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134 Funny Travel Quotes That Will Make You Laugh 2024

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Looking for a laugh? Check out this bumper collection of the funniest and most relatable travel quotes out there.

Designed to put a smile on your face and inspire your next travel adventure, these funny travel quotes will banish boredom and keep you entertained whilst you wait for your next trip to roll around. They are created to be shared, so make sure you send your favorite ones onto your friends!

Fun Quotes About Traveling When You’re Broke

• Stuck somewhere between “I need to save” and “you only live once”. 
• Friend: Let’s go to Bora Bora. Me: Man, I wanna go, but I’m pora pora.
• My favorite childhood memory is my parents paying for my holidays.
• When you’re trying to save money for a house, but end up with a one-way ticket to some tropical island.
• If traveling was free, BYE!

Funny Quotes about Travel

• I need a reasonably paid job. Something like $2000 an hour. Nothing too wild…
• Me: “I want to travel more”, the bank account: “Like, to the park?”
• Me before vacation: “I’m going to be responsible with my money. This is a low budget trip. I’m gonna stay in a hostel and everything.”Me on vacation: *orders fancy drinks, rides a jetski, goes skydiving, buys souvenirs for the uncle’s new girlfriend and adopts an alpaca.*
• I wish that road trips could pay my bills.

Funny Travel Instagram Captions

• At the end of the day…I’d rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, than a full bank account.
• I wish I was a postcard. For under $2 you can travel the world to any location in the world. 
• Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?
• I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance. 
• Backpacking is money spent on Education.
• Bank account nice and empty. Starting the new year on a clean slate.

Funny Captions on Travel For When You’re At Work

• How can people my age plan spontaneous trips to Thailand, I can barely afford a spontaneous soft pretzel.
• I love when people say “just quit your job and travel.” Taking an Uber from the bar to my home is the only travel I can afford. 
• Go to work. Open computer. Scroll for plane tickets for 6 hours. Close computer. Go home.
• I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords!

Funny Holiday Quotes

• Work tip: Stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return.
• Yeah, working is great…but have you tried travelling. 
• There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.
• Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito. 
• Ironing boards are surfboards that gave up their dreams and got a boring job. Don’t be an ironing board.

Funny Captions for Trip with Friends

• Life is short. Call in sick and book that last minute flight. 
• I feel like most of my work problems could be solved with a trip to…anywhere.
• I googled my symptoms. Turns out I just needed to go on a vacay.
• I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach.

Travel Quotes About Funny But True Life Priorities

• Everyone is pregnant, engaged or getting married. I just wanna lose weight and travel.
• Forget champagne and caviar – Taste the world instead
• I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine
• I just want to travel the world, overspend at IKEA and drink coffee while cuddling puppies.
• Friend 1: I’m getting a house. Friend 2: I’m having a baby. Friend 3: I’m getting married Me: I’m headed to the airport. 

Holiday Quotes Funny

• People having babies…and I’m like: What country am I going to next?
• I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just want a paycheck to buy plane tickets.
• I don’t want a house. I just want to travel and pet a lot of dogs.
• Screw the caviar, I want to travel the world!
• Reality called, so I hung up.

Funny Quotes For Vacation Obsessed Globetrotters

• I need 6 months of vacation. Twice a year.
• I’m a travel fiend on the road to recovery. Just kidding. I’m headed to the airport.
• I’ve got 99 problems. But I’m on vacation so I’m ignoring them all!
• “You can’t buy happiness” Okay, explain travel then…
• Travsessed ( n .) An obsession with travel. When all you talk or think about is your past or future trips

Vacation Quotes Funny

• It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.
• Good things come to those, who book flights. 
• I heard an airplane passing overhead. I wished I was on it.
• Tripophobia (n.) The fear of not having any travel trips currently booked.
• You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy plane tickets, which is kind of the same thing.

Funny Quotes on Travel

• Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas and take your next trip in kilometers. – George Carlin
• A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.
• “Be strong”, I whisper to my WiFi signal
• Jetlag is for amateurs

Funny Vacation Captions You Can Relate To

• My parents complain I travel too much. I mean, I could be a dr*ggie, do they realize how lucky they are?
• A plane ticket is the answer. Who cares what the question is.
• Don’t speak the language. Already said 3 times “what”. Now just smile and nod and hope for the best.
• Me travelling. Person: “Un Cafe?” Me: “Oui” Person: “Sucre” Me: “Non” Person: “You speak very good french” Me: “Gracias”
• You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.

Travel Captions Funny

• Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is into me?
• Education is important. But travel is importanter!
• If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 7-day Caribbean cruise.
• Me thinking about how many flights I can book for the cost of a new iPhone 14 Pro.
• I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m going. Are you coming with me?

Funny Quotes about Traveling

• Europeans: I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home. Australians: I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland.
• That moment when you’re asked where you got something and you answer with the name of the country, not the name of the store.
• Travelling is like a chocolate box. Don’t matter what you get. All is good.

Funny Quotes On Travel And Love

• Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.
• All you need is  love  a passport.
• I followed my heart and it led me to the airport. 
• If you had to choose between true love or travelling the world, which country would you visit first? 
• All I want for Christmas is  you  forever vacation.

Travel Funny Quotes

• Imagine falling in love with someone and then finding out they clap their hands when the plane lands.
• Some people spend their life searching for “the one”. I’m just searching for the one good travel deal.
• I’ve got a crush on the world.
• I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!

Funny Travel Memes About The Life Goals Of A Traveller

• Birds literally just eat, travel, and make a mess on things they don’t like. I don’t know about you, but that’s the lifestyle I’m striving for.
• By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always travelling & comes to family events tipsy.
• High five if you don’t know what you’re doing with your life and just want to travel the world.
• I want to live in the world where searching for plane tickets burns calories.
• Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on the beach drinking Margaritas.

Short Funny Travel Quotes

• Be afraid. And do it anyway.
• Can we just skip to the part in my life where I travel the world?
• I just need a large coffee, a plane ticket and a bag full of cash. 
• Getting out of bed would be 10x easier if there was a Caribbean ocean and 30 degree weather waiting outside for you.
• I love those days when my only decision is whether to go to the beach in the morning or in the afternoon.
• Live a life you don’t need a vacation from.

Funny Quotes about Vacation

• Work hard. Travel harder.
• I need a holiday. And by “holiday” I mean I need to move away and find a job. On the beach. With cocktails. 
• The temptation to go to the airport, buy a one-way ticket, leave the country and live on my own has never been so real.
• Ladies, imagine this. It’s 15 years from now, and you have no kids. You’re the cool wine aunt that occasionally comes back to the country for a brief visit before leaving for another long exotic vacation. You have no commitments, and a suspicious amount of money.

Funny Vacation Quotes About Packing

• Packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip. Unpacks 3 months after coming home.
• Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.
• Me: triple checked packing list Also me: *forgets underwear, contact solution, and favorite chapstick*.
• Watches Netflix happily. Remembers you need to pack. Watches Netflix stressfully.

Funny Traveling Quotes

• Me: I’m not going to overpack this time. Inner me: I need this. I will need that as well. I need everything.
• Procrastapacking (n.) the act of thinking about packing a suitcase instead of actually doing it.
• Overpack. It’s why suitcases have wheels now.

Funny Adventure Quotes

• I haven’t worn these trousers since I bought them. I should definitely pack them for my 3 day vacation. Just in case.
• So, do I live out of a suitcase for the next month? Do I unpack just to repack again? Do I put my toothbrush back in the bathroom? I’m a visitor in my own house what the heck.
• My favorite thing to pack on trips are all the clothes I never wear at home and then find fun, flirty and exciting ways to not wear them while I’m away.

Funny Captions for Travel

• Normal life: Wears the same top every day for a week. Packing for 3-day vacation: I’ll probably change a few times a day so I’ll take 21 tops.
• I have been to almost as many places as my luggage.
• Me getting ready for vacation: manicure and pedicure, buy new Sephora products, spray tan, get waxed, get hair done, work out for a month, live off kale and veggies, try on 30K swimsuits and cry in dressing rooms. Husband getting ready for vacation: packs a bathing suit, flip-flops, a T-shirt, and calls it a day.

Funny Travel Captions About Airports

• Running to the gate is my cardio.
• Airports: the only place where drinking 8 AM is socially acceptable.
• The airport is a lawless place. 7 am? Drink a beer. Tired? Sleep on the floor. Hungry? Chips now cost 17$.
• A passport holder sounds like a great idea until you get to the airport and have to remove it 4 billion times.

Funny Adventure Captions

• Worrying you’ve accidentally packed 3 kilos of dr*gs and an animal carcass as you walk through “nothing to declare” at the airport.
• I love those days when my only decision is window or aisle.
• “Be right back…” Just running away from Monday and going straight to the airport. 

Traveling Quotes That Are Funny

• If you look like your passport picture, you probably need a trip.
• Vacation calories don’t count, right?
• What’s that medical condition called where you constantly need to have a trip booked? 
• Should I book another flight to go abroad? Brain: no. Wallet: no. Mom: no. Dog: no. Universe: no…I think I’m gonna book the flight.
• You can’t make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.

Vacation Funny Quotes

• TIP: You won’t get the holiday blues if you just keep booking holidays.
• You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…
• In desperate need of a full body massage, 4 days of sleep and a ticket to the Bahamas.
• Can’t decide if I need a hug, an XL coffee, 6 ounces of vodka, or 2 months of travel.
• Travitude (n.) when you start to feel grumpy and sassy because you haven’t travelled in a while.
• My mom watches a special type of news program that only reports on horrible incidents happening in places I’m about to visit.

Funny Travel Captions for Instagram

121. “Jet lag is for amateurs.” — Dick Clark

122. “Worst thing about being a tourist, is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist!” – Russell Baker

123. “You define a good flight by negatives: you didn’t get hijacked, you didn’t crash, you didn’t throw up, you weren’t late, you weren’t nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.” – Paul Theroux

124. “I’m getting used to wearing flip flops everywhere. It’s a dangerous place to be. Next thing you know, I’m gonna show to a board meeting in sandals.”

Travel Funny Captions

125. “Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” —  Al Gore

126. “Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything.” – Steve Martin 

127. “People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D. Runes

128. “Don’t worry about the world ending today; it’s already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles M. Schulz

129. “Airline travel is hours of boredom interrupted by stark moments of terror.” – Al Boliska

130. “I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them” – Mark Twain

131. “Drink heavily with the locals whenever possible.” – Anthony Bourdain

132. “I travel light but not at the same speed.” – Jarod Kintz

133. “A hotel room all to myself is my idea of a good time.” – Chelsea Handler

134. “I crossed a time zone and I feel younger already. If I keep traveling west, I can become immortal.” – Jarod Kintz

That’s 134 Best Funny Trip Quotes

That’s a wrap on my hand picked selection of the best funny travel quote and witty puns out there. I hope they’ve entertained you and brought a smile to your face.

If so, I’d love to know which of these funny quotes about adventure were your favorites and if you know of any more I need to add to this list please comment below!

Remember, if you loved these funny travel quotes and want more inspiration and motivation check out the other travel captions and quotes I’ve compiled:

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• Best Nature Quotes
• Beach Quotes
• Hiking Quotes
• Outdoor Quotes
• Quotes about Exploration
• Waterfall Quotes
• Sunset Captions for Instagram
• Miami Quotes
• California Instagram Captions
• Arizona Quotes
• If you prefer visuals check out my Pinterest Travel Quotes board

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Funny Travel Quotes – 50 of the Funniest Travel Quotes

Here's the biggest collection of funny travel quotes all in one place. Over 50 fun travel quotes designed to put a smile on your face and inspire your next travel adventure.

50 Best Fun Travel Quotes

Do you love traveling? Do you want to make your next trip an unforgettable experience? Here's a list of 50 funny quotes about traveling that will inspire you.

As The Joker once said – Why so serious?

Travel should be fun!

Our collection of 50 funny travel quotes will inspire you to hit your next adventure with a smile. After all, who doesn't need a little Vitamin Sea in their lives?

Life is short. Call in sick and book that last minute flight.

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!

Friend: Let’s go to Bora Bora. Me: Man, I wanna go, but I’m pora pora.

I love those days when my only decision is window or aisle.

Good things come to those, who book flights.

I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance.

I need vitamin SEA.

Babies: cry all flight long. Fall asleep during landing.

I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.

Related: Summer Vacation Quotes

Funny Travel Instagram Captions

Here's a few one liners you can use to liven up your Insta feed for a good laugh!

• I wish that road trips could pay my bills
• At the end of the day.. I'd rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, than a full bank account
• Backpacking is money spent on Education.
• I always want to wear flip flops, but my boss doesn't like it…guess, I've to travel then! 
• Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on the beach drinking Margaritas.
• Taking an Uber from the bar to my home is the only travel I can afford.

Related: Funny camping captions

Funny Road Trip Quotes

Here's a short but sweet sub-section of funny road trip quotes to make you laugh:

• “A road trip is a way for the whole family to spend time together and annoy each other in interesting new places.” – Tom Lichtenheld
• “Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.” – George Carlin
• “I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” – Mark Twain

Related: Captions For Weekend Photos

Funny Travel Quotes

Here's 10 more fun travel quotes and sayings. We love this first one! How long has your longest vacation been, and isn't it about time you had another one?

I need a vacation of 6 months. Twice a year!

It’s bad manners to let a vacation wait!

If traveling was free, BYE!

Airports: the only place where drinking 8 AM is socially acceptable.

All I want for Christmas is you forever vacation.

Related: Christmas Instagram Captions

I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords!

Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.

Travelling is like a chocolate box. Don’t matter what you get. All is good.

I feel like most of my problems could be solved with a trip to … anywhere.

You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.

Funny Travel Sayings

If you've ever heard that ‘final boarding call' announcement, you'll appreciate this next travel quote!

Running to the gate is my cardio.

That moment when boarding is complete. And the seat next to you is empty.

A plane ticket is the answer. Who cares what the question is.

In desperate need of a full body massage, 4 days of sleep and a ticket to the Bahamas.

Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.

TIP: You won’t get the holiday blues if you just keep booking holidays.

I heard an airplane passing overhead. I wished I was on it.

Holiday? Now that’s a word I haven’t heard in a long time.

Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is addicted to me?

I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.

Funny Travel Captions

And there's more! Here's the next section of our collection of funny travel quotes and sayings. 

Me: I want to travel. My bank account: Like to the park?

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.

Can we just skip to the part in my life where I travel the world ?

Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?

Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito.

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need a trip.

Be afraid. And do it anyway.

I’ve got a crush on the world.

It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.

Inspiring Travel Quotes

Here's our final selection of fun quotes about travel . If you enjoyed reading them, please share on social media using the buttons at the top of the page!

People having babies. And I’m like…what country am I going to next?

If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 7-day Caribbean cruise.

You can’t make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.

I just need a large coffee, a plane ticket and a bag full of cash.

Bank account nice and empty. Starting the new year on a clean

I’ve got 99 problems. But I am on vacation and I am ignoring them all!

Yeah, working is great…but have you tried travelling.

I followed my heart and it led me to the airport.

I googled my symptoms. Turns out I just needed to go on a vacay.

Live a life you don't need a vacation from

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Travel + Beauty

218 Ridiculously Funny Travel Quotes That Travelers Can Relate To

Don’t they say laughter is the best medicine? Well, it is, besides traveling of course.  Here I have compiled a list of 218 funny travel quotes that will knock your socks off your feet. I am pretty sure if you’re an avid traveler like me you can relate to each one of these hilarious funny travel quotes if not all.

Give yourself a good chuckle with these insanely funny travel captions for your Instagram until you’re on the next jet plane.

This article may contain affiliate / compensated links. For full information, please see our  disclosure here.

Related post:

• Captions For Travel
• Friend Travel Quotes
• Traveling Alone Quotes

Funny Travel Quotes

1| “Travitude (n.) when you start to feel grumpy and sassy because you haven’t travelled in a while”- Unknown

2| “ You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.- Unknown 

3| “What’s that medical condition called where you constantly need to have a trip booked?” 

4|“Should I book another flight to go abroad? Brain: no. Wallet: no. Mom: no. Dog: no. Universe: no…I think I’m gonna book the flight.”- Unknown

5| “Birds literally just eat, travel, and shit on things they don’t like. I don’t know about you, but that’s the lifestyle I’m striving for.”- Unknown

6| “Friend 1: I’m getting a house. Friend 2: I’m having a baby. Friend 3: I’m getting married.  Me: I’m headed to the airport.”- Unknown

7|“The first condition of understanding a foreign country is to smell it.” – Rudyard Kipling

8| “Imagine falling in love with someone and then finding out they clap their hands when the plane lands.”- Unknown

9| “I feel like most of my problems could be solved with a trip to…well, anywhere.” – Anonymous

10| “When you’re trying to save money for a house, but end up with a one-way ticket to some tropical island.”- Unknown

11| “I get pretty much all the exercise I need walking down airport concourses carrying bags.” – Guy Clark

12| “Traveling’s not something you’re good at. It’s something you do. Like breathing.” – Gayle Foreman

13| “If you’re upset when traveling, just thing about a T-Rex trying to drink a martini…”- Unknown

14| “Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?” – Erma Bombeck

15| “What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?” – George Carlin

16| “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a plane ticket and that’s kind of the same thing.”-Unknown

17| “There’s nothing American tourists like more than the things they can get at home.”-Stephen Colbert

18|  “Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” — Al Gore

19| “A hotel room all to myself is my idea of a good time.” – Chelsea Handler

20| “Overpack. It’s why suitcases have wheels now.” –Unknown

21| “The cool thing about being famous is traveling. I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff.” – Britney Spears

22| “Don’t worry about the world ending today, it’s already tomorrow in Australia.”-Charles M. Schulz

23| “Adventure, yeah. I guess that’s what you call it when everybody comes back alive.” – Mercedes Lackey

24| “People complain there’re delays on flights. Delays, really? New York to California in five hours, that used to take 30 years”- Louis C.K.

25| “Traveling is like flirting with life. It’s like saying, ‘I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station. ” – Lisa St. Aubin de Teran

26| “Any time you fly somewhere, don’t pay your credit card bill. If the plane crash lands, those people will never stop looking for you.” -Kelkulus

27| “Me: I want to travel more. Bank account: like, to the park?”- Unknown

28| “Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything!” –Steve Martin

29| “I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance.” – Unknown

30|“There are only two emotions in a plane: boredom and terror.” – Orson Welles

31| “I don’t want a house. I just want to travel and pet a lot of dogs.” 

32| “No matter where you go, there you are.” – Buckaroo Banzai

33| “There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane. Either you have diarrhea, or you’re anxious to meet people who do.” – Rich Jeni

34| “The major advantage of domestic travel is that, with a few exceptions such as Miami, most domestic locations are conveniently situated right here in the United States.” –Dave Barry

35| “How is it that the first piece of luggage on the airport carousel never belongs to everyone?” – George Roberts

36| “I’m getting tired of waking up and not being on the beach .”-Unknown

37| “If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might better stay home.” – James Michener

38| “Imagine being on a plane and NOT eating every item presented to you as if you will never again have ready access to food in your life.” – Jia Tolentino

39| “When I go To Travel, I changed my password to incorrect. So whenever I forget my password, the login tells me, the password is incorrect.”-Unknown

Funny Travel Instagram Captions

40| “Catch flights not feelings.” -Unknown 

41| “I want to live in the world where searching for plane tickets burns calories.”- Unknown

42| “High five if you don’t know what you’re doing with your life and just want to travel the world.”- Unknown 

43| “You can’t make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.”- Unknown

44|  “TIP: You won’t get the holiday blues if you just keep booking holidays.”- Unknown

45| “Procrastapacking (n.) the act of thinking about packing a suitcase instead of actually doing it.”- Unknown

46| “Airports: the only place where drinking at 8 AM is socially acceptable.”- Unknown

47| “Running to the gate is my cardio.”- Unknown

48| “Work hard, travel harder.” -Unknown

49| “If you had to choose between true love or traveling the world, which country would you visit first?- Unknown

50| “A plane ticket is the answer. Who cares what the question is.”-Unknown

51| “Me traveling. Person: “Un cafe?” Me: “Oui.” Person: “Sucre.” Me: “Non.” Person: “You speak very good French.” Me: “Gracias.”-Unknown

52| “Tripophobia (n.) The fear of not having any travel trips currently booked.”- Unknown

53| “Suitcases are for princesses!”- Unknown

54| “Travessed (n.) An obsession with travel. When all you talk or think about is your past or future trips.” -Unknown

55| “People having babies…and I’m like: What country am I going to next?”-Unkown

56| “Go to work. Open computer. Scroll for plane tickets for 6 hours. Close computer. Go home.” -Unknown. 

57| “I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!”-Unknown

58| “Work tip: stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return.”- Unknown

59| “Yeah, working is great…but have you tried traveling.”- Unknown

60| “All you need is  love  a passport.”- Unknown

61| “Life goal: Create a life that people assume you have anyway based on your Instagram account!”-Unknown

62| “Reality called so I hung up.”- Unknown

63| “A change of latitude would help my attitude.”- Unknown

64| “If at some point you don’t ask yourself “What have I gotten myself into?” then you’re not doing it right. – Roland Gau

65| I have panicked unnecessarily in all four corners of the globe. – Jon Ronson

66| “I’m a travel addict on the road to recovery. Just kidding, I’m on the road to the airport.” – Anonymous

67| “ I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” – Susan Sontag

68| “Work, save, travel, repeat.” -Unknown

69| “The best way to know a city is to eat it.” – Scott Westerfeld

70| “”Traveling is like a box of chocolates. Don’t matter what you get, all is good!”-Unknown

71| “I would totally give up travel, but I’m not a quitter.” – Anonymous

72| “I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.”-Caskie Stinnett

73| “ Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is addicted to me?”- Unknown.

