do cruise ship employees hook up with each other

Cruise Ship Crew Romance: Dating on a Cruise Ship

Romance at sea. Watching the sun set over the ocean. The band lightly playing in the background as you watch the sky turn from blue to gold and into stars and shimmering moonlight. It’s a formal night and you are both dressed up. You just came from dinner where you had escargot and lobster. You are drinking a glass of champagne. You’re about to go see a show. Cruise ship romance is oh so romantic. Do cruise ship employees hook up? Do cruise ship crew date? Can cruise ship crew and passengers date? Fall in love and get married? What is it like dating on a cruise ship? All of that and more!

*Disclosure: All views are my own and do not necessarily represent those of my employer.*

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It may sound incredible to fall in love on a cruise ship. It was portrayed on the aptly named The Love Boat (ad) , in the Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon classic Out To Sea (ad) , and on reality shows like Below Deck (ad) . None of these portrayal’s are quite the reality I experienced. (Although Below Deck might be the closest). I would like to say it’s all a bit more normal than any of that, but it’s anything but normal. Today we are going to dive into what dating is like as a crew member on a cruise ship and what cruise ship crew romance is really like. The below synopsis is based on both my personal experience, my friends experiences, and my observations over the years.

Some Truths about Cruise Ship Romances:

• Passengers and crew aren’t allowed to date. And cruise employees aren’t allowed to hook up with passengers. Sorry, Doc from The Love Boat , you would have been fired many, many times. Seriously, this is not worth getting fired over.
• The crew gossip a lot, mostly about each other.
• Some people might be married and say they aren’t. They will literally have a separate life onboard and at home.
• “Stripe chasers” is a term used for primarily women that are after officers with the most stripes (meaning higher ranking) that they can find. They do this figuring they will get to stay in a bigger cabin and later in life not have to work and get to live the life of luxury. This entire concept is a post for another day because I have a lot of opinions on the subject. Here’s a look to better understand what cruise ship officer stripes mean .
• Pick-up lines aren’t any better when said by someone with an accent. They’re still terrible.

So… Do Cruise Employees Hook Up With Passengers?

I just said it’s against the rules… but does it ever happen?

The short answer is yes. A quick search online will show you all sorts of stories of employees hooking up with passengers. The natural follow up question to this would be – well, how often? How often would be hard to quantify as it’s not commonly discussed.

But, if you are a crew member going to work onboard, don’t do it. If you get caught you will most likely get fired. There are plenty of crew to meet, so head to the crew bar and get your flirt on!

How Does a Cruise Ship Romance Start? How Do You Meet?

Meeting someone is kind of like meeting someone anywhere. You have your bubble of people that you know. And then one day you randomly meet someone in the elevator, or end up sitting with them at lunch when there weren’t any other empty seats.

Maybe you meet at a crew party or like so many great cruise ship romances – you meet in the crew bar (personally guilty as charged with this one). You make googly eyes at each other. You have reviewed the aforementioned truths. It’s decided that neither party is a passenger nor married, no one is a stripe chaser, and they haven’t used a terrible pick up line. And, the lines are quite terrible: “if you come back with me you can sleep in a proper sized bed.” (Officer cabins typically have larger beds. Side note: I saw someone try that pick up line, it didn’t work.)

Cruise Ship Crew Gossip A Lot

Cruise ship gossip can be vicious. Some ships are worse for this than others and others are pretty tame. On a gossipy ship a rumor can start from something as simple as a door shutting in a hallway at an odd time or if you were seen getting out of an elevator together. If you find yourself in the chaos of cruise ship gossip, the best you can do is ignore it. When you first start to make googly eyes with someone the easiet option is to try to play it cool to avoid being a rumor at all. Otherwise it’s like having to be “Facebook Official” after meeting for coffee once.

There are a few ways to avoid the gossip and drama all related to keeping things on the down-low. You make sure you don’t leave the bar together, instead using the “5 minute rule” (one person leaves, the other waits 5 minutes and then leaves). If you want to go ashore together you meet somewhere instead of leaving the ship together to avoid the prying eyes of the officers on the bridge and the security guards on the gangway.

If you keep your ear open you start to figure out who the people that really spread the gossip and rumors are. Over time you learn to avoid them. At some point you realize you’re not avoiding them to stay out of rumors but instead simply because they are toxic people.

Do Cruise Ship Employees Hookup? Is It the Hookup Culture that Some Shows Would Have You Think?

No…and yes? It depends on who you are and what you are looking for. But, do cruise ship employees hookup? Absolutely. Is it the hookup culture that it’s known for? If you want it to be, it certainly could be. A whole lot of people traveling to exotic locations around the world? What part of it would not lead to a hookup culture?

It can get a bit complicated and love triangles are a thing. Like very much a thing. It’s much more fun to be on the sidelines and watch it all happen but I’ve ridden in some elevators that had some uncomfortable sexual tension and romantic history. There are so many stories of cruise ship employees hooking up it’s not even funny. Let’s grab drinks sometime and I could tell you some stories (but then wouldn’t that make me no better than the gossips?)

Biggest piece of overall advice is to have some sort of idea what you’re looking for in a relationship or a love connection. Are you looking for a cruise ship romance (and maybe a forever kind of person), or are you looking for something short term? Figure out what you want and then communicate and talk about it. Also, condoms are free from the medical department. Have fun and you do you but be smart.

Cruise Ship Dating Can Be A Lot of Togetherness…

Say you’ve found that person that you actually are interested in and want to date. Once you’re ready to be “ship official” cruise ship dating is super weird. Either you are on a work schedule where you see each other literally all the time, or you’re on completely opposite work schedules and hardly ever see each other.

The cruise ship dating paradox: one week together onboard is like one month together on land, one month = one year. – life experience –

If you have work schedules that line up you are susceptible to the cruise ship dating paradox: one week = one month, one month = one year. The reason for this is that in one week you might eat lunch with them three times, dinner four, drinks six times, go see a show, and have a formal evening at a fancy steak house. In between all that then go somewhere incredible – nothing like being able to go on dates in places like Bora Bora , Honolulu, Sydney , Puerto Vallarta, Bali, etc to move the romance along.

It is easy to fit the equivalent of 16 dates into one week, more if you really wanted to. Cruise ship romance can be a lot of togetherness. This can also either make you really like each other, really hate each other, or give you a completely false idea of what a real long term relationship with that person will be like.

