalism they regularly encounter on land. There is far more diversity on this ship than I expected. Many couples are a testament to Loving v. Virginia , and there is a large group of folks whose T-shirts read MELANIN AT SEA / IT’S THE MELANIN FOR ME . I smile when I see them, but then some young kids from the group makes Mr. Washy Washy do a cruel, caricatured “Burger Dance” (today he is in his burger getup), and I think, Well, so much for intersectionality .

At the infinity pool on Deck 17, I spot some elderly women who could be ethnic and from my part of the world, and so I jump in. I am proved correct! Many of them seem to be originally from Queens (“Corona was still great when it was all Italian”), though they are now spread across the tristate area. We bond over the way “Ron-kon-koma” sounds when announced in Penn Station.

“Everyone is here for a different reason,” one of them tells me. She and her ex-husband last sailed together four years ago to prove to themselves that their marriage was truly over. Her 15-year-old son lost his virginity to “an Irish young lady” while their ship was moored in Ravenna, Italy. The gaggle of old-timers competes to tell me their favorite cruising stories and tips. “A guy proposed in Central Park a couple of years ago”—many Royal Caribbean ships apparently have this ridiculous communal area—“and she ran away screaming!” “If you’re diamond-class, you get four drinks for free.” “A different kind of passenger sails out of Bayonne.” (This, perhaps, is racially coded.) “Sometimes, if you tip the bartender $5, your next drink will be free.”

“Everyone’s here for a different reason,” the woman whose marriage ended on a cruise tells me again. “Some people are here for bad reasons—the drinkers and the gamblers. Some people are here for medical reasons.” I have seen more than a few oxygen tanks and at least one woman clearly undergoing very serious chemo. Some T-shirts celebrate good news about a cancer diagnosis. This might be someone’s last cruise or week on Earth. For these women, who have spent months, if not years, at sea, cruising is a ritual as well as a life cycle: first love, last love, marriage, divorce, death.

Read: The last place on Earth any tourist should go

I have talked with these women for so long, tonight I promise myself that after a sad solitary dinner I will not try to seek out company at the bars in the mall or the adult-themed Hideaway. I have enough material to fulfill my duties to this publication. As I approach my orphaned suite, I run into the aggro young people who stole Mr. and Mrs. Rand away from me the night before. The tattooed apparitions pass me without a glance. She is singing something violent about “Stuttering Stanley” (a character in a popular horror movie, as I discover with my complimentary VOOM SM Surf & Stream Internet at Sea) and he’s loudly shouting about “all the money I’ve lost,” presumably at the casino in the bowels of the ship.

So these bent psychos out of a Cormac McCarthy novel are angrily inhabiting my deck. As I mewl myself to sleep, I envision a limited series for HBO or some other streamer, a kind of low-rent White Lotus , where several aggressive couples conspire to throw a shy intellectual interloper overboard. I type the scenario into my phone. As I fall asleep, I think of what the woman who recently divorced her husband and whose son became a man through the good offices of the Irish Republic told me while I was hoisting myself out of the infinity pool. “I’m here because I’m an explorer. I’m here because I’m trying something new.” What if I allowed myself to believe in her fantasy?

“YOU REALLY STARTED AT THE TOP,” they tell me. I’m at the Coastal Kitchen for my eggs and corned-beef hash, and the maître d’ has slotted me in between two couples. Fueled by coffee or perhaps intrigued by my relative youth, they strike up a conversation with me. As always, people are shocked that this is my first cruise. They contrast the Icon favorably with all the preceding liners in the Royal Caribbean fleet, usually commenting on the efficiency of the elevators that hurl us from deck to deck (as in many large corporate buildings, the elevators ask you to choose a floor and then direct you to one of many lifts). The couple to my right, from Palo Alto—he refers to his “porn mustache” and calls his wife “my cougar” because she is two years older—tell me they are “Pandemic Pinnacles.”

This is the day that my eyes will be opened. Pinnacles , it is explained to me over translucent cantaloupe, have sailed with Royal Caribbean for 700 ungodly nights. Pandemic Pinnacles took advantage of the two-for-one accrual rate of Pinnacle points during the pandemic, when sailing on a cruise ship was even more ill-advised, to catapult themselves into Pinnacle status.