74| “Screw the caviar, I want to travel the world!” –Unknown

75| “Because in the end, you won’t remember the time you spent working in an office or mowing your lawn. Climb that damn mountain.”– Jack Kerouac

76| “If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I’m a size window seat in plane tickets.” – Anonymous

77| “Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.” – Unknown

Funny Vacation Quotes

78| “All I want for Christmas is you forever vacation.”- Unknown

79| “Me getting ready for vacation: manicure and pedicure, buy new Sephora products, spray tan, get waxed, get hair done, work out for a month, live off kale and veggies, try on 30K swimsuits and cry in dressing rooms. Husband getting ready for vacation: packs a bathing suit, flip-flops, a T-shirt, and calls it a day.”- Unknown 

80| “Be right back…” Just running away from Monday and going straight to the airport. “- Unknown

81| “A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.” – Robert Orben

82| “The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist.” –Russel Baker

83| “It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.” – Anonymous

84| “You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your drivers license”-Unknown

85| “I heard an airplane passing overhead. I wished I was on it.”- Unknown

86| “Isn’t it amazing how much stuff we get done the day before vacation?” – Zig Ziglar

87| “I crossed a time zone and I feel younger already. If I keep traveling west, I can become immortal.” – Jarod Kintz

88| “I need a vacation of 6 months. Twice a year!” – Unknown

89| “The devil himself had probably redesigned hell in the light of information he had gained from observing airport layouts.” – Anthony Price

90| “My goal is to hit the gym every day I’m on vacation. Usually I just end up sleeping and drinking beer.” – Gary Allan 

91| “Me before vacation: “I’m going to be responsible with my money. This is a low budget trip. I’m gonna stay in a hostel and everything.”Me on vacation: *orders fancy drinks, rides a jetski, goes skydiving, buys souvenirs for the uncle’s new girlfriend and adopts an alpaca.*”- Unknown

Funny Vacation Captions

92| “I need a vacation so long that I forget my passwords!” -Unknown

93| “Just a reminder that I’m going on vacation and you’re not.”-Unknown 

94| “I haven’t worn these trousers since I bought them. I should definitely pack them for my 3 day vacation. Just in case.” – Unknown

95| “I can’t afford vacation, so I am just going to drink until I  don’t know where I am.”- Unknown

96| “Life is a trip, plan your next vacation.” – Matthe Fryer

97| “Ladies, imagine this. It’s 15 years from now, and you have no kids. You’re the cool wine aunt that occasionally comes back to the country for a brief visit before leaving for another long exotic vacation. You have no commitments, and a suspicious amount of money.”- Unknown

98| “Live a life you don’t need a vacation from.”- Unknown 

99| “I need a holiday. And by “holiday” I mean I need to move away and find a job. On the beach . With cocktails. “ – Unknown

100| “There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.” Unknown

101| “Vacation calories don’t count, right?”- Unknown

102|“I need a vacation, not a stupid weekend.”- Unknown

103| “My favorite place to vacation is anyplace by the ocean.” – Nina Arianda

104| “Laughter is an instant vacation.” – Milton Berle

105| “ I’ve got 99 problems. But I am on vacation and I am ignoring them all! “-Unknown

Funny Quotes About Traveling With Friends

106|  “You and me, we are more than friends. We are like a small travel gang!”- Unknown

107|  “You can pack for every occasion, but a good friend will always be the best thing you could bring!” – Unknown

108| “Traveling in the company of those we love is home in motion.”– Leigh Hunt “Only the people you don’t know well enough seem normal. Every person you know well enough is odd, weird and different. This is called friendship!”- Unknown

109| “There is a whole world out there. Pack your backpack, your best friend and go.”- Unknown

110| “ I need a friend I can call in the middle of the night, tell him we have to leave, and the only sentence coming back is “when do we leave?“- Unknown 

111| “ I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” –Mark Twain

112| “Life is about doing things that don’t suck with people who don’t suck.”- Unknown

113| “The more I traveled, the more I realized fear makes strangers of people who should be friends.” – Shirley MacLaine“There are no strangers in this world, only friends I haven’t met yet.”- Unknown

114| “Let’s always vacay together.”- Unknown

115| “In life, it’s not where you go, it’s who you travel with.” -Charles Schultz

116| I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m going. Are you coming with me?”- Unknown

117|  “Sometimes all you need is a great friend and thirst for adventure.”- Unknown

118| “A good friend listens to your adventures. Your best friend makes them with you.”- Unknown

119| “Friend: Let’s go to Bora Bora. Me: Man, I wanna go, but I’m pora pora.”-Unknown

Funny Road Trip Quotes

120| “Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.” – Jerry Seinfeld

121| “I wish that road trips could pay my bills.” –Unknown

122|“If you come to a fork in the road, take it.” – Yogi Berra

123| “Life is beautiful if you are on the road somewhere.”- Orhan Pamuk

124| “Stop worrying about the potholes in the road and enjoy the journey.”- Babs Hoffman

125| “On the road again…”- Unknown

126| “A tourist is a fellow who drives thousands of miles so he can be photographed standing in front of his car.”-Emile Ganest

127| “Let’s go on a road trip.”- Unknown

128| “Road trips require a couple of things: a well-balanced diet of caffeine, salt and sugar and an excellent selection of tunes – oh, and directions.” – Jenn McKinlay

129| “It’s a road trip! It’s about adventure! . . . It’s not like we have somewhere to go.” – John Green

130| “Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.”-George Carlin

Funny Travel Quotes From Movies

131| “Adventure is out there.” – Up

132| “To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other, and to feel. That is the purpose of life.” – The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty

133| “You only get one life. It’s actually your duty to live it as fully as possible.”- Me Before You

134| “I want adventure in the great, wide somewhere.”- Into The Wild

135| “The world is not in your books and maps, it’s out there.”- The Hobbit

136| “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.” – Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

137| “We travel just to travel.” – The Motorcycle Diaries

138| “Adventure waits for no one.” – The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty

Short Funny Travel Quotes

139| “Jet lag is for amateurs.” –Unknown

140| “I just need a large coffee, a plane ticket and a bag full of cash. “- Unknown

141| ”Can we just skip to the part in my life where I travel the world?”- Unknown

142| “Don’t be a tourist, be a traveler.” – Unknown

143| “If traveling was free, BYE!”

144| “I’ve got a crush on the world.-Unknown

145| “If an ass goes traveling, he’ll not come home a horse.” – Thomas Fuller

146| “I love those days when my only decision is window or aisle.”-Unknown

147| “If traveling was free, you would never see me again.”-Unknown

148| “Buy the ticket, take the ride.”- Unknown

149| “People don’t take trips – trips take people.” – John Steinbeck

150| “The journey, not the arrival, matters.” – T.S. Eliot

151| “I love my job only when I’m on vacation.”- Unknown

152| “He who would travel happily must travel light.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupery

153| “Hey, people who travel with their bed pillow. You look insane.” – Jim Gaffigan

154| “When in doubt, travel.”- Unknown

155| “I regret traveling said nobody ever!”- Unknown

156| ”I’ve been to almost as many places as my luggage.” –Bob Hope

157| ”Education is important. But travel is importanter!”-Unknown

158| “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.” – Unknown

159| “Backpacking is money spent on education.” –Unknown

160| “Good things come to those who book flights.”-Unknown

161| “If traveling was free, you would never see me again.”-Unknown

162| “Adventure without risk is Disneyland.” – Doug Coupland

Funny Cruise Quotes

163| “Time to get ship faced.”- Unknown

164| “If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 7-day Caribbean cruise.”-Unknown 

165| “I bought my wife a ticket to go on a cruise. It’s no Titanic, but I’m optimistic.”- Unknown

166| “Bad girls don’t drink and drive…they sip and cruise.”- Unknown

167| “Seas the day and book cruise!”- Unknown

168| “On cruise mode!”- Unknown

169| “Cruise is my favorite season.”- Unknown

170| “The main point of a cruise is to eat until you weigh at the same as the boat.” – Maxine Humor

171| “Shipfaced!”- Unknown

172| “I work to support my cruising addiction.”- Unknown

173| “Work sucks, I’m going on a cruise.”- Unknown

174| “People drink on cruises so that they think the swaying is normal.” –Melanie White

175| “Warning! I bought the drink package.”- Unknown 

176| “Is it cruise o’clock yet?”- Unknown

177| “Living life one cruise at a time.”- Unknown

178| “Eat. Sleep. Boat. Repeat.”- Unknown

179| “Only on a cruise ship will you pay hundreds of dollars a day to sleep in a closet.”- Maxine Humor

180| “Let’s keep it classy on the cruise and promise we won’t dare anyone to jump off the ship.”- Unknown

181| “Honey, pack your “fat pants.” We’re going on a cruise!”- Unknown

Funny Family Vacation Quotes

182| “Help me! I’m on a family vacation.”- Unknown

183| “A family that travels together stays together.”- Unknown

184| “Family Vacation (n.) A time for you to remember why your family never spends any time together.” – Unknown

185| “Being on vacation with my family has brought me so much closer to my iPad.”- Unknown

Funny Relatable Quotes About Travel

186| “I wish I was a postcard. For under a dollar, I could travel to any location in the world.” – Anonymous 

187| “My mom watches a special type of news program that only reports on horrible incidents happening in places I’m about to visit.”- Unknown

188| “Me: I’m not going to overpack this time. Inner me: I need this. I will need that as well. I need everything.

189| “A passport holder sounds like a great idea until you get to the airport and have to remove it 4 billion times.”- Unknown

190| “By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always traveling and comes to family events tipsy.”- Unknown

191|“Packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip. Unpacks 3 months after coming home.”

192| “Some people spending their life searching for “the one.” I’m just searching for the one good travel deal.”-Unknown

193| “Me: triple checked packing list Also me: *forgets underwear, contact solution, and favorite chapstick*”- Unknown

194| “So, do I live out of a suitcase for the next month? Do I unpack just to repack again? Do I put my toothbrush back in the bathroom? I’m a visitor in my own house what the heck.”- Unknown

195| “That moment when you’re asked where you got something and you answer with the name of the country, not the name of the store.- Unknown

196| “Once a year, go somewhere you’ve never been before.” -The Dalai Lama

197| “My parents complain I travel too much. I mean, I could be a drug addict, do they realize how lucky they are?” –Unknown

198| “Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?”- Unknown

199| “At the end of the day…I’d rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, then a full bank account.”

200| “Nothing says ‘vacation’ like spending $72 on food and booze at the airport before even reaching your destination.” – Ashley Fern

201| “How can people my age plan  spontaneous trips to Thailand, I can barely afford a spontaneous soft pretzel.”-Unknown

202| “Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.” – Unknown

203| “My favorite thing to pack on trips are all the clothes I never wear at home and then find fun, flirty and exciting ways to not wear them while I’m away.” – Adam Rippon

204| “My fear of flying starts as soon as I buckle myself in and then the guy up front mumbles a few unintelligible words then before I know it I’m thrust into the back of my seat by acceleration that seems way too fast and the rest of the trip is an endless nightmare of turbulence, of near misses. And then the cabbie drops me off at the airport.” – Dennis Miller

205| “The airport is a lawless place. 7 am? Drink a beer. Tired? Sleep on the floor. Hungry? Chips now cost 17$.” – Alyssa Limperis

206| “I just want to travel the world, overspend at IKEA and drink coffee while cuddling puppies.”- Unknown

207| “My favorite memory from childhood is my parents paying for my holidays.” – Unknown

208| “People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D. Runes

209| “I love when people say “just quit your job and travel.” Taking an Uber from the bar to my home is the only travel I can afford.”- Unknown

210| “Please remain seated until we’ve reached the gate, then feel free to stand hunched over weirdly sideways for 15 minutes while we do whatever.” – ContritePerson

211| “The temptation to go to the airport, buy a one way ticket, leave the country and live on my own has never been so real.” – American Nomad

212| “You want to know what it’s like to be on a plane for 22 hours? Sit in a chair, squeeze your head as hard as you can, don’t stop, then take a paper bag and put it over your mouth and nose and breathe your own air over and over and over.” –Lewis Black

213| “You define a good flight by negatives: you didn’t get hijacked, you didn’t crash, you didn’t throw up, you weren’t late, you weren’t nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.” – Paul Theroux

214| “When you hand someone a camera, why do they act like you just asked them to disassemble a bomb? They take it and they’re like, ‘What do I do … I don’t really … ha-huh …’ Yeah, it’s the button on the top right where it always is since the beginning of #*@! time!”-Dane Cook

215| “Stuck somewhere between “I need to save” and “you only live once.” – Unknown

216| “Normal life: Wears the same top every day for a week. Packing for 3-day vacation: I’ll probably change a few times a day so I’ll take 21 tops.”- Unknown

217| “If you think adventure is dangerous try routine, it’s lethal.” -Paulo Coelho

218| “Everyone is getting pregnant, engaged or getting married. I just wanna lose weight and travel.”- Unknown

Funny Travel Quotes & Funny Travel Captions Conclusion 

I hope you enjoyed this extensive list of funny travel quotes I compiled for you. Did these funny travel quotes tickle your fancy? Let me know which funny travel captions were your favorite? If you have a hilarious quote, leave it in the comments below. No need to let it waste. I will mix it in with the other funny travel quotes with credit!

Have a love for travel quotes? Check out my other posts with travel quotes and captions to inspire you for your adventures. 

• Best Friend Travel Quotes
• Los Angeles Captions
• Beach Travel Quotes
• Sun Captions For Instagram
• Beverly Hills Captions
• Mexico Captions
• Hawaii Captions For Instagram
• Summer Captions & Quotes
• Beautiful Quotes About Greece
• Sunset Captions & Quotes
• Waterfall Quotes & Captions
• New York Instagram Captions
• Statue Of Liberty Quotes
• Dubai Instagram Captions
• Desert Instagram Captions
• Rooftop Captions
• Times Square Captions
• Florida Captions
• Amsterdam Captions
• Quotes About Palm Trees
• Santorini Instagram Captions
• Zurich Instagram Captions
• Idioms About Travel
• Copenhagen Instagram Captions
• Utah Quotes
• Abu Dhabi Instagram Captions
• Road Trip Instagram Captions
• Malibu Captions
• Hollywood Captions
• Texas Instagram Captions
• Tulum Captions
• Portugal Instagram Captions
• Bahamas Captions
• Seattle Captions
• Miami Instagram Captions
• Star Captions
• Adventure Captions For Instagram
• Argentina Captions For Instagram
• Fall Instagram Captions
• Bike Captions For Instagram
• Pumpkin Patch Captions For Instagram
• Snowflake Instagram Captions
• Bucket List Captions
• Canada Instagram Captions
• Africa Captions For Instagram
• Brazil Captions For Instagram
• Rio De Janeiro Instagram Captions

Like this post on funny travel quotes? Share it with others or pin it for later in your quotes board. 

HELP: I was unsuccessful in finding the author of some of these funny travel quotes. Please leave me a comment or send me a message if you know who the unknown authors are. I would love to give them credit.

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20 Comments

Love this quotes! They’re super unique.

Thank you Bliss, glad you enjoyed them 🙂

Haha these gave me a laugh, I especially love 98! Thanks so much for sharing!

Hello Jasmine. I am glad they gave you a good laugh!

Some fantastic quotes here! I definitely laughed aloud at some of these! My personal favourite is always “Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” I’m not sure how those machines manage to make me look SO bad in the photo, but it is definitely an accurate representation of how I look when I get off a plane!

Hi Hannah! I am so happy you enjoyed the quotes. That is a good one. They make me look bad too! lol

These quotes are so cute! And there are so many I haven’t heard before -they kept me entertained for a while! Thanks for putting a smile on my face 🙂

I am so happy I could put a smile your face Coni. I love funny travel quotes and so thrilled you enjoyed them.

These are great for a giggle!!

Thanks so much for reading Roshni! Glad they gave you a giggle 🙂

Love a good travel quote 🙂 The one about the airport being a lawless place… so true. haha thanks for sharing 🙂

So true Lora. The airport is a lawless place lol!

These are great. I love a good quote but the funny ones are the best. Awesome list!

Thank you so much Emma. So happy you enjoyed them!

Thank you for sharing. This put a smile on my face 🙂

So glad you enjoyed them!

I love love love this list, it is so great for my travel photo books!

Oh travel books are soooo much fun! I am sure you have a nice one Rebecca!

Fun collection of quotes. #31 about not wanting a house, just to travel and pet a lot of dogs – that could have been said by one of my daughters.

Hi Rhonda! I feel the exact same way as your daughter. She sounds wise! Thanks for reading!

Comments are closed.

101 Funny Travel Quotes & Captions to Brighten up Your Day (with Images)

Looking for funny travel quotes and sayings for Instagram?

Some of the best and most funny travel quotes are the ones that make you crack a smile or burst out laughing, especially when you’re not in a good mood, having a bad day, or just in need of cheering up.

On my travels I often stumble across hilarious quotes, signs and phrases that make me laugh and do a double take – often found on the walls and ceilings of cool hostels or airbnbs, as well as graffitied in streets. I especially love the really witty and clever quotes.

From all the memorable quotes I noted down from my personal travels as well as scouring the internet, and Pinterest in particular, I have compiled together a mega post of only the most hilarious travel quotes I have ever seen, for your enjoyment.

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So read on, and have a good laugh – and leave a comment below on what quote tickled you, or let me know what (if any) you found lame.

101 Funny Travel Quotes to Brighten Up Your Day

Collection of short funny travel quotes for Instagram reels, funny travel quotes from movies, and more.

1. “Don’t worry about the world ending today, it’s already tomorrow in Australia.” ~ Charles M. Schulz

2. “Don’t be a tourist, be a traveler.”

3. I need Vitamin Sea.

4. I need a vacation of 6 months. Twice a year!

5. Can we just skip to the part of my life where I travel the world?

6. “Not all who wander are lost. They’re just looking for coffee.”

7. My parents complain I travel too much. I mean, I could be a drug addict, do they realise how lucky they are?

8. I wish that road trips could pay my bills.

9. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.. Then it dawned on me..

10. “I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” ~ Mark Twain

11. Work, save, travel , repeat.

12. Don’t make me slap you with my flip flop.

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13. I have been to almost as many places as my luggage.

14. Overpack. It’s why suitcases have wheels now.

15. Life’s a beach.

16. I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!

17. Tan lines and unforgettable times.

18. I’m not lost, I’m exploring.

19. Beer. Beach. Sunset. What more could you want?!

20. Me: “I want to travel more”, the bank account: “Like, to the park?”

21. “Jet lag is for amateurs.” ~ Dick Clark

22. Sandy toes and salty kisses.

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23. It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.

24. Instead of driving a Mercedes to work, I’d rather ride on a bike to the beach.

25. Sunsets. Life’s way to saying: ‘good job, you survived another day. Here’s something pretty!’

26. “I have not travelled everywhere, but it’s on my list.”

27. There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.

28. You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license..

29. Life is better at the beach.

30. “Work hard, travel harder”

31. “You weren’t born to just pay bills and die.”

32. “A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it.” ~ John Steinbeck

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33. “I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.” ~ Henry Youngman

34. People having babies.. and I’m like: “What country am I going to next?”

35. When life knocks you down, roll over and look at the stars.

36. Fifty shades of.. red, orange, pink, and purple?

37. Drink heavily with the locals whenever possible.” ~ Anthony Bourdain

38. “There is nothing safer than flying, it’s crashing that is dangerous.” ~ Theo Cowan

39. I wish I had never gone travelling. Said no one ever.

40. All you need is love a passport

41. Lets wander where the WiFi is weak.

42. Girls just want to have.. sun?

43. Sun of a beach that’s a nice sunset!

44. “I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords

45. “I’m in love with places I’ve never been to.”

46. I’m busy.

47. “I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.” ~ Caskie Stinnett

48. Kilometres are shorter than miles. Save gas and take your next trip in kilometres.

49. A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.

50. This is me, walking down the aisle.

51. At the end of the day.. I’d rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, than a full bank account.

52. I know there is a flight leaving today that could bring me far, far away!

53. The tans will fade, but the memories will last forever.

54. I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords.

55. I have a love-hate relationship with airports. Love the excitement, hate the security.

56. I don’t need therapy, I just need a beach.

57. I’m not lost, I’m on an unplanned adventure.

58. Jet lag is my cardio.

59. I followed my heart, and it led me to the airport.

60. Me: ‘I want to travel more’, the bank account: ‘Like, to the park?

61. Me before vacation: ‘I’m going to be responsible with my money. This is a low budget trip.

62. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to trade my work emails for beach cocktails.

63. Life is short. Book the ticket, pack the flip-flops, and let’s get lost!

64. My goal is to run out of pages in my passport, not money in my bank account.

65. Jet lag is my spirit animal.

66. I’m not lost. I’m exploring alternative routes.

67. I travel because my bucket list is too long for just one lifetime.

68. Vacation calories don’t count, right?

69. I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my WiFi list.

70. I’m in a committed relationship with my passport.

71. Adventure awaits, and I’ve packed extra snacks.

72. My travel plans? Mostly just wander around and eat all the food.

73. I don’t need a hairstylist; I have a travel fan.

74. Take only memories, leave only footprints, and avoid stepping on seagulls.

75. Exploring the world, one WiFi connection at a time.

76. If travel were free, you’d never see me again… until I ran out of clean clothes.

77. I have a passport full of stamps and a heart full of wanderlust.

78. Jet lag: the souvenir that keeps on giving.

79. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it…especially when I’m traveling!

80. I’m not lost. I’m exploring unplanned destinations.

81. Traveling is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get…but it’s usually delicious!

82. I travel because my bucket list won’t fit on a to-do list.

83. Jet lag is my spirit animal…and coffee is my savior!

84. Life is short. Take the trip. Buy the shoes. Eat the dessert.

85. My sense of direction is so good that even GPS gets confused.

86. I’m in a long-distance relationship with my suitcase.

87. I travel not to escape life but for life not to escape me…and for the amazing food!

88. My favorite travel souvenir is the extra weight I gain from all the delicious local food.

89. I believe in the healing power of vitamin sea and a good cocktail.

90. I’m not a tourist; I’m an adventurer with a camera.

91. I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list…right after I finish this nap.

92. My travel philosophy: Go with the flow and the Wi-Fi.

93. I don’t need a therapist; I need a vacation…and a margarita.

94. Traveling is the only time where being lost is a good thing.

95. Adventure is out there, but so is pizza. It’s a tough choice!

96. I have a passport full of stamps and a mind full of wanderlust.

97. Current status: Not lost, just exploring alternative routes and local snacks.

98. Traveling is my therapy. The only side effect is an addiction to new experiences.

99. Traveling: The only time it’s acceptable to be constantly out of office.

100. I wander because my phone reception is terrible and I have no choice but to talk to strangers.

101. I’m in a committed relationship with my passport. Sorry, not sorry.

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Funny Travel Quotes FAQs:

Here are some commonly asked questions about funny and awesome travel quotes:

What is the best caption for travel?

Some of the best travel captions for Instagram include: “Traveling the world exposes you to beauty in all things.” “Having an ultimate destination is really optional. Sometimes all you need is to be on the way to somewhere, anywhere.” “Go, see, leave no trace.” “Journey with an open heart, and the world’s treasures are yours.” “Oh, to be at the place where the land meets the ocean.”

What are the funny couple travel captions?

Here are some funny couple travel captions for your Instagram posts: “Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” – Al Gore “Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything.” – Steve Martin “People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D “Islanded in your arms. insert palm tree emoji .” “We go together like passport stamps and jet lag.”

What is a quote about the value of traveling?

“To travel is worth any cost or sacrifice.” – Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love. This quote emphasizes that the value of traveling goes beyond monetary expenses. It highlights the transformative and enriching nature of travel, suggesting that the experiences and personal growth gained from exploring the world are invaluable.

What are some funny insta captions for travelling?

Here are a few funny Instagram captions for traveling: “I don’t always travel, but when I do, I take pictures to prove it!” “Having a great time exploring the world and pretending to be a responsible adult!” “I travel because it adds spice to my life, and by spice, I mean food!” “Jet lag is my spirit animal. We have a love-hate relationship.” Remember, humor is subjective, so choose a caption that resonates with your own sense of humor and the context of your travel experience!

How do you give catchy captions?