Or, Your Schedules Don’t Line Up At All

If you’re on very different work schedules it can be staying up late or waking up early to try to see them. It can be a lot of effort to see them at all. If they’re on the night shift and you’re on the day shift it can be even more challenging. Those times you will basically get to spend lunch together and that’s about it. Either that or you might find yourself napping constantly to try to make up for the missed sleep of trying to see each other.

Usually these cruise ship crew romances fall into three (well, sort of four) categories:

You find that all the togetherness doesn’t bother you. It’s exciting, it’s fun. You live and work in the same little floating world and everything seems fabulous. But, what happens when one of you is scheduled to go home? On a ship there are people coming and going constantly, and from countries all around the world. When someone goes home you can find yourself getting into the “big relationship questions” very early in a relationship. It’s always great to have to decide to either commit to someone long term or break up entirely within a few weeks of going out, right?

Sub-Category: Sometimes It Isn’t a Match or It’s Just a Hookup – Don’t Read Too Much Into It

Dating on a cruise ship is not so different than dating on land. Sometimes things work out and sometimes they don’t. Cruise ship romance is sometimes not romance at all. Sometimes you think you’re into someone and then when you hang out a bit and realize that even though you leave in one week you’d rather not spend your time with them. Or maybe you’re super attracted to them and…that’s it. That’s all there is to the relationship is attraction. And, much like on land, (although it is so much harder to not see them!), it’s best to let it go. It wasn’t meant to be – it’s time to move on.

Cruise Ship Relationship Category I: ‘Til Gangway Do Us Part”

You agree that the relationship won’t go any further than that contract. Once one of you leaves the ship or goes across the gangway, you are done. You keep the memories. One of you goes home. The other is still onboard… for most likely another onboard romance. C’est la vie. So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye…

Cruise Ship Relationship Category II: Long Distance

Possibly with the “promise” of seeing each other on land, but not sure you’ll do your next contract together. I’ve seen this either result in a slow fizzling out of a relationship or turn into marriage and everything in between. You find out just how much they likely by whether or not they’ll fly around the world for you. And, I would walk 500 miles…

Cruise Ship Relationship Category III: Big Life Commitments After Not Much Time Together, AKA – Line Up Your Next Contracts Together

This is the big one. If you line your next contracts up together and break up before hand you are stuck on the ship with your ex. If you don’t line them up and stay together you end up on different ships and facing a very challenging long distance situation. Such massive pressure so early in a relationship. ‘Cause I want it all, or nothing at all…

The first option is fairly self-explanatory. The second option can go a few ways. Let’s say you go with that last option. You fly to see each other and you line up your next contracts together and things start to get serious. So, what’s next? Take a look at Living Together on a Cruise Ship to find out!

Cruise Ship Romance Can Be Great

Finding love at sea can be great and certainly a ton of fun. It’s not as simple as it is made out to be in the movies and can definitely be as messy and complicated as portrayed on some shows like Below Deck.

But, would we have it any other way?

Want to know what happens when things get serious? Take a look at other posts about cruise ship romance:

Cruise ship crew romance is taken to new levels when you live together onboard . Small spaces and literally being stuck on a boat = getting to know your partner in new (and oh-so-fun) ways.

Don’t let the haters fool you, cruise ship dating can lead to happily ever after . There are tons of happy couples that met onboard. While it’s great it’s still not quite as simple as a fairytale…

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20 Surprising Behind-The-Scene Realities Of Cruise Ship Workers

Before you join a Disney ship, know there are some secrets cruise line workers can’t share, or they’ll lose their job.

If cruise ships seem like the ultimate way to vacation, then we may want to take a moment and think about the people who make it happen. Cruise ship workers live in a confined space, under strict rules, enforced by managers watching every move through CCTV cameras. Workers generally don’t get a single day off for months at a time, and they can be fired for no reason and left at the nearest port.

It’s no wonder, then, that alcohol, drugs, rampant sex, and a party-hard lifestyle is the way almost all cruise ship workers live. During the day the workers devote their attention to the passengers, kissing butt and cleaning floors and serving drinks. When their shift ends, however, is when the crew really let loose. It’s not uncommon for a cruise line worker to average three or four hours of sleep per night, and to spend the rest of the time drinking and partying in the crew quarters.

But wait, there’s more! Cruise line workers have a ton of secrets to share, they’re just not allowed to. Thankfully the internet exists and with it anonymous forums such as Reddit. Cruise ship workers spill the beans on what really goes on aboard the ship. From soap opera-level drama to serious alcoholism, to the onboard morgue for all the dead passengers, here are 20 behind-the-scenes secrets cruise ship workers can’t tell you!

20 The Passenger Cabins At The Front Are Not The Best

If you, a trusting passenger, book a room at the front of the boat, you’ll be in for a bouncy ride. You’ll feel even the smallest swells, as the room is constantly going up and down, up and down. If you start to feel a little queasy, you can take comfort in the fact that many other passengers in this room have done the same, and more. These front cabins have been covered from top to bottom in passenger vomit, many times over. The crews are constantly cleaning them, but if you were to shine a blacklight on the upholstery, you wouldn’t like what you see.

19 Crew Food Is Not Appetizing

While you’re enjoying the prime rib in one of the elegant dining halls, the crew is belowdecks, trying to swallow some yellow slop with something chewy floating in it. Crew food is gross. The kitchen staff spends all their time and resources cooking for passengers, and they whip together “stuff” for the rest of the crew as an afterthought. Sometimes the crew doesn’t get fed on time and need to wait hours until they can eat. There’s a reason that the next item on this list is so common amongst the crew…

18 The Crew Eats Passenger Leftovers

With crew food being so unpalatable, most crew members will descend upon the leftover buffet food like vultures, once it’s been cleared into the back rooms. The crew from all over the ship will casually wander into the kitchen to gorge on leftover roast beef, pizza, pasta, and whatever else they can get their hands on. Employee contracts state the ship will feed the crew three times a day, unfortunately, it doesn’t state that the food will be edible. Thankfully the passengers can’t eat all that food! The next time you’re on a cruise and you’re debating getting a third helping, just remember that you could help feed your room attendant if you don’t.

