virgin exotic southern caribbean cruise

Southeastern Caribbean Isles

7-NIGHT ROUND-TRIP SAILING FROM SAN JUAN

Scenic springs and magical mud baths in St. Lucia

Set sail on a round-trip voyage from San Juan with stops in some of the most stunning islands in the Caribbean like Tortola, BVI; Pointe-à-Pitre, Guadeloupe; Bridgetown, Barbados; Castries, St. Lucia; and Fort-de-France, Martinique — before heading back to the shores of Puerto Rico.

The Virgin Voyages Experience

From captivating coasts to laid-back island vibes, the exclusively adult cruise vacation of your dreams is here.

Easy port access in San Juan

Have all the must-see spots within walking distance with the ship docked in the heart of Old San Juan, and soak up Puerto Rico’s effervescent vibes.

Hassle-free embarkation

Pre-upload your travel docs to the Virgin Voyages app, get Ready to Sail before leaving home, and make boarding a (sea)breeze in just a few minutes.

5 ports in 7 nights

Make the most of your time off, experiencing the culture of 5 unique cities in an epic 7-night cruise with people just as hungry for adventure as you.

Late stay in St. Johns

From hiking up to Fort Barrington to snorkeling down the shiny sea — with a late departure, you’ll get to do it all, so you better save some energy.

The places you'll go

Beyond the picturesque beaches and pastel-lined streets, Puerto Rico’s capital is perfectly located to easily access the geographic diversity of this gorgeous island.

The largest of the British Virgin Islands boasts famed natural wonders like The Baths of Tortola giving way to vibrant reefs and snow-white beaches.

Pointe-à-Pitre

On islands home to lush national parks and streaming waterfalls, Guadeloupe’s largest city is known for its vivacious French feel, and lively fish markets.

Miles of sandy beaches and teal waters meet rhythmic local culture and unbelievably mouth-watering classic dishes in this electric Barbadian city.

Visit the sulfur hot springs, hike through the Piton mountains, or soak in the volcanic mud baths — the capital of St Lucia is a sanctuary for outdoor enthusiasts.

Fort-de-France

An island rich with contrasts, Martinique mixes quiet moments on quaint beaches or atop dramatic mountains with the cultural vibrancy of downtown Fort-de-France.

We have even more in our curated catalog.

An ocean of opportunities calling your name.

There’s nothing more liberating than having the freedom of charting your own course. No pre-assigned seating, no fixed schedules, no limited options, no nonsense — just a shipload of opportunities to rejuvenate your body and transform your soul.

WANDERLUST SATISFIED

We’re making waves from the Caribbean to the Med, the Adriatic to the Red, and everywhere in between across 4 continents. Join us on an unparalleled journey of relaxation and indulgence, and discover the things — and the people — that make each destination so special. Because we didn’t build a cruise, we created a voyage.   Get a delicious taste of the modern romance of sailing that only a Virgin brand could pull off.

Book Now. Pay Monthly.

A flexible, pay-over-time solution, up to $375 in value, add a splash for your bash, limited-time cruise deals.

You deserve a vacation. And you deserve a deal. So we’re making both of those things happen. Wave goodbye to your routine and start planning an exclusively adult experience at sea.

Rest Your Head

These are the spots you might be calling home. Whether you prefer coffee (or cocktails) overlooking the waves, or waking up late in your own cocoon, we're holding space for you.

Always Included Luxury

We’ve taken care of all the details — so all you have to do is kick back and have the relaxing vacation you deserve. Everything below is included.

From refined dining to relaxed casual, all of our 20+ eateries featuring menus curated by Michelin star chefs are yours to enjoy.

Soft Drinks & Water

Stay hydrated with still and sparkling water, non-pressed juices, sodas, teas and even drip coffee.

Browse, post, and stay connected with wifi — whenever you want, and wherever you are on the ship.

We've taken care (of taking care) of your servers, so we cover the gratuities for your onboard experiences.

Group Fitness Classes

Yoga, meditation, cycling, HIIT classes, and more — all your group fitness classes are covered.

Shows & Entertainment

Developed by the world’s most-talked-about producers and artists, you have a ticket to all of our awe-inspiring shows.

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8-Day Exotic Southern Caribbean Cruise

Fun with a capital F is what you can expect on a Carnival Cruise. With the largest fleet at sea Carnival offers sailings perfect for the whole family.

Cruise to the Caribbean for tropical weather and splendid beach-side excursions.

In Miami, you’ll enjoy a small taste of the tropical weather many of you will experience during your cruise, and you’ll see why Miami is one of the most popular places to live in America.

• Carnival Horizon - Passenger Capacity: 3,960 (double occupancy) Year Built: 2018 Last Refurbished:  2022

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Carnival Horizon

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Miami, Florida , Kralendijk, Bonaire, Dutch Antilles , Port of Oranjestad, Aruba, Caribbean , La Romana, Dominican Republic , Amber Cove, Dominican Republic

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8-Day Exotic Southern Caribbean Cruise sailing on the Carnival Horizon

Departure dates: jun 2024 - oct 2024, stateroom prices for jun. 8, 2024.

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Sailing Map

*** All itineraries are subject to change without notice. Please confirm your itinerary on the Review page before purchasing your cruise.

Carnival reserves the right to re-instate the fuel supplement for all guests at up to $9 per person per day if the NYMEX oil price exceeds $70 per barrel. Rates & offers are subject to select dates & categories, cruise only, per person, based on double occupancy, in US Dollars, & include NCCF. Government taxes & fees are additional. All rates & offers are capacity controlled, are subject to availability & confirmation, & may change without notice. Additional restrictions may apply. Information deemed reliable but not guaranteed -- please confirm details at time of booking. Stateroom photos are for sample purposes only -- actual design and layout may vary.

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7 Night Atlantis Exotic Southern Caribbean Cruise

Find out how crowded are ports - cruise ship traffic during this voyage. Click on each port for more details.

San Juan, Puerto Rico

Oranjestad, Aruba

Willemstad, Curacao

Fort de France, Martinique

Basseterre, St. Kitts

VIRGIN EXOTIC SOUTHERN CARIBBEAN CRUISE 2024 – SOLD OUT

Atlantis charts a new course in 2024 when we set sail on Richard Branson’s Virgin Voyages from San Juan to four of the most beautiful islands in the Caribbean. Discover a new way to play with unforgettable experiences everywhere! In seven magical nights you’ll discover jaw-dropping entertainment, fabulously original dining, gorgeous design, spectacular service and so much more on the dazzling new Brilliant Lady. It’s the perfect match of Virgin Voyages design plus Atlantis’ sensational entertainment and fun!

• Accomodations

Play Like a Virgin

Get onboard the first ship purpose built for hyper-social, endlessly interactive, original fun — changing everything you thought about playing on the ocean. You’ll feel like a true sailor on your own massive yacht-like playground.

Imagine a pool deck designed for both relaxing and dancing. A gym you never want to leave. Chilling out in a net 13 stories above the ocean. Wellness that surrounds you. Innovative dining unlike anything at sea. Brunch in two places. Everyday. Drag queen hosts and pop-up moments of pure joy. Shows where you’re a part of the action and magic in unexpected places. And that’s just the beginning.

On top of all Virgin has to offer, we’ll bring you truly spectacular Atlantis parties, plenty of our own original entertainment, and so much more. We’ve never played like this before!

Four Exotic Islands. Seven Perfect Days!

Sail deep into the heart of the Caribbean, where unspoiled beaches become the gateway to unexpected adventures. Start with a relaxing day at sea before arriving on the famous powder-white sands of Aruba, where British ambience meets Caribbean charm. You’ll love  Aruba’s picture-perfect powder-white beaches, perfect weather, dazzling shopping, and laid-back vibe .  The brightly painted Dutch colonial town of Willemstad, Curacao  always  welcomes  Atlantis  to an island filled with dazzling coves, bright desert-like landscapes, and some of the world’s best scuba diving .

Step into a little corner of France on the lush island of Martinique where French, African, and Caribbean influences combine to create a uniquely welcoming culture on one of the world’s most beautiful islands. Stunning beaches border tropical rainforests while charming stores and inviting restaurants line the streets of Fort-de-France. It’s a fantastic place in every way to discover.

Picture-perfect beaches surround cloud-shrouded mountains on rugged St. Kitts, where adventure beckons in every direction. Dive an ancient shipwreck, sip some local rum, hike the crater of Mount Liamuiga, or delight in original Caribbean cuisine.

Everything Included. For Nothing.

Nobody likes paying for things they use all the time, like Wifi, basic beverages, and a terrific place for dinner. So, we don’t charge extra for them. Ever. Even fitness classes are included! Logon, drink up, spin a little, and enjoy!

Every fabulously original restaurant is included with more choices than any other ship at sea. All you have to do is decide whether to indulge in fresh Italian at Extra Virgin, Korean BBQ at Gumbae, an inventive tasting menu at the Test Kitchen, brunch or steak at the Wake, all-day treats at Razzle Dazzle, and so much more. And there’s no buffet in sight. Or a massive banquet-like main hall. But who needs one with all these amazing places?

Oh, and by basic beverages we mean sodas, water, coffees, juices, and most non-alcoholic offerings. The hard stuff is, of course, extra.

We’ll Show You

You’re never far from entertainment on Brilliant Lady, and sometimes you’re literally part of it! From pop-up surprises to sensual dance productions, cutting edge DJs to a sex-themed talk-show, innovative theater to secret stories.  All with a little magic thrown in.

The amazing Red Room is the perfect place for Atlantis’ Atlantis’ signature blend of singers, comics, drag queens, and our community’s most talented performers. All appearing throughout the week in new and creative ways.

Join us in the Manor for an endless parade of cabaret stars, interactive shows, comedians, and so much more.

All Feet On Deck

There’s never been a pool deck as perfectly designed for the Atlantis style of free-spirited dancing under the sun and stars. From our signature themed t-dances to outrageous nighttime parties we’ll host the world’s finest DJs with a production unlike anything you’ve ever seen. After all, this ship was built for a party like ours!  All we can say is wait until you’re in the middle of it all.

Indoors, we’ll host fabulous parties in both the Manor nightclub and Red Room. Virgin gives us the ideal venues to craft thrilling events in new and exciting ways.

Simply Awesome Deals

We can’t wait to show you the future of sailing with Virgin and Atlantis! It’s the perfect match of dazzling design and fantastic experiences. Get onboard today with low fares starting at just $1099!

Remember there’s more included here than any other cruise Atlantis offers:

– Included Basic WiFi – All Premium Dining Included. Everywhere! (even room service) – All Basic Beverages Included – All Fitness Classes Included – No extra service charges

We’re taking the sea to a whole new level as we visit the med in a whole new way next spring. Get onboard the ocean’s newest experience today and experience Brilliant Lady in her inaugural season!