To create catchy captions, consider the following tips: Start with a killer first line to grab attention and engage your audience. Use humor, wordplay, or puns to add a playful and memorable element to your caption. Incorporate relevant pop culture references or trending topics to make your caption timely and relatable. Keep it concise and to the point, using impactful words and phrases. Use emojis to add visual appeal and express emotions. Ask questions or encourage interaction to prompt comments and engagement. Remember to tailor your caption to the context of your post and your target audience. Experiment with different styles and techniques to find what works best for you!

What are good short quotes?

Here are some good short quotes: “Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.” – Andy Rooney “Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart.” – William Wordsworth “The ability of writers to imagine what is not the self, to familiarize the strange and mystify the familiar, is the test of their power.” – Toni Morrison “The writer is an explorer. Every step is an advance into a new land.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson These quotes convey powerful messages and inspire creativity, growth, and self-expression.

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So there you have it – 101 of the most hilarious, cheeky and witty travel quotes to brighten up your day.

Further Reading: Itineraries

• Here’s my 5 Day Malta Itinerary
• Top 10 Things To See & Do in Malmo, Sweden
• Itinerary: How to Travel Delhi and Agra in 4 Days
• And here’s my Guide to Traveling Yucatan on a Budget

You might also like: 

• How to Find the CHEAPEST Flights in 2024
• My Local’s Guide to British Slang Words
• The Best Travel-Themed Puns for your Instagram & TikTok Reels

If you enjoyed this post,  share it on Pinterest  so your followers can enjoy it too!

Billy Read is the owner and author of BRB Gone Somewhere Epic, a travel blog that helps travelers discover unique destinations and travel experiences on a budget. With more than 10 years of global travel filled with accidents, Billy aims to help readers avoid making the same mistakes as he did, and make the most of their epic trips.

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• Work With Us

50 Funny Travel Quotes to Inspire Your Wanderlust

Traveling the world can be an adventure filled with unforgettable experiences, and sometimes, it’s the funny moments that make the journey even more memorable.

Whether you’re backpacking across Europe, cruising the Caribbean, or exploring the mysteries of Asia, a good laugh is a universal language that connects us all. So, pack your sense of humor and enjoy these humorous travel quotes that will hopefully bring a smile to your face, no matter where you are on the globe.

50 Hilarious Travel Quotes

To change it up, I included my own spin to these quotes, sharing a snippet of my own adventures and memories after each, bringing these words to life with tales from my travel diary.

“I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” – Susan Sontag

For the insatiable traveler, this quote is a witty nod to the never-ending bucket list. We’ve decided that our travel bucket list isn’t actually in a bucket anymore. It’s more like an expandable pocket dimension.

“I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” – Mark Twain

So true! Traveling together non-stop for a year is how Micki and I learned marriage could work for us. If you can survive months living in a tiny van and still enjoy their company, you can likely get along forever.

“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine, it’s lethal”-  Paulo Coelho

It’s only funny because it’s true. Statistically, train connections in the USA are safer than getting out of bed every day. When in doubt, ride a train!

Birds literally just eat, travel, and shit on things they don’t like. I don’t know about you, but that’s the lifestyle I’m striving for. – Anonymous

Who knew that birdbrained might actually be a complement to some people. Having wings would be handy at times though.

“Jet Lag is for Amateurs.” – Dick Clark

This playful quip reminds us that true globetrotters know how to handle time zone changes with a grin. While it affects us all one way or another, pushing through it means you can get on with your journey sooner. Onward and upward!

“Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” – Al Gore

A humorous observation about the less-than-glamorous side of air travel. It’s why we always laugh when people go out of their way to look good on their passport pictures. We’ve found it’s better to look so run down that no matter how badly you’re doing on your day of travel that they won’t think something is wrong with you. Same logic applies to your driver’s license.

“I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.” – Caskie Stinnett

Routine is just one of the many things nomads and wanderers try to avoid. Why have a repeat of yesterday when tomorrow can be anything?

“I’m a travel addict on the road to recovery. Just kidding, I’m headed to the airport.” – Anonymous

For those who find the allure of the airport irresistible, this quote is a humorous nod to our wanderlust. We purposely bought a house on one side of the city just to be closer to the airport. Just saying…

“Some tourists think Amsterdam is a city of sin, but in truth, it is a city of freedom. And in freedom, most people find sin.” – John Green

For me, this is a clever observation on the liberating spirit of travel and the adventures we’ll find when embracing that freedom. If the devil on your shoulder wins over the angel, that’s on you and not your destination. 😉

“There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.” – Anonymous

We’ve all felt the post-vacation blues, and this quote captures that sentiment perfectly.

“Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.” – George Carlin

A humorous take on the metric system by the legendary comedian, encouraging us to think differently about distances. One trick to happiness when traveling is to always round up or down until the number seems palatable. If you’re on a tight budget, forget I said that though.

“I follow my heart… and it usually leads me to the airport.” – Anonymous

Another witty testament to the heart’s desire for new adventures and experiences. While some people dread airports, we’ve always loved them.

“No place is ever as bad as they tell you it’s going to be.” – Chuck Thompson

Whether it’s travel, a movie, a book or a meal, always take other peoples opinions with a grain of salt. Most experiences are unique and we’ve both hated a city and loved it, with our expectations being the only difference between visits. Finding a nice place to sleep and a good restaurant goes a long way too.

“I’ve got 99 problems, but I’m on vacation and I’m ignoring them all!” – Anonymous

The perfect motto for anyone looking to temporarily escape the stresses of everyday life. Or, sell all your belongings and move your problems to another country where at least they’ll have a different accent.

Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything. – Steve Martin

A good reminder that there is no word for sorrow or regret in Timatuathian. Of course that language itself doesn’t exist so why would those two words exist anyway?

“Once the travel bug bites there is no known antidote, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life.” – Michael Palin

Ah, the joy and pain of the travel bug. It has a ferocious bite and often refuses to let go no matter how many miles you’ve put on or the amount of countries you’ve seen. The more you see, the more you realize there is to see and therein lies the problem.

Witty travel quotes, the second half

Remember, as St. Augustine once said, the world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page. So turn the page, explore, and don’t forget to laugh along the way!

“You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a plane ticket, and that’s kind of the same thing.” – Anonymous

A lighthearted reminder of how travel can bring joy into our lives. While it doesn’t take a lot of money to travel, more certainly never hurts.

“My favorite thing to do is go where I’ve never been.” – Diane Arbus

A simple yet profound statement about the essence of exploration and discovery. While it’s often the new that drives some, sometimes it can also be the old that they prefer to see in their rear view mirror.

“I would give up traveling but I’m not a quitter” – Anonymous

This quote is another playful turn on the hard work ethic and how sometimes when faced with adversity, it’s best to just bear down and keep at it, even if it’s enjoyable.

“A tourist is someone who drives thousands of miles to get a photo in front of their car.” – Anonymous

A playful jab at the classic tourist photo, this quote pokes fun at humans often absurd travel habits. Don’t worry, we have dozens of those pics as well. For instance, here we are in front of…

“The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist.” – Russell Baker

This quote humorously captures the irony of trying to blend in, only to be spotted a mile away. We have tons of pics over the years wearing certain clothing from Thai pants in Thailand to an Outback hat in Australia and all they scream at us now is tourist in bright letters.

“Traveling – it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.” – Ibn Battuta

A funny reminder that travel can render us speechless with its beauty before filling us with tales to tell.

“A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” – Lao Tzu

This ancient wisdom reminds us that sometimes the journey is more important than the destination. While I’m guessing Lao wasn’t spanning the globe, pretty sure he enjoyed his travels and was secretly prophesizing about his luggage never arriving.

“Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

While not overly humorous in it’s own right, it does remind me of a story about a friend who decided to forge his own path once on a hike and ended up needing to be cut down from a tree hours later. It was a thing but definitely adds to the adage that a good journey can be made great with a little extra humor thrown in.

Hilarious and inspiring travel quotes, the third half

Sometimes all you need to add to a travel memory is a dash of humor to make it unforgettable. Here are some more funny travel quotes to awaken your wanderlust.

“People don’t take trips, trips take people.” – John Steinbeck

While the imagery of a trip as a literal persona kidnapping a person, throwing them on a plane and making them have fun makes me laugh, this is in truth a thought-provoking quote that suggests travel has the power to transform us.

Side note: A Transformer named Trip would be just as amusing to me.

“A child on a farm sees a plane fly overhead and dreams of a faraway place. A traveler on the plane sees the farmhouse and dreams of home.” – Carl Burns

This ironic quote captures the contrasting perspectives of the traveler and the stay-at-home dreamer. While we often dream of things we miss, having the ability to miss them in the first place is reason enough to jump on a plane and go someplace for a while. Perspective often needs distance to achieve itself.

“Travel is like an endless university. You never stop learning.” – Harvey Lloyd

A reminder that travel educates us in ways that go beyond traditional learning. I recall our trip to the Galapagos Islands where we not only learned about Charles Darwin’s thoughts on evolution but also the fact to get to the ferry early so we don’t have to sit in the open back for 2 hours getting soaked from the rain…

“A road trip is a way for the whole family to spend time together and annoy each other in interesting new places.” – Tom Lichtenheld

This funny quote definitely highlights the trials and tribulations of traveling with family. While new places and activities can hold some interest, 2 snippy children will argue no matter what’s in front of them. However, now they get to do it in another country!

“ If you are going through hell, keep going.” – Winston Churchill

Winston obviously knew what it was like driving in LA but I digress, the truth is that a journey isn’t over until it’s over and even then, you might not end up where you thought you would. The unknown is half the fun.

“Live your life by a compass not a clock.” – Stephen Covey

Obviously Covey wasn’t a clock maker, but his adage remains. It’s the direction we take in life that determines our situation and that can’t always be done on a set timetable. Inflexibility in travel means inflexibility in life. Bending a little sometimes gives you a different view on where you are and where you’re heading. It’s also good for the back and knees.

“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”- Anthony Bourdain

Anthony loved travel, meeting new people and trying new foods. Sure, that 2000 calorie piece of cake shouldn’t be on your everyday menu but are you seriously not going to try it once? Live a little.

“Don’t tell me how educated you are, tell me how much you travelled.” – Mohammed

The difference between knowledge and wisdom can often be measured by the amount of footsteps we’ve taken to get there. While the scholar reads about it, the traveler experiences it, tastes it, smells it, and digests it in such a way that they’re forever changed . The willingness to put oneself out there continually and the wisdom gained from such actions can speak volumes about a person.

“From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.” – Dr. Seuss

Dr. Seuss’ characters strode the globe in their pursuits to teach and entertain and often found humor in the most unlikely places. I once found it in a sock, under a rock, in a shoe, surrounded by goo and so can you.

“It is not the destination where you end up but the mishaps and memories you create along the way.”- Penelope Riley

Another quote not so humorous in it’s wording but funny in the mishaps department. Some of our most memorable moments on the road happened due to one mishap or another. Even our worst travel day ended with us saying “at least it will be an entertaining story one day.”

“A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” – John A. Shedd

A classic example of a travel metaphor implying that we aren’t meant to stay in one place forever. We need movement to fulfill our purpose, regardless of the outcome. Though imagining all of us as little ships with legs walking around everywhere is also pretty funny to me.

“The further I go, the closer to me I get.” – Andrew McCarthy

Me is a person on the other side of the world doing something amazing at any moment. The closer to me I get, the more me I become. While I can’t always be me, I get solace in knowing that me is out there and I look forward to the day I get to be me again.

“A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it.” – John Steinbeck

As Micki and I get closer to celebrating our 20th anniversary, the truth of this statement hits me. It’s all about the journey. Preventing the boat from capsizing isn’t about control, it’s about paying attention, watching out for hidden rocks and moving and changing with the river as opposed to fighting against it. Like a journey or a marriage, a river will take you where rivers take you. Enjoy the ride.

“ That moment when you’re asked where you got something and you answer with the name of the country, not the name of the store.” – Anonymous

We’ve been guilty of this dozens of times. For a while, everything we displayed was from another country or another trip. These days we’ve packed and unpacked our things too many times to even bother showcasing them anymore but we do own some nice boxes. That one we filled in Thailand, that one in Australia, that one in South America…

“ Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.” – Anonymous

We’ve all done it though now we’ve learned from our mistakes and realize that in life we often dress to impress. The beauty of travel is most people don’t see you every day. Learn to get creative with your outfits. Maybe buy a nice hat and look out the window more often.

“Some beautiful paths can’t be discovered without getting lost.” – Erol Ozan

When you’re too busy following the path, sometimes you don’t realize you’re actually missing the journey. Explore beyond the path, there is always more to experience. More usually meaning beer, wine, food, music, art, dance and all the other good things in life worth pursuing.

“Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.”- Terry Pratchett

We travel not only to see new things but also to be able to return to things we miss. Like distance, absence also gives perspective.

“ Ironing boards are surfboards that gave up their dreams and got a boring job. Don’t be an ironing board.” – Anonymous

Don’t be an ironing board is my new mantra. For the record, I also don’t want to be an anchor (it holds people back), a yesterday (it’s never in the present) or a sock (nothing funny, I just dislike socks).

“The world is waiting for you. Good Luck. Travel Safe. Go!” – Phil Keoghan

While travel isn’t always an amazing race, sometimes it can feel that way. Slow it down, explore, enjoy! Now Go!

“ Nothing lasts forever, except the day before you start your vacation.” – Gayland Anderson

No truer words have been spoken! Anticipation of an upcoming trip is still high on my list of things I look forward to.

“ You define a good flight by negatives: you didn’t get hijacked, you didn’t crash, you didn’t throw up, you weren’t late, you weren’t nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.” – Paul Theroux

The beauty of a new thing isn’t that it’s perfect or that it will instantly replace everything that was similar that came before. It’s the start of a new branch of something that can one day become amazing and transformative. Air travel started out rough (both figuratively and literally) and has gotten to the point where it can be a joy to sit down on a flight. I am grateful for that.

“You can’t control the past, but you can control where you go next.” – Kirsten Hubbard

Again we talk about control. While our journey should be allowed to happen as it happens, that doesn’t mean that sometimes you can’t point it in another direction. As winter approaches here, south seems prudent to me right now.

“I wonder if the ocean smells different on the other side of the world.” – J.A. Redmerski

Take it from me, it does. Everything does. Expectation often colors our reality. Color away my friends, color away.

“And that’s the wonderful thing about family travel: it provides you with experiences that will remain locked forever in the scar tissue of your mind.” – Dave Barry

Haha, family travel is a great way to experience the exact same trip from multiple points of view. A parent and a toddler can have the exact same day yet have very different takes on a situation. Same can be said for travel. Want to see the world differently? Explore it via your children and you’ll have a whole new understanding of the world. Hopefully it’s a positive experience for everyone but if not, at least there’s probably a good story in there somewhere.

May your travels be filled with laughter and joy. Remember, every journey is an opportunity for new stories and a good chuckle. Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer, especially when it comes with a side of laughter!

80+ Short Funny Travel Quotes to Make You Smile & Laugh

By: Author Charles

Posted on April 20, 2023

Some of the best funny travel quotes are the ones that brighten your day and fill you with laughter. When traveling to destinations all over the world, there are often funny sayings and quotes to put a smile on your face.

Whether in the airport, on the beach, in the city streets, or other random places, you are sure to come across situations where a funny travel quote can be used. Not all days of travel are easy, sometimes a good short funny travel quote is all you need to cheer you up and get you ready for the next adventure.

Adventures can make for the funniest stories and most memorable moments. While out on the road, nothing is better than some laughter and happiness. Read on, have a good laugh, and get ready for some of the best short funny travel quotes that will knock your socks off.

→ If you enjoy reading through these short funny travel quotes, read through the best short travel quotes about a variety of topics

The Best Short Funny Travel Quotes 

Looking for a good laugh while abroad? Or maybe you just need a little encouragement while out on the open road? Laughter is always the best medicine. Here are the absolute best short funny travel quotes.

“I have 99 problems and traveling is not one of them.”

“I have panicked unnecessarily in all four corners of the globe.” – Jon Ronson

“Adventure without risk is Disneyland.” – Doug Coupland

“I forgot I would have to climb back down.”

“If you had to choose between true love or traveling the world, which country would you visit first?”

“I don’t know the question, but travel is definitely the answer.”

“Statuettes of drunken sailors, velvet pictures of island maidens, plastic seashell lamps made in Taiwan. What contempt the people who think up souvenirs have for other people.” – Diane Johnson

Flying & Airports Funny Travel Quotes

It’s almost impossible to travel abroad without hitting at least one airport to get to your destination. Flying allows you to venture to distant and faraway places and is often the first step of your next big journey.

Airports are the gateway between you and a totally new world, making them some of the most diverse and comical places. Here are some of the best short funny travel quotes related to flying and airports. 

“The airport is a lawless place. 7am? Drink a beer. Tired? Sleep on the floor. Hungry? Chips now cost $17.”

“Running to the gate is my cardio.”

“I just need a large coffee, a plane ticket, and a bag full of cash.”

“Sometimes, you just need a change of altitude.”

“Up in the clouds is my favorite place to be.”

 “Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.”

“Such a small window, such a big world.”

“I’ve got my head in the clouds…literally.”

“I’m a travel addict on the road to recovery. Just kidding! I’m on my way to the airport.”

“Jetlag is for amateurs.” – Dick Clark

“I may not be able to buy happiness, but I can buy plane tickets and that’s pretty much the same thing.”

“I only collect one thing: stamps on my passport.”

Funny Travel Food & Drink Quotes

Food is a worldwide language. Many travelers go to far-off destinations, just to taste their unique and delicious cuisine.

A night on the town or an early brunch with friends are often the funniest moments of a trip. You never know what can happen! Here are some of the best short funny travel quotes relating to food and drink. 

“Vacation calories don’t count.”

“Can’t decide if I need a hug, XL coffee, 6 shots of vodka, or 2 months of traveling.”

“I am not a great book, I am not a great artist, but I love art and I love food; so I am the perfect traveler.” – Michael Palin

“You can handle just about anything that comes at you out on the road with a believable grin, common sense, and whiskey.” – Bill Murray

“Will travel for food.”

“The only thing I love more than traveling is eating. So, why not do both at the same time?”

Funny Travel Quotes for Vacation

Vacation is the time to let loose, relax, and spend your time smiling and having a good time. A little laughter goes a long way on vacation, as it spreads and expands to knee-slapping comedy.

Whether you are traveling with your best friends, as a family, or with the one you love, vacations are a time to laugh with the ones you love most. Here are some of the best short funny vacation travel quotes. 

“I googled my symptoms. Turns out I just need a vacation.”

“It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.”

“Calories don’t count when you’re on vacation.”

“Nothing last forever, except the day before a vacation.”

“No point in unpacking…I’m ready to hit the road again soon.”

“When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money.” – Susan Heller

“When there is no wifi; you might be about to have a great adventure.”

» Read More: The best short travel quotes with friends

Sarcastic Short Funny Travel Quotes 

Everyone has a little sarcasm in them, some just show it better than others. Remember when you travel, not everyone will understand your way of life.

Sometimes looking at things from a new perspective, or making a sarcastic comment just to lighten the mood can make a journey even more memorable than before. Here are the best sarcastic short funny travel quotes. 

“Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is addicted to me?”

“What’s the medical condition called when you constantly need to have a trip booked?”

“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine. It’s lethal.”

“My favorite memory from my childhood is my parents paying for my holidays.”

“Adventure, yeah, I guess that’s what you call it when everybody comes back alive.” – Mercedes Lackey

“Thanks to the interstate highway system, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything.” – Charles Kuralt

“I work so hard so my passport will have a good time.”

Short Funny Punny Travel Quotes 

Who doesn’t love a good pun? Travel lovers and adventures of all kinds are always ready for a good laugh, especially when it comes to geography. For making friends abroad, sometimes all you need is a good ice-breaker or a ‘punny’ joke to bring a smile to their face. Here are some of the best funny travel quote puns.

“You told me it was Chile in South America. I don’t Bolivia you.”

“What’s so great about Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.”

“This goulash soup will make you Hungary.”

“I’m Tallin you, this place is awesome.”

“I want to go to Bora Bora, but I’m poora poora.”

“Eiffel in love with Paris.”

“How Kenya leave this place?”

“Needed to visit Tehran before Iran out of time.”

“A good glass of wine is never Faro way in Portugal.”

“I was gonna share a time travel joke, but you guys didn’t like it.”

“Greetings from [insert location]. I live here now.”

Short Funny Outdoor Travel Quotes 

Traveling in nature can be a magical experience. Whether you are hiking through the forest, snorkeling in the reefs, or camping on top of the highest mountain. Traveling in nature can be some of the most memorable times, and can lead to some funny stories as well.

Here are some of the best short funny quotes about nature and the great outdoors. 

“There’s no time to be bored in a world as beautiful as this.” – John Ruskin

“Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on the beach drinking margaritas.”

“Life should have more mountains and less stress.”

“I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach.”

“Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should go to the beach.”

“Watch more sunsets than Netflix.”

“Do you think the beach misses me as much as I miss it?”

“I like being at the top of the mountain. One can’t get lost here.” – Wislawa Szymborska

» Read More: The best short couple travel quotes

Funny Quotes About Quitting Work to Travel 

Do you ever think about quitting your job and buying a one-way ticket to paradise? Rest assured, you aren’t the only one. It’s actually becoming quite common to ditch your 9-5 and travel the world as remote opportunities have paved the way for digital nomads.

To inspire you to follow your dreams, here are some of the best short funny quotes about quitting your job to travel. 

“Yeah, working is great. But have you tried traveling?”

“There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.”

“Work tip: stand up, stretch, take a walk, go to the airport, get on a plane, never return.”

“Take me as I am, or watch me as I go.”

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.” – Outon Brown 

“I travel so my life is not disrupted by routine.”

“All I need is a 3-month vacation, 4 times a year. That’s really not asking for much.”

“It’s a road trip! It’s about adventure!.. It’s not like we have somewhere to go.”

Classic Short Funny Travel Quotes 

You can never go wrong with a great classic. Some of the most cherished quotes are known to make you crack a smile or at least a little chuckle.

When you travel, not all days are easy, some are really hard. For motivation, inspiration, and encouragement when things get rough, here are some of the best short funny travel quotes.

“You’re off to great places, today is your day, your mountain is waiting, so get on your way!” – Dr. Suess

“The traveler sees what he sees. The tourist sees what he has come to see.” – G.K Chesterton

“When life knocks you down, roll over and look at the stars.”

“You cannot control the past, but you can control where you go next!”

“A camera teaches you how to see without a camera.”

“I’ve got a bad case of wanderlust.”

More Funny Travel Quotes 

Can’t get enough and looking for even more funny travel quotes? No worries! Here are a few more quotes to finish off this list of the funniest quotes about traveling and seeing the world. 

“Stop worrying about the potholes in the road and enjoy the journey.” – Barbara Hoffman

“Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere.” – Mae West

“Bizarre travel plans are dancing lessons from god.” – Kurt Vonnegut

“Travel is the healthiest addiction.”