17 Crew Romances Abound

It should come as no surprise that when a few hundred young, adventurous men and women are jammed into close quarters with each other for extended periods of time, they’re going to get it on. According to multiple sources, workers on cruise ships hook up so frequently that most people end up having several relationships with different people, even if they’re in a committed relationship back on shore! Issues such as STD and unexpected pregnancy plague cruise ship crews, not to mention the never-ending drama that this lifestyle causes.

16 Cruise Ships Are Full Of Drama

With all that partying, eating, and romancing going on, soap-opera-level drama is bound to follow. The intrigues, petty politics, and gossip among cruise ship crews are epic. Friendships are made and broken, fights break out, love and sex end in betrayal and bitter tears. It would be the perfect plot for a Hollywood movie if it wasn’t so painfully real. While the staff seems so down-to-earth and professional when you’re dealing with them, underneath the surface they’re boiling with anxiety about that guy they started dating from the engineering room, who might possibly be sleeping with that spin class instructor…

15 There Are Crew Mafias

Most cruise ship employees are from the Philippines or India. They are cheaper and work with fewer complaints than Americans, although the ship will always staff some American, Canadian, or British faces for the passengers to see. This international mix of staff results in people from various backgrounds banding together. The crews call them “mafias”. The Indian Mafia, for instance, will only hang out with each other and will monopolize all the soft drinks on board, selling cans of Coke to other ethnicities at high markups. This actually happened on one cruise ship. Beware the crew mob.

14 The Crew Depends On Tips

Cruise ship workers don’t get paid much, especially those from developing countries. They work very long hours and some of them perform demeaning and hard work. Passenger tips are a huge supplement to their income, and many workers depend on them to support their families back home. If you develop a reputation as a good tipper among the staff, you can bet that your trip will suddenly get better. Guess who’s getting served first, or getting little chocolates left on their bed every morning, or getting a drink discount? That’s right, you are!

13 These Sailors Enjoy Like Sailors

Technically cruise ship workers are “sailors.” They’re waiters and cleaners and yoga instructors. But they work on a boat at sea, and they certainly live like sailors. Drinking copious amounts of alcohol is such a common occurrence among staff that it’s done almost casually. Drinks are dirt cheap at the staff bar below decks: crew pay about $1.25 for a cocktail and even less for a beer. Bottles of rum and wine are stashed in crew quarters after every shore leave, making the cruise ship the largest floating bar in the world.

12 Crew Party Hard

Wayne and Garth have nothing on cruise ship workers when it comes to partying. With all that cheap booze available and nothing to do on downtimes, crew party like there’s no tomorrow. They sleep four hours on average, sometimes less, and often go to work with a hangover. The veterans have become so proficient at doing their job in a stupor that passengers won’t even notice. Tylenol sales are big business on board a cruise ship and are usually controlled by one of the crew mafias.

11 Managers Can Be Unkind Towards The Crew

Cruise ship management is notoriously abusive. Managers are often promoted from among the crew to lord it over their colleagues. They’re given separate private quarters and the power to discipline and report crew members. Senior managers are roomed aboard every liner from head office, to oversee the operation. They watch everything on cameras, and staff can be fired at will and left at a port in some foreign country. Once in international waters, most labor laws don’t apply, and no matter how badly managers mistreat their staff, there are always hundreds of more people applying to work on the ship.

10 There’s A Morgue On Board

Most cruise liners have a morgue on board. It’s not for the managers, but for all those elderly passengers who are bound to pass away while on the cruise. The median age of cruise ship passengers is 68, and many board with oxygen tanks and wheelchairs. Death on board a cruise ship is so common that crew will often take bets on who will drop as they watch passengers board! When a death does happen, the body is stored in the onboard morgue, and kept chilled, until the ship finishes the cruise and returns to its home port.

9 There’s Also A Jail On Board

If the morgue sounds chilling, then imagine being locked up while still alive! For those who misbehave, assault others, steal, or generally act criminal, the ship has a jail on board. While at sea you are in international waters and the Captain and his designated officers are the authorities. Security can legally arrest someone and imprison them on board until they reach a port and the police can take them away. It’s not only passengers who can be jailed: often crew is thrown behind bars for incidents such as theft or assault.

8 The Law Of The High Seas Applies

When you’re out at sea in international waters, the laws of the high seas apply. These laws were established by international agreements. Basically, they state that the Captain and his/her officers are the authorities on board the vessel, and they have the power to arrest, marry, bury and divest anyone under their authority. This makes cruise line workers a little like pirates, what with all the boozing and looting.

7 Crews Know Where To Go When In Port

If you want the best deals on food and excursions when you reach a port, follow the crew. Everyone on board looks forward to the port calls because they’re allowed off the boat. They visit these ports over and over again and have learned where all the best spots are. Whether its good, cheap food or the quietest beaches or even where to go shopping, simply wait around until the crew disembarks and follow them. They’ll be itching to go have a blast on shore, and they’ll take you to the right places.

6 Sick Crew Get Quarantined

Sometimes the crew’s shore excursions cause them to catch something exotic. If a crew member falls sick, they are immediately quarantined in a special section below decks (sometimes eerily close to the morgue). During quarantine, they’re checked regularly by the ships doctor, and once they’re cleared they can go back to work. If they’re not cleared before the next port visit, they are often dropped off, fired, and left to their own devices. Most experienced ship’s crew won’t tell anyone when they’re sick as it can often end badly for them. They usually can’t tell when they’re sick anyway, with all those hangovers.

5 Port Days Are Fun Days

So long as they’re not sick, in jail, or dead, the crew can expect to have some fun every few days whenever the ship makes a port call. Just as passengers can leave and roam around on land while the ship is in port, so too can the staff. They look forward to these port visits the way children look forward to Santa visiting. It’s a release from the insanity of onboard living, as well as some much-deserved time off, away from annoying passengers and rude managers. For the cleaners and engineers who work mainly below decks, it’s also a great chance to get some vitamin D!

4 Pirate-Attack Training Is Fun

Every cruise liner trains its crews to repel pirate attacks using water cannons. Pirates are a real danger in certain parts of the world and often approach cruise ships in fast zodiacs, hoping to board, rob the passengers, and make off with as many valuables as possible. The crew train for this before passengers board. They blast water cannons at target boats, practice running around the ship and jokingly yelling “Action Stations” to each other while red-faced managers try to maintain some sense of seriousness. There is at least one attempted pirate attack on a cruise ship every year.