Because of the importance of the inaugural voyage of the world’s largest cruise liner, more than 200 Pinnacles are on this ship, a startling number, it seems. Mrs. Palo Alto takes out a golden badge that I have seen affixed over many a breast, which reads CROWN AND ANCHOR SOCIETY along with her name. This is the coveted badge of the Pinnacle. “You should hear all the whining in Guest Services,” her husband tells me. Apparently, the Pinnacles who are not also Suites like us are all trying to use their status to get into Coastal Kitchen, our elite restaurant. Even a Pinnacle needs to be a Suite to access this level of corned-beef hash.

“We’re just baby Pinnacles,” Mrs. Palo Alto tells me, describing a kind of internal class struggle among the Pinnacle elite for ever higher status.

And now I understand what the maître d’ was saying to me on the first day of my cruise. He wasn’t saying “ pendejo .” He was saying “Pinnacle.” The dining room was for Pinnacles only, all those older people rolling in like the tide on their motorized scooters.

And now I understand something else: This whole thing is a cult. And like most cults, it can’t help but mirror the endless American fight for status. Like Keith Raniere’s NXIVM, where different-colored sashes were given out to connote rank among Raniere’s branded acolytes, this is an endless competition among Pinnacles, Suites, Diamond-Plusers, and facing-the-mall, no-balcony purple SeaPass Card peasants, not to mention the many distinctions within each category. The more you cruise, the higher your status. No wonder a section of the Royal Promenade is devoted to getting passengers to book their next cruise during the one they should be enjoying now. No wonder desperate Royal Caribbean offers (“FINAL HOURS”) crowded my email account weeks before I set sail. No wonder the ship’s jewelry store, the Royal Bling, is selling a $100,000 golden chalice that will entitle its owner to drink free on Royal Caribbean cruises for life. (One passenger was already gaming out whether her 28-year-old son was young enough to “just about earn out” on the chalice or if that ship had sailed.) No wonder this ship was sold out months before departure , and we had to pay $19,000 for a horrid suite away from the Suite Neighborhood. No wonder the most mythical hero of Royal Caribbean lore is someone named Super Mario, who has cruised so often, he now has his own working desk on many ships. This whole experience is part cult, part nautical pyramid scheme.

From the June 2014 issue: Ship of wonks

“The toilets are amazing,” the Palo Altos are telling me. “One flush and you’re done.” “They don’t understand how energy-efficient these ships are,” the husband of the other couple is telling me. “They got the LNG”—liquefied natural gas, which is supposed to make the Icon a boon to the environment (a concept widely disputed and sometimes ridiculed by environmentalists).

But I’m thinking along a different line of attack as I spear my last pallid slice of melon. For my streaming limited series, a Pinnacle would have to get killed by either an outright peasant or a Suite without an ocean view. I tell my breakfast companions my idea.

“Oh, for sure a Pinnacle would have to be killed,” Mr. Palo Alto, the Pandemic Pinnacle, says, touching his porn mustache thoughtfully as his wife nods.

“THAT’S RIGHT, IT’S your time, buddy!” Hubert, my fun-loving Panamanian cabin attendant, shouts as I step out of my suite in a robe. “Take it easy, buddy!”

I have come up with a new dressing strategy. Instead of trying to impress with my choice of T-shirts, I have decided to start wearing a robe, as one does at a resort property on land, with a proper spa and hammam. The response among my fellow cruisers has been ecstatic. “Look at you in the robe!” Mr. Rand cries out as we pass each other by the Thrill Island aqua park. “You’re living the cruise life! You know, you really drank me under the table that night.” I laugh as we part ways, but my soul cries out, Please spend more time with me, Mr. and Mrs. Rand; I so need the company .