“At the end of the day, it’s all about dirty feet, messy hair, and sparkling eyes.”

“Backpacking is money spent on education.”

Whether you are having a bad day of traveling, or just looking for a good laugh. I hope that this list of short funny travel quotes has brought a smile to your face and you are ready for that next trip! Check out some short travel quotes for Instagram for even more inspiration!

Looking for some more specific travel quotes? Check out these River Quotes & Captions and New York quotes .

Check out these travel itineraries and guides to help plan your next trip abroad!

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125 Hilariously Funny Travel Quotes + Pictures

Disclaimer: Some posts on Tourism Teacher may contain affiliate links. If you appreciate this content, you can show your support by making a purchase through these links or by buying me a coffee . Thank you for your support!

Are you looking for some hilariously funny travel quotes? Then you have come to the right place! Lets face it, we all need a laugh from time to time and funny travel quotes can help to brighten the mood whatever the weather! Whether you are in search of a funny travel caption for Instagram , a funny travel quote for a presentation or a funny travel quote for a written document, I have you covered in this post. Read on for some funny travel quote inspiration!

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Funny vacation quotes

Sarcastic funny travel quotes, funny travel quotes for instagram.

Lets start off this post by taking a lo0ok at some of the very best funny travel quotes. Here are my top picks-

I wish I had never gone travelling. Said no one ever.

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magasine!

I’m not lost, I’m exploring.

All you need is  love  a passport

Tan lines and unforgettable times.

Lets wander where the WiFi is weak.

I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords.

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.

The tans will fade, but the memories will last forever.

Good things come to those, who book flights. 

I followed my heart and it led me to the airport. 

There are many famous funny travel quotes that we hear quoted regularly, here are some of the best-

Don’t worry about the world ending today, it’s already tomorrow in Australia . – Charles M. Schulz

I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them. – Mark Twain

Jet lag is for amateurs. – Dick Clark

A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. – John Steinbeck

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. – Henry Youngman

“There is nothing safer than flying, it’s crashing that is dangerous.” – Theo Cowan

You define a good flight by negatives: you didn’t get hijacked, you didn’t crash, you didn’t throw up, you weren’t late, you weren’t nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.– Paul Theroux

Drink heavily with the locals whenever possible. – Anthony Bourdain

I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine. – Caskie Stinnett

The worst thing about being a tourist, is having other tourists recognise you as a tourist! – Russell Baker

Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo. —Al Gore  

Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything. – Steve Martin 

What are the most popular funny travel quotes? I have summarised them for you here-

I need Vitamin Sea

I need a vacation of 6 months. Twice a year!

Work, save, travel , repeat.

Life’s a beach.

I have not travelled everywhere, but it’s on my list.

Life is better at the beach.

Work hard, travel harder.

People having babies.. and I’m like: “What country am I going to next?”

I’m in love with places I’ve never been to.

I googled my symptoms. Turns out I just needed to go on a vacation.

I’m a travel fiend on the road to recovery. Just kidding. I’m headed to the airport.

You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy plane tickets, which is kind of the same thing.

Want to laugh out loud? Then take a look at these funny travel quotes that are sure to make you chuckle!

Beer. Beach. Sunset. What more could you want?!

Fifty shades of.. red, orange, pink, and purple?

Girls just want to have.. sun?

I wish I was a postcard. For under $2 you can travel the world to any location in the world. 

Backpacking is money spent on Education.

I feel like most of my work problems could be solved with a trip to…anywhere.

I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach.

I’ve got 99 problems. But I’m on vacation so I’m ignoring them all!

A plane ticket is the answer. Who cares what the question is.

If you had to choose between true love or travelling the world, which country would you visit first? 

Some people spend their life searching for “the one”. I’m just searching for the one good travel deal.

Vacation calories don’t count, right?

I want to live in the world where searching for plane tickets burns calories.

Running to the gate is my cardio.

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need a trip.

These funny travel quotes are sure to make you giggle too-

Me: “I want to travel more”, the bank account: “Like, to the park?”

When life knocks you down, roll over and look at the stars.

I love those days when my only decision is whether to go to the beach in the morning or in the afternoon.

Sun of a  beach  that’s a nice sunset

Airports: the only place where drinking 8 AM is socially acceptable

What’s that medical condition called where you constantly need to have a trip booked? 

“Be right back…” Just running away from Monday and going straight to the airport. 

This is me, walking down the aisle (of the airplane).

Getting out of bed would be 10x easier if there was a Caribbean ocean and 30 degree weather waiting outside for you.

Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?

Life is short. Call in sick and book that last minute flight.

Everyone is pregnant, engaged or getting married. I just wanna lose weight and travel.

Should I book another flight to go abroad? Brain: no. Wallet: no. Mom: no. Dog: no. Universe: no…I think I’m gonna book the flight.

Screw the caviar, I want to travel the world!

Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on the beach drinking Margaritas.

I’ve got a crush on the world.

Tripophobia (n.) The fear of not having any travel trips currently booked.

You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.

All I want for Christmas is  you  forever vacation.

Imagine falling in love with someone and then finding out they clap their hands when the plane lands.

I love those days when my only decision is window or aisle.

Can we just skip to the part in my life where I travel the world?

I just need a large coffee, a plane ticket and a bag full of cash. 

The airport is a lawless place. 7 am? Drink a beer. Tired? Sleep on the floor. Hungry? Crisps now cost £12.

Some funny travel quotes are just silly, but in a good way, of course! Here are my favourites-

Don’t be a tourist, be a traveller.

Not all who wander are lost. They’re just looking for coffee.

By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always travelling & comes to family events tipsy.

My parents complain I travel too much.  I mean, I could be a drug addict, do they realise how lucky they are?

High five if you don’t know what you’re doing with your life and just want to travel the world.

Worrying you’ve accidentally packed 3 kilos of dr*gs and an animal carcass as you walk through “nothing to declare” at the airport.

Don’t make me slap you with my flip flop.

You can’t make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.

Sandy toes and salty kisses.

Kilometres are shorter than miles. Save gas and take your next trip in kilometres.

Birds literally just eat, travel, and make a mess on things they don’t like. I don’t know about you, but that’s the lifestyle I’m striving for.

I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance. 

I love when people say “just quit your job and travel.” Taking an Uber from the bar to my home is the only travel I can afford. 

Ironing boards are surfboards that gave up their dreams and got a boring job. Don’t be an ironing board.

Forget champagne and caviar – Taste the world instead.

I don’t want a house. I just want to travel and pet a lot of dogs.

“You can’t buy happiness” Okay, explain travel then…

Travelling is like a chocolate box. Don’t matter what you get. All is good.

And here are some of the best funny vacation quotes-

I have been to almost as many places as my luggage.

Overpack. It’s why suitcases have wheels now.

It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.

Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito.

You won’t get the holiday blues if you just keep booking holidays.

Packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip. Unpacks 3 months after coming home.

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just want a paycheck to buy plane tickets.

I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m going. Are you coming with me?

Live a life you don’t need a vacation from.

Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.

I need a holiday. And by “holiday” I mean I need to move away and find a job. On the beach. With cocktails. 

Normal life: Wears the same top every day for a week. Packing for 3-day vacation: I’ll probably change a few times a day so I’ll take 21 tops.

There are some funny travel quotes that can be seen as being a bit sarcastic (and you know us Brits love our sarcasm!). Here are some of the most common-m

Can we just skip to the part of my life where I travel the world?

Can’t decide if I need a hug, an XL coffee, 6 ounces of vodka, or 2 months of travel.

I wish that road trips could pay my bills.

Instead of driving a Mercedes to work,  I’d rather ride on a bike to the beach.

The temptation to go to the airport, buy a one-way ticket, leave the country and live on my own has never been so real.

You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license.

I’m busy.

Go to work. Open computer. Scroll for plane tickets for 6 hours. Close computer. Go home.

Work tip: Stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return.

Travitude (n.) when you start to feel grumpy and sassy because you haven’t travelled in a while.

Friend 1: I’m getting a house. Friend 2: I’m having a baby. Friend 3: I’m getting married Me: I’m headed to the airport. 

Reality called, so I hung up.

Travsessed ( n .) An obsession with travel. When all you talk or think about is your past or future trips.

Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.

Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is into me.

Europeans: I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home. Australians: I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland.

And last but not least, here are some of the best funny travel quotes for Instagram-

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.. Then it dawned on me.

Sunsets. Life’s way to saying: ‘good job, you survived another day. Here’s something pretty!

You weren’t born to just pay bills and die.

Work hard. Travel harder.

A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.

At the end of the day.. I’d rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, than a full bank account.

Me thinking about how many flights I can book for the cost of a new iPhone 11 Pro.

I know there is a flight leaving today that could bring me far, far away!

I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.

I just want to travel the world, overspend at IKEA and drink coffee while cuddling puppies.

If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 10-day Caribbean cruise.

Me getting ready for vacation: manicure and pedicure, buy new Sephora products, spray tan, get waxed, get hair done, work out for a month, live off kale and veggies, try on 30K swimsuits and cry in dressing rooms. Husband getting ready for vacation: packs a bathing suit, flip-flops, a T-shirt, and calls it a day.

Funny travel quotes- further reading

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40+ Funny Travel Quotes to Make You Laugh

By: Author Hannah Cooper

Posted on Last updated: January 3, 2024

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There’s nothing like chortling over funny travel quotes to beat the in-between-trips blues. Check out this bumper collection of the funniest, silliest, and most relatable travel quotes out there.

We’ve also included funny travel quotes from movies, TV, and books to inspire your watchlist and next read. 

Short, funny travel quotes

Short and sweet, these funny quotes about travel will have you scrambling for the travel brochures!

“A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.”

“Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is addicted to me?”

“Yeah, working is great. But have you tried traveling?” 

“Running to the gate is my cardio.”

“People having babies. And I’m like…what country am I going to next?”

Me: “I want to travel.” 

My bank account: “Like, to the park?”

Friend: “Let’s go to Bora Bora. 

Me: I wanna, but I’m pora pora.”

“When you’re supposed to take the 8 a.m. train to the office but miss the stop and end up at the airport”

“I love those days when my only decision is whether to go to the beach in the morning or in the afternoon.”

“ I’ve got 99 problems and travel could solve literally all of them .”

“I love my job, but only when I’m on vacation.”

Down-to-earth funny travel quotes

These silly travel quotes are relatable. 

Europeans: “I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home.” Australians: “I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland.”

“Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito.”

“I Googled my symptoms. Turns out I just needed to go on a vacation.”

“I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just want a paycheck to buy plane tickets.”

Friend 1: “I’m getting a house.” Friend 2: “I’m having a baby.” Friend 3: “I’m getting married.” Me: “I’m going to the airport.”

Wise and funny quotes about travel

We can learn from traveling and reading wise yet funny quotes about travel when we’re at home. 

“Once the travel bug bites there is no known antidote, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life.”  ― Michael Palin

“When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee.”  ― Helen Hayes

“Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas and take your next trip in kilometers.” ― George Carlin

 “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” ― Helen Keller

“Because in the end, you won’t remember the time you spent working in the office or mowing your lawn. Climb that goddamn mountain.” ― Jack Kerouac

“Live life with no excuses, travel with no regret.” ― Oscar Wilde

Funny quotes about traveling with kids

Unsurprisingly, most of these funny travel quotes remain anonymous. 

“A road trip is a way for the whole family to spend time together and annoy each other in interesting new places.”  ― Tom Lichtenheld

“Parents don’t really go on holidays. They just look after their kids in a different country for a while.”

“Being on vacation with my family has brought me so much closer to my iPad.”

“You call it chaos. We call it a family vacation.”

“Summer vacations are a time when parents realize that teachers are grossly underpaid.”

Funny anecdotes on X (formerly Twitter)

The bluebird has flown the nest but X, formerly known as Twitter, is still a treasure trove of travel wit and snappy one-liners. Here are the cleverest and funniest plucked from the wittiest social media platform. 

“Hike in groups. Bears like to have options.” ― National Park Service

“Security at every level of the airport is insane until you get to the baggage claim. Then it’s like, take whatever bag you want.” ― Wandering Nick

“The fancier the hotel, the more likely I am to sleep with a towel on my face because I can’t figure out how to turn out all the lights.” ― Jen Rose Smith

“Got to love that final hour of a trip before the airport transfer, when you’re dressed for a flight to London but you’re still in a tropical country so you just… sit there, sweating profusely.”  ― Sarah J C Gillespie

“You know you’re getting older when you arrive at an airport two hours before the flight.” ― James Stewart

“Got an email saying I should get to the airport three hours early because of an update with the security systems. Got here and was through in five minutes. Can’t help feeling my dad is behind all this.”  ― Alexandra Haddow

“If I’m understanding correctly, in Italy, the norm is:

No breakfast, just espresso or cappuccinos.

Have a carb-heavy lunch/multi-hour meal from 1-3.

Take a 4-5 hour nap. Start dinner at 8.

Finish dinner at ~midnight

Drink wine all day.” ― David But In Survival Mode

“My kids mix their languages all the time but my favorite combo is Spanish and Scottish. Asking where a waiter had gone in a restaurant earlier: ‘Dónde está el wee mannie?’” ― Sophie Cameron

“When I worked in an office I asked a younger girl if she’d had a nice time in Ibiza on her first day back and she said, ‘aye it was brilliant we had an amazing time, one of my pals I went with died when we were out there but we still made the most of it.’ ” ― Natalie O’Donoghue

Sarcastic travel quotes

Not forgetting that Twitter is the home of sarcastic travel quotes.

“Baffled by suitcase shops at airports. Are there people who arrive at the airport with piles of clothes in their arms and bunches of underwear slung around their necks, and think, blimey I knew I forgot something?” ― Rory Boland

I tried to take peanut butter through airport security.

TSA: “Sorry, no liquids, gels, or aerosols.”

Me: “I want you to tell me which of those things you think peanut butter is.” ― Patrick Neve

“If you’re at the London fireworks and managed to get a recording on your phone, please make sure to share it. Would love to take a look.” ― Sam Bowman

Silly travel quotes inspired by pop music

Your favorite songs will never be the same again. 

“Oops!… I Traveled Again.”

“Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh,

Caught in bad turbulence…”

“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my itinerary.”

“Hello suitcase, my old friend…”

“Cause if you liked it then you should have put an air tag on it.”

“Oh girls just wanna have trips.”

Funny travel quotes from movies

Watching a travel-themed film is a classic way to buck yourself up when you’re counting down (and saving up) for your next adventure. Especially if it’s a comedy. Let these funny travel quotes from movies inspire you. 

“Great! Where are we going?” ― The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

“Sir , sir? Sir, excuse me. I know this is your cab, but I’m desperately late for a plane, and I was wondering if I could appeal to your good nature and ask you to let me have it.” ― Planes, Trains, and Automobiles (1987)

“First rule of India: there’s always room.” ― The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2004)

Joe Bradley: “Where do you live?”

Princess Ann: “…the Colosseum.”

Joe Bradley [to the taxi driver]: “She lives in the Colosseum.”

Taxi Driver: “Is wrong address!” ― Roman Holiday (1953)

“Just keep swimming.” ― Finding Nemo (2003)

“I’m just completely lost.” ― Lost in Translation (2003)

M. Gustave: “ How fast can you pack ?” Zero: “ Five minutes .” M. Gustave: “ Do it, and bring a bottle of the Pouilly-Jouvet ‘26 in an ice bucket with two glasses, so we don’t have to drink the cat piss they serve in the dining car .” ― The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014)

“For the last six months, he’s gone to Harvard and Berkeley. I’m betting he can get a passport.”  — Catch Me If You Can (2002)

Pippin: “ What about breakfast ?” 

Aragorn: “ Haven’t you had that already ?” 

Pippin: “ We’ve had one, yes. What about second breakfast? ” ― The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

Jack: “What did he say?”

Peter: “He said the train is lost”

Jack: “How can a train be lost? It’s on rails.” ― The Darjeeling Limited (2007)

Funny travel quotes from TV

Not forgetting TV.

“Sicily can be very seductive”. ― ‘That’s Amore’, The White Lotus , Season 2 (2022)

“I’m going to have to go into the map.” ― ‘The One With Ross’s Wedding’, Friends , Season 4 (1998)

“You go to St. Tropez to party, not to work. It’s like going to Ibiza to do your taxes.” ― ‘Do You Know the Way to St. Tropez?’ Emily in Paris , Season 2 (2021)

Funny travel quotes from books

Bookworms and bibliophiles, these will give you something to giggle over. 

“Queuing is a rarity in India but if you are the next in line, you do not stand behind the person being served. You stand next to him. If possible, you stand next to him with one elbow lightly touching his ribs, so that when he moves you are guaranteed your spot.” ― Monisha Rajesh, Around India in 80 Trains

“I think the world divides neatly into those who are excited by the managed induction of terror and those who are not. I do not find terror exciting : I find it terrifying.” ― David Foster Wallace, A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again

“It used to be a good hotel, but that proves nothing – I used to be a good boy.” ― Mark Twain, The Innocents Abroad

“Being an immigrant is not for the admin-phobic.” ― Helen Russell, The Year of Living Danishly: Uncovering the Secrets of the World’s Happiest Country

“Go back?” he thought. “No good at all! Go sideways? Impossible! Go forward? Only thing to do! On we go!” ― J. R. R. Tolkein, The Hobbit 

Funny travel quotes from Bill Bryson

The eternal expat himself, Bill Bryson deserves his own segment.

“I sat thinking what an odd thing tourism is. You fly off to a strange land, eagerly abandoning all the comforts of home and then expend vast quantities of time and money in a largely futile effort to recapture the comforts you wouldn’t have lost if you hadn’t left home in the first place.” ― Bill Bryson, Neither Here nor There: Travels in Europe

“Suddenly, in the space of a moment, I realized what it was that I loved about Britain . Every last bit of it, good and bad – Marmite, village fetes, country lanes, people saying ‘mustn’t grumble’ and ‘I’m terribly sorry but’, people apologizing to me when I conk them with a nameless elbow, milk in bottles, beans on toast, haymaking in June, stinging nettles, seaside piers, Ordnance Survey maps, crumpets, hot-water bottles as a necessity, drizzly Sundays – every bit of it.” ― Bill Bryson, Notes from a Small Island

*Experience these phenomena in the Peak District , Lake District , and the Yorkshire Dales *

 “I was heading to Nebraska. Now there’s a sentence you don’t want to say too often if you can possibly help it.” ― Bill Bryson, The Lost Continent: Travels in Small-Town America

*Check out alternative US travel destinations *

Funny travel quotes from articles

Closing with some travel stories worth a read for their wit.

“ We had unpacked and gone down into the lobby for a cocktail when it happened. The rain had begun. It rained all night, and all day, and all night again. This was not mild, polite British rain, but a rumbustious, glutinous, violent downpour in the dark, soon accompanied by lightning and thunder which, again, went on interminably, like hours of strobe lighting followed by aerial bombing .” ― Hanif Kureishi, The Guardian

“No, there’s nowt fancy on ferries. They are classless places, for all sorts. This is something you can take in at your leisure, as ships are the only mode of transit I can think of on which you can take a proper stroll.” ― Adrian Chiles, The Guardian

223 Funny Travel Quotes to Put A Smile On Your Face

• Quotes , Travel Tips
• November 18, 2020 November 18, 2020
• 19 min read

Humor will help you transform a bad day, cheer you up and keep you going. That’s one reason we love these funny quotes and wanted to pick some for you.

We hope you enjoy, smile, love and share these funny quotes.

A Full List of Funny Travel Quotes

Let’s start this list of funny travel quotes with a quote Matt likes to use.

1. “Forget champagne and caviar – Taste the world instead!”– Hostelgeeks

2. Me: “I want to travel more”, the bank account: “”Like, to the park?”

3. “I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords!”

4. “Men to the left because woman are always right”.”

5. “The journey, not the arrival, matters.”– T. S. Eliot

6. “Once a year, go somewhere you’ve never been before.”– The Dalai Lama

7. It’s bad manners to let vacation wait!

8. “Have a fun(tache)tic day!.”

9. “Most things in life people are worried about, never happen anyway!.”

10. “Never stop doing things for the first time.”

11. “I can’t control the wind but I can adjust the sail.”– Ricky Skaggs

12. “A journey is measured in friends rather than miles.”– Tim Cahill

13. “Do not follow where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”– Ralph Waldo Emerson

14.  “Laugh more, worry less!”

15. “I want to make memories all over the world.”

16. “If you are upset just think about a T-Rex trying to drink a Martini.”

17. “Don’t be a tourist, be a traveler.”

18. “Buy the ticket, take the ride.”

19. “If you think adventure is dangerous try routine, it’s lethal.”– Paulo Coelho

20. “Quit your job, buy a ticket, get a tan, fall in love, never return.”– Anonymous

21. “I’m in love with places I’ve never been to.”

22. “Free Boobs! Just kidding – Free Fruit!”– by Swanky Hostel , the 5 Star Hostel in Zagreb.

22. “When life knocks you down, roll over and look at the stars.”

23. “If you don’t belong, don’t be too long.”

24. “I need vitamin SEA.”

25.“The people who made you laugh are more beautiful than beautiful people.”

26. “People don’t take trips. . . trips take people.”– John Steinbeck

27. “Make salsa, not war!”

28. “I hate traveling, no traveler ever said”

29. “Don’t look for love. Look for good coffee!”

30. You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…

31. Life goal: Create a life that people assume you have anyway based on your instagram account!

32. “I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.”– Caskie Stinnett

33. There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.

34. If traveling was free, BYE!

35. “I’ve got 99 problems. But I am on vacation and I am ignoring them all!”

36. “Worst thing about being a tourist, is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist!”– Russell Baker

37. “And then I went to the Sangria Familia…!”

38. “Jet Lag is for Amateurs”

39. “Work hard, travel harder”

40. I will conquer the world. Like, from here to the post box.

41. If travel would be free, you would never see me again. But it isn’t, so….what do we do tonight?

42. Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.– George Carlin

43. If you are going through hell, keep going.– Winston Churchill

44. A change of latitude would help my attitude.

45. Suitcases are for princesses!

46. “The best things in life are free. The 2nd best things are super expensive!”

47. “I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.”– Susan Sontag

48.Reality called, so I hung up.

49.Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, “What! You Too? I thought I was the only one.”

50.Kinda classy, kinda hood.

51. I need a vacation of 6 months. Twice a year!

52. I changed my password to incorrect. So whenever I forget my password, the login tells me, the password is incorrect.

53. Whenever you feel sad, remember, that somewhere in the world there is a guy pulling a door that says push.

54. All I want in life is pancakes!

55. “Live with no excuses and travel with no regrets.”

56. “The gladdest moment in human life, me thinks, is a departure into unknown lands.”