3 The Crew Don’t Care About The Passengers

It’s painful to realize that to the staff aboard a cruise ship, you’re just another face they’ll forget. They see thousands of people come and go, and most passengers are somewhat alike. They are paid to care for you, to be extremely helpful, and to smile a lot. Deep down they’re just waiting to go below decks to drink, or for the next port call. They generally don’t really care about you. If you go out of your way to tip them or help them out, or if you have an extra cute kid with you, you’ll stand out. Otherwise, you’re just another passenger.

2 They Live A Double Life

When a new crew member joins the ship, they are often shy and unsure of where they fit in among their new friends. By the time they leave their first cruise, they are a completely different person. They have probably had several romances, developed a questionable drinking habit, and gained a nickname that nobody back home would understand. They often go home on their month off and act normal, telling their significant other that it’s “just like any job, but on a boat.” If they’re partner or parents saw what they were really like when on board the cruise ship, they wouldn’t even recognize them.

1 Crew Sometimes Date Passengers

Having any type of relationship with a passenger is a big no-no in the industry. If caught, employees will be instantly fired and dropped off at the nearest port. This doesn’t stop people from striking up temporary romances with attractive passengers. Often times this happens when a passenger manages to make their way into the crew bar and joins the non-stop partying going on. If a passenger is cool enough, the crew might invite them along. Sometimes the lure of money is what gets passenger and crew together. In all cases, the crew needs to be extremely careful, because a permanent shore leave awaits those who get caught!

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The Beginner’s Guide to Hooking Up on a Cruise

Sunshine. Alcohol. Swimsuits…

Is there a better combination for a having a romantic encounter? Yes, actually. Add all those elements and then combine them on a cruise ship where everyone will be together for several days, all having a similar experience.

It shouldn’t be a surprise, then, that hookups can and do happen on a cruise. Call it love, call it romance, call it a one-night stand. No matter what you call it, there are people on every cruise that end up getting down after meeting on the ship.

Of course, if you’re interested in hooking up on a cruise, there are ways that you can increase your odds… and a few things that you should consider before doing so.

We’re not here to tell you not to have a good time, but you should definitely keep a few things in mind before you try to get it on.

DO be careful

Let’s get this out of the way. If you’re going to try to have some romance on a cruise ship, you need to be careful. Even though cruise ships can seem like sanitized vacations where everything is safe and clean, hooking up with strangers always carries risk. Use common sense, and listen to your gut.

Don’t go back to someone else’s cabin if you don’t feel comfortable. Protect your drink and don’t overindulge to the point that you can’t keep your wits. Wear protection if you have sex.

Sexual assault is the most common major crime reported on cruise ships, with about a hundred cases reported on U.S. cruises in 2019 . Given the millions of people that sail annually, that may not be that many, but that’s little consolation to those who are victims.

This isn’t meant to scare you. Hooking up on a cruise can be a fun and memorable experience. Just don’t let it turn into a nightmare by doing something at sea that you wouldn’t do on land.

DO attend singles’ events

Every cruise will usually have singles’ mixers during the course of the cruise. If you’re looking for a partner, the playing field doesn’t get any better than this. Put on your best outfit, have a drink or two, and go scope out the scene.

You’ll find the schedule in the ship’s daily planner. They are normally in the evening around dinner time at a specific bar. While the mixers last about an hour, the key is to take the next step of extending from the mixer to other things on the ship.

For instance, if you’re feeling that things are clicking with someone, you can ask them to dinner or to have another drink after others might have left.

DO hit up the late-night bars

Let’s face it. If you’re wanting to get lucky, then that’s usually not going to happen at 5 p.m. You’ve got to be out and about when people are thinking about romance.

The best place we can suggest is to check out the ship’s bars after midnight. Here you’ll find people that like to let loose and have a good time (but that doesn’t necessarily mean they want to hook up). But just like on land, if you’re looking for love, a late-night bar is the right place to look.

As mentioned, it’s fine to have some drinks, but don’t get sloppy. Just because a cruise ship is relatively safe doesn’t mean you should let your common sense take a rest.

DON’T be bashful

You don’t want to come across as creepy by being too aggressive, but remember that your time on the cruise ship is short. There is no time to be bashful. If you see someone that you’re attracted to, make an effort to talk to them. If you wait until you get up the nerve, then your time on the ship could already be over.

So go ahead and take that risk of striking up a conversation… or making a move to ask someone to dinner. The worst that can happen is that they say no. After the end of your cruise you won’t see them again anyway, so there is not a big risk of being embarrassed.

DON’T be too picky

If you really want to hook up on your cruise, then you’re likely going to have to forget being picky.

Remember that even the biggest cruises will have at most about 4,000-6,000 people. Once you whittle down that number to only men or women… the people that are single… and the people in your age range… the number gets to be pretty small. The “ocean” just isn’t that big on a cruise ship.

If you’re looking for companionship during the sailing, then those that have the most success will be those who cast the widest net.

DO select the right time of year to sail

The demographics of a cruise ship change dramatically throughout the year. Want to sail with a younger crowd with more singles? Check out Spring Break or summer cruises. Cruises that sail in the fall when school is back in session will have older crowds if you’re looking for a fling with a more mature person.

In general, cruise ships have all ages on board. But as a rule of thumb, shorter sailings tend to have younger crowds. So if you’re in college, then a three-day cruise would likely have more people your age that are single. Longer trips tend to see older passengers.

DON’T expect to hook up with the crew

Young, international, good looking. The crew on a cruise ship — such as personable bartenders — seem like they would be a prime hunting ground for a quick fling. Don’t do it.

Crew members are on strict orders that hooking up with passengers is forbidden. It can easily cost them their job. Keep your efforts to other passengers and not the crew.

DO remember you have to share the ship

If you are looking to hook up on a cruise, the chances are you aren’t looking for love or anything long-term. Even so, the idea of getting with someone early in the trip and then ghosting them is not great.

Remember, you are on a small, floating city. If you do something like hook up with a person on the second day and then try to avoid them the rest of the cruise, you’re going to be constantly looking over your shoulder.

Instead, avoid any awkwardness by only getting together with someone you can stand hanging out with for the remainder of your cruise.