Let’s Make Waves. The Virgin Voyages Story

Virgin Voyages was conceived with a simple idea in mind – redefine what a luxury cruise ship can be to create a radically fun new way to sail. Before a single ship was built, a deeply engaging sailor experience was crafted with an eye towards the future, focused on fun & freedom, discarding legacy cruise elements deeply rooted in the past. Breakthrough design creates a visually stunning and fabulously functional playground, and innovative approaches to entertainment, dining, and wellness will delight you in ways you never imagined.

We think Virgin has created the perfect ship for the Atlantis way to sail, allowing us to offer a bold and unique experience with a sense of freedom and playfulness that you simply won’t see anywhere else.

After all, no other cruise line has full-time drag queens onboard.

Designed for Fun!

You’ll never mistake Brilliant Lady for any other ship, except maybe one of her sisters. From her dramatic red and grey exterior to dazzling cool interiors, she’s the combination of the talents of world-class designers. Built to create an immersive, interactive, and playful experience everywhere.

Step onto the sleek pool deck and you’ll feel like she’s your own private yacht filled with great friends and whimsical furnishings. Find your perfect setting along one of the two inviting pools, or one of the massive surrounding decks. As the day evolves, relaxing vibes give way to festive poolside playfulness, ultimately transforming into in the perfect space for Atlantis’ friendly T-dances and outrageously fun night-time parties. A unique pool cover creates a spectacular and seamless dance floor and party space unlike any other at sea.

Sample your favorite sound at Virgin Vinyl or create a new one in the private karaoke rooms. Pop a cork at the gorgeous Champagne bar after a moment of glory in the boxing ring. Relax with friends on the lux open decks of the  Dockhouse . Soak up a sunset high above the ocean in the  Athletic Club . Stay up way too late in the  Manor , try your luck in the casino, and top it all off by raiding the galley late at night.

There’s a setting for everything and an abundance of new experiences waiting for you to explore. And all of it beautifully made for Atlantis and the way we play.

Serious Eats. Always Included.

All restaurants, with a caption indicating which one they are.Forget everything you know about dining at sea and indulge in a world where 18 different eateries cater to every taste and style. And forget extra charges for “specialty” dining since all food is included at every restaurant.

There’s no big dining hall where you have to queue up for a meal. Virgin’s innovative booking system lets you plan dinner where you want, when you want, with friends old and new. Atlantis will enhance our tradition of shared dining with options to meet new friends at every meal, or to dine on your own. It’s your choice and easier than ever. All with no dress code, of course.

If you’re in the mood for authentic Italian,  Extra Virgin  will hit the spot with a lively setting and mix of classic and contemporary options. Or share something different at  Gunbae , the first real Korean BBQ at sea!

Let the masterful chefs at  Test Kitchen  wow you with a modern tasting menu in a sleek food-lab setting. Indulge in modern Mexican at  Pink Agave , where festive drinks match outrageously delicious food.

Relax with a mezze platter and cocktail on the open decks of  The Dock  or indulge in a perfect steak in the sleek and sexy dining room of  The Wake  below.

For all-day fare with abundant vegetarian options, the bold  Razzle Dazzle  satisfies in new and delicious ways. You’ll be faced with even more choices at  The Galley , Virgin’s take on the food hall featuring everything from tacos to poke to ramen and plenty more in between. On top of all that you’ll find freshly made pizza, fabulous ice cream, an authentic coffee house, and so much more throughout the ship.

In case you think we missed it, there’s no buffet. Just an abundance of fabulous choices including a few surprises. And yes, excellent options are available round the clock!

Fabulously Showy Venues

The transformational  Red Room  boasts movable seating and a flexible stage to create unique settings for Virgin’s wildly inventive production shows and Atlantis’ legendary performers. You’ll have to see it to believe it, and stick around later when we transform it into a spectacular late-night venue.

Named after Richard Branson’s first recording studio,  The Manor  hosts the interactive Another Rose show, and transforms into an intimate performance space for Atlantis drag queens, cabaret stars, and specialty acts. Featuring three bars, two stories, and plenty of space to dance!

Arrive Better Than You Left

Sweat, relax or just be still and breathe — it’s up to you. Virgin’s wellness and personal style spaces provide a proper dose of Vitamin Sea to leave you totally restored and ready for anything and everything. A state-of-the-art Technogym lineup stands ready for your moves in  Build and Balance , while the  Training Camp  offers unlimited (and always included) group fitness classes unlike anything else at sea.

Wake up to sunrise yoga high above the ocean in  The Perch  or run with a view on the outdoor track.

The sleek and inviting  Redemption Spa  has just what you need to make your day perfect. Revitalize with an innovative treatment, or take in all the thermal suite has to offer. And for the ideal touch up,  Stubble & Groom  is a man’s haven that will get you in ship-shape, British style.

A New Way to Stay

Superyacht inspired stateroom design offers much more than a place to sleep. Virgin’s clever room technology and styling provide the ultimate hideaway at sea. Transform your room at the touch of a button. Mood-matching lights, a configurable and comfortable Seabed and in-cabin tech come together to make your life easier. Lounge by day, with plenty of room for friends, yet easy to convert to a bed for those times when you really do want to sleep!

If you’re looking for the suite life, Virgin’s Rockstar quarters will bring you the lifestyle you deserve. Accents of brass, stunning marble bathrooms, spacious stargazing terraces, champagne tables and exclusive treatment are yours in these VIP suites. Add a host of amenities including unlimited bar tab (for mega-Rockstar suites) for the ultimate in comfort and style!

Booking a suite unlocks access to Richard’s Rooftop; the exclusive deck where elegance meets exuberance. A lavish, elaborate and members-only outdoor space for stargazing parties and pre-dinner cocktail hours for you and the other rockstars.

There are currently no extensions for this cruise.

DAY 1 - MARCH 16: San Juan, Puerto Rico (Depart 8:30pm)

DAY 2 - MARCH 17: Epic Day at Sea

DAY 3 - MARCH 18: Oranjestad, Aruba (Arrive 9:00am - Depart 11:59pm)

DAY 4 - MARCH 19: Willemstad, Curacao (Arrive 9:00am - Depart 11:59pm)

DAY 5 - MARCH 20: Relaxing Day at Sea

DAY 6 - MARCH 21: Martinique (Arrive 9:00am - Depart 7:00pm)

DAY 7 - MARCH 22: Basseterre, St Kitts (Arrive 8:00am - Depart 5:00pm)

DAY 8 - MARCH 23: San Juan, Puerto Rico (Arrive 7:00am)

Bookings for the  Virgin Exotic Southern Caribbean Cruise 2024 ranges from $1, 799 to $1,099 staterooms. Please contact us directly at [email protected] or +17132530041 for real-time availability of spaces and for reservations.

Corey Colfer

Kim and  Alan  go to great lengths to ensure that anything and everything you need is available for you. The locations are stunning, luxe accommodations, world class entertainment, and exciting excursions at every destination.  Just when you think it can’t get any better, it does!  In Puerto Vallarta that means international cabaret stars performing for us, poolside and unplugged.  With Concierge Travel I know I will have an amazing experience full of laughter and friends, both old and new.  I think I look forward to seeing my Concierge family as much as the fabulous destinations.

We're still the One!

Caribbean Cruise 2023 by VACAYA

New! Istanbul to Athens Cruise

Pure Luxury. Awesome Destinations

We’ve crafted an incredible voyage next summer on one of the world’s most luxurious ships sailing from Istanbul to Athens to some of the most fascinating destinations in the world. Our far-reaching itinerary spans the magic of Turkey to the diversity of Cyprus. Visit the pyramids of Egypt or bask on the beaches of Mykonos. There’s never been an Atlantis cruise like this! Very limited availability for just 1200 very lucky guests.

30 Years at Club Atlantis Cancun - SOLD OUT!

The Ultimate Gay Resort Week

Atlantis returns to our longest-running resort to celebrate our 30th year taking over the magnificent Club Med Cancun! We’re pulling out all the stops with a vibrant new entertainment program, enhanced party experiences, and all the fun that makes Club Atlantis a hit year after year. Come play with us on some of the world’s most beautiful beaches! Great deals from just $1669 with virtually everything included.

Two Epic New Med Cruises - SOLD OUT!

Sail Virgin’s Spectacular Resilient Lady Next Summer

Get onboard the most modern ship in the world for your choice of two awesome journeys next August! We’re sailing from Athens to Barcelona for 9 nights packed with thrills, followed by a 10-night voyage from Barcelona to London designed for exploration. It’s our biggest summer event yet, on the sensational new Virgin Resilient Lady.

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Istanbul to Athens Cruise

July 17 - 24, 2024 Oceania Riviera

Explore more than ever with our most exotic new all-gay cruise from Istanbul to Athens on the luxurious Oceania Riviera. Our non-stop adventure takes you to Egypt’s pyramids, Crete's treasures, the fascinating culture of Cyprus, and a day to play in Mykonos. It’s seven days of true sensory overload custom designed for 1200 very lucky guests, ready to be dazzled by Atlantis’ thrilling performers and Oceania’s legendary food and service.

Athens to Barcelona Cruise

August 4 - 13, 2024 Virgin Voyages Resilient Lady

SOLD OUT! Island-hop through five countries next summer with an all-new sailing from Athens to Barcelona on Virgin Voyages sensational new Resilient Lady. In nine action-packed nights you’ll explore Mykonos, Turkey, Malta, Sicily, Corsica, Capri, and Mallorca with 2700 guys from around the world. Sail the Med with the perfect mix of exotic exploration, spectacular entertainment, outrageous parties, and great friends onboard the newest and most welcoming ship in the world. Featuring eye-popping design, incredible fully-included dining, superior service and so much more. All from just $1499 -- our best deal ever to the Med!

Barcelona to London Cruise

August 13 - 23, 2024 Virgin Voyages Resilient Lady

SOLD OUT! Experience more than ever on our all-new Barcelona to London cruise aboard Virgin Voyages sensational new Resilient Lady. Journey between Europe’s gay capitals of Barcelona and London to explore the streets of Seville, Lisbon’s magical harbor, the vineyards of Bordeaux and so much more. All during the height of summer to create the perfect blend of amazing destinations, sensational entertainment, welcoming parties, and great friends. Featuring eye-popping design, incredible fully-included dining, superior service and so much more.

Halloween San Diego to Mexico Cruise

Oct 26 - Nov 2, 2024 Holland America Line MS Koningsdam

Halloween sizzles in 2024 when Atlantis returns to San Diego to sail the gorgeous Koningsdam to Mexico’s best beaches including Puerto Vallarta, Cabo San Lucas, and Mazatlan. An epic week of outrageous parties, sizzling entertainment, and nonstop fun awaits our 2500 guys from around the world. It’s our easiest and friendliest cruise of the year, with amazing low fares from just $779!