In my white robe, I am a stately presence, a refugee from a better limited series, a one-man crossover episode. (Only Suites are granted these robes to begin with.) Today, I will try many of the activities these ships have on offer to provide their clientele with a sense of never-ceasing motion. Because I am already at Thrill Island, I decide to climb the staircase to what looks like a mast on an old-fashioned ship (terrified, because I am afraid of heights) to try a ride called “Storm Chasers,” which is part of the “Category 6” water park, named in honor of one of the storms that may someday do away with the Port of Miami entirely. Storm Chasers consists of falling from the “mast” down a long, twisting neon tube filled with water, like being the camera inside your own colonoscopy, as you hold on to the handles of a mat, hoping not to die. The tube then flops you down headfirst into a trough of water, a Royal Caribbean baptism. It both knocks my breath out and makes me sad.

In keeping with the aquatic theme, I attend a show at the AquaDome. To the sound of “Live and Let Die,” a man in a harness gyrates to and fro in the sultry air. I saw something very similar in the back rooms of the famed Berghain club in early-aughts Berlin. Soon another harnessed man is gyrating next to the first. Ja , I think to myself, I know how this ends. Now will come the fisting , natürlich . But the show soon devolves into the usual Marvel-film-grade nonsense, with too much light and sound signifying nichts . If any fisting is happening, it is probably in the Suite Neighborhood, inside a cabin marked with an upside-down pineapple, which I understand means a couple are ready to swing, and I will see none of it.

I go to the ice show, which is a kind of homage—if that’s possible—to the periodic table, done with the style and pomp and masterful precision that would please the likes of Kim Jong Un, if only he could afford Royal Caribbean talent. At one point, the dancers skate to the theme song of Succession . “See that!” I want to say to my fellow Suites—at “cultural” events, we have a special section reserved for us away from the commoners—“ Succession ! It’s even better than the zombie show! Open your minds!”

Finally, I visit a comedy revue in an enormous and too brightly lit version of an “intimate,” per Royal Caribbean literature, “Manhattan comedy club.” Many of the jokes are about the cruising life. “I’ve lived on ships for 20 years,” one of the middle-aged comedians says. “I can only see so many Filipino homosexuals dressed as a taco.” He pauses while the audience laughs. “I am so fired tonight,” he says. He segues into a Trump impression and then Biden falling asleep at the microphone, which gets the most laughs. “Anyone here from Fort Leonard Wood?” another comedian asks. Half the crowd seems to cheer. As I fall asleep that night, I realize another connection I have failed to make, and one that may explain some of the diversity on this vessel—many of its passengers have served in the military.

As a coddled passenger with a suite, I feel like I am starting to understand what it means to have a rank and be constantly reminded of it. There are many espresso makers , I think as I look across the expanse of my officer-grade quarters before closing my eyes, but this one is mine .

A shocking sight greets me beyond the pools of Deck 17 as I saunter over to the Coastal Kitchen for my morning intake of slightly sour Americanos. A tiny city beneath a series of perfectly pressed green mountains. Land! We have docked for a brief respite in Basseterre, the capital of St. Kitts and Nevis. I wolf down my egg scramble to be one of the first passengers off the ship. Once past the gangway, I barely refrain from kissing the ground. I rush into the sights and sounds of this scruffy island city, sampling incredible conch curry and buckets of non-Starbucks coffee. How wonderful it is to be where God intended humans to be: on land. After all, I am neither a fish nor a mall rat. This is my natural environment. Basseterre may not be Havana, but there are signs of human ingenuity and desire everywhere you look. The Black Table Grill Has been Relocated to Soho Village, Market Street, Directly Behind of, Gary’s Fruits and Flower Shop. Signed. THE PORK MAN reads a sign stuck to a wall. Now, that is how you write a sign. A real sign, not the come-ons for overpriced Rolexes that blink across the screens of the Royal Promenade.

“Hey, tie your shoestring!” a pair of laughing ladies shout to me across the street.

“Thank you!” I shout back. Shoestring! “Thank you very much.”