More on Romance on a Cruise:

• Sex on a Cruise Ship: What to Know Before you Get Down
• Why You Should Never Go Nude On Your Cruise Balcony

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Tipping a couple of dollars to the bartender or the pool deck waiter is a good thing…

Hooked up in the sauna right after the ship left the dock. few words spoken and yada yada yada never saw dude again

I hooked up on cruise once and what a mistake. It was very awkward seeing him afterwards with this wife!!!! OMG!! Told me he was bi but I could tell the wife had no idea.

Sailing in February of 2024, hopefully there will be women on that cruise who wants some excitement and spice during their getaway

Some interesting information. I am going on the Temptations Cruise to the Caribbean in February, 2024 as a single male. I am wondering how one connects up with females who are going prior to the cruise. … or should I just wait and take my chances?

I am about to go on a carnival cruise in 2 days, I am wondering the Same exact thing!!! However, I will be with extended family! 🤣 I will let you know the ins and outs lol. Probably will be a fail but who knows lol. This single mom needs some excitement lol

Well hi there Miss mystery mom I am looking for the same kind of like singles cruise and I would really like to have the results of your cruise. I am so just wanted to have company on a cruise that’s all not asking that much. Please keep in touch.

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Cruise ship worker says there are six things you should never do while on one

Listen to those who spend much more time on them than you.

Tom Earnshaw

A cruise ship worker has explained exactly what you should never do when setting sail - and some of the pointers might shock you.

The summer season is almost upon us and with that, a boom in travel as millions head on their annual breaks abroad.

And for many Brits , Spain is the go to destination with recent guidance giving the 16 million UK residents heading there a sigh of relief .

But some fancy something a little different, with the likes of cruise ship excursions extremely popular if you can afford them .

With one cruise ship staff member recently explaining why you should 'get ready to spend a lot of cash' on one thing in particular , another in the industry is here with six things she says you should never do if you're getting ready to set sail on any boat.

Tammy Barr has been sailing around the world , working on cruise ships, for years on end before now doing it as a customer.

Originally shared with Business Insider, here are six things she says she would never do following her experience as a cruise ship worker and now customer.

A big no-no to the drinks package

For many, this is the big question before setting sail across the world. But for Tammy, you shouldn't pay if your drinking habits aren't on the overindulgent side of things.

"I enjoy a pina colada by the pool or a Manhattan while listening to a jazz set after dinner," she says.

"Even so, it doesn't make sense for me to pay in advance for 12 to 15 cocktails a day."

For Tammy, the math doesn't add up especially if the trip you're on will see you leaving the ship for multiple port-heavy trips. Going ashore means less time on the ship to drink its booze.

"I prefer to buy as I go and take advantage of happy hour and other drink specials that are available on certain cruise lines. I also check the beverage policy in advance and bring on my own wine, if allowed," she says.

Touching surfaces

It's time to utilise those elbows and knuckles with Tammy never using her fingers to touch stuff in the public areas such as elevator buttons.

"Some cruise lines are better than others at wiping down commonly touched surfaces, but I don't take any chances," she says.

"I avoid touching things others frequently touch, and I wash my hands frequently."

Illnesses such as norovirus can quickly spread on cruise ships, given there are thousands of people in a confined space, so taking this little measure could be the different between holiday bliss and holiday bliss.

Upgrading your food

Most cruise liners will include the main dining room meals in your package, which is one part of why the price is so much, given you're essentially paying for perks like this in advance.

But if you want something fancy, expect to pay more on top.

Tammy says that, while ' $12 may not seem like much for a steak of lobster tail', it defeats the point. She will stick to what she's got.

Calling the ship by the wrong name

A quirky one from Tammy, but one that comes down to looking the part when you're on board.

She says: "Ships have proper names, and so do not require a definite article. For example - 'Tomorrow I am embarking on Discovery Princess' or 'I enjoyed scenic cruising on MS Westerdam'."

Basically if you want to look savvy and knowledge, drop the 'the' before the ship name. It's just not correct.

Room key does not go around your neck

Tammy thinks this is a bit naff for a few reasons. For one, it can be seen as flaunting your status by showing off how often you cruise.

No one likes a show off really and the longer you are at sea, the fancier your room key.

It's also an invitation to those who have sinister means. She says: "In port, that room key bouncing off your chest looks like an invitation to be robbed. It screams 'I have money! Come and take it from me'."

There's no need for super busy port day

The idea of missing your cruise ship's departure and being stranded somewhere on the other side of the world is mortifying.

For Tammy, the best way to avoid this is to have pretty chilled port days so you're never at serious risk of missing your cruise ship before it leaves port.

"I've never missed a sail away, but I have cut it too close at times and have had to run down a pier or two. Just recently, as a passenger, my taxi driver got lost returning our group to the port at night," she says.

"When I realised how late we were going to be, I forked over $8 per minute to be connected with the ship. I pleaded with them to wait for us. It was a sprint through the port to get back on and we received quite a scolding from the first officer."

Topics:  Cruise Ship , Hacks , Holiday , Travel , World News , Money , Health , Alcohol

Tom joined LADbible in 2024, specialising in SEO and trending content. He moved to the company from Reach plc where he enjoyed spells as a content editor and senior reporter for one of the country's most-read local news brands, LancsLive. When he's not in work, Tom spends his adult life as a suffering Manchester United supporter after a childhood filled with trebles and Premier League titles. You can't have it all forever, I suppose.

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How to Hook Up on A Cruise

Alyce Meserve

31 July 2018

Who doesn’t have a secret dream about meeting their soulmate on vacation?

Let’s face it, lots of people go on vacation hoping for a little romantic action.  Some even believe the Las Vegas motto: what happens on the ship, stays on the ship .

Unless you’re on a cruise specifically themed for singles, making a love connection will take a some work on your part.

Here are a few ways to meet people on a cruise.

Double occupancy

Singles who cruise often have to bring a friend to share the room to keep the fare low. Otherwise, they pay double rates to have a cabin to themselves.

Despite the fact most people on the cruise have partners, you can also find groups that cruise with people who are single.

Next, when you meet someone, ask where they’re from, if they’re here with family or spouses.

Finally, if you enjoy talking — great! Maybe you made a new friend. If you’re just looking for some romance, thank them for talking and move on to another person who looks interesting.

Singles gatherings

Additionally, ships schedule daily solo and singles events like meet and greets. Singles meet up and share a drink or meal and get to know each other.