All Gay Resorts

Club Atlantis Cancun

Apr 27 - May 4, 2024 Club Med Cancun

SOLD OUT! Atlantis returns to Club Med Cancun for the ultimate all-gay beach resort. Join 750 friends on our most active vacation, featuring everything from private white sand beaches to thrilling sports (try the Flying Trapeze or BootCamp) to endless entertainment. All in a completely comfortable, welcoming environment. Best of all, our all-inclusive fares include absolutely everything (even drinks!) for one low price. It’s the best value in gay vacations.

Fun in unexpected ways with friends old and new. Always smiling, sometimes silly. It's the way we play.

The best parties on land or sea, with outrageous themes and world-class productions for every musical taste.

Stellar entertainment from our community and beyond. From superstars to soon-to-be-stars.

Awesome experiences in the world's most exciting destinations.

For over 30 years, Atlantis Events has hosted iconic all-gay vacations in some of the most stunning and exotic places on the planet. What started as a “gay week on the beach with friends” has since turned into the largest gay-owned company in the world dedicated to creating unique vacations for LGBTQ travelers. Today, we host more than 20,000 guests a year, but we’re still dedicated to creating a welcoming community of passionate, like-minded people, where travelers can relax, be themselves, have fun, meet new friends, and learn new things.

Each Atlantis cruise or resort offers a carefree experience based around friendship, camaraderie, relaxation, indulgence, adventure, and pure uninhibited fun. Beautiful locations, fantastic entertainment and legendary parties set the the stage for the magic that happens when a diverse group comes together and everyone is free to be themselves.

That’s the way we play, and it’s why our guests return year after year. So what are you waiting for? Experience Atlantis for yourself.

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Key West & Perfect Day

CELEBRITY REFLECTION

• Fort Lauderdale, Florida
• Key West, Florida
• Perfect Day at CocoCay, Bahamas

AVG PER PERSON*

Starting price in USD, valid for Sep 02, 2024 +Taxes, fees and port expenses $151.57 USD*

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8 - Day Southern Caribbean from Miami, FL

Cruise itinerary.

Day 1: Miami

Day 2 & 3: Fun Day at Sea

Day 4: aruba, day 5: bonaire, day 6: la romana, day 7: amber cove.

Day 8: Fun Day at Sea

Day 9: miami.

Get to Know Carnival Horizon

The line that brings the sea and the sky together inspired us... to build a ship that unites you with great fun, comfort, dining and exotic destinations. And most importantly, unites you with one another. It's Carnival Horizon! This ship doesn't just do it a little bit, either. First, Carnival Horizon goes big with the two-screen Carnival Multiplex ® , which brings together one theater packed with huge IMAX ® action and one with 3D visuals, incredible motion effects and more! This ship keeps things flowing with an onboard waterpark that splashes you more than a little — Dr. Seuss WaterWorks ™ splashes you oodles, with a little help from the wacky characters everybody loves. Go for a bike ride way, way above it all at SkyRide ® . The Punchliner Comedy Club ™ and Playlist Productions ™ are just two of your top onboard entertainment picks, and they’re both focused on uniting you with unforgettable performances up on stage. For relaxation, get to Serenity Adult-Only Retreat ™ , or step up to max relaxation at Cloud 9 Spa ™ featuring great massages, thermal suites and more. Havana Bar ™ & Pool is a good one too — a spot that brings together stylish poolside lounging with authentically Cuban cocktails... adding hot nightlife into the mix once the sun goes down. And all day long, you know we've got stuff for the kids — Carnival Horizon has three age-specific youth spaces! This ship brings tons of flavor to every meal. It starts with a guy named Guy — Fieri — who created two awesome spots on the ship: one's the crowd-pleasing Guy's Burger Joint ™ , and the other happens to be Guy's Pig & Anchor Smokehouse | Brewhouse ™ , a spot that serves up BBQ classics paired with freshly-brewed-right-on-board beers. If you're looking for great seafood on Carnival Horizon, then Seafood Shack ™ 's the place to cast your net. Bonsai Teppanyaki ™ is an intimate meal and interactive performance, while Fahrenheit 555 ™ is a dining experience that stands toe-to-toe with some of the best steakhouses on land. Jiji Asian Kitchen ® and Cucina del Capitano ® each specialize in delighting certain taste buds: the ones craving pan-Asian favorites, and classic Italian dishes served family-style. (Check... and check!) Add all this together and you've got... a vacation on Carnival Horizon that truly brings it all together.

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Crying Myself to Sleep on the Biggest Cruise Ship Ever

Seven agonizing nights aboard the Icon of the Seas

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Updated at 2:44 p.m. ET on April 6, 2024.

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MY FIRST GLIMPSE of Royal Caribbean’s Icon of the Seas, from the window of an approaching Miami cab, brings on a feeling of vertigo, nausea, amazement, and distress. I shut my eyes in defense, as my brain tells my optic nerve to try again.

The ship makes no sense, vertically or horizontally. It makes no sense on sea, or on land, or in outer space. It looks like a hodgepodge of domes and minarets, tubes and canopies, like Istanbul had it been designed by idiots. Vibrant, oversignifying colors are stacked upon other such colors, decks perched over still more decks; the only comfort is a row of lifeboats ringing its perimeter. There is no imposed order, no cogent thought, and, for those who do not harbor a totalitarian sense of gigantomania, no visual mercy. This is the biggest cruise ship ever built, and I have been tasked with witnessing its inaugural voyage.

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“Author embarks on their first cruise-ship voyage” has been a staple of American essay writing for almost three decades, beginning with David Foster Wallace’s “A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again,” which was first published in 1996 under the title “Shipping Out.” Since then, many admirable writers have widened and diversified the genre. Usually the essayist commissioned to take to the sea is in their first or second flush of youth and is ready to sharpen their wit against the hull of the offending vessel. I am 51, old and tired, having seen much of the world as a former travel journalist, and mostly what I do in both life and prose is shrug while muttering to my imaginary dachshund, “This too shall pass.” But the Icon of the Seas will not countenance a shrug. The Icon of the Seas is the Linda Loman of cruise ships, exclaiming that attention must be paid. And here I am in late January with my one piece of luggage and useless gray winter jacket and passport, zipping through the Port of Miami en route to the gangway that will separate me from the bulk of North America for more than seven days, ready to pay it in full.

The aforementioned gangway opens up directly onto a thriving mall (I will soon learn it is imperiously called the “Royal Promenade”), presently filled with yapping passengers beneath a ceiling studded with balloons ready to drop. Crew members from every part of the global South, as well as a few Balkans, are shepherding us along while pressing flutes of champagne into our hands. By a humming Starbucks, I drink as many of these as I can and prepare to find my cabin. I show my blue Suite Sky SeaPass Card (more on this later, much more) to a smiling woman from the Philippines, and she tells me to go “aft.” Which is where, now? As someone who has rarely sailed on a vessel grander than the Staten Island Ferry, I am confused. It turns out that the aft is the stern of the ship, or, for those of us who don’t know what a stern or an aft are, its ass. The nose of the ship, responsible for separating the waves before it, is also called a bow, and is marked for passengers as the FWD , or forward. The part of the contemporary sailing vessel where the malls are clustered is called the midship. I trust that you have enjoyed this nautical lesson.

I ascend via elevator to my suite on Deck 11. This is where I encounter my first terrible surprise. My suite windows and balcony do not face the ocean. Instead, they look out onto another shopping mall. This mall is the one that’s called Central Park, perhaps in homage to the Olmsted-designed bit of greenery in the middle of my hometown. Although on land I would be delighted to own a suite with Central Park views, here I am deeply depressed. To sail on a ship and not wake up to a vast blue carpet of ocean? Unthinkable.

Allow me a brief preamble here. The story you are reading was commissioned at a moment when most staterooms on the Icon were sold out. In fact, so enthralled by the prospect of this voyage were hard-core mariners that the ship’s entire inventory of guest rooms (the Icon can accommodate up to 7,600 passengers, but its inaugural journey was reduced to 5,000 or so for a less crowded experience) was almost immediately sold out. Hence, this publication was faced with the shocking prospect of paying nearly $19,000 to procure for this solitary passenger an entire suite—not including drinking expenses—all for the privilege of bringing you this article. But the suite in question doesn’t even have a view of the ocean! I sit down hard on my soft bed. Nineteen thousand dollars for this .

The viewless suite does have its pluses. In addition to all the Malin+Goetz products in my dual bathrooms, I am granted use of a dedicated Suite Deck lounge; access to Coastal Kitchen, a superior restaurant for Suites passengers; complimentary VOOM SM Surf & Stream (“the fastest Internet at Sea”) “for one device per person for the whole cruise duration”; a pair of bathrobes (one of which comes prestained with what looks like a large expectoration by the greenest lizard on Earth); and use of the Grove Suite Sun, an area on Decks 18 and 19 with food and deck chairs reserved exclusively for Suite passengers. I also get reserved seating for a performance of The Wizard of Oz , an ice-skating tribute to the periodic table, and similar provocations. The very color of my Suite Sky SeaPass Card, an oceanic blue as opposed to the cloying royal purple of the standard non-Suite passenger, will soon provoke envy and admiration. But as high as my status may be, there are those on board who have much higher status still, and I will soon learn to bow before them.

In preparation for sailing, I have “priced in,” as they say on Wall Street, the possibility that I may come from a somewhat different monde than many of the other cruisers. Without falling into stereotypes or preconceptions, I prepare myself for a friendly outspokenness on the part of my fellow seafarers that may not comply with modern DEI standards. I believe in meeting people halfway, and so the day before flying down to Miami, I visited what remains of Little Italy to purchase a popular T-shirt that reads DADDY’S LITTLE MEATBALL across the breast in the colors of the Italian flag. My wife recommended that I bring one of my many T-shirts featuring Snoopy and the Peanuts gang, as all Americans love the beagle and his friends. But I naively thought that my meatball T-shirt would be more suitable for conversation-starting. “Oh, and who is your ‘daddy’?” some might ask upon seeing it. “And how long have you been his ‘little meatball’?” And so on.

I put on my meatball T-shirt and head for one of the dining rooms to get a late lunch. In the elevator, I stick out my chest for all to read the funny legend upon it, but soon I realize that despite its burnished tricolor letters, no one takes note. More to the point, no one takes note of me. Despite my attempts at bridge building, the very sight of me (small, ethnic, without a cap bearing the name of a football team) elicits no reaction from other passengers. Most often, they will small-talk over me as if I don’t exist. This brings to mind the travails of David Foster Wallace , who felt so ostracized by his fellow passengers that he retreated to his cabin for much of his voyage. And Wallace was raised primarily in the Midwest and was a much larger, more American-looking meatball than I am. If he couldn’t talk to these people, how will I? What if I leave this ship without making any friends at all, despite my T-shirt? I am a social creature, and the prospect of seven days alone and apart is saddening. Wallace’s stateroom, at least, had a view of the ocean, a kind of cheap eternity.