57. “Every day can be an adventure.”- Hostelgeeks

58. Stuck somewhere between “I need to save” and “you only live once”. 

59. Friend: Let’s go to Bora Bora. Me: Man, I wanna go, but I’m pora pora.

60. My favourite childhood memory is my parents paying for my holidays.

61. When you’re trying to save money for a house, but end up with a one-way ticket to some tropical island.

62. Me before vacation: “I’m going to be responsible with my money. This is a low budget trip. I’m gonna stay in a hostel and everything.”Me on vacation: *orders fancy drinks, rides a jetski, goes skydiving, buys souvenirs for the uncle’s new girlfriend and adopts an alpaca.*

63. I need a reasonably paid job. Something like $2000 an hour. Nothing too wild…

64. Me: “I want to travel more”, the bank account: “Like, to the park?”

65. If traveling was free, BYE!

66. I wish that road trips could pay my bills.

67. At the end of the day…I’d rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, than a full bank account.

68. I wish I was a postcard. For under $2 you can travel the world to any location in the world. 

69. Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?

70. I wish travel therapy was covered by my health insurance. 

71, Backpacking is money spent on Education.

72. Bank account nice and empty. Starting the new year on a clean slate.

73. How can people my age plan spontaneous trips to Thailand, I can barely afford a spontaneous soft pretzel.

74. I love when people say “just quit your job and travel.” Taking an Uber from the bar to my home is the only travel I can afford.

75. Go to work. Open computer. Scroll for plane tickets for 6 hours. Close computer. Go home.

76. I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords!

77. Work tip: Stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return.

78. Yeah, working is great…but have you tried travelling. 

79. There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.

80. Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito. 

81. Ironing boards are surfboards that gave up their dreams and got a boring job. Don’t be an ironing board.

82. Life is short. Call in sick and book that last minute flight. 

83. I feel like most of my work problems could be solved with a trip to…anywhere.

84. I googled my symptoms. Turns out I just needed to go on a vacay.

85. I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach.

86. Everyone is pregnant, engaged or getting married. I just wanna lose weight and travel.

87. Forget champagne and caviar – Taste the world instead

88. I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine

89. I just want to travel the world, overspend at IKEA and drink coffee while cuddling puppies.

90. Friend 1: I’m getting a house. Friend 2: I’m having a baby. Friend 3: I’m getting married Me: I’m headed to the airport.

91. People having babies…and I’m like: What country am I going to next?

92. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just want a paycheck to buy plane tickets.

93. I don’t want a house. I just want to travel and pet a lot of dogs.

94. Screw the caviar, I want to travel the world!

95. Reality called, so I hung up.

96. I need 6 months of vacation. Twice a year.

97. I’m a travel addict on the road to recovery. Just kidding. I’m headed to the airport.

98. I’ve got 99 problems. But I’m on vacation so I’m ignoring them all!

99. “You can’t buy happiness” Okay, explain travel then…

100. It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.

101. Travsessed (n.) An obsession with travel. When all you talk or think about is your past or future trips

102. Good things come to those, who book flights.

103. I heard an airplane passing overhead. I wished I was on it.

104. Tripophobia (n.) The fear of not having any travel trips currently booked.

105. You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy plane tickets, which is kind of the same thing.

106. Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas and take your next trip in kilometers.

107. A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.

108. “Be strong”, I whisper to my WiFi signal

109. Jetlag is for amateurs

110. My parents complain I travel too much. I mean, I could be a drug addict, do they realize how lucky they are?

111. A plane ticket is the answer. Who cares what the question is.

112. Don’t speak the language. Already said 3 times “what”. Now just smile and nod and hope for the best.

113. Me travelling. Person: “Un Cafe?” Me: “Oui” Person: “Sucre” Me: “Non” Person: “You speak very good french” Me: “Gracias”

114. You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.

115. Have you ever stopped to think, maybe travel is addicted to me?

116. Education is important. But travel is importanter!

117. If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 7-day Caribbean cruise.

118. Me thinking about how many flights I can book for the cost of a new iPhone 11 Pro.

119. Europeans: I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home. Australians: I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland.

120. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m going. Are you coming with me?

121. That moment when you’re asked where you got something and you answer with the name of the country, not the name of the store.

122. Travelling is like a chocolate box. Don’t matter what you get. All is good.

123. Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.

124. All you need is love a passport.

125. I followed my heart and it led me to the airport. 

126. If you had to choose between true love or travelling the world, which country would you visit first? 

127. All I want for Christmas is you forever vacation.

128. Imagine falling in love with someone and then finding out they clap their hands when the plane lands.

129. Some people spend their life searching for “the one”. I’m just searching for the one good travel deal.

130. I’ve got a crush on the world.

131. I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!

132. Birds literally just eat, travel, and shit on things they don’t like. I don’t know about you, but that’s the lifestyle I’m striving for.

133. By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always travelling & comes to family events tipsy.

134. High five if you don’t know what you’re doing with your life and just want to travel the world.

135. I want to live in the world where searching for plane tickets burns calories.

136. Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on the beach drinking Margaritas.

137. Be afraid. And do it anyway.

138. Can we just skip to the part in my life where I travel the world?

139. I just need a large coffee, a plane ticket and a bag full of cash. 

140. Getting out of bed would be 10x easier if there was a Caribbean ocean and 30 degree weather waiting outside for you.

141. I love those days when my only decision is whether to go to the beach in the morning or in the afternoon.

142. Live a life you don’t need a vacation from.

143. Work hard. Travel harder.

144. I need a holiday. And by “holiday” I mean I need to move away and find a job. On the beach. With cocktails. 

145. The temptation to go to the airport, buy a one-way ticket, leave the country and live on my own has never been so real.

146. Ladies, imagine this. It’s 15 years from now, and you have no kids. You’re the cool wine aunt that occasionally comes back to the country for a brief visit before leaving for another long exotic vacation. You have no commitments, and a suspicious amount of money.

147. Packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip. Unpacks 3 months after coming home.

148. Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.

149. Me: triple checked packing list Also me: *forgets underwear, contact solution, and favourite chapstick*.

150. Watches Netflix happily. Remembers you need to pack. Watches Netflix stressfully.

151. Me: I’m not going to overpack this time. Inner me: I need this. I will need that as well. I need everything.

152. Procrastapacking (n.) the act of thinking about packing a suitcase instead of actually doing it.

153. Overpack. It’s why suitcases have wheels now.

154. I haven’t worn these trousers since I bought them. I should definitely pack them for my 3 day vacation. Just in case.

156. So, do I live out of a suitcase for the next month? Do I unpack just to repack again? Do I put my toothbrush back in the bathroom? I’m a visitor in my own house what the heck.

157. My favourite thing to pack on trips are all the clothes I never wear at home and then find fun, flirty and exciting ways to not wear them while I’m away.

158. Normal life: Wears the same top every day for a week. Packing for 3-day vacation: I’ll probably change a few times a day so I’ll take 21 tops.

159. I have been to almost as many places as my luggage.

160. Me getting ready for vacation: manicure and pedicure, buy new Sephora products, spray tan, get waxed, get hair done, work out for a month, live off kale and veggies, try on 30K swimsuits and cry in dressing rooms. Husband getting ready for vacation: packs a bathing suit, flip-flops, a T-shirt, and calls it a day.

161. Running to the gate is my cardio.

162. Airports: the only place where drinking 8 AM is socially acceptable.

163. The airport is a lawless place. 7 am? Drink a beer. Tired? Sleep on the floor. Hungry? Chips now cost 17$.

164. A passport holder sounds like a great idea until you get to the airport and have to remove it 4 billion times.

165. Worrying you’ve accidentally packed 3 kilos of cocaine and a dead goat as you walk through “nothing to declare” at the airport.

166. I love those days when my only decision is window or aisle.

167. “Be right back…” Just running away from Monday and going straight to the airport.

168. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need a trip.

169. Vacation calories don’t count, right?

170. What’s that medical condition called where you constantly need to have a trip booked? 

171. Should I book another flight to go abroad? Brain: no. Wallet: no. Mom: no. Dog: no. Universe: no…I think I’m gonna book the flight.

172. You can’t make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.

173. TIP: You won’t get the holiday blues if you just keep booking holidays.

174. You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…

175. In desperate need of a full body massage, 4 days of sleep and a ticket to the Bahamas.

176. Can’t decide if I need a hug, an XL coffee, 6 shots of vodka, or 2 months of travel.

177. Travitude (n.) when you start to feel grumpy and sassy because you haven’t travelled in a while.

178. My mom watches a special type of news program that only reports on horrible incidents happening in places I’m about to visit.

179. “The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist.” – Russell Baker

180. “On a New York subway you get fined for spitting, but you can throw up for nothing.” – Lewis Grizzard

181. “Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything.” – Steve Martin

182. “”I’ve been to almost as many places as my luggage.” –Bob Hope

183. “”Spain travel tip: If bathroom genders are indicated by flamingos, the boy flamingo is the one with a hat. I learned this the hard way.” – Dave Barry

184. “Two great talkers will not travel far together.” – Spanish Proverb

185. “When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money.” – Unknown

186. “Las Vegas is sort of how God would do it if he had money.” – Steve Wynn

187. “Travel becomes a strategy for accumulating photographs.”–Susan Sontag

188. “Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.” – Mark Twain

189. “You and I come by road or rail, but economists travel on infrastructure.” – Margaret Thatcher

190. “The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.” – Henry David Thoreau

191. “You want to know what it’s like to be on a plane for 22 hours? Sit in a chair, squeeze your head as hard as you can, don’t stop, then take a paper bag and put it over your mouth and nose and breath your own air over and over and over.” –Lewis Black

192. “Airline travel is hours of boredom interrupted by moments of stark terror.” – Al Bolisk

193. “Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” – Andre Guide

194. “I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them”. –Mark Twain

195. “The cool thing about being famous is traveling. I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff.” – Britney Spears

196. “In America, there are two classes of travel— first class, and with children.” –Robert Benchley

197. “I have wandered all my life, and I have also traveled; the difference between the two being this, that we wander for distraction, but we travel for fulfillment.” – Hilaire Belloc

198. “Too often travel, instead of broadening the mind, merely lengthens the conversations.” – Elizabeth Drew

199. “Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature.” – Helen Keller

200. “Hey, people who travel with their bed pillow. You look insane.” – Jim Gaffigan

201. “A tourist is a fellow who drives thousands of miles so he can be photographed standing in front of his car.” –Emile Ganest

202. “You know you’re in India when you hear yourself telling your driver as he is backing up, “Careful, there is a cow behind you.” – Lydia Ramsey

203. “Travelling is like flirting with life. It’s like saying, ‘I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station. ” – Lisa St. Aubin de Teran

204. “It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on earth has ever produced the expression, ‘As pretty as an airport.” – Douglas Adams

205. “Adventure, yeah. I guess that’s what you call it when everybody comes back alive.” – Mercedes Lackey

206. “Los Angeles is where you go when you want to be somebody. New York is where you go when you are somebody. Miami is where you go when you want to be somebody else.” – Billy Corben

207. “If you come to a fork in the road, take it.” – Yogi Berra

208. “Don’t worry about the world ending today, it’s already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles M. Schulz

209. “There is nothing safer than flying – it’s crashing that is dangerous.” – Theo Cowan

210. “The first condition of understanding a foreign country is to smell it.” – Rudyard Kipling

211. “Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” – Al Gore

212. “If you are going through hell, keep going.” – Winston Churchill

213. “When you travel, remember that a foreign country is not designed to make you comfortable. It is designed to make its own people comfortable.” – Clifton Fadiman

214. ” is the tiniest food I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Any kind of meat that you get – chicken, steak, anything – has grill marks on each side, like somehow we’ll actually believe there’s an open-flame grill in the front of the plane.” – Ellen DeGeneres

215. “A good holiday is one that is spent among people whose notions of time are vaguer than yours.” – J.B. Priestley

216. “Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.” – George Carlin

217. “Bizarre travel plans are dancing lessons from God.” – Kurt Vonnegut

218. “I kept my babies fed. I could have dumped them, but I didn’t. I decided that whatever trip I was on, they were going with me. You’re looking at a real daddy.” – Barry White

219. “People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D. Runes

220. “If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might better stay home.” – James Michener

221. “I get pretty much all the exercise I need walking down airport concourses carrying bags.” –Guy Clark

222. “If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine; it’s lethal.” – Paulo Coelho

223. “You define a good flight by negatives: you didn’t get hijacked, you didn’t crash, you didn’t throw up, you weren’t late, you weren’t nauseated by the food. So you are grateful.” – Paul Theroux

It’s not a matter of where, but when. Time is precious and my time spent living and experience the cultures of this world is what I lust for. This is why I created this website, to share true, genuine experiences and not just typical touristy info. Travel, the love of coffee , and food!

50+ Funny quotes on travel to laugh right now

We love travel quotes! We get inspired by wise solo travel quotes , but there are also funny travel quotes that make us laugh and relate with those unique moments and situations of traveling. And who doesn’t like a good old laugh?

Travel should be fun! We’ll prove it to you in this article, by sharing our 50+ top picks for funniest and most relatable quotes on travel. We guarantee they will make you laugh out loud while you wait for your next adventure. Post them in social media, share the images to Pinterest, or send them to a friend who’s planning their solo trip .

We also have a list of the funniest vacation memes , see it here. 

• 1 Laughable quotes about travel & money
• 2 Funny quotes about work & travel
• 3 Amusing travel quotes about holidays
• 4 Funny quotes about travel & happiness
• 5 Witty quotes about travel & life
• 6 Comical and relatable travel quotes

Laughable quotes about travel & money

Whether you’re saving for your next trip or trying to stick to your budget abroad, take a look at these funny quotes about a famous love-hate relationship: money and travel.

“My favorite childhood memory is my parents paying for my holidays.”

Those times are surely missed.

“If traveling was free, BYE!”

Just one word left to say: Book that flight.

“Me before vacation: I’m going to be responsible with my money. This is a low budget trip. I’m gonna stay in a hostel and everything. Me on vacation: *orders fancy drinks, rides a jetski, goes skydiving, buys souvenirs for the uncle’s new girlfriend and adopts an alpaca.*”

Sometimes you get crazy while traveling. You only live once, right?!

“Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?”

Oops! It happened again.

“Backpacking is money spent on Education.”

The best way to spend money!

“Me: I want to travel more , the bank account: Like, to the park? ”

Sometimes, the only trip our wallets can afford.

Funny quotes about work & travel

Work pays travel bills! We know work is tightly related to travel in this and many other ways. That is why we added this section with a funny take on work and travel . Because nothing makes work better than a funny travel quote to go with it.

“Go to work. Open computer. Scroll for plane tickets for 6 hours. Close computer. Go home.”

Wouldn’t this be a great job to have?

“Work tip: Stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return.”

Best work advice we’ve ever heard.

“I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just want a paycheck to buy plane tickets.”

All travel lovers and addicts will identify themselves with this funny travel quote.

“There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.”

It’s harder than it looks. We all know that vacations have many benefits that carry over after we return, but it does not mean we want to return!

“I love my job, only when I’m on vacation.”

Are we the only ones looking for jobs that give us the freedom to do what we want including going on vacation?

“Travel mode ON. Do not disturb.”

Travel mode ON, the rest doesn’t matter, work can wait, emails can wait, messages can wait.

Amusing travel quotes about holidays

Going on a vacation is one of the best feelings in the world. Check out these funny quotes about vacations. For extra laughs, check out our vacation travel memes .

“Most of my work problems could be solved with a trip to…anywhere.”

Travel is important and is a simple solution to all problems.

“I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach.”

Nothing more exhausting than not being on holiday.

“I need 6 months of vacation. Twice a year.”

This is a life or death matter. 

“I’ve got 99 problems. But I’m on vacation so I’m ignoring them all!”

Gotta love vacations.

“It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.”

It’s incredibly rude!

“If anyone is Christmas shopping for me, I wear a size 7-day River cruise.”

Send this funny quote to someone who needs to know, some subliminal marketing never killed nobody.

“I googled my symptoms. Turns out I just needed to go on a vacay.”

It;s the right prescription for those who have headaches, anxiety, burnout, stress, lack of creativity and basically, any other ailment.

“Traveling is like flirting with life. It’s like saying, ‘I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station. ”

It’s a complicated relationship, yet it fills our souls. 

Funny quotes about travel & happiness

Travel is full of ups and downs, but the whole experience will always boost our mood in a good way. These are the funniest travel quotes related to happiness.

“You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy plane tickets, which is kind of the same thing.”

They’re practically synonyms. 

“A plane ticket is the answer. Who cares what the question is.”

We’re certain a plane ticket will always make everything better.

“Traveling is like a chocolate box. It doesn’t matter what you get. All is good.”

What matters is to go on an adventure.

“Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.”

Indeed! We love to empower women to travel the world solo , safely and on their own terms. Check out our online course Empowerful to find the tools to travel solo.

“All I want for Christmas is you forever vacation.”

The song lyrics got it all wrong. 

“Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on the beach drinking margaritas.”

Having principles and something to hold on to as truth is important. But as this humorous travel quote illustrates, your beliefs could be as simple as a vacation.

“You can’t make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.”

Because who isn’t happy about going on a trip? We have never met anyone who wasn’t excited to travel.

“Fifty shades of.. red, orange, pink, and purple?”

Watching sunsets abroad brings us back to life!

“I just want to travel the world, overspend at IKEA and drink coffee while cuddling puppies.”

Serious life goals, does it get any better? While you may think this is a hilarious travel quote, IKEA is indeed therapeutic, as is cuddling a puppy. They are both proven to improve your mood and calm you down. Well, maybe just the puppy, IKEA can also be maddening and stressful!

Witty quotes about travel & life

What is life without travel? Travel inspires us, makes us grow, builds up our confidence, and has many other benefits . Laugh with these witty quotes on travel and life.

“I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.”

This is a bit of an inspirational quote also, but it’s also a reminder to not let your life be absorbed by routine. We encourage you to always make room for spontaneity, curiosity and, of course, travel! 

“Friend 1: I’m getting a house. Friend 2: I’m having a baby. Friend 3: I’m getting married. Me: I’m headed to the airport.”

Travel can be as much a life goal as anything else. After all, having a family or getting a house are but amazing adventures and what is more exciting than boarding a plane to an undiscovered destination?

“I hate traveling, no traveler ever said”

Have you ever heard anyone say that? Neither have we!

You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…

This comical travel quote has made you check your ID photo, haven’t you? So what’s the verdict? Do you need a trip ASAP?

“Can we just skip to the part of my life where I travel the world?”

Fast forward to that part…

“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine, it’s lethal.” – Paulo Coehlo

Another great quote about routine to inspire us and set off on that adventure to an amazing destination !

“There ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them”. – Mark Twain

This is 100% true! If you really want to get to know somebody, be his/her travel buddy once. That will be enough.

“Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito.”

That mental state sounds great. If you find a way to replicate it, let us know!

Comical and relatable travel quotes

Whether it’s complaining about packing or suffering during a flight, every traveler will relate to some of these funny quotes about travel.

“You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.”

We don’t want to ever feel that level of fear again.

“Europeans: I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home. Australians: I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland.”

Our Co-Founder Meg is an Aussie and can testify this.

“Going on a trip. Need about 5 outfits. I’ve packed 35 just to be safe.”

If you always overpack, we’ll help you learn how to pack wisely .

“Packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip. Unpacks 3 months after coming home.”

Unpacking is harder than it looks like. The next quote tells us why:

“Having to unpack my suitcase after a vacation is like the ultimate emotional baggage.”

We don’t want to let go of that vacation feeling.

“My favorite thing to pack on trips are all the clothes I never wear at home and then find fun, flirty and exciting ways to not wear while away.”

Why do we do it? Because we always want to make sure we will have a ball gown in case we are invited to a gala, and cute dresses for that special date with a local handsome guy and three changes of clothes for our Instagram photoshoot. Just in case…

“Airports: the only place where drinking at 8 AM is socially acceptable.”

The great thing about airports is there are no rules and it is always 5pm at some destination.  

“Airline travel is hours of boredom interrupted by stark moments of terror.” – Al Boliska

Did you identify with this one? Or do you like flying? Our first time flying tips article may be helpful to tame those nerves.

“Babies: cry all flight long. Fall asleep during landing.”

It’s like they have it all planned out to make us suffer.

“Running to the gate is my cardio.”

Worried about not doing exercise during your travels? Believe us when we say you will do lots of it, whether it’s running to the gate to catch your flight or walking thousands of steps a day to see all your favorite landmarks. Travel is the best exercise there is!

“People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D. Runes

Isn’t this a comical travel quote? But oh so true! There’s something about being abroad that makes it more exciting, even if you are surrounded by the same people you find down the street. 

“This is the first year I’m not going to Fiji because of COVID-19. Normally, I do not go because I am poor.” — Brooke Miller

COVID gave us a new excuse to postpone that lifelong dream. Don’t wait anymore, start saving for travel now! 

If you know more funny travel quotes, share them with us in the comment section below!

And if you feel like laughing a bit more, go to our funny travel memes article .

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25 Funny Quotes About Travel

By: Nick Callos

Wishing you could travel right now?

After all, exploring the best corn mazes in the USA , relaxing on the stunning beaches of Thailand , or touring London all sound better than working and running errands.

To get you excited about your next adventure, we’ve compiled a list of funny quotes about travel. It’s all in an effort to brighten your day. From funny quotes from movies to Mark Twain travel quotes, we’ll cover a variety of humorous things people have said about vacationing.

So, here are 25 funny travel quotes. After reading (and lol’ing), you’ll have even more motivation to pack your bags and hit the road.

Funny Travel Quotes That Explain Why You Must Travel (and Inspire You to Hit the Road!)

If you carry a travel writing notebook, record some of these funny quotes about travel. They’ll not only give you a laugh, but they’ll also remind you why travel is so important.

Take these very truthful and funny travel quotes to heart:

“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine; it is lethal.” – Paulo Coelho

“Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life.” – Robin S. Sharma

“Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.” -Unknown (this funny travel quote calls us to live in the present )

“There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.” -Unknown

“I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” – Susan Sontag

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” – Helen Keller

“Boy, those French. They have a different word for everything.” – Steve Martin

Overemployment: What It Is, How to Be Overemployed, and How It Can Accelerate Your Path to Financial Freedom

Overemployment is the act of working two remote full-time jobs to earn extra income and reach financial freedom. More than simply having a side hustle, being overemployed means having two or more full-time jobs that offer salary and benefits. While overemployment may sound difficult and potentially hazardous if caught, the fact is any remote worker can do it successfully with the right approach and commitment.

Read the Guide

Funny quotes about flying, arriving, and departing.

The journey matters most. The anticipation and excitement when moving from point A to B can uplift the soul like few other things. You get to reflect on the memories you’ve just made and prepare for the awesome experiences ahead.

Check out these funny quotes about flying and being in transit:

“There’s something about arriving in new cities, wandering empty streets with no destination. I will never lose the love for the arriving, but I’m born to leave.” – Charlotte Eriksson

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” – Neale Donald Walsch

“The journey itself is my home.” – Matsuo Basho (more insightful than funny, but worth including)

“I need a 6-month vacation twice a year.” -Unknown (but you can buy the t-shirt on Amazon !)