Not to mention it’s a great way to make new friends, you could meet your next roommate to share a cabin with on your next trip.

By the same token, if you’re lucky, you’ll find a connection with someone else.

All in all, singles events bring a bunch of eligible people together in one place at the same time.

On board events

Fortunately, there’s tons of stuff to do on board cruise ships.

All you need to do is turn up at events and just have a friendly chat with another passenger.

In other words, give them a compliment, talk about the great weather, ask where they’re from, or say where you’re from.

Likewise, you can keep it simple. Just say “hi” and introduce yourself.

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If you participate in an excursion where you are able to chat with the other guests, you may find someone who shares a similar interest or hobby, like cooking or SCUBA diving.

In addition, taking a tour gives you an opportunity to get to know the other participants over a few hours.

Then again, you may meet other people you can get together with again back on the ship, or perhaps someone from another ship.

Singles cruises

Singles cruises are also a fantastic way to meet other singles.

Fortunately, some travel agencies host  singles cruises several times each year. They arrange several daily events on board, group meals and excursions as a group to help singles meet and mingle.

In addition, some singles cruise focus on a specific age group. Consequently, it’s easier to meet someone your own age.

Solo cruisers can pay extra for a single cabin, or get matched with a roommate to get the lower double occupancy rate.

In fact, one woman found she wasn’t single for long on her singles cruise.

Crew members are off limits

Ever notice that the cabin door is always wedged open while the cabin attendant is inside? Crew members are required to keep doors open when cleaning rooms.

Indeed as cool as they are, crew can’t hang out with you.   The cruise line strictly forbids crew members fraternizing with guests.

Unfortunately, there are grave consequences. I f an employee is caught hooking up with a guest, the behavior voids their contract.

As a result, security removes them from the ship immediately and left at the next port without fare home.

Ultimately, most crew members won’t risk losing their job to hook up. (Never mind that they hook up with each other. That’s mostly overlooked.)

Stay safe while getting to know new people. Simply stay in public areas if you’re not sure of them yet.

Equally important, be careful not to give out too much personal information at first. Your new friend might be genuine, or might be scamming.

Most of all, be respectful of other people’s wishes.

Of course, if they don’t seem interested in talking, or tell you “no” or “not interested” just  move on. Even if you got a “yes” before, ask for consent before hugging, kissing, touching or engaging in sexual activity.

Unfortunately, inappropriate behavior shouldn’t have to be addressed. But it still happens a lot.  No means no, simple as that.

Above all, if someone makes you feel uncomfortable or behaves inappropriately, contact security immediately.

And condoms. Bring them. Use them.

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What Are Crew Cabins Like on Cruise Ships?

One of the most frequently asked questions I received while working on Cruise Ships was… What are the crew cabins like?

And it’s a great question because passengers know our cabin accommodations probably aren’t the best, so they’re intrigued to know exactly how bad the crew cabins can really be.

85% of cruise ship employees (mostly crew) live below the waterline and share very small and dark 9 x 9 cabins with 2 to 4 people in each one. There are bunk beds to sleep in, a small desk and chair, tv, phone, a wardrobe and mirror, a small fridge, and only one bathroom with a sink and shower, shared by all.

Some of the crew member jobs in these types of cabins include cooks, waiters, bar staff, laundry staff and more.

These cabins are also so notoriously small that only one person can be standing at a time – everyone else has to jump in their bunks, waiting their turn.

Having a small cabin with lots of people also means you’ll have to get used to waiting for the bathroom. If you all have similar job positions, you’ll need to be creative in terms of working out a schedule so everyone makes it to work on time.

Earplugs are also a must. You’d be surprised how loud someone snoring in a small cabin can be. Or, if they’re doing other things you may not appreciate – like having sex. Yep – be prepared for it!

Once, while working on cruise ships…

I shared a cabin with the Sommelier (Wine Steward). It was a tiny cabin with a small bunk bed (you can see the image above). I had the bottom bunk and he had the top – separating us vertically by no more than 3 feet. One night I was woken by the sounds of him and his casino girlfriend trying to “quietly” have sex together.

Unfortunately, the noises only got louder, and worse. After 20 minutes with no end in sight(!), I put in my earplugs and finally fell back to sleep again.

This happened every other night (as they had the courtesy to spend every other night in her room) and after about the 3rd time I didn’t even hear it anymore.

I know, strange right? It’s amazing what you get used to working on a cruise ship!

You may also want an eye mask as well, as people are coming in and out at all times of the night and the light from the corridor can be blinding. If they’re really courteous, they won’t turn on the cabin light when they come in!

Small cabins like this really suffer if one or more people are messy. Make sure you always keep your small section clean – don’t leave clothes and dirty laundry hanging around.

As the Internet Cafe Manager, one contract had me in my own cabin for most of my contract. Near the end, a brand new bar waiter was put in my cabin, which is always a little frustrating when you’re used to your own space for so long.

This was his first time at sea and first time away from home. He didn’t really understand the concept of cleaning up after himself, and I was constantly asking him not to leave his dirty clothes all over the floor.

Things finally came to a head one night after I found his dirtly underwear on my pillow. Yep. On my pillow. Last straw…

After a quick chat with the HR manager, he was thankfully moved to another cabin soon after.

And you guessed it – the lower your rank or rung on the ship’s hierarchy, the deeper into the depths of the ship you’ll be. So don’t expect a porthole or window.

In some cases, your lower position may even place you near the bow (front) or stern (back) of the ship where the worst weather is felt as the ship heaves up and down in the waves.

If you’re tendering at a port where the ship can’t dock alongside, the bow of the ship may have the gut-wrenching sound of the ship’s anchor being dropped in the early morning.

The stern has those big ship engines that continuously hum. You may love that sound, or not.

Having said all this, many of my friends in these cabins did get used to the close quarters and really loved it. They made some life-long friends and created some amazing memories.

Also, being in such close quarters and learning to constantly share and be graceful with others can definitely make you a better person, if you choose to learn from it.

The higher your rank, the better your accommodations

If you are one of the staff, you’ll most likely have a slightly larger cabin (10 x 10), but chances are you’ll only share it with one other person or have it all to yourself – making it feel much bigger.

Along with all the amenities you’ll find in the lower ranking cabins (desk, chair, tv, phone, wardrobe etc.) there may be a small couch to hang out on – perfect for having small parties or taking a nap.