Worse awaits me in the dining room. This is a large, multichandeliered room where I attended my safety training (I was shown how to put on a flotation vest; it is a very simple procedure). But the maître d’ politely refuses me entry in an English that seems to verge on another language. “I’m sorry, this is only for pendejos ,” he seems to be saying. I push back politely and he repeats himself. Pendejos ? Piranhas? There’s some kind of P-word to which I am not attuned. Meanwhile elderly passengers stream right past, powered by their limbs, walkers, and electric wheelchairs. “It is only pendejo dining today, sir.” “But I have a suite!” I say, already starting to catch on to the ship’s class system. He examines my card again. “But you are not a pendejo ,” he confirms. I am wearing a DADDY’S LITTLE MEATBALL T-shirt, I want to say to him. I am the essence of pendejo .

Eventually, I give up and head to the plebeian buffet on Deck 15, which has an aquatic-styled name I have now forgotten. Before gaining entry to this endless cornucopia of reheated food, one passes a washing station of many sinks and soap dispensers, and perhaps the most intriguing character on the entire ship. He is Mr. Washy Washy—or, according to his name tag, Nielbert of the Philippines—and he is dressed as a taco (on other occasions, I’ll see him dressed as a burger). Mr. Washy Washy performs an eponymous song in spirited, indeed flamboyant English: “Washy, washy, wash your hands, WASHY WASHY!” The dangers of norovirus and COVID on a cruise ship this size (a giant fellow ship was stricken with the former right after my voyage) makes Mr. Washy Washy an essential member of the crew. The problem lies with the food at the end of Washy’s rainbow. The buffet is groaning with what sounds like sophisticated dishes—marinated octopus, boiled egg with anchovy, chorizo, lobster claws—but every animal tastes tragically the same, as if there was only one creature available at the market, a “cruisipus” bred specifically for Royal Caribbean dining. The “vegetables” are no better. I pick up a tomato slice and look right through it. It tastes like cellophane. I sit alone, apart from the couples and parents with gaggles of children, as “We Are Family” echoes across the buffet space.

I may have failed to mention that all this time, the Icon of the Seas has not left port. As the fiery mango of the subtropical setting sun makes Miami’s condo skyline even more apocalyptic, the ship shoves off beneath a perfunctory display of fireworks. After the sun sets, in the far, dark distance, another circus-lit cruise ship ruptures the waves before us. We glance at it with pity, because it is by definition a smaller ship than our own. I am on Deck 15, outside the buffet and overlooking a bunch of pools (the Icon has seven of them), drinking a frilly drink that I got from one of the bars (the Icon has 15 of them), still too shy to speak to anyone, despite Sister Sledge’s assertion that all on the ship are somehow related.

Kim Brooks: On failing the family vacation

The ship’s passage away from Ron DeSantis’s Florida provides no frisson, no sense of developing “sea legs,” as the ship is too large to register the presence of waves unless a mighty wind adds significant chop. It is time for me to register the presence of the 5,000 passengers around me, even if they refuse to register mine. My fellow travelers have prepared for this trip with personally decorated T-shirts celebrating the importance of this voyage. The simplest ones say ICON INAUGURAL ’24 on the back and the family name on the front. Others attest to an over-the-top love of cruise ships: WARNING! MAY START TALKING ABOUT CRUISING . Still others are artisanally designed and celebrate lifetimes spent married while cruising (on ships, of course). A couple possibly in their 90s are wearing shirts whose backs feature a drawing of a cruise liner, two flamingos with ostensibly male and female characteristics, and the legend “ HUSBAND AND WIFE Cruising Partners FOR LIFE WE MAY NOT HAVE IT All Together BUT TOGETHER WE HAVE IT ALL .” (The words not in all caps have been written in cursive.) A real journalist or a more intrepid conversationalist would have gone up to the couple and asked them to explain the longevity of their marriage vis-à-vis their love of cruising. But instead I head to my mall suite, take off my meatball T-shirt, and allow the first tears of the cruise to roll down my cheeks slowly enough that I briefly fall asleep amid the moisture and salt.

I WAKE UP with a hangover. Oh God. Right. I cannot believe all of that happened last night. A name floats into my cobwebbed, nauseated brain: “Ayn Rand.” Jesus Christ.

I breakfast alone at the Coastal Kitchen. The coffee tastes fine and the eggs came out of a bird. The ship rolls slightly this morning; I can feel it in my thighs and my schlong, the parts of me that are most receptive to danger.

I had a dangerous conversation last night. After the sun set and we were at least 50 miles from shore (most modern cruise ships sail at about 23 miles an hour), I lay in bed softly hiccupping, my arms stretched out exactly like Jesus on the cross, the sound of the distant waves missing from my mall-facing suite, replaced by the hum of air-conditioning and children shouting in Spanish through the vents of my two bathrooms. I decided this passivity was unacceptable. As an immigrant, I feel duty-bound to complete the tasks I am paid for, which means reaching out and trying to understand my fellow cruisers. So I put on a normal James Perse T-shirt and headed for one of the bars on the Royal Promenade—the Schooner Bar, it was called, if memory serves correctly.

I sat at the bar for a martini and two Negronis. An old man with thick, hairy forearms drank next to me, very silent and Hemingwaylike, while a dreadlocked piano player tinkled out a series of excellent Elton John covers. To my right, a young white couple—he in floral shorts, she in a light, summery miniskirt with a fearsome diamond ring, neither of them in football regalia—chatted with an elderly couple. Do it , I commanded myself. Open your mouth. Speak! Speak without being spoken to. Initiate. A sentence fragment caught my ear from the young woman, “Cherry Hill.” This is a suburb of Philadelphia in New Jersey, and I had once been there for a reading at a synagogue. “Excuse me,” I said gently to her. “Did you just mention Cherry Hill? It’s a lovely place.”

As it turned out, the couple now lived in Fort Lauderdale (the number of Floridians on the cruise surprised me, given that Southern Florida is itself a kind of cruise ship, albeit one slowly sinking), but soon they were talking with me exclusively—the man potbellied, with a chin like a hard-boiled egg; the woman as svelte as if she were one of the many Ukrainian members of the crew—the elderly couple next to them forgotten. This felt as groundbreaking as the first time I dared to address an American in his native tongue, as a child on a bus in Queens (“On my foot you are standing, Mister”).

“I don’t want to talk politics,” the man said. “But they’re going to eighty-six Biden and put Michelle in.”

I considered the contradictions of his opening conversational gambit, but decided to play along. “People like Michelle,” I said, testing the waters. The husband sneered, but the wife charitably put forward that the former first lady was “more personable” than Joe Biden. “They’re gonna eighty-six Biden,” the husband repeated. “He can’t put a sentence together.”

After I mentioned that I was a writer—though I presented myself as a writer of teleplays instead of novels and articles such as this one—the husband told me his favorite writer was Ayn Rand. “Ayn Rand, she came here with nothing,” the husband said. “I work with a lot of Cubans, so …” I wondered if I should mention what I usually do to ingratiate myself with Republicans or libertarians: the fact that my finances improved after pass-through corporations were taxed differently under Donald Trump. Instead, I ordered another drink and the couple did the same, and I told him that Rand and I were born in the same city, St. Petersburg/Leningrad, and that my family also came here with nothing. Now the bonding and drinking began in earnest, and several more rounds appeared. Until it all fell apart.

Read: Gary Shteyngart on watching Russian television for five days straight

My new friend, whom I will refer to as Ayn, called out to a buddy of his across the bar, and suddenly a young couple, both covered in tattoos, appeared next to us. “He fucking punked me,” Ayn’s frat-boy-like friend called out as he put his arm around Ayn, while his sizable partner sizzled up to Mrs. Rand. Both of them had a look I have never seen on land—their eyes projecting absence and enmity in equal measure. In the ’90s, I drank with Russian soldiers fresh from Chechnya and wandered the streets of wartime Zagreb, but I have never seen such undisguised hostility toward both me and perhaps the universe at large. I was briefly introduced to this psychopathic pair, but neither of them wanted to have anything to do with me, and the tattooed woman would not even reveal her Christian name to me (she pretended to have the same first name as Mrs. Rand). To impress his tattooed friends, Ayn made fun of the fact that as a television writer, I’d worked on the series Succession (which, it would turn out, practically nobody on the ship had watched), instead of the far more palatable, in his eyes, zombie drama of last year. And then my new friends drifted away from me into an angry private conversation—“He punked me!”—as I ordered another drink for myself, scared of the dead-eyed arrivals whose gaze never registered in the dim wattage of the Schooner Bar, whose terrifying voices and hollow laughs grated like unoiled gears against the crooning of “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.”

But today is a new day for me and my hangover. After breakfast, I explore the ship’s so-called neighborhoods . There’s the AquaDome, where one can find a food hall and an acrobatic sound-and-light aquatic show. Central Park has a premium steak house, a sushi joint, and a used Rolex that can be bought for $8,000 on land here proudly offered at $17,000. There’s the aforementioned Royal Promenade, where I had drunk with the Rands, and where a pair of dueling pianos duel well into the night. There’s Surfside, a kids’ neighborhood full of sugary garbage, which looks out onto the frothy trail that the behemoth leaves behind itself. Thrill Island refers to the collection of tubes that clutter the ass of the ship and offer passengers six waterslides and a surfing simulation. There’s the Hideaway, an adult zone that plays music from a vomit-slathered, Brit-filled Alicante nightclub circa 1996 and proves a big favorite with groups of young Latin American customers. And, most hurtfully, there’s the Suite Neighborhood.

I say hurtfully because as a Suite passenger I should be here, though my particular suite is far from the others. Whereas I am stuck amid the riffraff of Deck 11, this section is on the highborn Decks 16 and 17, and in passing, I peek into the spacious, tall-ceilinged staterooms from the hallway, dazzled by the glint of the waves and sun. For $75,000, one multifloor suite even comes with its own slide between floors, so that a family may enjoy this particular terror in private. There is a quiet splendor to the Suite Neighborhood. I see fewer stickers and signs and drawings than in my own neighborhood—for example, MIKE AND DIANA PROUDLY SERVED U.S. MARINE CORPS RETIRED . No one here needs to announce their branch of service or rank; they are simply Suites, and this is where they belong. Once again, despite my hard work and perseverance, I have been disallowed from the true American elite. Once again, I am “Not our class, dear.” I am reminded of watching The Love Boat on my grandmother’s Zenith, which either was given to her or we found in the trash (I get our many malfunctioning Zeniths confused) and whose tube got so hot, I would put little chunks of government cheese on a thin tissue atop it to give our welfare treat a pleasant, Reagan-era gooeyness. I could not understand English well enough then to catch the nuances of that seafaring program, but I knew that there were differences in the status of the passengers, and that sometimes those differences made them sad. Still, this ship, this plenty—every few steps, there are complimentary nachos or milkshakes or gyros on offer—was the fatty fuel of my childhood dreams. If only I had remained a child.