A man in Independence Square Park comes by and asks if I want to play with his monkey. I haven’t heard that pickup line since the Penn Station of the 1980s. But then he pulls a real monkey out of a bag. The monkey is wearing a diaper and looks insane. Wonderful , I think, just wonderful! There is so much life here. I email my editor asking if I can remain on St. Kitts and allow the Icon to sail off into the horizon without me. I have even priced a flight home at less than $300, and I have enough material from the first four days on the cruise to write the entire story. “It would be funny …” my editor replies. “Now get on the boat.”

As I slink back to the ship after my brief jailbreak, the locals stand under umbrellas to gaze at and photograph the boat that towers over their small capital city. The limousines of the prime minister and his lackeys are parked beside the gangway. St. Kitts, I’ve been told, is one of the few islands that would allow a ship of this size to dock.

“We hear about all the waterslides,” a sweet young server in one of the cafés told me. “We wish we could go on the ship, but we have to work.”

“I want to stay on your island,” I replied. “I love it here.”

But she didn’t understand how I could possibly mean that.

“WASHY, WASHY, so you don’t get stinky, stinky!” kids are singing outside the AquaDome, while their adult minders look on in disapproval, perhaps worried that Mr. Washy Washy is grooming them into a life of gayness. I heard a southern couple skip the buffet entirely out of fear of Mr. Washy Washy.

Meanwhile, I have found a new watering hole for myself, the Swim & Tonic, the biggest swim-up bar on any cruise ship in the world. Drinking next to full-size, nearly naked Americans takes away one’s own self-consciousness. The men have curvaceous mom bodies. The women are equally un-shy about their sprawling physiques.

Today I’ve befriended a bald man with many children who tells me that all of the little trinkets that Royal Caribbean has left us in our staterooms and suites are worth a fortune on eBay. “Eighty dollars for the water bottle, 60 for the lanyard,” the man says. “This is a cult.”

“Tell me about it,” I say. There is, however, a clientele for whom this cruise makes perfect sense. For a large middle-class family (he works in “supply chains”), seven days in a lower-tier cabin—which starts at $1,800 a person—allow the parents to drop off their children in Surfside, where I imagine many young Filipina crew members will take care of them, while the parents are free to get drunk at a swim-up bar and maybe even get intimate in their cabin. Cruise ships have become, for a certain kind of hardworking family, a form of subsidized child care.

There is another man I would like to befriend at the Swim & Tonic, a tall, bald fellow who is perpetually inebriated and who wears a necklace studded with little rubber duckies in sunglasses, which, I am told, is a sort of secret handshake for cruise aficionados. Tomorrow, I will spend more time with him, but first the ship docks at St. Thomas, in the U.S. Virgin Islands. Charlotte Amalie, the capital, is more charming in name than in presence, but I still all but jump off the ship to score a juicy oxtail and plantains at the well-known Petite Pump Room, overlooking the harbor. From one of the highest points in the small city, the Icon of the Seas appears bigger than the surrounding hills.

I usually tan very evenly, but something about the discombobulation of life at sea makes me forget the regular application of sunscreen. As I walk down the streets of Charlotte Amalie in my fluorescent Icon of the Seas cap, an old Rastafarian stares me down. “Redneck,” he hisses.

“No,” I want to tell him, as I bring a hand up to my red neck, “that’s not who I am at all. On my island, Mannahatta, as Whitman would have it, I am an interesting person living within an engaging artistic milieu. I do not wish to use the Caribbean as a dumping ground for the cruise-ship industry. I love the work of Derek Walcott. You don’t understand. I am not a redneck. And if I am, they did this to me.” They meaning Royal Caribbean? Its passengers? The Rands?

“They did this to me!”

Back on the Icon, some older matrons are muttering about a run-in with passengers from the Celebrity cruise ship docked next to us, the Celebrity Apex. Although Celebrity Cruises is also owned by Royal Caribbean, I am made to understand that there is a deep fratricidal beef between passengers of the two lines. “We met a woman from the Apex,” one matron says, “and she says it was a small ship and there was nothing to do. Her face was as tight as a 19-year-old’s, she had so much surgery.” With those words, and beneath a cloudy sky, humidity shrouding our weathered faces and red necks, we set sail once again, hopefully in the direction of home.