“Adventure, yeah. I guess that’s what you call it when everybody comes back alive.” – Mercedes Lackey

“There is nothing safer than flying—it’s crashing that is dangerous.” – Theo Cowan

“Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” – Al Gore

“Work tip: stand up. Stretch. Take a walk. Go to the airport. Get on a plane. Never return.” -Unknown

Funny Travel Quotes from Movies

Think of some of those great travel movies, like The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Up in the Air, and Easy Rider. You’ll find lots of lines in there that are absolute gems.

Below are some funny travel quotes from movies. Memorize them and quote them at the right moment (you’ll certainly get a laugh!).

“That wasn’t flying; that was falling with style.” -Woody, talking about Buzz Lightyear, in Toy Story

“I didn’t come here to make an impression on anybody. I just came here to blow every last cent I had.” -Queen Latifah (as Georgia Byrd) in Last Holiday

“We live, we die, and the wheels on the bus go round and round.” -Jack Nicholson (as Edward Cole) in The Bucket List

Bob: “I don’t want to leave.”

Charlotte: “So don’t. Stay here with me. We’ll start a jazz band.”

-Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray in Lost in Translation

“We haven’t located us yet.” -Wallace Wolodarsky (as Brendan) in The Darjeeling Limited , when the train becomes unexpectedly lost

“Toto, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore” -Judy Garland (as Dorothy) in The Wizard of Oz

Funny Mark Twain Travel Quotes

To conclude our list of funny travel quotes, we’re including a section for Mark Twain travel quotes. He’s one of my favorite authors, and truly one of the greatest travel writers ever. He also excelled at sarcasm and humor.

Read over these thought-provoking Mark Twain travel quotes if you need inspiration and a good laugh:

“I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.” -Mark Twain, from Tom Sawyer Abroad

“There is no unhappiness like the misery of sighting land (and work) again after a cheerful, careless voyage.” -Mark Twain, from “ Notebooks & Journals , Volume I: (1855-1873)”

“Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.” -Mark Twain, from Life on the Mississippi

(And an insightful one): “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.” -Mark Twain, from The Innocents Abroad

Read Funny Travel Quotes for Inspiration and Smiles

That wraps up our list of funny quotes about travel. We’ll constantly add to this list. Check back periodically to see even more funny quotes about vacation, flying, and more.

We hope reading these funny travel quotes has made you chuckle. Even more important, we hope it motivates you to go explore new places and have unforgettable experiences. That’s what life is all about, right?

About the Author

Nick Callos has always had a passion for reading, writing, and discovering the new and unknown. Originally from Cincinnati, Ohio, Nick holds a Bachelor’s Degree in English from Boston College. He currently splits his time between his hometown, Chengdu, China, and the open road. A full-time travel writer, Nick hopes his work can inspire others to explore the world more deeply and enjoy the digital nomad lifestyle.

Featured image via Unsplash .

Related posts:

• 2022 Best Digital Nomad Cities: Lisbon, Chiang Mai & More
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• 10 Best Online Volunteer Opportunities: Smithsonian & More
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41 Funny travel quotes to make you SMILE instantly

Time to have a gooooood laugh, time to unveil the best funny travel quotes you will love. We list here a bunch of cool quotes to have a good laugh. Some are funnier, others less, judge for yourself.

These travel quotes are not ordered by any meaning. We just randomly organized them for you.

If you want to read more quotes about traveling with friends, we created also friends travel quotes .

At the end of this post, we have an extra gift for you. You can download the full list of all the fun travel sayings and quotes . You can use this list to create your own t-shirts, home decor, gift for your friends, or whatever you like.

Just download them as a .pdf and go nuts!

More best Instagram captions for different categories in this link.

Now, let’s get this party started:

1. Can we just skip to the part of my life where I travel the world?

2. A good friend visits you in jail. The best friends sit next to you and say

„that was fun“

3. “Screw the caviar, I want to travel the world!” – quote by Hostelgeeks

4. Vacation calories don’t count. Right?

5. Backpacking is money spent on Education.

6. I always want to wear flip flops, but my boss doesn’t like it…guess, I’ve to travel then!

7. Work hard, travel harder.

8. Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas and take your next trip in kilometers.

9. I don’t know what’s coming,

but I already know it’s gonna be awesome!

10. Buy the ticket, take the ride.

11. I wish that road trips could pay my bills.

12. I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!

13. At the end of the day…

I’d rather like to have a lot of stories to tell, than a full bank account.

14. A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.

15. I’m here for the fun!

16. Take me to the next beach, like now!

17. I know there is a flight leaving today

that could bring me far, far away!

18. Work, save, travel, repeat

19. Can you imagine me walking at a beach? This is me, walking down the aisle.

Laugh more: Funny airplane and airport jokes

20. Go no, next week or next month… but GO!

21. I don’t know what’s coming,

22. “Be strong”, I whisper to my WiFi signal!

23. I need 6 months of vacation, twice a year.

24. Jetlag is for amateurs!

25. Me: I want to travel more.

Bank account: like, to the park?

26. People who eat travel are the best.

27. Be a Pineapple:

“Stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside”

28. Life is not a fairytale. If you lose your shoes at midnight, you are drunk!

29. Instead of driving with a Mercedes to work,

I’d rather ride with the bike to the beach.

30. Overpack. It’s why suitcases have wheels now.

31. Girls don’t wait for the prince anymore, they pack and travel the world.

32. It’s called present… it must be a reason for that!

33. I need a friend I can call in the middle of the night, tell him we have to leave, and the only sentence coming back is

„when do we leave?“

34. Your vibe attracts your tribe!

35. The tans will fade, but the memories will last forever.

36. If you did not have a stupid travel story to tell,

you did something terribly wrong!

37. People having babies…and I’m like: What country am I going to next?

38. All you need is love a passport.

39. …and then

I went to see Sangria Familia, touched the Mahal, and finally had some sushi in China! I am a full traveler!

40. Education is important. But travel is importanter!

41. I need a vacation that long, I forget my passwords!

42. My parents complain I travel too much.

I mean, I could be a drug addict, do they realize how lucky they are?

43. I have been to almost as many places as my luggage.

44. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m going. Are you coming with me?

45. Airports : the only place where drinking at 8am is socially acceptable.

46.The perfect fun CoVid-19 travel jokes: Travitude: when you start to feel grumpy and sassy cause you haven’t been traveling.

47. By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always traveling & comes to family events tipsy.

48. It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on earth has ever produced the expression, ‘As pretty as an airport’.

– Douglas Adams 

Extra: Family travel quotes and short travel quotes

49. Never let your memories be greater than your dreams. – Doug Ivester

50. Traveling in the company of those we love is home in motion. – Leigh Hunt

51. Take only memories, leave only footprints. – Chief Seattle

52. When you travel with children you are giving something that can never be taken away… experience, exposure and a way of life. – Pamela T. Chandler

53. Living my best life one plane ticket at a time.

54. Good things come to those who book flights.

55. A family that travels together stays together.

56. Don’t count the days. Make the days count. – Muhammad Ali

57. Family adventures are the best adventures.

58. The biggest risk in life is not taking one.

Download ALL funny travel quotes

Did you find funny travel Instagram captions? Do you love all these awesome travel quotes we collected? We turned them into cool Pinterest pins as well as a free downloadable .pdf .

Just click on the image below or here to save the .pdf to your device. However, if you find these less, you can read more of the best road trip quotes for Instagram here.

Or check out these best travel songs for 2024 if you want songs to inspire your road trip.

Note: You can use all these for your own gifts, creative things you want to do with them.

Why is travel good for you?

Travel more because it is good for your mental well-being because it helps reduce your stress. It can also make you smarter and improve your understanding of other cultures.

What motivates a person to travel?

People travel for various reasons like a need for a change, improve mental health, know more about country's culture, learn life skills and lessons, experience the beauty of the world and many more.

Is traveling important in life?

Traveling is important to get real-life education, improve communication skills, broaden your horizon, relieve stress and of course traveling makes you happier.

Did you have a good laugh? Or a bit at least?

Travel quotes can be a great way to boost your travelers’ confidence, motivation. They can be cheesy to people that do not really value those, but hey, whatever, right?!

Here’s more of our fav quotes for your WhatsApp or wanderlust addiction:

• best Instagram bio quotes
• best travel quotes of all time
• gift ideas for globetrotters
• best travel jokes and puns – Thai and stop me 😉
• cool and funny Instagram captions
• songs about traveling and adventure

Speaking of WhatsApp, find out more cool quotes for your WhatsApp status here.

Over to you.

We would love to make this list of funny travel quotes and sayings bigger and better. Do you know any other cool and fun saying about travel?

Do you know more awesome quotations and sayings we missed?

Then please please please drop us a comment with the quotation below.

We will turn the best ones into cool quotes on Pinterest.

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Hi Anna, I enjoy reading your funny travel blog, Thanks for letting us smile about the talented funny quote that you write, also One more thing I like which is the interesting photo s you selected for the quote Thanks

Wow, I have enjoyed the funny travel quotes you have done good work and you try to people to laugh. I liked this quote “Work hard, travel harder” Thanks for sharing.

The best advice I can give is to meet as many people on your travels as you can

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57 Funny Travel Quotes to cheer up your day

Funny travel quotes are great to cheer up your day and keep the travel bug.

Humor will help you to turn around a bad day, simply a laugh would change your mood! That’s one reason why we do love these funny quotes and wanted to collect some of them for you.

We had a look at the travel quotes out there and we collected these 26 funny travel quotes . Some of these funny quotes we found them on our 5 Star Hostels!

If you find some more, you can always tag us on Instagram , we will be happy to see them.

Read : find more travel quotes for friends here

In case you need more inspiration or just wanna read more travel quotes, we also collected 109 Travel quotes to inspire every traveler .

I hear you wonder: How did we collect so many quotes?

Well, we are quite traditional here: we do always carry with us a travel notebook. There we write all the quotes we have come across during our travels, as well as many other notes. And of course, Pinterest!

More inspiration:

• 109 Travel quotes
• solo travel quotes
• adventure quotes
• Funny travel quotes
• funny travel puns
• jokes about travelling

Well… we let you enjoy this moment.

We hope you do laugh, remember, love and share these funny travel quotes. After all, we know that a sense of travel humor can really lighten your mood. And since a lot can go wrong when exploring this world, a sense of humor is always a good tool to have on hand.

And if you fancy more entertainment, we found a few travelers gift on Amazon, they come with a small zing and fun factor:

A Full List of Funny Travel Quotes

Let’s start this list of funny travel quotes with a quote Matt likes to use.

1. “Forget champagne and caviar – Taste the world instead!”

– Hostelgeeks

2. Me : “I want to travel more”

the bank account : “Like, to the park?”

3. “I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords!”

4. “Men to the left because woman are always right”.”

This is a quote from BUS Hostel, one of the best hostels in Reykjavik .

5. “The journey, not the arrival, matters.”

– T. S. Eliot

6. “Once a year, go somewhere you’ve never been before.”

– The Dalai Lama

7. It’s bad manners to let vacation wait!

8. “Have a fun(tache)tic day!.”

9. “Most things in life people are worried about, never happen anyway!.”

10. “Never stop doing things for the first time.”

11. “I can’t control the wind but I can adjust the sail.”

– Ricky Skaggs

12. “A journey is measured in friends rather than miles.”

– Tim Cahill

13. “Do not follow where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

14.  “Laugh more, worry less!”

15. “I want to make memories all over the world.”

16. “If you are upset just think about a T-Rex trying to drink a Martini.”

17. “Don’t be a tourist, be a traveler.”

18. “Buy the ticket, take the ride.”

19. “If you think adventure is dangerous try routine, it’s lethal.” – Paulo Coelho

20. “Quit your job, buy a ticket, get a tan, fall in love, never return.”

– Anonymous

21. “I’m in love with places I’ve never been to.”

22. “ Free Boobs! Just kidding – Free Fruit! ”

22. “When life knocks you down, roll over and look at the stars.”

23. “If you don’t belong, don’t be too long.”

24. “I need vitamin SEA.”

25.“The people who made you laugh are more beautiful than beautiful people.”

Read : Best solo travel quotes and sayings

26. “People don’t take trips. . . trips take people.”

– John Steinbeck

27. “Make salsa, not war!”

28. “I hate traveling, no traveler ever said”

29. “Don’t look for love. Look for good coffee!”

30. You know it’s time for a vacation when you start looking like the person on your driving license…

31. Life goal: Create a life that people assume you have anyway based on your instagram account!

32. “I travel a lot, I hate having my life disrupted by routine.”

– Caskie Stinnett

33. There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.

34. If traveling was free, BYE!

35. “I’ve got 99 problems. But I am on vacation and I am ignoring them all!”

36. “Worst thing about being a tourist, is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist!”

– Russell Baker

37. “And then I went to the Sangria Familia…!”

38. “Jet Lag is for Amateurs”

39. “Work hard, travel harder”

40. I will conquer the world. Like, from here to the post box.

41. If travel would be free, you would never see me again. But it isn’t, so….what do we do tonight?

42. Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.

– George Carlin

43. If you are going through hell, keep going.

– Winston Churchill

44. A change of latitude would help my attitude.

45. Suitcases are for princesses!

46. “The best things in life are free. The 2nd best things are super expensive!”

47. “I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.”

– Susan Sontag

48. Reality called, so I hung up.

49. Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, “What! You Too? I thought I was the only one.”

50. Kinda classy, kinda hood.

51. I need a vacation of 6 months. Twice a year!

52. I changed my password to incorrect. So whenever I forget my password, the login tells me, the password is incorrect.

53. Whenever you feel sad, remember, that somewhere in the world there is a guy pulling a door that says push.

54. All I want in life is pancakes!

55. “Live with no excuses and travel with no regrets.”

56. “The gladdest moment in human life, me thinks, is a departure into unknown lands.”

57. “ Every day can be an adventure. ” – Hostelgeeks

58. I’m done adulting. Let’s be mermaids from now on!

Read : Funny beach jokes for your vacation

Do you want more entertainment?

Of course you do! We all love more inspiration and entertainment. After all, traveling is entertaining. Or at least, it should be. Here’s more you will love:

• best travel puns of all time
• You can find more +109 travel quotes here
• For having a good laugh, check out all the funny travel stories we collected.

Wait, there is more articles with quotes

Just click on the image below to get more.

Do you know more funny travel quotes?

Then leave your favorite on in the comments section below!

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Travel one liners

I forgot my coffee this morning so I'm gonna drive on the rumble strips along the side of the road all the way to work just to be safe.

Don't worry guys, my wife just turned the car radio down so we shouldn't be lost much longer.

Why don't aliens visit our planet? Terrible ratings. One star.

I WRITE ALL MY JOKES IN CAPITALS. THIS ONE WAS WRITTEN IN PARIS.

Clinging on to past and living is like driving forward while watching the rear view mirror...

Heard about the pilot who decided to cook whilst flying? It was a recipe for disaster.

I applied for a job today and they ask for three references. I wrote, "a dictionary, a Thesaurus, and a map."

What goes through towns, up hills, and down hills but never moves? The road!

I got excited when my son joined the cross-country team. But then I learned they don't cross the country and are back home in a few hours.

I like when flies won't leave my car on long road trips. Have fun moving to Kansas, you tiny idiot.

Funny Quotes about Cruising: Hilarious Jokes & Puns

Posted on Last updated: August 12, 2023

Ahoy there, fellow cruisers! Get ready to embark on a hilarious voyage that will have you rolling in the aisles (or should I say, waves). We’ve scoured the seven seas to bring you a collection of uproarious cruise quotes that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone.

Life at sea can be an adventure filled with laughter, and these side-splitting quotes about cruising capture the essence of that joyous spirit. So whether you’re a seasoned sailor or planning your first nautical escapade, prepare to set sail with a smile on your face.

From witty observations about buffet lines to comical encounters with fellow passengers, these cruise quotes will remind you why laughter truly is the best medicine on board. So buckle up (or should I say, life jacket on) and get ready for a voyage of hilarity as we dive into the world of cruising and humor.

So grab your favorite cocktail, find a cozy spot on deck, and let’s navigate through these uproarious funny quotes about cruising together!

Hilarious Cruise Jokes and One-Liners

Laugh your way through the cruise with these rib-tickling jokes and one-liners. Keep the chuckles coming on board with these hilarious cruise jokes and witty one-liners. Cruise in style while enjoying these belly-shaking jokes and clever one-liners. Add some humor to your vacation by sharing these knee-slapping cruise jokes and quick-witted one-liners.

Cruise ships are known for their luxurious amenities, breathtaking views, and exciting activities. But did you know that they can also be a hub of hilarity? Whether you’re a seasoned sailor or a first-time cruiser, these funny quotes about cruising are sure to make you laugh out loud.

• “Why did the magician bring a ladder on the cruise ship? Because he wanted to perform high seas magic tricks!”
• “What do you call it when sailors argue over who gets to steer the ship? A captain crunch!”
• “Why did the deckhand bring a broom on board? To sweep everyone off their feet!”
• “What’s a sailor’s favorite type of music? Sea shanties!”
• “Why don’t boats like going to parties? They tend to get too rowdy!”
• “What do you call it when two ships collide in the middle of the ocean? A ‘sea-nic’ accident!”
• “Why did the sailor go broke after his cruise vacation? He spent all his money on anchor management classes!”
• “What’s a magician’s favorite part of a cruise ship? The deck of illusions!”
• “Why was the pirate such a good comedian? He had an eye for humor!”
• “What do you call a fish that wears a crown on a cruise ship? The king of the sea-nery!”

These funny quotes about cruising are perfect for lightening up any conversation during your voyage. Share them with fellow passengers and crew members to create a jovial atmosphere on board. Laughter is contagious, and these jokes will surely bring smiles to everyone’s faces.

Imagine sitting at the ship’s bar, sipping your favorite cocktail, and sharing these hilarious cruise jokes with newfound friends. The sound of laughter echoing across the deck will become the soundtrack of your unforgettable journey.

So, next time you embark on a cruise adventure, don’t forget to pack these funny quotes about cruising along with your sunscreen and swimsuit. They are guaranteed to make your trip even more enjoyable and memorable.

Troublesome Tales: Flight, Shower, and Marriage Mishaps on Cruises

Brace yourself for amusing stories of flight mishaps, shower shenanigans, and marriage mayhem on cruises. Let’s dive into the comical tales of misadventures involving flights, showers, and marriages during cruises.

Flight Mishaps

Embarking on a cruise is an adventure in itself, but sometimes the journey to the ship can be just as eventful. Picture this: you’re all set for your dream vacation when you encounter a series of hilarious flight troubles. From delayed departures to lost luggage, these mishaps can turn your trip into an unexpected comedy show.

One traveler recalls how their flight got diverted to a small island due to bad weather conditions. Stranded with limited resources and no immediate way back to civilization, they found themselves living out their own version of “ Cast Away ” – minus Tom Hanks and Wilson the volleyball. Fortunately, they were eventually rescued by a passing cruise ship that happened to spot their distress signals.

Shower Shenanigans

Once aboard the cruise ship, another source of laughter arises from shower mishaps. It seems that even something as simple as taking a refreshing shower can lead to unexpected comedic moments.

Imagine stepping into what you believe is your private oasis only to discover that the glass door has a mind of its own. The moment you turn on the water, it swings open wide for everyone passing by to witness your impromptu performance of “Singing in the Rain.” While it may be embarrassing at first, these incidents often become memorable highlights of the trip as fellow passengers share in the laughter.

Marriage Mayhem

Cruises are popular choices for weddings or vow renewal ceremonies due to their romantic ambiance. However, even amidst such joyous occasions, marital blunders can occur that leave everyone in stitches.

One newlywed couple decided to have their wedding ceremony onboard, surrounded by the breathtaking ocean views. As they exchanged vows, a sudden gust of wind blew the bride’s veil away, sending it soaring into the sea like a runaway kite. The groom’s valiant attempt to catch it only resulted in an unintentional dive off the ship’s deck. Luckily, he was quickly rescued and emerged from the water with a sheepish grin, much to the amusement of everyone present.

Prepare to be entertained by hilarious stories featuring mishaps during flights, showers, and marriages while cruising. These tales serve as a reminder that even amidst unexpected twists and turns, laughter can be found in the most unlikely places.

So next time you embark on a cruise adventure, keep an eye out for those perplexing moments that turn ordinary trips into extraordinary memories. After all, it’s these troublesome tales that make your journey truly unforgettable.

Now that we’ve explored some funny quotes about cruising through troublesome tales of flight mishaps, shower shenanigans, and marriage mayhem on cruises, get ready to set sail on your own adventure filled with laughter and unforgettable experiences. Bon voyage!

Laugh Out Loud with Cruise Puns and Captions

Set sail for laughter with these pun-tastic cruise jokes and clever captions. Make waves of laughter roll in with these side-splitting cruise puns and witty captions. Navigate through hilarity as we present a collection of puns and captions that will leave you in stitches during your cruise adventure. Enjoy a good laugh onboard using these uproarious cruise puns paired with Instagram-worthy captions.

Cruise Puns:

• Cruise Control : “I’m on cruise control, sailing my way to relaxation!”
• Captain Hilarious : “The captain told the funniest jokes, he really knows how to steer us towards laughter!”
• Sailing Cabin Fever : “Beware of catching ‘sailing cabin fever’ – it’s a contagious case of uncontrollable laughter!”
• Dock and Roll : “As we docked at each port, we couldn’t help but roll with laughter at the hilarious sights.”
• Time Cruiser : “On this cruise, I’m not just a traveler; I’m a time cruiser exploring different eras of comedy!”
• Sun-drenched Laughter : “Under the warm sun, our hearts were filled with joy from the endless laughter onboard.”
• Drink & Joke : “Raise your glass and let’s toast to good times filled with drinks and jokes!”

Cruise Captions:

• Punny Portraits : “Sailing through life one pun at a time! #CruiseLife”
• Winds of Laughter : “Let the winds carry your worries away and fill your sails with laughter! #LaughOutLoud”
• Dreaming of Funny Moments : “In my dreams, I’m surrounded by hilarious memories from our incredible cruise vacation! #DreamsWithLaughs”
• Love Boat Comedy Club : “Join us at the Love Boat Comedy Club – where love and laughter set sail together! #CruiseLaughs”
• Bursting with Humor : “My suitcase might be bursting with clothes, but my heart is bursting with laughter! #PunnyVacation”
• Baggage of Laughter : “Leave your worries at the dock and pack your bags full of laughter for this cruise adventure! #UnpackTheLaughs”

Embarking on a cruise is not just about exploring new destinations and enjoying picturesque views; it’s also an opportunity to let loose and have a good laugh. Cruise puns are the perfect way to infuse humor into your journey, creating unforgettable memories.

Imagine yourself aboard the ship, feeling the gentle sway as you indulge in hilarious wordplay. With each passing moment, you’ll find yourself immersed in a sea of laughter. Whether it’s sharing jokes with fellow passengers or being entertained by witty crew members, there’s no shortage of comedic relief on a cruise.

As you settle into your cabin, take a moment to appreciate the cleverness behind cruise puns like “Cruise Control.” This phrase captures the essence of effortlessly gliding through your vacation while embracing relaxation and amusement. It’s all about finding that sweet spot where you can unwind and enjoy life’s comedic moments.