I walk around the outdoor decks looking for company. There is a middle-aged African American couple who always seem to be asleep in each other’s arms, probably exhausted from the late capitalism they regularly encounter on land. There is far more diversity on this ship than I expected. Many couples are a testament to Loving v. Virginia , and there is a large group of folks whose T-shirts read MELANIN AT SEA / IT’S THE MELANIN FOR ME . I smile when I see them, but then some young kids from the group makes Mr. Washy Washy do a cruel, caricatured “Burger Dance” (today he is in his burger getup), and I think, Well, so much for intersectionality .

At the infinity pool on Deck 17, I spot some elderly women who could be ethnic and from my part of the world, and so I jump in. I am proved correct! Many of them seem to be originally from Queens (“Corona was still great when it was all Italian”), though they are now spread across the tristate area. We bond over the way “Ron-kon-koma” sounds when announced in Penn Station.

“Everyone is here for a different reason,” one of them tells me. She and her ex-husband last sailed together four years ago to prove to themselves that their marriage was truly over. Her 15-year-old son lost his virginity to “an Irish young lady” while their ship was moored in Ravenna, Italy. The gaggle of old-timers competes to tell me their favorite cruising stories and tips. “A guy proposed in Central Park a couple of years ago”—many Royal Caribbean ships apparently have this ridiculous communal area—“and she ran away screaming!” “If you’re diamond-class, you get four drinks for free.” “A different kind of passenger sails out of Bayonne.” (This, perhaps, is racially coded.) “Sometimes, if you tip the bartender $5, your next drink will be free.”

“Everyone’s here for a different reason,” the woman whose marriage ended on a cruise tells me again. “Some people are here for bad reasons—the drinkers and the gamblers. Some people are here for medical reasons.” I have seen more than a few oxygen tanks and at least one woman clearly undergoing very serious chemo. Some T-shirts celebrate good news about a cancer diagnosis. This might be someone’s last cruise or week on Earth. For these women, who have spent months, if not years, at sea, cruising is a ritual as well as a life cycle: first love, last love, marriage, divorce, death.

Read: The last place on Earth any tourist should go

I have talked with these women for so long, tonight I promise myself that after a sad solitary dinner I will not try to seek out company at the bars in the mall or the adult-themed Hideaway. I have enough material to fulfill my duties to this publication. As I approach my orphaned suite, I run into the aggro young people who stole Mr. and Mrs. Rand away from me the night before. The tattooed apparitions pass me without a glance. She is singing something violent about “Stuttering Stanley” (a character in a popular horror movie, as I discover with my complimentary VOOM SM Surf & Stream Internet at Sea) and he’s loudly shouting about “all the money I’ve lost,” presumably at the casino in the bowels of the ship.

So these bent psychos out of a Cormac McCarthy novel are angrily inhabiting my deck. As I mewl myself to sleep, I envision a limited series for HBO or some other streamer, a kind of low-rent White Lotus , where several aggressive couples conspire to throw a shy intellectual interloper overboard. I type the scenario into my phone. As I fall asleep, I think of what the woman who recently divorced her husband and whose son became a man through the good offices of the Irish Republic told me while I was hoisting myself out of the infinity pool. “I’m here because I’m an explorer. I’m here because I’m trying something new.” What if I allowed myself to believe in her fantasy?

“YOU REALLY STARTED AT THE TOP,” they tell me. I’m at the Coastal Kitchen for my eggs and corned-beef hash, and the maître d’ has slotted me in between two couples. Fueled by coffee or perhaps intrigued by my relative youth, they strike up a conversation with me. As always, people are shocked that this is my first cruise. They contrast the Icon favorably with all the preceding liners in the Royal Caribbean fleet, usually commenting on the efficiency of the elevators that hurl us from deck to deck (as in many large corporate buildings, the elevators ask you to choose a floor and then direct you to one of many lifts). The couple to my right, from Palo Alto—he refers to his “porn mustache” and calls his wife “my cougar” because she is two years older—tell me they are “Pandemic Pinnacles.”

This is the day that my eyes will be opened. Pinnacles , it is explained to me over translucent cantaloupe, have sailed with Royal Caribbean for 700 ungodly nights. Pandemic Pinnacles took advantage of the two-for-one accrual rate of Pinnacle points during the pandemic, when sailing on a cruise ship was even more ill-advised, to catapult themselves into Pinnacle status.

Because of the importance of the inaugural voyage of the world’s largest cruise liner, more than 200 Pinnacles are on this ship, a startling number, it seems. Mrs. Palo Alto takes out a golden badge that I have seen affixed over many a breast, which reads CROWN AND ANCHOR SOCIETY along with her name. This is the coveted badge of the Pinnacle. “You should hear all the whining in Guest Services,” her husband tells me. Apparently, the Pinnacles who are not also Suites like us are all trying to use their status to get into Coastal Kitchen, our elite restaurant. Even a Pinnacle needs to be a Suite to access this level of corned-beef hash.

“We’re just baby Pinnacles,” Mrs. Palo Alto tells me, describing a kind of internal class struggle among the Pinnacle elite for ever higher status.

And now I understand what the maître d’ was saying to me on the first day of my cruise. He wasn’t saying “ pendejo .” He was saying “Pinnacle.” The dining room was for Pinnacles only, all those older people rolling in like the tide on their motorized scooters.

And now I understand something else: This whole thing is a cult. And like most cults, it can’t help but mirror the endless American fight for status. Like Keith Raniere’s NXIVM, where different-colored sashes were given out to connote rank among Raniere’s branded acolytes, this is an endless competition among Pinnacles, Suites, Diamond-Plusers, and facing-the-mall, no-balcony purple SeaPass Card peasants, not to mention the many distinctions within each category. The more you cruise, the higher your status. No wonder a section of the Royal Promenade is devoted to getting passengers to book their next cruise during the one they should be enjoying now. No wonder desperate Royal Caribbean offers (“FINAL HOURS”) crowded my email account weeks before I set sail. No wonder the ship’s jewelry store, the Royal Bling, is selling a $100,000 golden chalice that will entitle its owner to drink free on Royal Caribbean cruises for life. (One passenger was already gaming out whether her 28-year-old son was young enough to “just about earn out” on the chalice or if that ship had sailed.) No wonder this ship was sold out months before departure , and we had to pay $19,000 for a horrid suite away from the Suite Neighborhood. No wonder the most mythical hero of Royal Caribbean lore is someone named Super Mario, who has cruised so often, he now has his own working desk on many ships. This whole experience is part cult, part nautical pyramid scheme.

From the June 2014 issue: Ship of wonks

“The toilets are amazing,” the Palo Altos are telling me. “One flush and you’re done.” “They don’t understand how energy-efficient these ships are,” the husband of the other couple is telling me. “They got the LNG”—liquefied natural gas, which is supposed to make the Icon a boon to the environment (a concept widely disputed and sometimes ridiculed by environmentalists).

But I’m thinking along a different line of attack as I spear my last pallid slice of melon. For my streaming limited series, a Pinnacle would have to get killed by either an outright peasant or a Suite without an ocean view. I tell my breakfast companions my idea.

“Oh, for sure a Pinnacle would have to be killed,” Mr. Palo Alto, the Pandemic Pinnacle, says, touching his porn mustache thoughtfully as his wife nods.

“THAT’S RIGHT, IT’S your time, buddy!” Hubert, my fun-loving Panamanian cabin attendant, shouts as I step out of my suite in a robe. “Take it easy, buddy!”

I have come up with a new dressing strategy. Instead of trying to impress with my choice of T-shirts, I have decided to start wearing a robe, as one does at a resort property on land, with a proper spa and hammam. The response among my fellow cruisers has been ecstatic. “Look at you in the robe!” Mr. Rand cries out as we pass each other by the Thrill Island aqua park. “You’re living the cruise life! You know, you really drank me under the table that night.” I laugh as we part ways, but my soul cries out, Please spend more time with me, Mr. and Mrs. Rand; I so need the company .

In my white robe, I am a stately presence, a refugee from a better limited series, a one-man crossover episode. (Only Suites are granted these robes to begin with.) Today, I will try many of the activities these ships have on offer to provide their clientele with a sense of never-ceasing motion. Because I am already at Thrill Island, I decide to climb the staircase to what looks like a mast on an old-fashioned ship (terrified, because I am afraid of heights) to try a ride called “Storm Chasers,” which is part of the “Category 6” water park, named in honor of one of the storms that may someday do away with the Port of Miami entirely. Storm Chasers consists of falling from the “mast” down a long, twisting neon tube filled with water, like being the camera inside your own colonoscopy, as you hold on to the handles of a mat, hoping not to die. The tube then flops you down headfirst into a trough of water, a Royal Caribbean baptism. It both knocks my breath out and makes me sad.

In keeping with the aquatic theme, I attend a show at the AquaDome. To the sound of “Live and Let Die,” a man in a harness gyrates to and fro in the sultry air. I saw something very similar in the back rooms of the famed Berghain club in early-aughts Berlin. Soon another harnessed man is gyrating next to the first. Ja , I think to myself, I know how this ends. Now will come the fisting , natürlich . But the show soon devolves into the usual Marvel-film-grade nonsense, with too much light and sound signifying nichts . If any fisting is happening, it is probably in the Suite Neighborhood, inside a cabin marked with an upside-down pineapple, which I understand means a couple are ready to swing, and I will see none of it.

I go to the ice show, which is a kind of homage—if that’s possible—to the periodic table, done with the style and pomp and masterful precision that would please the likes of Kim Jong Un, if only he could afford Royal Caribbean talent. At one point, the dancers skate to the theme song of Succession . “See that!” I want to say to my fellow Suites—at “cultural” events, we have a special section reserved for us away from the commoners—“ Succession ! It’s even better than the zombie show! Open your minds!”

Finally, I visit a comedy revue in an enormous and too brightly lit version of an “intimate,” per Royal Caribbean literature, “Manhattan comedy club.” Many of the jokes are about the cruising life. “I’ve lived on ships for 20 years,” one of the middle-aged comedians says. “I can only see so many Filipino homosexuals dressed as a taco.” He pauses while the audience laughs. “I am so fired tonight,” he says. He segues into a Trump impression and then Biden falling asleep at the microphone, which gets the most laughs. “Anyone here from Fort Leonard Wood?” another comedian asks. Half the crowd seems to cheer. As I fall asleep that night, I realize another connection I have failed to make, and one that may explain some of the diversity on this vessel—many of its passengers have served in the military.

As a coddled passenger with a suite, I feel like I am starting to understand what it means to have a rank and be constantly reminded of it. There are many espresso makers , I think as I look across the expanse of my officer-grade quarters before closing my eyes, but this one is mine .