THERE ARE BARELY 48 HOURS LEFT to the cruise, and the Icon of the Seas’ passengers are salty. They know how to work the elevators. They know the Washy Washy song by heart. They understand that the chicken gyro at “Feta Mediterranean,” in the AquaDome Market, is the least problematic form of chicken on the ship.

The passengers have shed their INAUGURAL CRUISE T-shirts and are now starting to evince political opinions. There are caps pledging to make America great again and T-shirts that celebrate words sometimes attributed to Patrick Henry: “The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people; it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government.” With their preponderance of FAMILY FLAG FAITH FRIENDS FIREARMS T-shirts, the tables by the crepe station sometimes resemble the Capitol Rotunda on January 6. The Real Anthony Fauci , by Robert F. Kennedy Jr., appears to be a popular form of literature, especially among young men with very complicated versions of the American flag on their T-shirts. Other opinions blend the personal and the political. “Someone needs to kill Washy guy, right?” a well-dressed man in the elevator tells me, his gray eyes radiating nothing. “Just beat him to death. Am I right?” I overhear the male member of a young couple whisper, “There goes that freak” as I saunter by in my white spa robe, and I decide to retire it for the rest of the cruise.

I visit the Royal Bling to see up close the $100,000 golden chalice that entitles you to free drinks on Royal Caribbean forever. The pleasant Serbian saleslady explains that the chalice is actually gold-plated and covered in white zirconia instead of diamonds, as it would otherwise cost $1 million. “If you already have everything,” she explains, “this is one more thing you can get.”

I believe that anyone who works for Royal Caribbean should be entitled to immediate American citizenship. They already speak English better than most of the passengers and, per the Serbian lady’s sales pitch above, better understand what America is as well. Crew members like my Panamanian cabin attendant seem to work 24 hours a day. A waiter from New Delhi tells me that his contract is six months and three weeks long. After a cruise ends, he says, “in a few hours, we start again for the next cruise.” At the end of the half a year at sea, he is allowed a two-to-three-month stay at home with his family. As of 2019, the median income for crew members was somewhere in the vicinity of $20,000, according to a major business publication. Royal Caribbean would not share the current median salary for its crew members, but I am certain that it amounts to a fraction of the cost of a Royal Bling gold-plated, zirconia-studded chalice.

And because most of the Icon’s hyper-sanitized spaces are just a frittata away from being a Delta lounge, one forgets that there are actual sailors on this ship, charged with the herculean task of docking it in port. “Having driven 100,000-ton aircraft carriers throughout my career,” retired Admiral James G. Stavridis, the former NATO Supreme Allied Commander Europe, writes to me, “I’m not sure I would even know where to begin with trying to control a sea monster like this one nearly three times the size.” (I first met Stavridis while touring Army bases in Germany more than a decade ago.)

Today, I decide to head to the hot tub near Swim & Tonic, where some of the ship’s drunkest reprobates seem to gather (the other tubs are filled with families and couples). The talk here, like everywhere else on the ship, concerns football, a sport about which I know nothing. It is apparent that four teams have recently competed in some kind of finals for the year, and that two of them will now face off in the championship. Often when people on the Icon speak, I will try to repeat the last thing they said with a laugh or a nod of disbelief. “Yes, 20-yard line! Ha!” “Oh my God, of course, scrimmage.”

Soon we are joined in the hot tub by the late-middle-age drunk guy with the duck necklace. He is wearing a bucket hat with the legend HAWKEYES , which, I soon gather, is yet another football team. “All right, who turned me in?” Duck Necklace says as he plops into the tub beside us. “I get a call in the morning,” he says. “It’s security. Can you come down to the dining room by 10 a.m.? You need to stay away from the members of this religious family.” Apparently, the gregarious Duck Necklace had photobombed the wrong people. There are several families who present as evangelical Christians or practicing Muslims on the ship. One man, evidently, was not happy that Duck Necklace had made contact with his relatives. “It’s because of religious stuff; he was offended. I put my arm around 20 people a day.”

Everyone laughs. “They asked me three times if I needed medication,” he says of the security people who apparently interrogated him in full view of others having breakfast.