There may be a slightly larger single bed due to the extra space.

You’ll also have your own bathroom, or at worst, be sharing a bathroom with the cabin next to you.

I had a cabin that shared a bathroom with the cabin next to me. When using it, the trick was always to remember to lock their bathroom door, so they don’t walk in on you.

You can imagine how many times I forgot to do that. And how many times I forgot to unlock their door after I was done. Sometimes I was not very popular with the neighbors!

And being above or on the waterline, you may even get to enjoy a porthole or window as well. But, while in port or tendering, be sure to be discreet as I’ve had passengers looking in my porthole!

Staff positions that get cabins like these include managers of departments, concessions like gift shop, casino, spa, music, entertainers and more…

I was fortunate enough to spend half my ship career in these types of cabins – sometimes on my own, but often with roommates.

And roommates can often be the best thing about a contract, especially if you get along and are respectful of each other’s space.

I had a roommate who had a hard time waking up each morning.

His phone alarm went off at 5:30am every morning – an annoying little tune that would repeat itself continously until his final alarm at 6am.

Since I didn’t have to get up until 7am, it drove me absolutely crazy. I would throw my pillows and yell at him to turn it off EVERY morning.

After no success, I resorted to turning his first alarm off when he was in the bathroom. He soon figured this out and checked each night before going to sleep.

I then turned the volume off on the alarm, which he also discovered. I even overwrote the alarm sound with a white-noise file. He figured that out too.

After 3 months, his contract ended and I was finally able to get some sleep. We remain good friends to this day, but not without always reminding him about his annoying alarm habits!

Who has the best crew cabins on a cruise ship?

By far, Officers have the best cabins. Complete with spacious larger rooms, sitting areas, office areas, large personal bathrooms, decorative art on the walls and more, the officers often have mini-suites instead of cabins. 

And the higher your rank, the better your “suite”.

The Captain obviously has the best of all these accommodations. The bed is usually a double too, if not a queen. And don’t be surprised to see a dresser or chest of drawers as well.

This isn’t too surprising though, as many of the senior officers have their family onboard from time to time and need the extra space.

You’ll also find many of the officers on the top decks at the front of the ship right near the bridge – the perfect place to be if there are any emergencies.

But it’s not all roses for the officers – being at the front of the ship means they feel the brunt of the bad weather.

And when the fog horns are going all night, guess who doesn’t get a good sleep?

My position as the IT/Communications Officer placed my cabin on deck 10 near the bridge. I was right beside the Hotel Directors cabin, who was often up late at night taking care of passenger issues.

The number of phone calls he would get after midnight, along with our paper-thin walls, made for some pretty sleepless nights.

But other than that it was a great cabin with a big window and an amazing view, and I was lucky to have it.

A Little About the Author...

Rob Lilley is passionate about working on cruise ships, and spent 5 years of his life travelling the seven seas and touching ground on all 7 continents.  With the experience of 2 different job positions in multiple contracts with different cruise lines, from explorer ships to full-sized cruise liners, Rob is keen to share his insider insights with all of those interested in working at sea! More…

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Cruise-ship workers describe the tiny cabins they live in, where up to 4 roommates can share a tight space

One of the perks of living on a cruise ship is not having to find housing or pay rent. But for some, it comes with a price: small, spare living quarters.

• That's particularly true for lower-paid workers like waiters, bar servers, and those in customer-service roles, known as crew or staff members.
• Some of the 39 current and former cruise-ship employees who spoke with Business Insider said they didn't have much room to move in their cabins.
• Managers and those responsible for steering the ship, known as officers, get their own rooms, but they aren't necessarily luxurious.
• Sign up for Business Insider's transportation newsletter, Shifting Gears, to get more stories like this in your inbox .
• Visit Business Insider's homepage for more stories .

That's particularly true for lower-paid workers like waiters, bar servers, and those in customer-service roles, known as crew or staff members. Some of the 39 current and former cruise-ship employees who spoke with Business Insider said they didn't have much room to move in their cabins. (Most of those mentioned in this story requested anonymity due to a fear of reprisal from their former employer.)

"I was sharing a cabin with another hostess, so obviously we'd have to get ready at the same time, and it was not possible," a former hostess for Costa Cruises said. "We'd have to take turns."

Costa Cruises did not respond to a request for comment.

"I couldn't open up my arms without hitting something," a former art-auction contractor who worked on a ship operated by Norwegian Cruise Line said. "It was so narrow."

Norwegian Cruise Line did not respond to a request for comment.

Related stories

Read more: Cruise-ship workers reveal what it's really like to live at sea

Crew and staff members often have one roommate, though they sometimes have three. Their rooms are furnished simply, giving occupants some combination of a bed, a desk, a closet, a few shelves, and a small bathroom. Workers may also share a bathroom with the room next to theirs or use a communal bathroom with the rest of their floor-mates.

"Seafarers on cruise ships are indispensable to the industry and the cruise travel experience," said a representative for the Cruise Lines International Association, a trade association for the cruise industry. "While space constraints are always something cruise lines have to keep in mind both from a crew and guest perspective, crew members almost always have access to other sections of the ship that are just for them, such as gyms, pools, dining areas, and lounges."

Managers and those responsible for steering the ship, known as officers, get their own rooms, though they aren't necessarily luxurious. In addition to extra space, they may have a few additional accessories, like a television or a refrigerator.

"Compared to some of the crew cabins, you had a nice cabin," said a former inventory manager for Royal Caribbean Cruises.

But when you're used to having a roommate, moving to a solo cabin can seem like a major upgrade.

"The solo cabin was actually humongous," said Chad Stone, a former production manager for Seabourn Cruise Line who moved from a shared room to an individual one after receiving a promotion. "I couldn't believe how big it was."

Have you worked on a cruise ship? Do you have a story to share? Email this reporter at [email protected] .

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This Ship Is Sinking. Can I Jump to a Client’s?

In the workplace, saving yourself is also your job.

Credit... Margeaux Walter for The New York Times

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By Roxane Gay

• April 28, 2024

Send questions about the office, money, careers and work-life balance to [email protected] . Include your name and location, or a request to remain anonymous. Letters may be edited.