A shocking sight greets me beyond the pools of Deck 17 as I saunter over to the Coastal Kitchen for my morning intake of slightly sour Americanos. A tiny city beneath a series of perfectly pressed green mountains. Land! We have docked for a brief respite in Basseterre, the capital of St. Kitts and Nevis. I wolf down my egg scramble to be one of the first passengers off the ship. Once past the gangway, I barely refrain from kissing the ground. I rush into the sights and sounds of this scruffy island city, sampling incredible conch curry and buckets of non-Starbucks coffee. How wonderful it is to be where God intended humans to be: on land. After all, I am neither a fish nor a mall rat. This is my natural environment. Basseterre may not be Havana, but there are signs of human ingenuity and desire everywhere you look. The Black Table Grill Has been Relocated to Soho Village, Market Street, Directly Behind of, Gary’s Fruits and Flower Shop. Signed. THE PORK MAN reads a sign stuck to a wall. Now, that is how you write a sign. A real sign, not the come-ons for overpriced Rolexes that blink across the screens of the Royal Promenade.

“Hey, tie your shoestring!” a pair of laughing ladies shout to me across the street.

“Thank you!” I shout back. Shoestring! “Thank you very much.”

A man in Independence Square Park comes by and asks if I want to play with his monkey. I haven’t heard that pickup line since the Penn Station of the 1980s. But then he pulls a real monkey out of a bag. The monkey is wearing a diaper and looks insane. Wonderful , I think, just wonderful! There is so much life here. I email my editor asking if I can remain on St. Kitts and allow the Icon to sail off into the horizon without me. I have even priced a flight home at less than $300, and I have enough material from the first four days on the cruise to write the entire story. “It would be funny …” my editor replies. “Now get on the boat.”

As I slink back to the ship after my brief jailbreak, the locals stand under umbrellas to gaze at and photograph the boat that towers over their small capital city. The limousines of the prime minister and his lackeys are parked beside the gangway. St. Kitts, I’ve been told, is one of the few islands that would allow a ship of this size to dock.

“We hear about all the waterslides,” a sweet young server in one of the cafés told me. “We wish we could go on the ship, but we have to work.”

“I want to stay on your island,” I replied. “I love it here.”

But she didn’t understand how I could possibly mean that.

“WASHY, WASHY, so you don’t get stinky, stinky!” kids are singing outside the AquaDome, while their adult minders look on in disapproval, perhaps worried that Mr. Washy Washy is grooming them into a life of gayness. I heard a southern couple skip the buffet entirely out of fear of Mr. Washy Washy.

Meanwhile, I have found a new watering hole for myself, the Swim & Tonic, the biggest swim-up bar on any cruise ship in the world. Drinking next to full-size, nearly naked Americans takes away one’s own self-consciousness. The men have curvaceous mom bodies. The women are equally un-shy about their sprawling physiques.

Today I’ve befriended a bald man with many children who tells me that all of the little trinkets that Royal Caribbean has left us in our staterooms and suites are worth a fortune on eBay. “Eighty dollars for the water bottle, 60 for the lanyard,” the man says. “This is a cult.”

“Tell me about it,” I say. There is, however, a clientele for whom this cruise makes perfect sense. For a large middle-class family (he works in “supply chains”), seven days in a lower-tier cabin—which starts at $1,800 a person—allow the parents to drop off their children in Surfside, where I imagine many young Filipina crew members will take care of them, while the parents are free to get drunk at a swim-up bar and maybe even get intimate in their cabin. Cruise ships have become, for a certain kind of hardworking family, a form of subsidized child care.

There is another man I would like to befriend at the Swim & Tonic, a tall, bald fellow who is perpetually inebriated and who wears a necklace studded with little rubber duckies in sunglasses, which, I am told, is a sort of secret handshake for cruise aficionados. Tomorrow, I will spend more time with him, but first the ship docks at St. Thomas, in the U.S. Virgin Islands. Charlotte Amalie, the capital, is more charming in name than in presence, but I still all but jump off the ship to score a juicy oxtail and plantains at the well-known Petite Pump Room, overlooking the harbor. From one of the highest points in the small city, the Icon of the Seas appears bigger than the surrounding hills.

I usually tan very evenly, but something about the discombobulation of life at sea makes me forget the regular application of sunscreen. As I walk down the streets of Charlotte Amalie in my fluorescent Icon of the Seas cap, an old Rastafarian stares me down. “Redneck,” he hisses.

“No,” I want to tell him, as I bring a hand up to my red neck, “that’s not who I am at all. On my island, Mannahatta, as Whitman would have it, I am an interesting person living within an engaging artistic milieu. I do not wish to use the Caribbean as a dumping ground for the cruise-ship industry. I love the work of Derek Walcott. You don’t understand. I am not a redneck. And if I am, they did this to me.” They meaning Royal Caribbean? Its passengers? The Rands?

“They did this to me!”

Back on the Icon, some older matrons are muttering about a run-in with passengers from the Celebrity cruise ship docked next to us, the Celebrity Apex. Although Celebrity Cruises is also owned by Royal Caribbean, I am made to understand that there is a deep fratricidal beef between passengers of the two lines. “We met a woman from the Apex,” one matron says, “and she says it was a small ship and there was nothing to do. Her face was as tight as a 19-year-old’s, she had so much surgery.” With those words, and beneath a cloudy sky, humidity shrouding our weathered faces and red necks, we set sail once again, hopefully in the direction of home.

THERE ARE BARELY 48 HOURS LEFT to the cruise, and the Icon of the Seas’ passengers are salty. They know how to work the elevators. They know the Washy Washy song by heart. They understand that the chicken gyro at “Feta Mediterranean,” in the AquaDome Market, is the least problematic form of chicken on the ship.

The passengers have shed their INAUGURAL CRUISE T-shirts and are now starting to evince political opinions. There are caps pledging to make America great again and T-shirts that celebrate words sometimes attributed to Patrick Henry: “The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people; it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government.” With their preponderance of FAMILY FLAG FAITH FRIENDS FIREARMS T-shirts, the tables by the crepe station sometimes resemble the Capitol Rotunda on January 6. The Real Anthony Fauci , by Robert F. Kennedy Jr., appears to be a popular form of literature, especially among young men with very complicated versions of the American flag on their T-shirts. Other opinions blend the personal and the political. “Someone needs to kill Washy guy, right?” a well-dressed man in the elevator tells me, his gray eyes radiating nothing. “Just beat him to death. Am I right?” I overhear the male member of a young couple whisper, “There goes that freak” as I saunter by in my white spa robe, and I decide to retire it for the rest of the cruise.

I visit the Royal Bling to see up close the $100,000 golden chalice that entitles you to free drinks on Royal Caribbean forever. The pleasant Serbian saleslady explains that the chalice is actually gold-plated and covered in white zirconia instead of diamonds, as it would otherwise cost $1 million. “If you already have everything,” she explains, “this is one more thing you can get.”

I believe that anyone who works for Royal Caribbean should be entitled to immediate American citizenship. They already speak English better than most of the passengers and, per the Serbian lady’s sales pitch above, better understand what America is as well. Crew members like my Panamanian cabin attendant seem to work 24 hours a day. A waiter from New Delhi tells me that his contract is six months and three weeks long. After a cruise ends, he says, “in a few hours, we start again for the next cruise.” At the end of the half a year at sea, he is allowed a two-to-three-month stay at home with his family. As of 2019, the median income for crew members was somewhere in the vicinity of $20,000, according to a major business publication. Royal Caribbean would not share the current median salary for its crew members, but I am certain that it amounts to a fraction of the cost of a Royal Bling gold-plated, zirconia-studded chalice.

And because most of the Icon’s hyper-sanitized spaces are just a frittata away from being a Delta lounge, one forgets that there are actual sailors on this ship, charged with the herculean task of docking it in port. “Having driven 100,000-ton aircraft carriers throughout my career,” retired Admiral James G. Stavridis, the former NATO Supreme Allied Commander Europe, writes to me, “I’m not sure I would even know where to begin with trying to control a sea monster like this one nearly three times the size.” (I first met Stavridis while touring Army bases in Germany more than a decade ago.)

Today, I decide to head to the hot tub near Swim & Tonic, where some of the ship’s drunkest reprobates seem to gather (the other tubs are filled with families and couples). The talk here, like everywhere else on the ship, concerns football, a sport about which I know nothing. It is apparent that four teams have recently competed in some kind of finals for the year, and that two of them will now face off in the championship. Often when people on the Icon speak, I will try to repeat the last thing they said with a laugh or a nod of disbelief. “Yes, 20-yard line! Ha!” “Oh my God, of course, scrimmage.”

Soon we are joined in the hot tub by the late-middle-age drunk guy with the duck necklace. He is wearing a bucket hat with the legend HAWKEYES , which, I soon gather, is yet another football team. “All right, who turned me in?” Duck Necklace says as he plops into the tub beside us. “I get a call in the morning,” he says. “It’s security. Can you come down to the dining room by 10 a.m.? You need to stay away from the members of this religious family.” Apparently, the gregarious Duck Necklace had photobombed the wrong people. There are several families who present as evangelical Christians or practicing Muslims on the ship. One man, evidently, was not happy that Duck Necklace had made contact with his relatives. “It’s because of religious stuff; he was offended. I put my arm around 20 people a day.”

Everyone laughs. “They asked me three times if I needed medication,” he says of the security people who apparently interrogated him in full view of others having breakfast.

Another hot-tub denizen suggests that he should have asked for fentanyl. After a few more drinks, Duck Necklace begins to muse about what it would be like to fall off the ship. “I’m 62 and I’m ready to go,” he says. “I just don’t want a shark to eat me. I’m a huge God guy. I’m a Bible guy. There’s some Mayan theory squaring science stuff with religion. There is so much more to life on Earth.” We all nod into our Red Stripes.

“I never get off the ship when we dock,” he says. He tells us he lost $6,000 in the casino the other day. Later, I look him up, and it appears that on land, he’s a financial adviser in a crisp gray suit, probably a pillar of his North Chicago community.

THE OCEAN IS TEEMING with fascinating life, but on the surface it has little to teach us. The waves come and go. The horizon remains ever far away.

I am constantly told by my fellow passengers that “everybody here has a story.” Yes, I want to reply, but everybody everywhere has a story. You, the reader of this essay, have a story, and yet you’re not inclined to jump on a cruise ship and, like Duck Necklace, tell your story to others at great pitch and volume. Maybe what they’re saying is that everybody on this ship wants to have a bigger, more coherent, more interesting story than the one they’ve been given. Maybe that’s why there’s so much signage on the doors around me attesting to marriages spent on the sea. Maybe that’s why the Royal Caribbean newsletter slipped under my door tells me that “this isn’t a vacation day spent—it’s bragging rights earned.” Maybe that’s why I’m so lonely.