Another hot-tub denizen suggests that he should have asked for fentanyl. After a few more drinks, Duck Necklace begins to muse about what it would be like to fall off the ship. “I’m 62 and I’m ready to go,” he says. “I just don’t want a shark to eat me. I’m a huge God guy. I’m a Bible guy. There’s some Mayan theory squaring science stuff with religion. There is so much more to life on Earth.” We all nod into our Red Stripes.

“I never get off the ship when we dock,” he says. He tells us he lost $6,000 in the casino the other day. Later, I look him up, and it appears that on land, he’s a financial adviser in a crisp gray suit, probably a pillar of his North Chicago community.

THE OCEAN IS TEEMING with fascinating life, but on the surface it has little to teach us. The waves come and go. The horizon remains ever far away.

I am constantly told by my fellow passengers that “everybody here has a story.” Yes, I want to reply, but everybody everywhere has a story. You, the reader of this essay, have a story, and yet you’re not inclined to jump on a cruise ship and, like Duck Necklace, tell your story to others at great pitch and volume. Maybe what they’re saying is that everybody on this ship wants to have a bigger, more coherent, more interesting story than the one they’ve been given. Maybe that’s why there’s so much signage on the doors around me attesting to marriages spent on the sea. Maybe that’s why the Royal Caribbean newsletter slipped under my door tells me that “this isn’t a vacation day spent—it’s bragging rights earned.” Maybe that’s why I’m so lonely.

Today is a big day for Icon passengers. Today the ship docks at Royal Caribbean’s own Bahamian island, the Perfect Day at CocoCay. (This appears to be the actual name of the island.) A comedian at the nightclub opined on what his perfect day at CocoCay would look like—receiving oral sex while learning that his ex-wife had been killed in a car crash (big laughter). But the reality of the island is far less humorous than that.

One of the ethnic tristate ladies in the infinity pool told me that she loved CocoCay because it had exactly the same things that could be found on the ship itself. This proves to be correct. It is like the Icon, but with sand. The same tired burgers, the same colorful tubes conveying children and water from Point A to B. The same swim-up bar at its Hideaway ($140 for admittance, no children allowed; Royal Caribbean must be printing money off its clientele). “There was almost a fight at The Wizard of Oz ,” I overhear an elderly woman tell her companion on a chaise lounge. Apparently one of the passengers began recording Royal Caribbean’s intellectual property and “three guys came after him.”

I walk down a pathway to the center of the island, where a sign reads DO NOT ENTER: YOU HAVE REACHED THE BOUNDARY OF ADVENTURE . I hear an animal scampering in the bushes. A Royal Caribbean worker in an enormous golf cart soon chases me down and takes me back to the Hideaway, where I run into Mrs. Rand in a bikini. She becomes livid telling me about an altercation she had the other day with a woman over a towel and a deck chair. We Suites have special towel privileges; we do not have to hand over our SeaPass Card to score a towel. But the Rands are not Suites. “People are so entitled here,” Mrs. Rand says. “It’s like the airport with all its classes.” “You see,” I want to say, “this is where your husband’s love of Ayn Rand runs into the cruelties and arbitrary indignities of unbridled capitalism.” Instead we make plans to meet for a final drink in the Schooner Bar tonight (the Rands will stand me up).

Back on the ship, I try to do laps, but the pool (the largest on any cruise ship, naturally) is fully trashed with the detritus of American life: candy wrappers, a slowly dissolving tortilla chip, napkins. I take an extra-long shower in my suite, then walk around the perimeter of the ship on a kind of exercise track, past all the alluring lifeboats in their yellow-and-white livery. Maybe there is a dystopian angle to the HBO series that I will surely end up pitching, one with shades of WALL-E or Snowpiercer . In a collapsed world, a Royal Caribbean–like cruise liner sails from port to port, collecting new shipmates and supplies in exchange for the precious energy it has on board. (The actual Icon features a new technology that converts passengers’ poop into enough energy to power the waterslides . In the series, this shitty technology would be greatly expanded.) A very young woman (18? 19?), smart and lonely, who has only known life on the ship, walks along the same track as I do now, contemplating jumping off into the surf left by its wake. I picture reusing Duck Necklace’s words in the opening shot of the pilot. The girl is walking around the track, her eyes on the horizon; maybe she’s highborn—a Suite—and we hear the voice-over: “I’m 19 and I’m ready to go. I just don’t want a shark to eat me.”