Ethics of Self-Preservation

I am in a senior position with a marketing agency that is in bad shape. Employees are on reduced hours and pay because our work has slowed substantially. The owners pledged to get new work but have not made any moves in that direction. I’m looking for a new job, and I’ve seen some very appealing openings with current clients. I’d be a great candidate, because I know many of the players, and they know and like my work. We don’t have a noncompete, but I am worried I would further harm my employer if I applied for a job with its clients. Will the clients take it as a red flag? Will I accelerate the demise of my current company if I jump ship to a client? — Anonymous

You will not harm your employer by taking a new job with one of its clients. You are not responsible for your employer’s demise. If the roles were reversed, it would not offer you a fraction of the consideration you are offering. It is a job, and maybe you love it, but as I have said many times before, it will not and cannot love you back. If there are no noncompete issues (which may not matter anyway, as the Federal Trade Commission banned noncompetes last week), by all means, take a job with a client. If the client asks why you’re leaving your agency, you’re welcome to offer a diplomatic answer — or you can tell the truth. This is not an ethical quandary. It would be unethical only if, for example, you took a position with a client and then shared proprietary information about your former employer or its other clients.

The Overly Conscientious Boss

I manage a small, stellar team at a nonprofit. After annual reviews last year, I reached out to my supervisor to request raises for each member of my team and myself, factoring in both the annual cost-of-living raise and the merit raises I would like to see. I then shared what I was hoping to get each individual with that person, so they would know they had someone advocating for them. This seemed like a good decision at the time, to show I valued their hard work. However, we recently received our raise notifications, and, while everyone did get a salary bump, we didn’t quite hit the numbers I was hoping for. Now, based on some reactions, I’m worried that they’re disappointed because expectations were set too high. Did I make a mistake in giving them the specific salary increases I was hoping for? How should I follow up? Should I follow up at all? — Anonymous

Though you meant well, you did make a mistake. In the future, you can certainly tell members of your team you are going to push for raises, but don’t give them exact numbers until you know what those numbers are. In this instance, you set your team up for disappointment, and that’s what you’re seeing right now. I’m not sure if you should follow up. It may just deepen any resentment they’re feeling — a bit of salt in the wound. They probably don’t care about your good intentions right now. The best path forward is to learn from this misstep. And don’t be too hard on yourself. You were acting from a good place. I’d also think of some other ways you can show your team how much you value its hard work.

Too-Many-Ideas Guy

I work in social media on a digital media team at a nonprofit. There are two “strategists” on the digital team. Their jobs are to help strategize, and my job is to manage and create content. One of the strategists has free range deciding when and how he will participate. For example, I am responsible for managing the video content on our TikTok channel. At a meeting, this co-worker announced we would introduce a weekly stream of video content that is not a good fit and does not align with the strategy I have been developing. Further, this co-worker has never produced a video, so I am not sure what role he would play. He becomes the de facto project manager of many of his ideas, “directing” those who have the skills to do the work. My supervisor considers this co-worker a “go-getter,” but I think he is being anti-collaborative and imposing more work on the rest of us. I try to stay out of all of his projects. This, however, is still exhausting. His ideas are endless. If I did address this, how would I? — Anonymous

People like this strategist thrive in the workplace because they come up with “interesting” ideas and don’t trouble themselves with how those ideas come to fruition. Management focuses on the ideas, valuing quantity perhaps over quality, and doesn’t really care who executes the ideas so long as they are executed. Of course this is exhausting, particularly because it seems that the strategist is throwing things at the wall to see what sticks.

If you want to address this, start by sharing how much you appreciate all his enthusiasm and creative ideas, but then share that sometimes, his ideas don’t align with project aims and strategies and that it would be great if you could meet and collaborate, focusing not just on generating ideas but making sure those ideas are well aligned with organizational needs. If all else fails, become an idea person, too!

Grim Prospects

I am a 41-year-old creative/media industry professional who has struggled to find full-time work since the pandemic. I was just beginning to reach the junior rung of the management ladder when workplaces shut down and companies began downsizing. I have the additional misfortune of having spent most of my career in an industry that has been roiled by restructuring, mergers and mass layoffs. I have a master’s degree from one of the most respected professional schools in my field, a wealth of experience and enthusiasm. Yet the jobs simply don’t exist anymore for someone with my experience. I have been surviving on gig economy delivery jobs and dog walking for the past four years. I am terrified I will never get back on my real career path. Do I start over in another field? (I have an arsenal of transferable skills.) Do I go back to school? I’m single, with no children, and no property tying me to any one place. — Anonymous

A shocking number of people in the media industry are in similar straits. Just this year, there have been mass layoffs at several companies and news organizations, and too few new jobs are being created to absorb so many job seekers. You are eminently qualified, and it is incredibly painful when being eminently qualified isn’t enough.

That said, you can find a new career path. You’re going to have to think creatively. A lot of the ideas you suggested in your letter may prove fruitful.

I have more questions than answers to offer. Start with looking at other fields where you can take your arsenal of transferable skills. What do you need to do to change career paths? How can you make as lateral a transfer as possible? If you return to school, have a plan and know what you’re getting into. What do you want to study and why? What is the job market like in your field of study? Can you afford a graduate education or second undergraduate degree? If you take on student loans, will you be able to manage the debt burden?

Finally, when you do apply to new jobs, present your experience as an advantage. Highlight your creativity, resilience, leadership skills and adaptability. Good luck as you move forward.

Roxane Gay  is the author, most recently, of “Opinions: A Decade of Arguments, Criticism, and Minding Other People’s Business” and a contributing Opinion writer. Write to her at  [email protected] . More about Roxane Gay

Advice From a Work Friend

Roxane gay offers tips on office interactions, money, career and work-life balance..

Caring colleagues might mean well, but your taking on new and more projects is none of their concern . You’re simply interested in developing a more robust skill set and should communicate that.

Expressing your political views nonstop at the office can backfire. While we can and should learn from one another , our every interaction need not be so intensely didactic.

Many organizations are grappling with how to manage A.I. in the workplace. A good place to start is developing guidelines .

To get out of a dead-end job, you have to be relentless . Start by mapping out what a path to quitting looks like.

If you’re the boss and have just made a difficult decision, over-explaining  that you did what was best for everyone won’t help.

Is your colleague literally working out, or is he working from a treadmill desk? If he’s working out, something should be said . But maybe not to the boss.

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