Today is a big day for Icon passengers. Today the ship docks at Royal Caribbean’s own Bahamian island, the Perfect Day at CocoCay. (This appears to be the actual name of the island.) A comedian at the nightclub opined on what his perfect day at CocoCay would look like—receiving oral sex while learning that his ex-wife had been killed in a car crash (big laughter). But the reality of the island is far less humorous than that.

One of the ethnic tristate ladies in the infinity pool told me that she loved CocoCay because it had exactly the same things that could be found on the ship itself. This proves to be correct. It is like the Icon, but with sand. The same tired burgers, the same colorful tubes conveying children and water from Point A to B. The same swim-up bar at its Hideaway ($140 for admittance, no children allowed; Royal Caribbean must be printing money off its clientele). “There was almost a fight at The Wizard of Oz ,” I overhear an elderly woman tell her companion on a chaise lounge. Apparently one of the passengers began recording Royal Caribbean’s intellectual property and “three guys came after him.”

I walk down a pathway to the center of the island, where a sign reads DO NOT ENTER: YOU HAVE REACHED THE BOUNDARY OF ADVENTURE . I hear an animal scampering in the bushes. A Royal Caribbean worker in an enormous golf cart soon chases me down and takes me back to the Hideaway, where I run into Mrs. Rand in a bikini. She becomes livid telling me about an altercation she had the other day with a woman over a towel and a deck chair. We Suites have special towel privileges; we do not have to hand over our SeaPass Card to score a towel. But the Rands are not Suites. “People are so entitled here,” Mrs. Rand says. “It’s like the airport with all its classes.” “You see,” I want to say, “this is where your husband’s love of Ayn Rand runs into the cruelties and arbitrary indignities of unbridled capitalism.” Instead we make plans to meet for a final drink in the Schooner Bar tonight (the Rands will stand me up).

Back on the ship, I try to do laps, but the pool (the largest on any cruise ship, naturally) is fully trashed with the detritus of American life: candy wrappers, a slowly dissolving tortilla chip, napkins. I take an extra-long shower in my suite, then walk around the perimeter of the ship on a kind of exercise track, past all the alluring lifeboats in their yellow-and-white livery. Maybe there is a dystopian angle to the HBO series that I will surely end up pitching, one with shades of WALL-E or Snowpiercer . In a collapsed world, a Royal Caribbean–like cruise liner sails from port to port, collecting new shipmates and supplies in exchange for the precious energy it has on board. (The actual Icon features a new technology that converts passengers’ poop into enough energy to power the waterslides . In the series, this shitty technology would be greatly expanded.) A very young woman (18? 19?), smart and lonely, who has only known life on the ship, walks along the same track as I do now, contemplating jumping off into the surf left by its wake. I picture reusing Duck Necklace’s words in the opening shot of the pilot. The girl is walking around the track, her eyes on the horizon; maybe she’s highborn—a Suite—and we hear the voice-over: “I’m 19 and I’m ready to go. I just don’t want a shark to eat me.”

Before the cruise is finished, I talk to Mr. Washy Washy, or Nielbert of the Philippines. He is a sweet, gentle man, and I thank him for the earworm of a song he has given me and for keeping us safe from the dreaded norovirus. “This is very important to me, getting people to wash their hands,” he tells me in his burger getup. He has dreams, as an artist and a performer, but they are limited in scope. One day he wants to dress up as a piece of bacon for the morning shift.

THE MAIDEN VOYAGE OF THE TITANIC (the Icon of the Seas is five times as large as that doomed vessel) at least offered its passengers an exciting ending to their cruise, but when I wake up on the eighth day, all I see are the gray ghosts that populate Miami’s condo skyline. Throughout my voyage, my writer friends wrote in to commiserate with me. Sloane Crosley, who once covered a three-day spa mini-cruise for Vogue , tells me she felt “so very alone … I found it very untethering.” Gideon Lewis-Kraus writes in an Instagram comment: “When Gary is done I think it’s time this genre was taken out back and shot.” And he is right. To badly paraphrase Adorno: After this, no more cruise stories. It is unfair to put a thinking person on a cruise ship. Writers typically have difficult childhoods, and it is cruel to remind them of the inherent loneliness that drove them to writing in the first place. It is also unseemly to write about the kind of people who go on cruises. Our country does not provide the education and upbringing that allow its citizens an interior life. For the creative class to point fingers at the large, breasty gentlemen adrift in tortilla-chip-laden pools of water is to gather a sour harvest of low-hanging fruit.

A day or two before I got off the ship, I decided to make use of my balcony, which I had avoided because I thought the view would only depress me further. What I found shocked me. My suite did not look out on Central Park after all. This entire time, I had been living in the ship’s Disneyland, Surfside, the neighborhood full of screaming toddlers consuming milkshakes and candy. And as I leaned out over my balcony, I beheld a slight vista of the sea and surf that I thought I had been missing. It had been there all along. The sea was frothy and infinite and blue-green beneath the span of a seagull’s wing. And though it had been trod hard by the world’s largest cruise ship, it remained.

This article appears in the May 2024 print edition with the headline “A Meatball at Sea.” When you buy a book using a link on this page, we receive a commission. Thank you for supporting The Atlantic.

Moscow Sky Lights Up With Strange Glow After Explosion at Electrical Substation: Reports

N ew footage has emerged showing bright flashes lighting up the night sky in southern Moscow during the early morning hours of November 22.

Knewz.com has learned that there was an explosion at an electrical substation on the outskirts of Russia's capital city followed by an alleged power outage in "several" homes.

Video snippets, shared on Russian news channels like ASTRA , captured a series of flashes that caused the sky to change color. Smoke could also be seen rising from a building.

Corroborating the video, several Russian Telegram accounts reported an explosion near the south of Moscow and a subsequent fire at the Lyublino electrical substation, southeast of central Moscow, per Newsweek .

The local authorities from the area have since confirmed that an explosion occurred in the village of Molokovo, but they reassured the public that all vital facilities were operating as normal.

Russian outlet MSK1.ru reported the blaze at the substation and noted “several” power outages.

The town of Lytkarino, located to the southeast of Moscow, was one of the affected areas, as reported by the independent outlet, Meduza .

Additional power failures were reported in the southern Domodedovo section of the city. However, electricity was later restored to these areas.

One local resident speculated that a drone may have been responsible for the explosion, but additional sources are yet to support this theory.

Newsweek reported that messages on the ASTRA Telegram account run by independent Russian journalists showed residents near the substation panicking. One concerned Russian called it a "nightmare."

The incident follows an attack by Russia on a power station in southwestern Ukraine that left 2,000 people without electricity .

Knewz.com reported previously:

“ Russian forces launched a total of 38 Iranian-made Shahed-136/131 drones during the later hours of November 17 and 18.

The Ukrainian Air Force Command reported that 29 of these drones were shot down [...].

One civilian was injured as a result of the attack that targeted energy infrastructure in the southwestern Odesa Oblast.”

The assault came after repeated warnings by Ukraine’s President Volodymyr Zelensky that Russia would try to cripple its power grid as winter approaches.

Ukraine's leader warned that if Russia resorted to attacking its power utilities, it would respond in kind.

Ukraine has conducted numerous long-range aerial drone strikes on Moscow since May 2023.

Most recently on November 20, it was reported that one such incursion was intercepted close to the city, per Kyiv Post .

Moscow’s Mayor Sergei Sobyanin confirmed this and elaborated that the region's air defense systems intercepted the unmanned craft over the city of Elektrostal to the east of Moscow, as well as another over the Bogorodsky district, northeast of central Moscow.

The details of the recently surfaced video footage have yet to be independently verified.

Sights of Elektrostal, Moscow region

Table of contents:, history of the city, park of culture and leisure, historical and art museum, october cultural center, kristall ice palace, memorial complex, museum and exhibition complex.

2024 Author : Harold Hamphrey | [email protected] . Last modified: 2023-12-17 10:06

In the Moscow region there is a small cozy town Elektrostal. Its sights for the most part have no historical value due to the fact that the city has a relatively small history. But for a visiting tourist or city dweller, they will be of interest. There is something to see, where to go to have an exciting leisure time.

Today the population of the city is 158 thousand people. Until the beginning of the 20th century there were several small workers' settlements here. After the opening of the electrometallurgical and equipment factories, the place began to be called the natural boundary of Calm. The construction of the railway made this settlement accessible, and workers and families flocked here to earn money. In 1925, the station was named Elektrostal, and the rapid increase in population allowed the village to receive the status of a city.

The founder of the city is a prominent Russian industrialist Nikolai Vtorov. It was he who opened the plant here, creating, in fact, a city-forming enterprise that is still operating. In Soviet times, it was a closed facility, and it was not easy to get to work here.

Today Elektrostal is a promising industrial city with a great future and a heroic past. It bears the proud name "City of Military and Labor Glory".

You can learn about the sights of Elektrostal with descriptions and photos here. There are places for walking, outdoor activities and cultural development.

Those who come to the city by train are met by a monument to the metallurgist. It was installed in November 2017 for the 100th anniversary of the Elektrostal plant. The attraction is made in the style of constructivism. The monument quickly won the love of the townspeople, because this city is supported by ordinary workers.

Elektrost altsy and the founding father of the plant, Nikolai Vtorov, are honored. In 2002, a monument was opened in honor of him, which became a landmark of the city of Elektrostal. The bronze sculpture is installed on the site where once stood a monument to the leader of the world proletariat, V. I. Lenin. Times change, characters change. Today, the plant, founded a century ago, is the largest in Russia. Vtorov himself, whose fortune was estimated at 60 million rubles in gold, according to Forbes magazine, was the owner of the largest capital at the beginning of the century. He was a banker, an industrialist, an entrepreneur, a man of action.

The monument was erected byinitiative of the townspeople who wished to perpetuate the monument to the great man.

One of the popular places for spending weekends and evenings among citizens and guests of the city is the Park of Culture and Leisure. Here you can ride attractions for children and adults, play slot machines, rollerblade or bike. The park is divided into two zones. Fans of unhurried walks in the fresh air make a promenade on the Quiet Alley, and those who prefer outdoor activities flock to the Entertainment Alley. The park has a summer stage, where concerts and cafes are regularly held.

Until 1999, there was no central museum among the attractions of Elektrostal in the Moscow Region. The expositions were exhibited in schools, the house of culture, in factory museums. The city was closed, so there was no large influx of tourists and visitors. The appearance of the historical and art museum made it possible for residents and guests of the city to learn a lot of useful information about their native land, the formation of the production process, and the difficult years of the war. The exposition consists of paintings by local artists, historical artifacts, household items, documents, books and much more. The collection is updated regularly. It also hosts outdoor exhibitions, which are always popular with the townspeople.