Before the cruise is finished, I talk to Mr. Washy Washy, or Nielbert of the Philippines. He is a sweet, gentle man, and I thank him for the earworm of a song he has given me and for keeping us safe from the dreaded norovirus. “This is very important to me, getting people to wash their hands,” he tells me in his burger getup. He has dreams, as an artist and a performer, but they are limited in scope. One day he wants to dress up as a piece of bacon for the morning shift.

THE MAIDEN VOYAGE OF THE TITANIC (the Icon of the Seas is five times as large as that doomed vessel) at least offered its passengers an exciting ending to their cruise, but when I wake up on the eighth day, all I see are the gray ghosts that populate Miami’s condo skyline. Throughout my voyage, my writer friends wrote in to commiserate with me. Sloane Crosley, who once covered a three-day spa mini-cruise for Vogue , tells me she felt “so very alone … I found it very untethering.” Gideon Lewis-Kraus writes in an Instagram comment: “When Gary is done I think it’s time this genre was taken out back and shot.” And he is right. To badly paraphrase Adorno: After this, no more cruise stories. It is unfair to put a thinking person on a cruise ship. Writers typically have difficult childhoods, and it is cruel to remind them of the inherent loneliness that drove them to writing in the first place. It is also unseemly to write about the kind of people who go on cruises. Our country does not provide the education and upbringing that allow its citizens an interior life. For the creative class to point fingers at the large, breasty gentlemen adrift in tortilla-chip-laden pools of water is to gather a sour harvest of low-hanging fruit.

A day or two before I got off the ship, I decided to make use of my balcony, which I had avoided because I thought the view would only depress me further. What I found shocked me. My suite did not look out on Central Park after all. This entire time, I had been living in the ship’s Disneyland, Surfside, the neighborhood full of screaming toddlers consuming milkshakes and candy. And as I leaned out over my balcony, I beheld a slight vista of the sea and surf that I thought I had been missing. It had been there all along. The sea was frothy and infinite and blue-green beneath the span of a seagull’s wing. And though it had been trod hard by the world’s largest cruise ship, it remained.

This article appears in the May 2024 print edition with the headline “A Meatball at Sea.” When you buy a book using a link on this page, we receive a commission. Thank you for supporting The Atlantic.

5 reasons to turn down a cruise ship cabin upgrade

Turn down a cruise cabin upgrade? You might think it sounds ridiculous — and you're right. If a cruise offers me a free suite, I'm certainly not going to say no.

The sad truth is free upgrades are rare. The days of surprise upgrades from your cozy inside cabin to a spacious balcony room are mostly over.

Nowadays, cruise lines expect you to pay for your cruise ship cabin upgrades. Free upgrades , when offered, are hardly ever as good as they sound and are typically from one room to another within the same cabin category.

If you're going to pay good money for an upgrade, be positive your new digs are much better than the original room you picked. If they're not, tell the cruise line they do not have a deal. Here are five reasons to turn down a cruise ship cabin upgrade.

For more cruise news, reviews and tips, sign up for TPG's free cruise newsletter .

You can't pick your cabin location

An upgrade is essentially the same as booking a guarantee cabin — a type of room where your cabin category is guaranteed, but your specific room location is not. You agree to let the cruise line pick your cabin in exchange for giving you a discount on that room. You give up the right to control where on the ship your cabin is located.

If you're prone to seasickness and prefer a midship cabin on a lower deck, you might not want an upgrade that could land you at the very front or back of the ship where it's rockier.

If you're sensitive to noise and specifically chose a room far away from the elevators and the noisy Lido Deck, you will want to say no to a cabin upgrade that can't guarantee a quiet locale.

Travel groups that purposefully booked rooms near each other should not accept upgrades that would split them among different decks.