One of the highlights onboard is undoubtedly interacting with the captain. These skilled navigators not only steer the ship but also know how to steer conversations towards laughter.

River Cruise Quotes and Instagram-worthy Captions

Explore the beauty of river cruising with these inspiring quotes and Instagram-worthy captions. Capture the essence of river cruising with these picturesque quotes and captivating captions. Immerse yourself in the world of river cruises through these insightful quotes and eye-catching captions. Enhance your river cruise experience by sharing these enchanting quotes and stunning Instagram captions.

River cruising is a truly magical experience that allows you to discover breathtaking landscapes, charming towns, and fascinating cultures along picturesque waterways. Whether you’re embarking on a romantic cruise or simply seeking adventure, there’s no shortage of memorable moments to capture. To help you document your journey, we’ve compiled a list of motivational cruise captions that perfectly complement your river cruising photos on social media platforms like Instagram.

Motivational Cruise Captions

• “Sailing through life one river at a time.” 🚢
• “Let the current guide you to new horizons.” ⛵
• “Cruising along with no destination in mind.” 🌊
• “Embrace the serenity of the open water.” 🌅
• “Every bend in the river brings a new discovery.” 🌿

River cruising offers a unique blend of relaxation, adventure, and romance all rolled into one unforgettable experience. As you float along tranquil rivers, take in breathtaking sunsets, explore historic landmarks, and indulge in delicious cuisine, make sure to capture those special moments with your camera or smartphone.

Romantic Cruise Captions

• “Love is like a river; it flows endlessly.” 💕
• “Sailing into each other’s hearts on this romantic voyage.” ❤️
• “Finding paradise together one port at a time.” 🏝️
• “Our love story unfolds along the gentle waves.” 💑
• “In each other’s arms, we set sail for forever.” 🌹

River cruises offer the perfect backdrop for romance, allowing you to create lasting memories with your partner. From candlelit dinners under the stars to hand-in-hand strolls through charming riverside towns, there’s no shortage of enchanting moments to share with your loved one.

Instagram Captions

• “River cruising: where every view is postcard-worthy.” 📸
• “Exploring hidden gems one river at a time.” ✨
• “Chasing sunsets and river reflections.” 🌅
• “Wanderlust meets waterlust on this unforgettable journey.” 🌍💧
• “Life is better when you’re cruising down the river.” 🌊🚢

These Instagram captions will help you perfectly capture the essence of your adventure. Whether you’re looking to inspire others to embark on their own river cruise or simply want to reminisce about your incredible journey, these captions are sure to make an impact.

So grab your camera, pack your sense of adventure, and get ready for an extraordinary river cruising experience that will leave you with memories to last a lifetime. Don’t forget to use these funny quotes about cruising as captivating Instagram captions that will transport your followers straight into the world of river cruises!

Navigating Newbie Nervousness on a Cruise

Embarking on your first cruise can be an exciting yet nerve-wracking experience. The thought of being surrounded by experienced cruise passengers and navigating a massive cruise ship might leave you feeling anxious. But fear not! We’ve got you covered with some helpful tips and funny anecdotes that will ease your newbie jitters and ensure a smooth sailing into your next cruise adventure.

Overcome newbie jitters with our helpful tips and humorous anecdotes about first-time cruisers.

Even the most seasoned travelers were once newbies. It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed or unsure about what to expect. To help calm your nerves, we’ve gathered amusing tales from fellow cruisers who have been in your shoes. These stories will not only make you laugh but also provide practical advice for overcoming those newbie jitters.

One common concern among first-time cruisers is the fear of getting lost on the vast cruise ship. Picture this: you’re wandering around, trying to find your cabin, when suddenly you realize you’ve ended up at the wrong end of the ship. Don’t worry; it happens more often than you think! One cruiser shared their experience of accidentally stumbling upon the crew-only area while searching for their cabin. It turned out to be a hilarious encounter with friendly staff who kindly redirected them back to where they needed to be.

Another source of anxiety for newbies is dining etiquette aboard a cruise ship. The thought of formal dinners and multiple-course meals can be intimidating. But remember, everyone was once unfamiliar with the ins and outs of cruise dining. A fellow cruiser recounted their comical mishap when they mistook the bread basket as decoration instead of an actual appetizer option. Their innocent blunder had everyone at their table in stitches, breaking the ice and making lasting friendships.

Sail smoothly into your first cruise by learning from funny stories and practical advice for overcoming newbie nervousness.

These insights will help you navigate your maiden voyage with confidence and a sense of humor.

• Do Your Research : Before setting sail, become a cruise critic! Reading reviews and forums can give you helpful insights into what to expect on your chosen cruise line. It’s also an excellent way to connect with other passengers who may be sailing on the same voyage.
• Plan Ahead : Take the time to plan your activities and excursions in advance. Having a rough itinerary will alleviate any last-minute decision-making stress and allow you to make the most of your time onboard.
• Embrace the Unexpected : Remember that not everything will go according to plan, but that’s part of the adventure! Stay open-minded and be willing to try new things, whether it’s joining an impromptu dance party or participating in onboard games and contests.
• Connect with Fellow Passengers : Don’t be afraid to strike up conversations with fellow cruisers. You’ll quickly realize that many people share similar anxieties and are more than happy to offer friendly advice or share amusing stories from their own cruising experiences.

Unexpected Encounters: Priests and Oceans

Prepare for laughter as we recount hilarious encounters involving priests and the vast oceans during cruises. Picture this: a serene cruise ship gliding through the sparkling seas, passengers basking in the warm sunsets, when suddenly, an unexpected twist of fate brings men of the cloth face-to-face with the wonders of the deep blue sea.

One unforgettable memory involves a priest who embarked on a cruise to explore exotic islands. As he stood on the deck, mesmerized by the breathtaking view of endless water stretching as far as the eye could see, a mischievous wave decided to playfully drench him from head to toe. The sight of this holy man soaked in seawater left everyone onboard in fits of laughter. It was a moment where reality merged with magic, reminding us that even priests can have their fair share of humorous mishaps.

In another comical tale, an author unknown found himself engaged in a lively conversation with a priest while strolling along the shore during a beach excursion. As they exchanged stories about their respective journeys and shared laughter over funny quotes about cruising, they failed to notice that high tide was approaching rapidly. Suddenly, both men found themselves scrambling to escape from an incoming wave that crashed right at their feet. With wet clothes and startled expressions, they couldn’t help but laugh at their unexpected baptism by sea.

The world is full of possibilities. On one particular cruise, passengers were treated to an impromptu sermon delivered by a jovial priest who took advantage of his surroundings. Standing on deck against the backdrop of glistening waters and clear blue skies, he preached about finding solace in nature’s beauty while sprinkling his words with witty anecdotes about life on board. His unique sermon left everyone with smiles on their faces and hearts filled with joy.

Cruising often brings people together in unexpected ways – even priests and the open sea can form a bond. During one voyage, a priest discovered his hidden talent for entertaining fellow passengers with magic tricks. As he performed illusions that seemed to defy reality, the audience was captivated by his skillful sleight of hand. The combination of the priest’s spiritual presence and his surprising magical abilities created an atmosphere of wonder and laughter that made the cruise even more memorable.

Wrapping Up the Funniest Quotes about Cruising

In conclusion, we’ve explored a hilarious collection of quotes that perfectly capture the humor and joy of cruising. From witty one-liners to amusing anecdotes, these quotes are sure to bring a smile to your face and brighten up your day.

We started off with a dose of laughter through cruise jokes and one-liners. These clever quips will have you chuckling as you imagine yourself sailing the seas.

Next, we delved into troublesome tales filled with flight, shower, and marriage mishaps on cruises. These stories remind us that even in the midst of chaos, there’s always room for laughter.

If puns and wordplay tickle your funny bone, then cruise puns and captions are just what you need. These clever play-on-words will leave you giggling uncontrollably while scrolling through your social media feed.

For those seeking inspiration for their river cruises or Instagram posts, we shared some memorable quotes and Instagram-worthy captions that perfectly capture the beauty and serenity of river cruising.

Navigating newbie nervousness on a cruise can be overwhelming at times, but it’s important to remember that laughter is the best medicine. Embrace the unexpected encounters like running into priests or marveling at the vastness of the ocean – they make for great stories!

To wrap it all up, these funny quotes about cruising remind us to embrace life’s adventures with a lighthearted spirit. So whether you’re an experienced cruiser or new to this exciting journey, let these quotes serve as a reminder to find joy in every moment.

Now it’s time for you to embark on your own cruise adventure armed with these hilarious quotes. Share them with friends and family, spread some laughter onboard, and create unforgettable memories along the way.

Frequently Asked Questions

Are these quotes suitable for all ages.

These funny quotes about cruising are generally suitable for all ages. However, it’s always a good idea to consider the audience and their sense of humor before sharing.

Can I use these quotes for social media captions?

Absolutely! These quotes are perfect for adding a touch of humor to your social media posts. They will surely make your followers smile and engage with your content.

Where can I find more funny quotes about cruising?

You can explore various online platforms, such as websites, blogs, or social media pages dedicated to cruising. You can also check out books or magazines that specialize in humor or travel-related topics.

How can I incorporate these quotes into my everyday life?

These funny quotes about cruising can be used in numerous ways. You can share them with friends and family during conversations or gatherings, use them as icebreakers at cruise-themed parties, or simply write them down and keep them handy for whenever you need a good laugh.

Do these quotes have any real-life inspiration behind them?

While some of the quotes may be based on real-life experiences, others are purely fictional creations designed to bring laughter and entertainment. Regardless of their origins, they all aim to celebrate the joyous spirit of cruising.

200 Funniest One-Liners That Will Make Everyone Laugh

• Published on August 22, 2023

Mark Simons

Ever been caught between a chuckle and a guffaw, all thanks to a succinct punchline? One-liners have the uncanny ability to condense a world of humor into a single, potent sentence. 

In this post, we will traverse the witty lanes and alleyways of humor, bringing you 200 of the best one-liners to tickle your funny bone and brighten up your day. Jump in and start laughing now!

Table of Contents

Everyday Quirks One-Liners

• “I mentioned to my wife that her eyebrow sketches were lofty. She raised an eyebrow.”
• “On my whiskey diet, I’ve misplaced a few days this week.”
• “Diving into a book on floating in space. I just can’t set it aside!”
• “I don’t grapple with madness; I relish its every tick.”
• “My bed’s an enchanted zone where all forgotten tasks resurface.”
• “Once, I played the piano by just listening, but now my fingers dance on it.”
• “I’m on good terms with most letters, but ‘y’ remains a mystery.”
• “Asked the librarian for a book on being overly cautious. She hushed, ‘They’re right over your shoulder.'”
• “Russian dolls irk me. They always hide something within.”
• “Expressed to the gym coach my desire to do the splits. His query, ‘Your schedule’s stretch?’ My reply, ‘Weekends are tight.”
• “Attempted to grab some mist once. Failed.”
• “If laziness had a trophy, I’d delegate its collection.”
• “I don’t harbor dreams in a bucket, but my pending tasks could fill a scroll.”
• “Witnessed a man scatter his Scrabble set on the pavement. Queried, ‘What’s the talk of the town?”
• “I’d spin you a tale about building, but it’s under construction.”
• “I follow the sight-see diet. Spot delicacies, and they’re mine.”
• “Pondered a cerebral transplant but had a change of heart.”
• “Navigating a tactile horror narrative. An ominous event is close… I sense it.”
• “I excel at doing multiple things: dawdling, being idle, and delaying tasks.”
• “I have a jest about journeying through time, but it didn’t tickle your future self.”

Relationships & Dating One-Liners

• “Relationship update: Solo dining but duo sipping.”
• “My partner wished for more warmth from me. Hence, I diversified to two partners.”
• “Dated a lass with an unfocused gaze, realized she had side views too.”
• “True love is notifying someone about their hair add-ons.”
• “Set your beloved free. If they return, it seems no one else opted for them either.”
• “Wedding a tennis enthusiast? For them, ‘Love’ just zeroes the score.”
• “I might fumble at real-life dating, but my profile game is top-notch.”
• “My romantic journey resembles card play: No ace partner? A master stroke is needed.”
• “Maintaining the love spark past 24 months? You’re onto some secret potion.”
• “Matrimony is like a dual workspace… he’s at task while she’s on a spree.”
• “Exes? Nope, I have ‘Whys’. As in, ‘Why was that a chapter?”
• “Awaiting my knight not on a stallion but perhaps a dazed tortoise somewhere.”
• “A love alliance feels like a career. I’m currently not hiring.”
• “Not disputing, just laying down the facts of my correctness.”
• “Immediate romantic smitten is real, but revisiting that gaze doesn’t hurt.”
• “Ending ties feels like tilting a vending machine. Multiple nudges till it topples.”
• “Love might lack vision, but wedlock’s an optometry session.”
• “Researchers label love a mere reaction? Mine mirrors an epic blunder.”
• “My man’s idea of starlit romance? Illuminated joystick adventures.”
• “Asked him to present me the universe, and he handed over a miniature Earth.”

Work & Career One-Liners

• “Baking was my forte; the need for the dough was real.”
• “Resigned from my soda can-flattening role; too much emotional compression.”
• “Requested a pay bump from the boss. When he inquired how much, I pointed to the elusive top shelf.”
• “Why was the scarecrow celebrated? His stand-out performance amidst crops!”
• “Astronaut aspirations failed; lacked personal space.”
• “Alerted my employer about my dual vision today. He postponed our chat on hydration habits.”
• “Life in the calendar industry isn’t as date-filled as imagined.”
• “Banker parted ways with the cashier: overwhelmed by account-keeping.”
• “My workspace? A prism. It’s all about radiant tasks.”
• “Ventured into land mines camouflaged as prayer cushions. The upward trend in prophets is explosive!”
• “A doorman job eluded me due to inexperience. Figured it was the gateway role.”
• “Unity drives dreams, but with mismatched leaders and teams, nightmares ensue.”
• “Why is there skepticism around atoms? They’ve mastered the art of fabrication.”
• “Secured a role as a certified snoozer. It’s what dreams are made of!”
• “My cement gig? Stirring things into cohesion.”
• “Orange juice facility showed me the door: was too diluted.”
• “Retiree gags aplenty, but they’re all on a break.”
• “The bakery was my go-to; the dough was a necessity in more ways than one.”
• “Photography seemed sharp, but the snapshot of success blurred.”
• “Embarked on a lift-managing job. It’s a vertical roller coaster.”

Animals & Nature One-Liners

• “What’s a fish minus its sight? Fsh, indeed.”
• “Diving into an anti-gravity manuscript. It’s quite elevating.”
• “Would share a chem pun, but the outcome might be non-reactive.”
• “Announced a hiatus to my PC. It replied, ‘On the brink of a shutdown myself.'”
• “Why are skeletons non-confrontational? Lacking inner bravado.”
• “What made the scarecrow a star? His unparalleled farm performance.”
• “How to lure a squirrel? Scale a trunk and mimic a crazy seed!”
• “Why no seagull trajectories over bays? They’d morph into breakfast bread rings.”
• “My feline’s curiosity is next level. Hence, the purr-spective peeping?”
• “What’s birthed from a snow entity and a bloodsucker? Icy nips.”
• “What did the towering petal converse with the tiny one? Hey, sprout!”
• “What’s with the morose arithmetic tome? Overflow of quandaries.”
• “Reason for a golfer’s extra trousers? Anticipating a perfect shot mishap.”
• “Penguin’s architectural secret? Sticks and chills.”
• “What made the tomato blush? Spotted the salad getting dressed!”
• “Instructed my canine for a deathly act. A standing ovation ensued!”
• “Electrical experts and I gel well. Buzzing camaraderie, that!”
• “Why did the scarecrow ascend the ranks? His exemplary agrarian stance.”
• “Two aerials met atop, felt the spark, wedded. Simple rites, but the after-party was amplified!”
• “Blueprint for a cosmic bash? Stellar scheduling!”

Health & Well-being One-Liners

• “Discussed my giant dread with the counselor. Diagnosis? ‘Fee-Fi-fears.'”
• “Steps? Skeptical about them. They’re continually rising to mischief.”
• “For insomnia, I wouldn’t even lose sleep mulling over it.”
• “Why did the scarecrow take up counseling? His knack for attentive fieldwork.”
• “Diving into a book about levitation—finding it hard to lay aside.”
• “The banana sought medical aid: its zest was slightly off.”
• “Mentioned my frequent arm fractures to the medic. His advice? Avoid such spots.”
• “Had a fractured pencil quip, but its essence was null.”
• “My shrink highlights my commitment phobia. Contemplating ending our sessions.”
• “Reggae triangle gigs: A chain of singular resonances.”
• “Discussed my cheese obsession with a medic. Apparently, it’s only a soft inclination.”
• “Requested meds for unending gusts. Was handed a flying paper toy.”
• “Reason for the arithmetic mentor’s therapy? An overload of equations at a standstill.”
• “What made the fruit blush? Observing the greens getting prepped!”
• “Embarked on a diet journey. Misplaced a duo of dates so far.”
• “Suggested mindfulness to my spouse. Her take? ‘I’ll pass on this tranquil stint.”
• “Why such tension in the math manuscript? Overflow of tasks.”
• “Had a glimpse-and-gobble food routine. Every sight was a bite.”
• “Each health-conscious phase is disrupted by a festivity or a weekday.”
• “The whiskey weight loss plan? Misplaced 72 hours and counting.”

Technology & Modern Times One-Liners

• “Shared my feelings with my smartphone. Now, it floods me with emojis.”
• “Set my password as ‘wrong’ so the prompt always reminds me, ‘Your password is wrong.”
• “Why’d my phone opt for spectacles? Misplaced its number, buddies.”
• “Computer’s advice? Hit any key. Still scanning for that elusive ‘any.'”
• “Relationship update: Tried a hand-hold with my pup, got snubbed, and so I aimed for the TV changer.”
• “True adulthood? Getting thrilled about that brand-new kitchen scrub.”
• “Wishing for once the login could say, ‘Eh, near enough.”
• “Dubbed my storage “The Asset.” Monthly, it asks, ‘Want to support The Asset?”
• “My software’s devoid of glitches. But surprise functionalities? Plenty.”
• “A computer’s summer hack? Unleashing Windows.”
• “The silver lining with 404 errors? Their knack for unexpected pop-ups.”
• “Why’s there calendar confusion for coders? Oct 31 mirrors Dec 25.”
• “If dawn birds claim the worms, I’m content being an afternoon owl.”
• “Expert in guidance? Nah. But a witty retort? Always ready!”
• “Today’s world: My tot refers to Alexa as ‘mom’s assistant.'”
• “Why the coder resigned? Couldn’t handle the array of issues.”
• “Craving two long breaks annually. Too extravagant?”
• “Atoms are sketchy for scientists. Always up for fabrications.”
• “Got an EpiPen from a pal during his tough time. He seemed insistent I keep it.”
• “Dream era? When sitcom chuckles weren’t pre-recorded.”

Travel & Adventure One-Liners

• “My diet revolves around seafood. Whenever I spot food, especially on trips, it’s consumed.”
• “Promised my luggage a holiday outing. Now it’s weighed down with sentiments.”
• “Why did the bike rest on the ground? It felt the weight of dual exhaustion.”
• “Met someone who’s into the brake fluid, though he assures he can pause whenever.”
• “My mate’s eyeing archaeology. Told him he might end up as a relic.”
• “Currently engrossed in a sticky history of adhesives. Difficult to detach from!”
• “Ever camped amidst thick forests? The experience is wildly intense.”
• “Once flew planes, but the altitude wasn’t in sync with my attitude.”
• “Diving into a tome on anti-gravity. Makes my travels feel weightless.”
• “A pal’s bakehouse ignited. His ventures are now on the charred side.”
• “Whispering is risky on plantations. Spuds watch, and maize eavesdrops.”
• “I’m pretty knowledgeable about air propellers. Always been their admirer.”
• “Used to drive cabs, but fares never felt fair.”
• “Got a street-related jest, but it may come off as rough.”
• “Befriended an enthusiast crafting a fresh angle. He’s engrossed in a dynamic delta.”
• “They claim the Big Apple’s awake 24/7, but maybe a reset could do wonders?”
• “Journeying to a tunes store. Aiming for a melodic adventure.”
• “Attempted to grasp some haze on my voyage. Ended up with void.”
• “Every planner’s fate is preset, particularly those mapping out trips.”
• “I’ve got this lift-based jest. It’s multifaceted humor.”

Celestial & Astronomical One-Liners

• “Got a cosmic joke, but it’s a stretch for earthly minds.”
• “Why’d the sun miss the lecture? It was already shining!”
• “Organizing an interstellar bash? Chart it first!”
• “Why did the spaceman split from his love? He craved some void.”
• “Wish I could share a black hole jest, but it’s irresistibly captivating.”
• “Why’s the moon attending class? To light up its knowledge!”
• “Ever dined on the moon? Stellar dishes, but lacks ambiance.”
• “How do spacemen express regret? They offer ‘moon-cere’ apologies.”
• “Moon’s a good pal. A shadowy character, yet beams every night.”
• “If Earth was one giant nation, its center of governance would be the Pole – where all axes converge.”
• “Heard about the astronaut and gum? He’s now in a sticky orbit.”
• “Planning an extraterrestrial soiree? Chart it, then invite a comet!”
• “Saturn stands out in the galaxy; must be those trendy rings.”
• “Between moon and Mars eateries, Martian diners promise more vibes.”
• “Dated a celestial body once, but its pull was overwhelming.”
• “Stars in the kitchen? They’d rather space out than cook.”
• “Galactic chocolates? They’re universally delicious!”
• “Composing a tune on satellite positioning. Titled ‘High-Maintenance Heights’.”
• “Endless universe, finite cosmic puns.”
• “A neutron orders a beer. Barkeep says, ‘On the house!”

Time & History One-Liners

• “Studying the past? That’s yesterday’s news.”
• “A timepiece on your crown? That’s a timely accessory!”
• “Hours soar like arrows; fruits attract critters.”
• “Why gobble up assignments? Because it’s a bite of knowledge.”
• “I’ve got a jest about yesteryears, but it’s a touch dated.”
• “Why’s the arithmetic manual gloomy? Too many old issues.”
• “One barrier whispered to its mate, ‘Catch you on the flip side!”
• “I’d joke about time periods, but it gets complicated.”
• “Know the number guru scared of minuses? He stops before zero.”
• “Beethoven parted with his fowls; they’d only ‘Bach’!”
• “Caesar’s reason to buy colors? To highlight Antony!”
• “ Retirement jests? They’re a bit unproductive.”
• “Had a time-jumping jest, but you found it dull in the future.”
• “Antique jests are from bygone eras, yet they age well.”
• “Warned my history tutor I’d time-hop, he said, ‘Seen in the annals!”
• “Historians’ cherished snack? Chronological dates.”
• “Why’d the past enthusiast hit the shore? For time-worn sands.”
• “Infinite jest? It’s a looped tale.”
• “Once kneaded for baking, now I unravel historical layers.”
• “A snooze alert in history? Don’t fret; he’s just time-traveling.”