One of the main attractions of Elektrostal, the photo of which is available to almost every resident or visitor, is the Main Alley. On herpassers-by like to stroll along shady paths, townspeople rest by the fountain after a hard shift at the plant. Flower beds are the decoration of the alley. In 2006, a flower festival was held here for the first time, which has become traditional. Each enterprise of the city and private individuals give residents a real composition of fresh flowers, which pleases with bright colors all summer long. A riot of colors, aromas and a flight of fantasy reigns here. Walking through the park, you can see Snow White with a basket, a bright well, a multi-tiered cake made from fresh flowers, hearts of lovers or a fabulous house. It is almost impossible not to take a photo against the background of these compositions.

There is a cultural center in the city. It hosts performances by local creative teams and visiting stars, performances and circus performances.

In 1971, the ice palace "Crystal" was opened in the city. Almost immediately, a children's and youth hockey team was organized, which gained sports fame. This is the home sports arena for the Elektrostal hockey team. Matches of different levels are held on the ice.

There are sections for children who go in for hockey or figure skating. Citizens come here with their families to cheer for their favorite team or go ice skating.

Elektrostal is a city with a heroic past. During the war years, more than 12 thousand citizens came to the recruiting station and went to the front to defend their homeland. Almost 4 thousand of them did not return from the battle. To these heroesdedicated to the memorial complex with the inextinguishable Eternal Flame, opened in 1968

But the electricians took part in the war in Afghanistan and Chechnya. By decision of the city authorities, their memory is also immortalized in the memorial complex.

It has become a good tradition for newlyweds to lay flowers at this monument.

In 1999, a museum and exhibition complex was opened in the city, where, in addition to the exhibition hall, there are numerous circles for children, classes for young people, and a creative workshop. Various festivals, exhibitions, city holidays and other events are held within the walls and on the territory of the complex, which attract many spectators.

Listing the sights of Elektrostal, it is impossible not to mention the temples. There are several of them in the city: the church of St. John of Kronstadt, St. Andrew's Church, the hospital church of St. Panteleimon. Another new church is being built. In appearance, the temples look ancient, monumental, in the Novgorod style. But they were all built at the end of the 20th century.

Let there be no ancient artifacts among the sights of Elektrostal. But on the other hand, all of them are connected with the history of the city, with everyday work and military exploits of ordinary residents.

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40 facts about elektrostal.

Written by Lanette Mayes

Modified & Updated: 02 Mar 2024

Reviewed by Jessica Corbett

Elektrostal is a vibrant city located in the Moscow Oblast region of Russia. With a rich history, stunning architecture, and a thriving community, Elektrostal is a city that has much to offer. Whether you are a history buff, nature enthusiast, or simply curious about different cultures, Elektrostal is sure to captivate you.

This article will provide you with 40 fascinating facts about Elektrostal, giving you a better understanding of why this city is worth exploring. From its origins as an industrial hub to its modern-day charm, we will delve into the various aspects that make Elektrostal a unique and must-visit destination.

So, join us as we uncover the hidden treasures of Elektrostal and discover what makes this city a true gem in the heart of Russia.

Key Takeaways:

• Elektrostal, known as the “Motor City of Russia,” is a vibrant and growing city with a rich industrial history, offering diverse cultural experiences and a strong commitment to environmental sustainability.
• With its convenient location near Moscow, Elektrostal provides a picturesque landscape, vibrant nightlife, and a range of recreational activities, making it an ideal destination for residents and visitors alike.

Known as the “Motor City of Russia.”

Elektrostal, a city located in the Moscow Oblast region of Russia, earned the nickname “Motor City” due to its significant involvement in the automotive industry.

Home to the Elektrostal Metallurgical Plant.

Elektrostal is renowned for its metallurgical plant, which has been producing high-quality steel and alloys since its establishment in 1916.

Boasts a rich industrial heritage.

Elektrostal has a long history of industrial development, contributing to the growth and progress of the region.

Founded in 1916.

The city of Elektrostal was founded in 1916 as a result of the construction of the Elektrostal Metallurgical Plant.

Located approximately 50 kilometers east of Moscow.

Elektrostal is situated in close proximity to the Russian capital, making it easily accessible for both residents and visitors.

Known for its vibrant cultural scene.

Elektrostal is home to several cultural institutions, including museums, theaters, and art galleries that showcase the city’s rich artistic heritage.

A popular destination for nature lovers.

Surrounded by picturesque landscapes and forests, Elektrostal offers ample opportunities for outdoor activities such as hiking, camping, and birdwatching.

Hosts the annual Elektrostal City Day celebrations.

Every year, Elektrostal organizes festive events and activities to celebrate its founding, bringing together residents and visitors in a spirit of unity and joy.

Has a population of approximately 160,000 people.

Elektrostal is home to a diverse and vibrant community of around 160,000 residents, contributing to its dynamic atmosphere.

Boasts excellent education facilities.

The city is known for its well-established educational institutions, providing quality education to students of all ages.

A center for scientific research and innovation.

Elektrostal serves as an important hub for scientific research, particularly in the fields of metallurgy, materials science, and engineering.

Surrounded by picturesque lakes.

The city is blessed with numerous beautiful lakes, offering scenic views and recreational opportunities for locals and visitors alike.

Well-connected transportation system.

Elektrostal benefits from an efficient transportation network, including highways, railways, and public transportation options, ensuring convenient travel within and beyond the city.

Famous for its traditional Russian cuisine.

Food enthusiasts can indulge in authentic Russian dishes at numerous restaurants and cafes scattered throughout Elektrostal.

Home to notable architectural landmarks.

Elektrostal boasts impressive architecture, including the Church of the Transfiguration of the Lord and the Elektrostal Palace of Culture.

Offers a wide range of recreational facilities.

Residents and visitors can enjoy various recreational activities, such as sports complexes, swimming pools, and fitness centers, enhancing the overall quality of life.

Provides a high standard of healthcare.

Elektrostal is equipped with modern medical facilities, ensuring residents have access to quality healthcare services.

Home to the Elektrostal History Museum.

The Elektrostal History Museum showcases the city’s fascinating past through exhibitions and displays.

A hub for sports enthusiasts.

Elektrostal is passionate about sports, with numerous stadiums, arenas, and sports clubs offering opportunities for athletes and spectators.

Celebrates diverse cultural festivals.

Throughout the year, Elektrostal hosts a variety of cultural festivals, celebrating different ethnicities, traditions, and art forms.

Electric power played a significant role in its early development.

Elektrostal owes its name and initial growth to the establishment of electric power stations and the utilization of electricity in the industrial sector.

Boasts a thriving economy.

The city’s strong industrial base, coupled with its strategic location near Moscow, has contributed to Elektrostal’s prosperous economic status.

Houses the Elektrostal Drama Theater.

The Elektrostal Drama Theater is a cultural centerpiece, attracting theater enthusiasts from far and wide.

Popular destination for winter sports.

Elektrostal’s proximity to ski resorts and winter sport facilities makes it a favorite destination for skiing, snowboarding, and other winter activities.

Promotes environmental sustainability.

Elektrostal prioritizes environmental protection and sustainability, implementing initiatives to reduce pollution and preserve natural resources.

Home to renowned educational institutions.

Elektrostal is known for its prestigious schools and universities, offering a wide range of academic programs to students.

Committed to cultural preservation.

The city values its cultural heritage and takes active steps to preserve and promote traditional customs, crafts, and arts.

Hosts an annual International Film Festival.

The Elektrostal International Film Festival attracts filmmakers and cinema enthusiasts from around the world, showcasing a diverse range of films.

Encourages entrepreneurship and innovation.

Elektrostal supports aspiring entrepreneurs and fosters a culture of innovation, providing opportunities for startups and business development.

Offers a range of housing options.

Elektrostal provides diverse housing options, including apartments, houses, and residential complexes, catering to different lifestyles and budgets.

Home to notable sports teams.

Elektrostal is proud of its sports legacy, with several successful sports teams competing at regional and national levels.

Boasts a vibrant nightlife scene.

Residents and visitors can enjoy a lively nightlife in Elektrostal, with numerous bars, clubs, and entertainment venues.

Promotes cultural exchange and international relations.

Elektrostal actively engages in international partnerships, cultural exchanges, and diplomatic collaborations to foster global connections.

Surrounded by beautiful nature reserves.

Nearby nature reserves, such as the Barybino Forest and Luchinskoye Lake, offer opportunities for nature enthusiasts to explore and appreciate the region’s biodiversity.

Commemorates historical events.

The city pays tribute to significant historical events through memorials, monuments, and exhibitions, ensuring the preservation of collective memory.

Promotes sports and youth development.

Elektrostal invests in sports infrastructure and programs to encourage youth participation, health, and physical fitness.

Hosts annual cultural and artistic festivals.

Throughout the year, Elektrostal celebrates its cultural diversity through festivals dedicated to music, dance, art, and theater.

Provides a picturesque landscape for photography enthusiasts.

The city’s scenic beauty, architectural landmarks, and natural surroundings make it a paradise for photographers.

Connects to Moscow via a direct train line.

The convenient train connection between Elektrostal and Moscow makes commuting between the two cities effortless.

A city with a bright future.

Elektrostal continues to grow and develop, aiming to become a model city in terms of infrastructure, sustainability, and quality of life for its residents.

In conclusion, Elektrostal is a fascinating city with a rich history and a vibrant present. From its origins as a center of steel production to its modern-day status as a hub for education and industry, Elektrostal has plenty to offer both residents and visitors. With its beautiful parks, cultural attractions, and proximity to Moscow, there is no shortage of things to see and do in this dynamic city. Whether you’re interested in exploring its historical landmarks, enjoying outdoor activities, or immersing yourself in the local culture, Elektrostal has something for everyone. So, next time you find yourself in the Moscow region, don’t miss the opportunity to discover the hidden gems of Elektrostal.

Q: What is the population of Elektrostal?

A: As of the latest data, the population of Elektrostal is approximately XXXX.

Q: How far is Elektrostal from Moscow?

A: Elektrostal is located approximately XX kilometers away from Moscow.

Q: Are there any famous landmarks in Elektrostal?

A: Yes, Elektrostal is home to several notable landmarks, including XXXX and XXXX.

Q: What industries are prominent in Elektrostal?

A: Elektrostal is known for its steel production industry and is also a center for engineering and manufacturing.

Q: Are there any universities or educational institutions in Elektrostal?

A: Yes, Elektrostal is home to XXXX University and several other educational institutions.

Q: What are some popular outdoor activities in Elektrostal?

A: Elektrostal offers several outdoor activities, such as hiking, cycling, and picnicking in its beautiful parks.

Q: Is Elektrostal well-connected in terms of transportation?

A: Yes, Elektrostal has good transportation links, including trains and buses, making it easily accessible from nearby cities.

Q: Are there any annual events or festivals in Elektrostal?

A: Yes, Elektrostal hosts various events and festivals throughout the year, including XXXX and XXXX.

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