RELATED: 8 cabin locations you should definitely avoid

When that cruise ship cabin upgrade offer arrives, think about how strongly you feel about where your cabin is located. If location is important, you will want to turn down the upgrade offer.

It's too expensive

Not all cruise cabin upgrades are free. Typically, the cruise line will offer the upgrade at a discount, meaning you'll pay less for the upgraded room than it would cost to book it outright, but more than what you paid for your original cabin.

No matter how good a deal that seems, if money is tight, don't take the upgrade. Save your vacation budget for tours and shoreside fun or onboard treats like date-night restaurants and fun cocktails.

After all, you'll get a bed and bathroom no matter which cabin you choose, but you won't have as much fun if you have no budget left to spend once you're on board.

Related: 15 ways that cruisers waste money on ships

You booked a specific cabin type

Some travelers need specific cabins. Cruisers who use a wheelchair or have mobility difficulties purposefully book accessible cabins with roll-in showers and wider doorways. Families book connecting cabins or designated family-friendly rooms with an extra bathroom or that can sleep five or six. Wellness enthusiasts book spa cabins for their Zen-like decor and thermal suite perks.

If you have booked a specific type of cabin for a reason, do not accept an upgrade offer. Usually, the cruise line cannot guarantee they will upgrade you from one accessible or spa cabin to a nicer one. In addition, upgrade offers apply to a single cabin, not a pair of connecting rooms.

You might not get all the perks

Complimentary perks are a popular booking incentive used by several cruise lines. Depending on the type of cabin you book, you're rewarded with onboard credit or your choice of several freebies, such as an included drink package or shore excursion credit.

When you accept an upgrade offer, you won't receive the booking perks associated with the higher-category room (though you will receive any room-based perks, like concierge access or priority debarkation). Worse, you could actually lose the perks you already have.

RELATED: The 5 most desirable cabin locations on any cruise ship

How? If you booked a cruise and then notice that prices have fallen, you can give yourself an upgrade by rebooking a nicer cabin at a lower price. In doing so, you will often lose your previous booking perks and be eligible only for the current promotion.

For example, if you booked a promotion offering free Wi-Fi and a $100 onboard credit, but the current offer focuses on low prices and a $50 onboard credit, you might lose the internet package and half the onboard credit when you rebook to upgrade your cabin.

Decide whether the trade-off between a nicer cabin and your existing booking perks is worth it. If not, don't go for the cabin upgrade.

The upgrade isn't good enough

You should only say yes to a cruise cabin upgrade if it will get you a nicer cabin. However, what a cruise line deems a better cabin might not actually be worth more money in your eyes.

For example, cruise lines break down all the cabins within the same category (for example, all outside cabins) into subcategories, based on location, layout, size and perks. A midship inside cabin on an upper deck might be deemed more desirable and priced higher than an inside cabin on a lower deck at the back of the ship.

A cruise line might offer you a same-category upgrade, moving from one balcony cabin to a "better" balcony cabin, rather than to a mini-suite. If you don't care about cabin location, don't take the cabin upgrade. You'll end up paying more for a room that's essentially the same as the one you booked for less.

If the upgrade is free, or if the new cabin comes with extras you will use (such as concierge access or spa perks), consider saying yes. However, if the cost of the upgrade is not worth whatever benefits the new room has, politely decline the cruise cabin upgrade.

Bottom line

In many cases, a cruise ship cabin upgrade will get you a better cabin — roomier accommodations, a better ship location, and maybe extra perks. However, not all upgrade offers are desirable, especially if what you value in a cabin type and location is not what the cruise line will give you. Don't hesitate to say no to an upgrade if the offer does not represent good value for your money.

Planning a cruise? Start with these stories:

• The 5 most desirable cabin locations on any cruise ship
• A beginners guide to picking a cruise line
• The 8 worst cabin locations on any cruise ship
• The ultimate guide to what to pack for a cruise
• A quick guide to the most popular cruise lines
• 21 tips and tricks that will make your cruise go smoothly
• Top ways cruisers waste money
• The ultimate guide to choosing a cruise ship cabin