Life & Philosophy One-Liners

• “Life’s no storybook. Lose footwear post-twilight? You’ve likely had one too many.”
• “Informed my luggage of the canceled vacation. Now I’m drowning in sentimental overload.”
• “Existence unfolds as you’re engrossed charting trajectories, then misplacing and redrafting them.”
• “My diet’s maritime-based: Whenever food sails into view, I anchor it down.”
• “Existence is fleeting. Can’t you chuckle at your blunders? Ping me; I’ve got a giggle ready.”
• “My days are just a blend of clumsy episodes punctuated by nibbles.”
• “Fate skipped the lemon drop, yet I stirred up a citrusy drink. Still puzzled about the lemon’s origin.”
• “In a just universe, vino wouldn’t count the calories.”
• “Navigating life’s academy? I’m likely in the ‘time-out’ corner.”
• “Life’s guiding principle: Fail the first round? Dial the pizzeria.”
• “Once felt ambivalent was my middle name. These days, I’m reevaluating.”
• “Aim to mirror caterpillars: Devour, nap expansively, and emerge dazzling.”
• “Dawn’s bird bags its breakfast, but the backup rodent nabs the delicacy.”
• “Existence lacked a user guide. It offered a mom instead. She mislaid the guidebook.”
• “Existence is an expedition. Predominantly to my refrigerator.”
• “Ditch the negativity, dodgy pals, and tasteless meals. Life’s brief.”
• “Whiskey’s my dietary choice. Misplaced a trio of days this week.”
• “If existence tosses you melon-sized issues, check your reading glasses.”
• “Don’t need elastic bands to consolidate life – a potent brew does the trick.”
• “Life mirrors restroom rolls. Either you’re on an upswing or enduring someone’s nonsense.”

One-liners offer a swift punch of humor, capturing the essence of wit in a mere sentence. This collection takes you on a roller coaster of giggles, traversing diverse themes from relationships to technology. These 200 quips are sure to elevate your mood, proving once again that brevity truly is the soul of wit. Enjoy and share a laugh!

I am a passionate beer connoisseur with a deep appreciation for the art and science of brewing. With years of experience tasting and evaluating various beers, I love to share my opinions and insights with others and I am always eager to engage in lively discussions about my favorite beverage.

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139 Best Travel Jokes and Puns 2024 – Thai and Stop me…

When traveling the world, the humor never fails. A lot of things can go wrong on your holidays, family vacation, couple retreat, or backpacker trip. These funny traveler jokes will help to lighten the mood.

Dear World Travelers, since you enjoy the world so much, you will enjoy these funny vacation jokes even more. Okay, not sure if even more, but these jokes will make every travel laugh. Travel humor is part of exploring the world.

Sharing these jokes? ❤️️

Please add a link to this article . Your support helps us to write more entertaining articles for you and all joke-lovers 🙂

Laugh more : my favorite vacation puns and beach jokes (for summer holidays)

I collected a bunch of funny traveling puns and jokes that everyone who stepped outside the comfort zone will make juggle. You will find jokes and puns about travel related to countries like France, city names like Nice and so much more.

I challenge you as well to take on our trivia travel questions and Quiz . I added the best travel quiz and my own travel questions for beginner, advanced and wanderlust-pros. For the background music, here are my favorite New York City songs .

Even better : We have summed up the 69 MOST DIRTY Jokes for Adults (seriously not for kids)

We share with you:

Best Travel Jokes of all Time (Updated 2024)

So you have been looking for the best travel jokes of all time? Well, this list is at the very least close to them. Keep scrolling to find out what happened to the suitcase and where Santa Clause sleeps.

Before you dive into this humorous sentences (also called jokes…), I put together actually funny lockdown jokes too. You know, since this situation is so annoying, we just have to take it with a sense of humor. Here are funny quarantine jokes too. That surely will help!

Here are the best travel jokes for the explorer of the world.

Covid-19 Travel Jokes: This is how cities are called in 2020 and 2021:

Laugh more: Funny London Jokes

Where do cows go on vacation?

Laugh more: Hilarious Cow Jokes

What happens when you wear a watch on a plane?

Time flies!

Me : the Airline lost my luggage, so I tried to sue them.

Someone : Did you win?

Me : Unfortunately not, I lost the case.

Why did Mister Krabs not invite Spongebob to go on vacation?

Because he is absolutely Shellfish.

Read : the best animal joke s with cats, dogs and camels

Running to the Departures Gate is my kind of cardio. #fitness

Is it only me, or does my cat always look at me like I asked her to give me a ride to the airport?!

Which type of traveler is the most calm?

The No-mad.

“A hotel minibar allows you to 
see into the future and find out what a can of Pepsi will cost in 2037.” – Comedian Rich Hall

Why do people take an instant dislike to flight attendants?

To save time later.

Where does a cow stay when it is on vacation?

A mooooo-tel!

Where does Santa Claus stay on a vacation? In a Ho-Ho-Hotel. Laugh more: Funny Christmas Jokes

Where do pepperonis go on vacation?

The Leaning Tower of Pizza.

Laugh more: Crust-Worthy Pizza Puns

Can’t believe this is the first year I’m not going to Fiji because of COVID-19…

Normally, I don’t go because I’m poor.

Where do sheep go on vacation?

They go to the baaaaaahaaaaaamas.

Traveling on a train for too long:

Conductor on a train : “But sir, you cannot travel with this! This is a child’s ticket! You’re at least 19 years old!”

Backpacker : “You see how horribly long your delays are? You should be ashamed!”

My passport just called me. It’s super bored. Guess I have to travel then.

Where do sharks go on holiday?

Laugh more: Amusing Fish Jokes

“How can you ever be late for anything in London? They have 
a huge clock right in the middle 
of the town.”

– Jimmy Kimmel

Read also my favorite dad jokes of all time . For families with children, I wrote up all my favorite jokes for kids .

How do you know if an elephant loves to travel?

Because he always packs his own trunk.

Few things I love as much as traveling:

• Thinking about travel
• travel planning
• watching travel documentaries
• reading travel blogs
• reading travel magazines
• booking flights
• booking accommodation
• scroll instagram for travel photos
• make a bucket list

When visiting a new city…

Brain : I think we should start by visiting a museum and a city tour.

Heart : LET’S EAT ALL THEIR FOOD!

Read more: Chicago Jokes for an Extra Windy Day

Me : I want to travel.

Bank Account : Like…to the park?

Travel Humor? Nah…travel is way too serious…

Question : What kind of chocolate do they sell at every airport in the world? Answer : Plane Chocolate.

Why do witches stay in hotels?

She heard they always have great broom service!

Travel is only about fun, until it comes to unpacking.

When your family complains you travel too much…

Just tell them: “ You should be happy…I could be drug addict! Do you realize how lucky you are? ”

How do recognize a friendly ocean?

Laugh more: Funny Beach Jokes

What’s the favorite Airline of a British stylist?

British Hairways.

Travel Puns

When traveling around Europe, these puns will come in handy. Okay, you may get some eye-rolling, but someone will celebrate your fun puns for sure.

When in Rome…

It’s impossible to ruin this view!

For every city you love…

I just a- door this city!

How do fleas like to travel?

Itch hiking!

Read more here: Inspiring Hiking Quotes for Instagram

When in Paris…

This place is rem- arc -able!

When in the Netherlands…

Windmills? I’m a huge fan!

When in Romania…Why did the tired traveler go to Romania?

So he could Buch-a-rest.

When in Portugal….

I love my Portuguese friends, but they never lisbon to me.

When visiting Pompeii in Italy…

What does one volcano say to the other volcano?

I lava you!

When in Mexico…

Bean there, eat that.

On the airplane…

The food served on the flight was plane, but what did you expect…

Laugh more with our FUNNY Airplane Jokes That Are Ready to Take Off!

For #vanlife… We’re going on an ad-van-ture!

When in France…

I will travel to France. You know why? Because I have nothing Toulouse.

Ever heard of glamping?

My current mood: pretty tents!

When in Thailand…

You know what, PHUKET…I am leaving!

These temples are certainly Buddha-ful!

When in Vietnam…

Have a rice day.

Where do bees go on holiday?

Stingapore!

Every Native Spanish Speaker will love you:

Adios, beaches.

Read : 41 more puns and jokes for the beach

My phone is rome-ing , me too.

What travels around the world but stays in one corner? A stamp.

When visiting Machu Picchu and Cusco, Pero

PERUsing from the mountain tops

Laugh more here: Hilarious Mountain Puns and Jokes

When hiking the mountains…

Wood you believe I hiked over two hours for this view.

Traveling to Bora Bora…

Friend : I want to travel to Bora Bora.

Me : But I am Pora Pora.

Which U.S. state is famous for its extra-small soft drinks?

When in Europe…

If you think Roman architecture is limited to Italy, the Spanish and French would Pont-edly disagree.

For the hikers only the best puns…

Canyon believe the beauty of this view?

A journalist left his job and went back home train. It was an Ex-Press train.

Before backpacking Thailand…

Thai and Stop me…

Where do hamsters go on vacation? Hamsterdam!

Travel Jokes One Liners

Jokes and gags do not need to be long to be funny. I had a look and collected a bunch of funny one liners travel jokes. They are easy to remember and come with a great punch-line.

Some of the travel puns above could be count as one-line jokes. Either way, I tried my best to categories them. But, please, go up and check the puns for backpackers and globetrotters as well.

What is the Capital of Spain?

Laugh out loud with jokes about Spain

How do rabbits like to travel?

By Hareplane!

I wish that road trips could pay my bills.

Laugh more: Hilarious Funny Road Trip Jokes – For Kids, Camper Fans and Van Lifers

I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach.

Laugh more : hilarious funny beach gags for the summer

Here are my favorite beach quotes too. copy them and enjoy the Ice Cream!

I have never been good in Geography. But I can name at least one city in France, which is Nice.

I wish I was a postcard. For under $2 you can travel the world to any location in the world.

“I went to the story and wanted to buy Camouflage trousers for hiking. But I could not find any.”

Tommy Cooper

How can people my age plan spontaneous trips to Thailand, I can barely afford a spontaneous Coca Cola at corner shop.

How much fun is it to do your laundry when traveling?

Laugh more: Funny Cleaning Jokes

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoes at midnight, you are drunk.

I need a reasonably paid job. Something like $2000 an hour. Nothing too wild…

Backpacking is money spent on Education.

Yeah, working is great…but have you tried travelling?

Time Travel Jokes

Okay, technically time travel is not what we mean by saying traveling. Vacation and holiday, that’s what more comes to our minds. However, we wanted to collect a bunch of funny time travel jokes. Give it a read, your future you will have enjoyed them.

If not, you can always travel back in time, and you know, not read them…

We are all-time travelers. We are all moving at the speed of precisely 60 minutes per hour.

Why can cutlery teleport but not time travel?

It’s silverwhere, not silverwhen.

Time Travel Classes: Starts 1912.

A time traveler went back in time and saw a CIA agent

Time traveler : What year is it?

CIA Agent : 1963

Time traveler : Before or after JFK wa…

CIA Agent : Before

I would tell y’all a joke about time travel…

But y’all didn’t like it

How does a Flat Earther travel the world?

On a plane.

It time is money…an ATM is a time machine?

Read more: Finance Jokes

He : “I went back in time and killed Adolf Hitler”

He : “Who?”

Funny Travel Quotes

Next on the list comes hilarious travel quotes to make you smile. We all know these kind of quotes you would just love to print on your shirt, your suitcase or even hang as a poster in your bed room. The following humorous travel quotes will help you to get a step closer. Copy them, use them, share them.

In case you use them, you can tag us along. We appreciate the love and would enjoy seeing your travel shots.

I followed my heart and it led me to the Airport.

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

I’ve got 99 problems. But I’m on vacation so I’m ignoring them all!

You cannot make everyone happy. You are not a plane ticket.

Can we just skip to the part in my life where I travel the world?

Work hard.  Travel harder.

Constant Mood : Packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip. Unpacks 3 months after coming home.

I need 6 months of vacation. Twice a year.

That moment when boarding is complete. And the seat next to you is empty.

I need a vacation so long, I forget all my passwords!

Do you ever stress about money and then accidentally book another flight?

Forget champagne and caviar – taste the world instead!

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel magazine!

Should I go to work today? Or just book a 1-way ticket to Mexico?

Laugh more: Funny Mexico Jokes

Stuck somewhere between “ I need to save ” and “ you only live once “.

Can’t decide if I need a hug, an XL coffee, 6 shots of vodka, or 2 months of travel.

Laugh more: Amusing Coffee Jokes

A coconut a day keeps the doctor away.

You’ve never felt true fear until your passport isn’t where you think you left it.

Vacation calories don’t count.

Airports : the only place where drinking 8 AM is socially acceptable.

Knock Knock Jokes

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Europe Europe who? No, you are!

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Hawaii Hawaii who? I’m good, Hawaii you?!

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Cargo Cargo who? Car go “beep beep”

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Romeo Romeo who? Romeo cross this lake in this canoe!

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Buck and Ham B uck and Ham who? Buck and Ham palace!

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Oscar Oscar who? Oscar if she wants to go on the trip with us!

Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Sherwood Sherwood who? I Sherwood like to leave school right now for our trip!

Laugh more: School Jokes

Extra: Quarantine Travel Jokes

These witty travelling jokes will make you laugh so hard that you will forget about lockdown.

Oman, I really can’t wait to Rome around.

Venice this going to get over?

Wives are now Cochin their husbands new skills (dish washing, mopping?)

Laugh more: Funny Marriage Jokes

At this rate, I see my savings Dublin

I’ve decided to finally wear my New Jersey which I’ve been storing for ages.

This Spain is real.

Stay home, stay safe. What’s the Russia?

Maybe Indore is not such a bad place after all.

You can’t say when this lockdown will be over, Kenya?

Quarantine has made my Delhi routine too boring.

My sore throat is on account of endless Zoom chats these days.

Laugh more: Funny Working From Home Jokes

We need all the Lucknow more than ever before..

I’m sorry, but Iran out of travel puns.

DUBAI your masks and gloves and wear them?

I’ve been Washington’s of utensils.

Laugh more: Funny Washington DC Jokes

Summary of Best Travel Puns and Jokes

I sincerely hope you had a great time reading these puns, quotes and jokes about travelling. We are keeping this list up to date and fresh. I also collected the 51 top USA songs to add to your playlist.

Do you have your own travel riddles, quizzes, puns or jokes? Then come on, do not let your travel mates hanging and share them in the comments below.

We will publish all the good and juicy stuff. Oh and remember, a Joke a a day keeps the Doctor away.

Since you stayed until the end, here are more jokes to give you more giggles and laughter:

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• Adult Jokes 30
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These jokes may contain profanity 🤔

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Most Inspirational Travel Quotes

Travel quotes are there to express the feeling you experienced while traveling. Combine the best travel quotes with the power of an image and instantly let people have a taste of your travel feelings. This collection of travel quotes is made to inspire and motivate you and others to pack your bags and go explore! Or simply to add as a travel caption under your brand new Instagram post or to pin to your Pinterest . Also read our adventure quotes to spark your wanderlust !

Top 50 Best Travel Quotes

1. “Jobs fill your pockets, adventures fill your soul.” 2. “Remember that happiness is a way of travel, not a destination.” 3. “The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.” 4. “Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer.”

5. “Travel is my therapy. ” – Travel Quote

6. “ In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take ” In 2017, we took an exciting and scary step. We decided to turn our travel blog from a hobby into our full-time job. We would’ve had so much regret if we didn’t take this opportunity. Now, each of these travel quotes fit the stories we’ve made.

Also read:   45 Epic Adventure Quotes that spark your Wanderlust!

7. “My goal is to run out of pages in my passport.” 8. “Not all those who wander are lost.” 9. “Travel is an investment in yourself.”

10. “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

11. “Life is short, and the world is wide.” 12. “It’s not what you look at that matters. It’s what you see.” 13. “The goal is to die with memories not dreams.” 14. “Sandy Toes sunkissed nose.”

Don’t miss our list of 45 Epic Adventure Quotes that spark your Wanderlust!

15. “Dare to live the life you’ve always wanted. ”

16. “Travel. Your money will return. Your time won’t.” 17. “Some beautiful paths can’t be discovered without getting lost.” 18. “Collect Moments, Not Things.” 19. “Live life with no excuses, travel with no regret.”

20. “Adventures are the best way to learn.”

21. “Once the Travel bug bites there is no known antidote, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life.” 22. “We have nothing to lose and a world to see.” 23. “We don’t need objects; we need adventures.” 24. “Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.”

25. “I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” – Popular Travel Quote

26. “Of all the books in the world. The best stories are found between the pages of a passport.” 27. “Work, Travel, Save, Repeat.” 28. “Travel opens your heart, broadens your mind, and fills your life with stories to tell.” 29. “I love places that make you realize how tiny you and your problems are.”

30. “Have stories to tell not stuff to show. ”

31. “If we were meant to stay in one place, we’d have roots instead of feet.” 32. “At the end of the day your feet should be dirty, your hair messy and your eyes sparkling.” 33. “Don’t let fear get in the way of the life you are meant to live.” 34. “I travel because I become uncomfortable being too comfortable.”

35. “Leave nothing but footprints, take nothing but photos, kill nothing but time. ”

36. “Always take the scenic road.” 37. “Live your life by a compass, not a clock.” 38. “Go where you feel most alive.”

39. “I want to make memories all over the world” Every destination you’ll visit leaves its own unique memory. Our travels through Sri Lanka , Myanmar , or Petra in Jordan already give us goosebumps. As this travel quote says: Make memories all over the world!

Read: 7 Tips to level up your Instagram Stories

40. “Travel is the healthiest addiction ”

40. “Doing what you like is freedom, liking what you do is happiness.” 41. “Happiness is planning a trip with the ones that you love.” 43. “I don’t know where I’m going but I’m going. Are you coming with me?” 44. “Let’s get lost.”

45. “The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams”

46. “Beach please.” 47. “Don’t call it a dream. Call it a plan.” 48. “Don’t be that person who is too busy when you are young and then too tired when you are old.” 49. “Travel makes you realize that no matter how much you know, there’s always more to learn.”

50. “Ocean air, salty hair.”

Wanderlust Travel Quotes

Now you know our favorite travel quotes, what will you be using them for? You can use these quotes for many purposes.

• Are you gifting your friend a birthday or Christmas travel gift ? Write one of these travel quotes on a note to add to your gift to him or her.
• Looking for a great travel caption to add your post on Instagram, TikTok, or another platform? Feel free to any of these!
• Are you looking for quotes to complete your Pinterest board? Each image has a ‘save’ button to save it to Pinterest. If you don’t see the button, move your mouse over the image.
• Use these quotes to satisfy your travel cravings and feed your wanderlust!

Hopefully, you found inspiration out of these travel quotes. We will continue to update and extend the article every few months with new images and quotes.

By purchasing through our links, you support us at no additional cost. Thank you for your support. ♥️

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• Book Tours & Attractions via Viator
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Adventure Quotes to Fuel your Wanderlust

Worldpackers review: volunteer abroad and work exchange, how to become vegetarian: 8 super simple steps.

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50 funny cat jokes that are totally paw-some

If you're a fan of felines and love a completely awful dad joke , then you've come to the right place.

To ensure that you get your fill of both, we've gathered a compilation of cat jokes that, dare we say, are nothing short of purr-fect.

You're probably groaning already knowing that you're in for a pile of bad cat puns and corny one-liners and, yep, you're absolutely right. But even though most of them are, ahem, purr-day bad, we can't help but think they're hiss-terical.

In fact, when it comes to coming up with dumb jokes that are all things feline-related, well, the paw-sibilities are endless.

For instance, what do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas, naturally. Or, did you hear the one about the kittens who got into an argument ? It was a cat-tastrophe.

But, wait, there's more. Why did the cop arrest the cat ? It was caught littering. What do cats put in their houses? Fur-niture, of course.

By now, we're guessing you get the point and if funny puns and paw-some jokes aren't up your alley, it's best if you take your cattitude elsewhere, because this one's dedicated to all the feline fans out there.

Best Funny Cat Jokes

• What do you call a stylish cat? A dandy lion.
• What's a cat's favorite color? Purr-ple.
• What do you call a tiger that likes pickles? A sour puss.
• Why don't cats shop in stores? They prefer cat-alogs.
• What is a cat's favorite song? “Three Blind Mice.”

• Why don't leopards play hide-and-go-seek? They're always spotted.
• What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.
• Two kittens got into a big argument. It was a total cat-astrophe.
• What did one cat say to the other? How do you like meow?
• What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.

• Why did the cop arrest the cat? It got caught littering.
• What kind of cats teach college classes? Purr-fessors.
• What do cats prefer to eat when they go out to dinner? Paw-sta.
• Why was the kitten unpopular at school? It had a bad cat-titude.
• Did you hear about the cat that made a mistake? It was a total faux paw.

• What's a kitten's favorite game? Cat and mouse.
• Why did the cat bring its watch to the bank? It wanted to save time.
• Did you hear about the cat that went to the doctor? It wasn't feline well.
• What do cats put in their houses? Fur-niture.
• Where do you find a cat with no legs? Right where you left him.
• Did you hear about the cat that burned dinner? It had to start over from scratch.

• What do you call a cat that's always telling on you? A tattle tail.
• How do you motivate a cat? Remind them to stay paws-ative.
• What's a cat's favorite band? Mew Kids on the Block.
• What's stranger than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
• What do you give a cat with allergies? An anti-hiss-tamine.
• Why are cats always tired on April 1? Because they just finished a 31-day March.
• How do cats mix cake batter? With whiskers.

• What kind of felines can bowl? Alley cats.
• How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.
• What's the best way to catch a catfish? Have someone throw it to you.
• What do you call a cat with eight legs? An octo-puss.
• How do you hire a cat? Put up a ladder.

• What's worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis.
• Did you hear about the cat that ate a bad sausage? It was the wurst.
• Why can't you play board games in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
• Did you hear about the cat that lost its left legs? It's all right now.
• Where did the cat go after losing its tail? The retail store.

• What do you call a fibbing cat? Lion.
• I once met a giant cat. I didn't know what to say so I used big words.
• How do cats talk quietly? They whis-purr.
• Why are cats good at keeping secrets? They don't hiss and tail.

• Did you hear about the angry cat? It got hot under the collar.
• Did you hear about the cat that almost fell off a cliff? It lived to tell the tail.
• What do cat artists usually paint? Self paw-traits.
• What kind of cars do cats prefer to drive? Fur-arris.

• Why do people like having cats as pets? They're purr-dy.
• Why did the cat go to a therapist? It had claw-strophobia.
• Why do cats make good comedians? They're hiss-terical.
• What did the teacher say after he caught the kitten cheating? Don't be a copycat.

Sarah is a lifestyle and entertainment reporter for TODAY who covers holidays, celebrities and everything in between.

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